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Original poster

How are other parents of children with SEN/EHCP coping without school?

55 replies

acidburning · 09/05/2020 22:24

We're not really.

DS is autistic and not done any work since schools closed. Won't really engage. No siblings and no friends to make contact with. All support and therapy withdrawn except medication increased. Increasing mental health problems etc. The longer it goes on, the less likely we will be able to get him to leave the house / engage in education in the future.

I really hope we get some guidance on schools tomorrow. If it's September for opening or just further open ended waiting, I think I'm going to have to take up an 'EHCP' place that the government said we were entitled to as this isn't sustainable much longer.

How is everyone else doing?

OP posts:

PumpkinP · 09/05/2020 22:30

I have a dd with autism, she is 9, she also hasn’t done any work at all as I can’t get her to do any (she screams or cries if I try) at school she has full 1:1 and I’m expected to get her to do her work and look after 3 other children. She won’t go out at all either, she’s been out once in the 7 weeks as she refuses to go and can’t be left home alone either meaning the other children can’t go out either. She’s really going to struggle when the schools go back, I don’t know if I should be forcing her to go out but it just ends up with crying and we have to come home.

MelonsMcGee · 09/05/2020 22:36

Hi Op, the DFE released guidance for LAs last week that schools and LAs should make reasonable endeavours time provide section F for YP and if any temporary changes are to be made to provision the these must be in writing and agreed by parents. If you aren't happy with the provision your DC is getting the give your plan co a call (their name will be on the last but one page of the EHCP normally )

MelonsMcGee · 09/05/2020 22:36

To not time! Stupid phone!

Original poster

acidburning · 09/05/2020 22:39

Oh god, what bit is section F? Is that the column on the right with all the personalised stuff in? (Last review was 2 years ago) - I wonder how schools could deliver the content unless the child is on site? I'll look at the guidance, thanks so much.

OP posts:

Original poster

acidburning · 09/05/2020 22:40

@PumpkinP sounds very similar to here. It's really tough isn't it.

OP posts:

howsicklyarsekissy · 09/05/2020 22:44

My boy is 13 & autistic & really challenging. I really didn't want him in school initially as was worried about him catching it or putting staff at risk etc. It's been so hard though the last couple weeks & he has attacked me so he has been going into school once a week with the option of going another day as well from next week. He is in a mainstream with an enhanced unit. We were in the middle of finding a special school before lockdown as well.

MelonsMcGee · 09/05/2020 23:24

Section F is the legal bit about provision... so, therapies, 1:1 etc

Basically, if your DC needs therapies and is legally entitled to them then they need to continue if you think they are necessary. If not, then you LA need to step in and ensure 'reasonable endeavours' are being made to meet your child's needs.
That being said, if they are offering and you choose not to send your DC in (which is absolutely your choice), they probably won't be able to convert them to outreach therapies as you don't have that in your section F

HotPenguin · 09/05/2020 23:55

My DS doesn't have an EHCP, if he did I would definitely send him in to school. Lockdown is impacting on his mental health, I worry this could impact on him long term as he's very moody, insular and sometimes violent. He needs to keep up social contact with children his age and I'm worried his social.skills will get even more behind. I'm doing the absolute minimum of school work, almost none, and focussing on keeping him active and doing interesting things. At the beginning I was worried about him getting I'll but now I feel the lockdown itself is doing more harm and I'm keen to get him back to school.

sestras · 09/05/2020 23:58

My son has asd/adhd. He has been doing the work so has been engaging with his teacher. He has spoken to 1 of his friends since lockdown a few times but I try and keep him busy.

He likes his iPad so I do let him on that way more than I should but it's whatever helps him stay happy.

Bluewarbler27 · 10/05/2020 01:24

My adult autistic son is going back on Monday. He lives there term time.

I can’t wait it’s been a long 7 weeks!

Bluewarbler27 · 10/05/2020 01:27

An EHCP legally has to be reviewed yearly. Have a look at the IPSEA website. There is lots of advice on the legal side of things.

Original poster

acidburning · 10/05/2020 07:43

An EHCP legally has to be reviewed yearly. Have a look at the IPSEA website. There is lots of advice on the legal side of things.

It's been a weird couple of years. We had an emergency review when he fell out of education and then lots of waiting while trying to find a school. Then his new school wanted to wait till they knew him better which pushed it longer and now I've no idea when they will do it.

Is anyone's school encouraging your child to go? Our school just keeps saying 'we'll, government says you shouldn't leave home, soooo....' which is why we've not sent him obviously but if this goes on till the autumn, his education and mental health needs start taking priority.

OP posts:

Norecallpup · 10/05/2020 07:59

All the children at my school with EHCPs have been offered full time places in school along with the key worker’s children. Is that not the same in all schools?

dairyfairies · 10/05/2020 08:01

DD with severe ASD/learning diffs. I also have another child.

I WFH 5 days a weeks as work won't furlough me and I am a lone parent.

I basically park DD in front of the iPad all day. no schooling (cannot, because I work and she won't work independently).

school won't have her as I am not a key worker...

we are all pretty stressed and DD is really struggling. crying loads as I cannot give her attention either, lashing out. it's pretty shit really.

dairyfairies · 10/05/2020 08:03

All the children at my school with EHCPs have been offered full time places in school along with the key worker’s children. Is that not the same in all schools?

DD attends a special school. all children have an EHCP and therefore, only key worker children are allowed to attend. otherwise school would have to run pretty much at full capacity which isn't possible.

OneInEight · 10/05/2020 08:05

Not for ds1 (mainstream sixth form) but he is coping well anyway. More worried about how he copes with transitioning back in if the gap is too long. Struggled with noise at the start of the year (went from tiny special school to large college). For ds2 we cancelled his home tutors last week because he was not engaging at all with them online so that's it I think as far as his education goes.

Original poster

acidburning · 10/05/2020 08:21

All the children at my school with EHCPs have been offered full time places in school along with the key worker’s children. Is that not the same in all schools?

Nope! Actively encouraged not to as it 'wasn't safe - government says so'. There was a post a few weeks ago asking the same and most children with EHCP weren't attending for the same reasons.

Tbh initially when it was for 6 weeks ish, I thought that it was and is safer for him to be at home and reduce the spread. But now, a more long term plan is needed because other risks are taking over.

OP posts:

Spikeyball · 10/05/2020 08:23

My son is back in school. His special school is one of the few that are open and he was given priority for mental health needs. He is still very anxious and still has self injurious and 'aggressive' behaviour but being in school has taken the edge off it.

Bobbybobbins · 10/05/2020 08:23

We have two DS with EHCPs. Our eldest is at an enhanced resource mainstream school. We kept him off for the first 3 weeks if lockdown though the school offered to have him. We are also both keyworkers but were mostly wfh then. Now we are back at work more he is attending 2 days a week. He was doing well with homeschool but it was massively affecting him socially and some behaviours were coming back.

Our younger DS is at a mainstream nursery and is going 2 mornings a week now after being off for 3 weeks.

Mummypig2020 · 10/05/2020 08:26

I work with adults with learning disabilities. They are massively struggling, to the point that they have had to reopen the day centre because the risk to their mental health is greater.

averythinline · 10/05/2020 08:32

If your child /young person has an EHCP you do not need to be a keyworker.... it is the child that is vulnerable .... if their school is shut then the LA may have other options...as some have combined special school provision ....most have some special schools open
Earlier on schools werent sure how many staff/children - how the numbers would work out but my understanding is most have settled now and have a clearer idea..ask again if you need too..

Winnipegdreamer · 10/05/2020 08:39

DS 11, who has ASD and ADHD, absolutely bouncing off the walls. His autism means he’s loving not having to socialise or leave the house but his adhd means he’s absolutely epically hyper with not much means of burning it off. His school won’t allow him in even though he has an EHCP.

OH is a key worker, I’m full time working from home and I’m about to crash I’m sure if it

dairyfairies · 10/05/2020 08:41

Avery I am drowning but noone in interested. DD is not deemed at risk. So nobody cares - also nobody cares about the carer and how I am supposed to cope with working and homeschooling 2 DC all by myself.

It's all just lip service that children with EHCP who need to be on school can attend. I can assure you it is nothing but bullshit. I am at the receiving and of it all. Nobody cares, nobody is responsible.

JustOneSquareofDarkChocolate · 10/05/2020 08:43

My DC with mild additional needs are back at school for their mental health - it’s a private school, don’t know if that makes any difference; teachers were happy to have them alongside the key worker children.

Punxsutawney · 10/05/2020 08:54

My autistic Ds is in year 11 and does not have an EHCP and is just on SEN support. He finds it very difficult to do any academic work at home, home is his safe space away from school. As he is year 11 the pressure is off as Gcses have been cancelled. He is coping with lockdown as his normal life is very isolated, he didn't have any friends or any life outside of the house before the pandemic He has a rigid routine now at home, most of the day is spent in his computer with a couple of breaks at specific times. He's barely eating anything though, he's not eaten a cooked meal for at least six weeks.

My main concern is getting him back to education in September (if that's when they go back). We were hoping that he would be moving to another school for sixth form as he has had a terrible time at his present school. But without even an induction day to go to I'm not sure he will be able to make the transition and because he doesn't have an EHCP we can't expect any help. In actual fact I'm not sure he will want to return to education at all after six months off.

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