Autistic household here and we've never been happier!
The dc are now very settled, relaxed (we've got an extremely regular routine now!) and no meltdowns!
Dd7 was doing well at school but is now flying through work at home and is doing year 2 and year 3 work because she wants to. She is learning Spanish as a hobby! She is adamant that it is better at home and I'm starting to wonder if I'd be doing her a disservice by forcing her back. Dd was so shattered from masking at school that she would come home, not say a word to anyone, eat and then sleep.
She had a friend at school but says she doesn't miss her as she doesn't need her now, she was just to get the staff to stop bugging her to play with someone. I understand as I was also like this as a child, I genuinely do not require social interaction to be happy, quite the opposite (unless it is dh, dc or my dm, I am happy to talk to them).
Ds3 was going to nursery, non verbal and very regular meltdowns. When he was diagnosed last year they thought he was 'lower' on the ability spectrum than the rest of us (myself, Ddad and dd were also diagnosed on the nhs, dh has not been butdd's consultant pediatrician suggested he might want to be).
However after one hell of a first week of lockdown for all of us (routine changed drastically) ds has started to talk! It is still a little fuzzy but we have clearly had these words used repeatedly every day : mum, dad, car, transformer, bumblebee, optimus prime, dd's name, ds's name, venom, spiderman, cheese sandwich, please, thank you.
This is from a preciously completely non-verbal child! He never even babbled. More than that, he has turned in to such a happy little boy. He sits and draws stick figures (never so much as held a crayon before as he refused) plays with his dsis and actually sits with books now.
Seeing them now has made me question health visitors/pediatricians advice. I believe they believe in what they are saying, that we must have a lot of social interaction, go out to busy places so the dc 'get used to it' but I'm starting to think they are wrong. Some interaction with loved family members, some interaction with others when necessary like when going to playgrounds, sure.
I will have to see what happens, but if ds regresses when he goes back, and if dd goes back to not talking at all after school again I am going to have to re-think our lives. As well meaning as they are I think the experts are still trying to cram us into an neurotypical box.
As much as I like a rare few members of my family, the relief at not having unexpected drop ins is fantastic. As is having no pressure to go to social occasions, pretend to like people or having to 'mask'. I love my work but not having to do small talk is fantastic (unfortunately in the male dominated industry I chose they still bloody do it!)
rambling post there, sorry. Still trying to work through these thoughts myself.