If you have broken Lockdown rules then what is your reason?

[beesthatbuzz]

I doubt I'll get a lot of responses as no one will admit but I'm getting a bit fed up of people around me clearly disregarding the rules. Having friends and family around mainly, not just dropping off shopping but going into the house, several barbeques, two families (sisters and OHs) with all their kids in their front garden in a paddling pool this afternoon). And it's not just one person, it's loads of people. Call me a curtain twitcher all you want but I'm genuinely interested in people's reasons and I'm too chicken to ask them in real life.

I am desperate to see my Mum who lives 150 miles away, My lovely Dad died 3 weeks before lockdown so she's grieving and depressed but we are sticking to the rules, even though it pains me to see her in tears on our daily messenger chats.

Many other people seem to be doing whatever the hell they want and I'm wondering if we are actually the stupid ones for sticking to it.

I have a history of severe mental ill-health, lost my partner to suicide last year, am a lone parent of two young school children who I’m having to home-school at different key-stages, am still working full time from home in an extremely pressurised management job as a key worker, have money worries, my parents (who usually help me) are elderly & been totally isolating for 2 months, I was running the very real risk of becoming suicidal and leaving my children without a mother.

So yes. I’ve “broken the rules”. However, I’ve employed common sense, discretion, scientific research and my experience as a HCP to weigh up the harms v benefits in assessing those risks.

I will not apologise on here or anywhere else for this, and I hope none of the PP’s who have also posted tales of extreme hardship feel guilty for “breaking the rules” either. One size doesn’t fit all.

OP go and see your mum, don’t waste any more energy on worrying about what other people are doing, or what anyone on MN thinks.

As a family we have really stuck to the rules and all go out once a day to walk dog and granddaughter ..so five walks individually. We do occasionally see people we know so walk and chat 2 m apart . My daughter did today for her MH meet a friend with a baby meet up and chat at 2 m apart . TBH we cannot take any dangerous risk because the care home I work at is Covid free and we need to avoid any risk.

I have had 2 walks of 5000 steps each instead of 1 walk of 10000 steps over the last week. When I got tired, I sat on a bench in the park.

I have visited a friend and sat in her garden, but we did observe the 2 metre rule, and we don't have coffee.

I have driven 35 miles to my house; I rentin a flat in a city while the house is being extensively renovated. All work has stopped, but I usually visit once a week to pick up mail and cut the grass. I don't go into shops or have any interaction with anyone while there.

I am careful - I click and collect, and haven't been to any other shops since lockdown started.

I am struggling with lockdown!

My mum is coming round tomorrow coming through the side gate to sit in the back garden for an hour at a distance. I absolutely can’t wait think the risk is minimal but is absolutely needed. She lives on her own and this lockdown is becoming really hard for her. Find it strange I can stand in a line at a diy store with a stranger in front and behind yet not allowed to sit in my garden with a greater distance with my mum?

@pamplemoussed driving lessons are one of those actions where yes the roads are quiet and I can see the logic but by dint of being a learner with less experience an accident is more likely, meaning more pressure on emergency services.

I've been to the cemetery several times.
The first couple of weeks I didn't go because it wasn't an essential journey. As the weeks went on I found it incredibly hard not to visit my dd's grave.
I usually go to the supermarket at the same time. Just being able to tend to her grave and spend some time quietly sitting there has helped me cope with lockdown.
I don't care if people judge me.

Oooo you’ll hate us OP! My family, my brother’s family and my parents all shielded completely from 2 weeks before lockdown. Children were taken out of school, we all have only 1 shopping delivery every 2 weeks which is washed down/ antibacced, post quarantined etc. We are all super careful. Everyone working from home so absolutely no way for any of us to catch the virus. And if we do, frankly, there’s no hope for anyone to escape it as we are so careful. We all meet up a few times a week at my parent’s gated farm for a BBQ and for the children to play together. There is more risk for 1 family who goes out once a week to the supermarket than for us to get it even though we all meet up.

I've driven to the beach more than once and also been on a couple of drives. My mental health has taken a real kicking and I have lost my normal mental health support and need to get outside.

My DD had her friend round earlier, the friend's bf had taken an overdose and is in hospital. They stayed in the garden, one sat on the bench and another in the hammock and they drank coffee.

Covid regs were drawn up really quickly to respond to emergency (obviously) and weren't scrutinised like legislation usually is over months or years - instead it was about a week or so I think.

Hence, yes we have to abide by them but they haven't been properly thought through so interpreting exactly what they mean and why isn't always easy.

Off licences are deemed essential and can stay open 😶 (they're expressly referred to in covid regs) but household waste centres aren't - hence councils have (and for other reasons kept them closed). So people, due to being at home all the time with kids are generating more waste (caused in part by the large supermarkets which can stay open under regs) but have no where to put it. They can however travel to get a bottle of vodka to forget about the mess.

Refuse workers sit in bin lorries - sat 3 close together in cab with a mask - yes they're essential workers but then you have councils saying they won't open tips if workers don't have PPE and strict social distancing isn't enforced there with staggered entry and times.

You have ministers coming out saying if you travel to council tips you won't be fined by the police for breaching covid regs.

Police (without directly criticising the government) are issuing press statements which are like 🤷‍♀️ - change the law if you don't want us to enforce it - it's a rubbish law anyway with so much ambiguity). They're having to enforce legislation not properly thought through

"Gathering" and "exercise" haven't been defined. Does fishing count?

Then they're are conflicts with other legislation. Public must be able to physically attend council meetings (local government act) - democracy and transparency etc - but if they travelled there they could be fined under covid regs and if there were more than 2 when they arrived they couldn't stay as they could be fined. Hence regulations on remote meetings were quickly brought in.

So yes, I understand they're needed but they haven't been thought through.

Ie if you're a mobile hairdresser who travels to other peoples houses for work (and therefore it is necessary (in your opinion) for you to travel and gather for work purposes) can you continuing going to houses to do hair and not breach regs?

A few weeks back I had to take my Mum to A+E after an accident, I ignored the rules saying to drop off and go, and insisted on staying with her. Although she has full capacity she also only tells medical people what she thinks is relevant instead of properly answering questions. My priority is keeping her safe & well, so I stayed to make sure they got the full picture. TBF after I made it past the receptionist they just put me in a mask and didn't ask me to leave but it was still ignoring the rules, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

I work in a nursery so I’m climbed on, cuddled, sneezed on etc all day. Social distancing is a little irrelevant for me. However I stick to the rules out of work as I’m the person posing a risk to my family and friends if we met up.

Yes I've broken lockdown. First time mum whose baby was 6 weeks when lockdown happened. I've observed for 6 weeks feeling my MH decline and HV saying it isn't PND but lockdown blues. The suggestions to combat this were to make sure I talked to people on Zoom and have a daily walk. This week I hit my limit. For me, it was a cliff edge and I was going to either fall off or have to find a way to pull back. So my mum came over. We didn't maintain our distance. But I'm now further back from that metaphorical cliff edge after having that interaction.

I haven't but am this weekend and going to see my partner. My mental health is struggling due to last issues and I need him. 7 weeks apart with no idea of when it will change is enough. If others want to follow the rules completely that is their choice, as this is mine

I sat on a bench with DD during a long walk.
I've been out to walk more than once a day a few times (although as far as I am aware this is not actually illegal)
I have had one socially distanced walk in the park with a friend.

We have started driving to different places for our exercise. We see less people when we do this than we see when we walk out in our local village. So it’s just common sense to me. When we go out from our house our kids inevitably see their primary school friends and want to play so it makes things more difficult.

I have gone and sat in my mums garden a few times when I have brought her supplies. Kept a distance, brought my own cup of tea . She is 71 and no underlying conditions but I could feel she was starting to get depressed and it has helped her.

I browsed the make-up and bought a lipstick whilst picking up a prescription in Boots.
I also went to the local supermarket with the sole intention of buying underwear for my growing DC. I didn't buy any food.

Pants and lipstick how frivilous @spied

Even in the war women were allowed. Even encouraged, to buy lipstick 😆

fia I think you're right that the rules lend themselves to being broken as there's such a lot of conflicts and vagueness.

Bit of a tangent but it all reminded me of a teacher explaining why Phonics is the chosen way to teach children (no idea if it still is) - at the time she said it's a bit of a blunt instrument but it is the way to get those least able to be able to spell. So it's not the absolute best proven way across all ability groups, just the way that pulls the least able into being able to read to some degree.

In the same way the draconian aspects to the lockdown I reckon are a blunt instrument to stop those least able to do what they're told, whether individuals or communities from just ignoring all the rules en mass. That Professor on the news clearly made a personal assessment of risk when he opened the door to his lover, as we all do to a lesser extent each day when chosing how and where to exercise, shop, share children between split homes, support elderly relatives, support our and other people's mental health in a myriad of ways and which incrementally I can't see making much difference.

And so it begins with little tiny instances where you perceive the risk to be negligible.

And so it continues with people believing that everything is a slippery slope and that people have no ability to think for themselves.

The numbers are coming down, so clearly the minor discretions noted here are not contributing to a major increase in cases.

been out to exercise twice a day
1st bike or walk with youngest
2nd been for a run

we live in a quite part of town lot of people 70+ no one about and for my run across fields at top of my road don't come into contact with anyone.

Risk is minuscule compared with us as a family going for a walk on the prom which is 5 minutes from our house where you would be close to lots of people

The people breaking lockdown are clearly not on this thread....

The government omitted to mention conga lines it seems. I think individuals get it, small rule bending or breaking is a drop in the ocean of weeks of compliance... but put a gathering together and we can't be trusted! Or swathes of otherwise compliant people can't. Seeing some of the party footage from yesterday was mind blowing. People are intelligent but crowds are stupid.