The problem with 'essential'

[YellowCorvette]

Those around me have a very different definition of what 'essential' means. Currently I'm leaving the house to exercise when it's quiet once a day and food shopping every 9-10 days, going without some stuff but I'm okay.

Yesterday my DM drove an hour and half to pick up some Ebay items from a seller. She genuinely believed it was 'essential' because she wanted the items (things for the garden).

I tried to tell her it was absolutely not essential, she was being selfish, and I actually hoped she'd get stopped by the police and fined, but she was adamant about going.

She's also going to the supermarket every day because she thinks it's 'essential' she has fresh salad every day (she'll only buy enough for the day!!!) despite me saying I'll prefer to drop off anything/everything she needs once a week.

But she keeps harping back to 'we're allowed to do what's essential, and it's essential to me'.

Should the government be a lot clearer so people like my DM understand? She really doesn't think she's flouting guidelines. It's so frustrating.

I was just in local Aldi. This woman "oh I've been to ALL the Aldis in town to look for.......a trampoline. FFS.

The number of times I go out and the things I buy are essential. The rest of youse are just being selfish and greedy.

Of course, the legislation doesn't say you can only shop for essential food.

It says "basic necessities" including "food" but no information on what types of food are allowed or disallowed.

The food itself does not need to be basic. In the wording the "food" has already been defined as a "basic necessity".

I don't think the word "essential" appears at all in that section. It appears in the travel to work section where, in order to work, the travel is essential. Again, the work itself does not need to be essential.

It's a bit of a privileged position no matter what is going on to think that fresh salad every day is a basic necessity, or essential, anyway though!!

I don't actually think it matters what you, I or the government says to some people.

Some people are either so selfish or thick they'll find any way to weasel their way around the guidelines so they work for them. You could literally argue with them till your blue in the face and it wouldn't matter.

Maybe its essential for her to keep her mental health. Gardening is a great way to pass time now during lockdown. Maybe get her into online shopping.

having garden centres open would be a good thing as people would have something to do that's not inside

NO NO because wandering round a bloody garden centre puts your life and the workers there at risk.

If you need to leave the house every day, fine, go for a walk AWAY from people, do NOT go to the shop.

And, the person who said you can't carry enough shopping. I used to when I had a baby and a toddler. I got a rucksack, and filled it up.

Salad only lasts a couple of day DON'T EAT SALAD then.

I really really don't think people
This could be life and death to someone in your family. Seriously, if your 13 year old dies of it, like the kid yesterday on the news, how important is your salad or newspaper going to seem?

You have to change what you eat, what you use, what you do. You have to change your behaviour.

If you still think that it is OK to wander to the shops for a bar of chocolate, then sorry, yes you ARE stupid.

Let's just remember that even symptomless people can have a virus and be spreading it, so no point saying if they are ill they shouldn't be out.

The lack of clear, simple language from the beginning has been a major issue.

But then Johnson isn't known for using 1 word of clarity where 50 ambiguous ones will do!

Not just on this issue but the financial and employment rules too.

People mostly can and do follow rules - when they are very clear!

We need rules like:

Only go out to buy groceries and otc medical supplies once a week (but we need the shops to facilitate this)

Collect prescriptions in one go wherever possible

Exercise at least 12 feet away from others and without touching surfaces inc gates wherever possible.

Discard shoes at the door (have slippers ready if necessary) and coats, put clothes straight into laundry, wash hands and face as directed as soon as you come in from outside.

Btw the person who gave her the garden stuff is just as irresponsible as her!

I'm on several local Facebook pages which are normally very much used like gumtree/freecycle yet as soon as the restrictions were even mentioned the admins put a stop to selling/giveaways/collections and posters who came on without reading the info who tried to do so were roundly criticised for doing so and told not to be part of the problem. A couple were bloody minded about it and got absolutely flamed! It's a very small town and it won't be forgotten - one was quite amusing as his sister came on to tell him off because such actions would put his elderly parents who he lives with at risk! Idiot!

@Lolly49 I think most people would accept replacing a much used and needed piece of standard kitchen equipment as essential

@Drivemybluecar Keeping cars and other vehicles clean is a safety and maintenance issue so yes I would consider that essential particularly for key workers.

@okiedokieme Salad NOT essential there are many other foods and ingredients which last longer

Maybe its essential for her to keep her mental health. Gardening is a great way to pass time now during lockdown. Maybe get her into online shopping.

Maybe people need to see the patients on ventilators in hospital, who can't have their families around them when they die?

And, the person who said you can't carry enough shopping. I used to when I had a baby and a toddler. I got a rucksack, and filled it up.

I said some people eg a family of 5 with a child/ren in nappies and a pet, but without a car might need to shop more than once a week. That is a reasonable and practical solution. Even with a rucksack and bags there may be a combination I'd heavy and/or bulky items that make this not possible. That's not an excuse, but I'm just saying it's not one size fits all.

Also in a quandary whether better to go to a large supermarket and be potentially in contact with a large number of people, or make 2 or 3 visits to small shops with less than 3 people in them.

For info we did 1 large supermarket shop on thursday, and are going again tomorrow

Even large supermarkets are only letting in so many people at a time. There was a queue outside Morrisons today. So I don't think you would be in contact with a large number of people, and in a bigger shop you can do social distancing much better once inside.

Also I think (but could be wrong) that supermarkets may be more strict or have more mitigation policies ie marking out the floor, wiping trellises and baskets before use etc (which small corner shops may not have the man- power/resources to do)

Trellises = trollies!

For any food item people can come on and say x isn't essential. I'd be really curious to know what is essential.

Collect prescriptions in one go wherever possible

Well you think that is a good idea, I think it is a good idea, but dh dropped my prescription in for the pill along with his prescription. I put a note on to say that whilst it was a little early because of the risk of the need to self isolate could it still be done.

But no, so dh queued for his (twice) and will have to go back and queue for mine as they refused to dispense it a couple of weeks early, Seriously what am I going to do with an extra pill packet.

I think the word essential is very subjective and eschewed atm well

People saying that a tv isn't essential but when you're stuck inside with nothing to do. Then a cheap one from the supermarket I'd say is actually.

there was a fella who definitely needed a good wash carrying a large crate of cider

Perhaps he was an alcoholic. It's really dangerous for those dependent on alcohol to go cold turkey, it can actually kill and on that basis, I'd say an off-licence is essential. Plus many of them do elec/gas/phone top ups too.

I went in a small Sainsbury's Local yesterday, the checkout lady actually thanked me for buying a basket full of essentials. She said she's fed up of people going in just to buy a newspaper or can of pop, the same people oblivious to the marked space on the floor.

My basket of essentials was about £30, I wouldn't class it all as essentials to be honest. Bread, curry sauce, milk, cheese, rice, ketchup, ground almonds, coleslaw, cream, Pringles, trifles

None of that is essential if you had other food.
Why did I go out the other day for bread, milk, pasta, lentils, chicken, mince? I had baked beans in the cupboard and banana bread in the freezer.

@TheGreatWave I agree the lack of flexibility and common sense applied in some places/situations is ridiculous. Totally makes sense to try and group a households prescriptions into as few collections as possible.

On another thread a poster said to posters worried about not being able to get contraceptive injections to consider and that surgeries may "encourage" a switch to pop.

1 there's been issues in recent months with manufacture of pop so those of us already on that don't need supply to be affected especially when we're on for medical reasons and alternatives don't work.

2 annoyed at myself for not considering this straight away, but quite a few women on depo may be in abusive situations and this is the only way they can secretly protect themselves from an unwanted pregnancy

3 those on depo for medical reasons may well not find pop suitable.

The issue of being on hormones for medical reasons isn't just a selfish/personal one either, if those of us on those treatments are switched to others that are not/less suitable that could put more pressure on nhs.

@NewYearNewJob123 I am sorry that this time is proving so difficult for you. We are naturally social animals so this period is proving very difficult for lots of people, so it is no surprise you are craving some human interaction at this time.

Mind UK has some good resources and they also have an online support group if you feel you need a bit more. Please seek help if you need it, services are still there to provide support.

re garden centres.........i think the government might be relaxing on this

check back on friday!!

Too much focus on 'essential' and not enough on 'as infrequently as possible'.

I don't give a shit what people are buying but it grates to see people popping in to buy odd items here and there, especially when they bring the whole family because daily exercise!, when I don't have the option of staying at home.

Lottery and scratchcards are non-essential and it's quite unhygienic for shop staff to handle the winning tickets and cards brought back into store. I work in a convenience store and I really hope they will suspend sales of lottery and scratch cards like B&M stores.

People won't go out everyday for wine and chocolate. Even buying a TV is a one off. It's the ones buying newspapers everyday that are making unnecessary trips.

If they are allowed that I should be allowed a weekly overnight visit to my fella who lives 18 miles away.