Working a full day job at home with kids

[bombaychef]

Is it just me that is getting really hacked off with employers who expect people to be able to work a full normal day job at home (full 37 hours) whilst looking after DC at the same time. My job is flexible thankfully yet DHs job expect him to carry on as if nothing much is happening. No allowance except when the 37 hours are done. I've had to use annual leave to cover for his non key worker job..

My dh's employer is also expecting me to pick up the childcare, despite me having a job too. I'm wfh but can't do a lot with a toddler. All the fitting in has driven me to the brink and my dh has had to take unpaid leave (because they won't allow annual leave) to help me. It pushed to far and last night came to breaking point. He contacted his employer saying there has been a family emergency and he needed to take unpaid leave to care for his family and his employer said "will you be in tomorrow because we need you in" tough fucking shit. That's what you get for furloughing everyone without children and keeping the one person who is struggling with the logistics of it as working.
We can't really afford for dh to loose his job but the pressure this is has put on us and my mental health has resulted in him saying "if you don't like it then tough".

@elephantonascooter that’s terrible

No allowance except when the 37 hours are done

That is quite a lot of flexibility, if he chooses to make it work and factors in zero commuting time.

How is he using that flexibility? Is he pulling his weight or expecting you to just do all the childcare?

Don't just blame the employer, look more closely at what he is doing.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.mirror.co.uk/news/politics/coronavirus-rules-updated-you-can-21822944.amp

If you cannot manage to work and look after your DC then maybe you should consider being furloughed per the new rules announced yesterday specifically for such a situation?

We are both una fairly senior position and although job has some flexibility, we still have loads to do which means days are inevitably very busy. Not much scope to go out of office hours either as mostly it is conference calls with others.

It's been just about doable as kids are nearly all in secondary school, but it is taking a toll. I am also trying not to use annual leave as I am terrified that schools will not reopen yet we will all be expected back in offices and travelling, leaving us in an impossible situation.

I am a single parent with 2 primary aged kids that I have fulltime, trying desperately to continue working from home (don't want to be impacted long term by this and lose my contract) while home schooling, parenting and maintaining my sanity. My kids are becoming more and more feral as they see me unravel and quite honestly I'd say my biggest worry is the mental health of all 3 of us. It cannot be good for them watching me go to pieces.

Hi all thx for replies as interesting to see how people are doing it. DH works in a virtually all male environment so I do think that has an influence. They have been told 37 hours flexibly but then constant calls and conference call and urgent emails during the day. The 37 hours does not include weekend work as it has to be core midweek hours. He's starting very early and doing split days etc
He's doing some evenings. I'm managing 3/4 hours a day max on my working days, interspersed throughout the day.
I can work in eves , but working 'after kids go to bed' (8&10) isn't that simple as they aren't sleeping so bed time is more like 10-11 o'clock. They used to do hours and hours of sports and outside play so are literally bouncing off the walls as well as needy and emotional.
We are also alternating some annual leave days - but that's not sustainable for 3/6 months; anything is fine for 3 weeks, but have to get to Sept surely?

I would actually rather be furloughed on 80% pay at this point. One week in three I go to work on a rota to do work using equipment that cannot be brought home, the other two weeks are hell trying to juggle motherhood, homeworking and homeschooling.

Glad it's not just me thats finding it a living nightmare. Kids are suffering, we're all arguing a lot. Homeschooling of any format is nigh on impossible IMO. They aren't even interested in playing educational apps for more than ten mins at a time.

It is absolutely a living nightmare. My kids refuse to do anything bar netflix. They don't even want to play in the garden! I keep hearing people saying they're loving the extra time with family, they're baking, playing board games etc. HOW?!?! Feel like the world's worst parent and employee right now.

Peanutbutter: more like experience of lost I know. My kids are normally out at any opportunity between sports, Cubs, music stuff etc etc that the lack of social interaction with mates means they are lacking motivation to do much for very long and are sick of the sight of each other!! They will do some stuff if I'm with them but then I can't work.
I really don't want them on computer games all day

I'm seeing talk of schools reopening at the end of May... maybe there's a light at the end of this tunnel?

Do you expect to be paid?

If so then it’s not unreasonable for your employer to expect you to work.

At present I'd rather drop my hours and save the stress to be honest and save all our mental health