Inequality in lockdown

[BaconandWaffles]

I see lots of threads and comments about how lockdown isn’t so bad, or that it’s actually enjoyable. Usually by posters staying at home with their partners and children, with no financial worries because their partners earn good wages and can work from home. There’s lots of “let’s all just get on with it” and “it’ll be over soon enough” and “we’re all in this together.” But we’re not all in this together, are we?

My friends who are freelance workers have no money coming in until next month and they’re panicked. Others work in hospitality and have no idea if their jobs will ever come back. I live alone and it is soul destroying - my depression was under control before this and now I have no idea if I’ll ever recover. Can all of you calling for longer lockdown and denouncing anyone who wants some restrictions lifted (some! Not pubs open or arena concerts happening!) think about why other people might be finding it difficult, and try to find some empathy? I’m sick of seeing people typing “get a grip” to posters who are struggling so much they’re suicidal. Use your imaginations and realise that for some people, catching and even dying of this virus is preferable to being locked down for months.

Blimey TabbyMumz, just think before you post, won't you?

TabbyMumz some of those positives stated apply to me. I dont go on about how easy lockdown life is for me as im aware of other peoples circumstances

What people should be praying for is for Covid to go away either by naturally dying out, or finding a vaccine or right treatment. No point wishing lockdown should just end, as long as there remains risk to the health of many and risk to lives, lockdown or some form of it will continue unfortunately.

"TabbyMumzsome of those positives stated apply to me. I dont go on about how easy lockdown life is for me as im aware of other peoples circumstances"

It very much depends on the context of the thread though doesnt it. Absolutely no problem talking about how it is for you, in a like minded conversation. If people were talking about terrible issues and you piped up his rosy your life is, it might be a bit odd. I see no problem people saying life is good, that's what diversity of life is all about.

"ChardonnaysPetDragon

BlimeyTabbyMumz, just think before you post, won't you?"

What are you referring to?

Are you telling off the posters who have lost income, who struggle at home with young children and no support, who have no outside space and who worry about their jobs just to be happy for those who are in much better position because what? We are in this together?

Yes, I'm referring to your "OMG* post.

Have some humanity.

"Chardonnay....

Are you telling off the posters who have lost income, who struggle at home with young children and no support, who have no outside space and who worry about their jobs just to be happy for those who are in much better position because what? We are in this together?"

Telling off? Er no, I was referring to this post:

"Ive seen it numerous times on here. People loving spending time with husband and dds. No financial worries and loads of outdoor space."

It's just ridiculous that people cant talk about spending happy times with their family. After all, what is this, exclusively for people in sad scenarios.
So, yes...
Omg. Absolute bast**ds arent they!? Cant you just be happy for people. In life there will be lots of people, in lots of different scenarios. Cant you have some empathy too?

I mean, the absolute audacity of it, people having families, enjoying being with them, no financial worries, gardens, etc. And then..actually have the audacity to talk about it. Absolute disgusting.

You really don't get?

then I can't help you.

Chardonnay....are you quite mad? I dont need you to help me.

Person a states how terrible it is people coming on mumsnet talking about enjoying time with their families, person b takes the micky out of that, person c thinks all kinds of weird stuff,!

I'm in the 'this isn't too bad for us' camp - I work from home too, not just my husband - neither of us are rich, we just happen to work in industries that happen to be still running - the first 2 weeks were hard with both of us adjusting to working and homeschooling 3 kids, but we adjusted.

I feel like I can really help my severely dyslexic son properly with English - he desperately needed it after a whirl of school runs and scheduled life. Things are very busy for 18 hrs of the day (working 8hrs for me, 4 hrs homeschooling, cooking), we get little sleep, the house is absolutely crying out for deep cleaning.

I know I wouldn't cope if circumstances were different during lockdown.

This lockdown is certainly bringing out some unsympathetic sides of humanity. Curtain-twitching about people in parks, telling people to get a grip/a new hobby, etc. Nothing new really.

Lockdown is terrible for a lot of people. I'm still working so have some routine - but there are people out there with no money, in a small flat with no garden and kids to look after, older people who haven't seen anyone and must be so scared and worried. It's absolute shit.

Yanbu!

Someone I know committed suicide this week. I don't know what the answer is on lockdown vs not but I do think the government is partly to blame for the lack of light at the end of the tunnel. No clear plan, just empty words. I know they don't have a crystal ball but the lack of any sort of end game is making it incredibly difficult for people who are struggling to keep going.

The govt is being very careful. They cant say lockdown will end on this date, because it might nit, then that causes even more issues, people having false hope and all that. I'm happy that they take a measured calculated approach. I'm not in the let's blame the government for everything camp. If you want to blame anything, blame Coronavirus.

Although, ironically, dh and ds2's chronic fatigue / mental health issues have been better since lockdown (I think it is they now have a legitimate reason for not going out the house & it has removed a guilt element) I can totally understand that it is extremely difficult for some people & we should not be so ready to criticize what others are doing even if we have made different choices ourselves.

Don't understand attacks on TabbyManz, are we indeed not allowed to appreciate the good aspects of the current life? Especially if when before those aspects were compelte shit?

I am one of those living in the suburbs with a garden, whf and with older children whose schools have done am absolutely amazing job teaching them remotely. I appreciate I am very lucky.

On the other hand, my "normal life" is a 3-hour commute, feeling knackered all the time, barely having time to cook and clean and barely seeing my children. That's the price I am paying for my lifestyle (which is by no means flash).

So excuse me if that hurts anyone , but my life is indeed very much easier for me in the lockdown. Including my mental health - I even came off Citalopram. And what is being discussed here is how everyone is doing - not the overall (undoubtedly horrible) impact of the pandemic on the country. So if people want empathy they should be emphatic in return.

It’s more than a little tone deaf not to understand how someone will urge those who are struggling to “OMG, be happy for those who live a lockdown life of Riley*.

By all means, have the good life life, but don’t expect everybody’s validation.

I don't see anybody urging those struggling to be happy for those "living the life of Riley".

I do however see those struggling suggesting that those who are not to "just shut up".

Not cool. We are in different boats all the time, not just during the pandemic. Acceptance and being supportive goes both ways.

Omg. Absolute bastds arent they!? Cant you just be happy for people?

Here you go.

Absolutely OP. For our family, lockdown is OK; I'm a SAHM so can focus on homeschooling and DH is able to work from home so our household income is unchanged. But it would take a total lack of imagination not to recognise our privilege and realise how much harder it is for many others.

I feel similarly when people say that all children are in the same boat with the homeschooling when they quite clearly aren't. Private school pupils are having a full schedule of online lessons. Within the state school sector, it's going to vary massively depending on people's situation. In general, those already disadvantaged will be falling further behind during lockdown and it really concerns me.

Some of us are quite enjoying lockdown (why would I lie & pretend I’m not) but still acknowledge and empathise with those who aren’t.

No-one should wish misery and misfortune on others-bitterness doesn’t make for a happy life.

Chardonnay that was sarcasm!

I'm ABSOLUTELY loving lockdown...mainly because in normal life my dh works away A LOT...right now he is home and we are all so much happier and less stressed!! I'm enjoying having an extra pair of hands and not having to do EVERYTHING myself! I am absolutely DREADING life going back to normal...I cry thinking about it. So it works the other way too OP!

There is definitely inequality in lockdown and people facing different challenges. Me and my DS enjoy being at home and reading mountains of books. But my little DD is more active and misses school. However we have a small garden which has helped her burn off energy. But what has made this so much harder is me coming down with Covid. I've been so unwell and had a short hospital admission too. I potentially could be doing all sorts of insta worthy stuff with them if I wasn't ill but instead they've had to pretty much fend for themselves and consequently the house is a tip and very little home learning is happening. There will be stark inequality when they go back to school, I think.