Parents - so torn WWYD?

[teawamutu]

They're both in their mid-60s, fit and healthy, no underlying conditions. Have stopped all social activities, although are going for walks, to shops to buy the needful etc.

I'm the only local sibling and they're desperately missing their other children and GC.

We'd planned last week just to get together today, have coffee and cake and maybe a walk.
No hugs, just being in the same room for a bit.

Would you do this? I don't want to overreact OR underreact.

Nope that’s exactly what you’re not supposed to do.

Why take the risk

They can ring, write letters, FaceTime.

No, sorry. That's not social distancing. I know it's hard but Skype or facetime is the best option right now.

The virus is airborne right? So being in the same room is still dangerous.

It's really hard, but no, definitely not. You need to stay away from people you don't live with.

Yeah, being in the same room is pretty bad. Isn't one of the ways of getting it that you're in the same room for 15 minutes?

Sorry OP it sounds like a no :( :( And i know how hard it is.

OP, you have been told - what part of No is not making sense?

I know it is hard. But honestly the virus does not care that ‘they are missing their children and GC’. Do the right thing.

Please don't. Some people have to have contact with others, such as HCPs, staff working in schools next week, staff working in supermarkets. The rest of us who don't have to have contact, shouldn't. It's so so hard, I'm missing my DDs and grandson terribly, and wont get to see them for weeks probably, but it's so important that we maintain social distancing.
What you could do is drive to your parents, sit in their garden whilst they sit at an open window, and chat.

You've confirmed what I knew really. I think I'm being a coward because I don't want to pull the plug on it, I know how much it will upset mum in particular.

Would a walk while maintaining distance be a Plan B? If not I will go for facetime.

No I wouldn't do it. It's very difficult I know, but this is unnecessary social contact. Certainly wouldn't be indoors in the same room as them. I read an article last night about a family in the USA who met up and went for a celebratory dinner in a restaurant together. I think it said 7 members of the family have now got CV and 3 of them have died.

I went for a walk with my dad (69, super well) yesterday. We did 6 lovely miles together, chatted, enjoyed the spring. No close contact.

All being well I may do similar in a few weeks. Or I may not. Listening closely to advice.

No

I think a walk at an appropriate distance would be ok. I have a nearly 90 year old mother and am facing the same decision. Her supermarket delivery yesterday lacked 10 essential items for which there was no substitute, so I bought these things, took them to her and put them on her doorstep, maintained a six feet distance when she opened the door and talked for five minutes. I wore surgical gloves to handle her shopping.

I took my mum's card round yesterday and we had a conversation in her garden at some distance while the kids waved from the car window. My parents live in the middle of nowhere and have a huge garden which helps. PIL I just put the cards thro their letterbox.

Go for facetime - We are not supposed to be doing any non essential contact.

Just go for FaceTime.

WTF. Those people in Italy get taken away in an ambulance and... that’s it. They die alone. Is it worth the walk?

Just don't it's horrible but nothing else you can do .

FaceTime them or call them. Leave a present on their doorstep.

Persona, I'm trying to work out what the right thing is and then do it. I'm taking everything on board. Your tone is aggressive and unhelpful.

I was having the same dilemma. Parents fit and healthy, and I’ve not been anywhere since I last saw them apart from to the shops once for 5 minutes, ran in and out, sanitised hands on entry and exit.
I was going to pop over and stay on the other side of the room but now I feel it’s not sensible or worth the risk. I would never forgive myself if I did somehow make them ill. As it’s sunny I think I will have a chat in the front garden - at a distance (over 6ft). Luckily they have a big front garden so should be easy to stay far away.

Don't be with them, if you have a car and want to take something you can leave it on the doorstep or in porch and talk through the window.

Agree. And it's not just parents, is it? It's everyone else.

NHS111 advice on social distancing:

“Avoid large and small gatherings in public spaces, noting that pubs, restaurants, leisure centres and similar venues are currently shut as infections spread easily in closed spaces where people gather together.”

“Avoid gatherings with friends and family. Keep in touch using remote technology such as phone, internet, and social media“

‘Everyone should be trying to follow these measures as much as is practicable.

‘We strongly advise you to follow the above measures as much as you can and to significantly limit your face-to-face interaction with friends and family if possible‘

How are people still asking this question?!

I have no words! It’s VERY clear what you’re meant to do and not meant to do now.

Why are people STILL asking!?

My tone is ‘unhelpful’?

No. Really. This is an actual matter of life and death. Patronise elsewhere.