To resent parents who are still sending their kids to school on Monday

[letmeinthroughyourwindow]

Not the genuine cases, obviously.

But I'm a teacher and we will be opening for the duration because 40% of our pupils have at least one parent who is a keyworker.

Before the list was released, the government told us to expect 10% and we planned accordingly. In fact, we planned for 20%.

When the list was released, it was so broad that far more parents than we ever expected fell into one of the categories.

Now, if your need is genuine then of course I want to care for your child. I'm happy to do it, and proud that doing so keeps you working.

But we have so many parents who are allowed to send their child to school, but shouldn't be, that it's infuriating me.

If you are a keyworker but your partner is a stay-at-home parent should you be sending them in?

If you are a keyworker but your partner works from home or is allowed to work from home indefinitely, should you be sending them in?

My sister's employer is allowing all employees who are parents to work from home on full pay, but many are saying that they don't need to, because their partner is a keyworker so their kids can still go to school

Just because you can send them, doesn't mean you should. It shouldn't be the best or easiest option for you, it should be a last resort if there is nowhere else to keep them safe.

The number one, most critical piece of advice for keyworker parents is, 'if it is at all possible for children to be kept at home then they should be.'

Please don't think I'm lazy and cba babysitting these children. I cried when my class went home yesterday, and care about every child in school. If I am in work full time anyway, then it really doesn't matter how many children are in the classroom.

But so many people don't understand social distancing. They are walking around like they are immortal, or only thinking that they themselves will probably be ok if they get it. For social distancing to have the desired effect, then everyone who can be at home, should be. If there was a chance of your child dying from this, would you send them to school? Well then think about who might die because they came into contact with your child.

And all of this brought on by a friend who called me last night to say that she is thrilled to be able to send her child to school on Monday because she is a deliveroo driver, even though her unemployed bf will be home all day on the PlayStation.

I’m technically a key worker as I work in logistics. My DH isn’t. Nursery rang on Friday to say we could still send DS in (both DH and I can work from home) and then, someone else phoned me from the nursery (who didn’t realise I’d already been contacted) called me to say ‘ah we have enough staff in to cover your son too if you want to send him in’ - she didn’t realise that I was classed as a key worker. I bet they have called around most of the parents to tell them they can still send their DC in.
The ridiculous thing is, we already said we would still pay them if we have to keep DS at home - so there was really no need. I found it quite worrying.

Goes without saying that we are keeping him at home.

No, I listen to them, build them up, offer them some respite, give them some tools, give them seven hours a day where they’re safe, limit the time when they’re not... bloody hell.

Anyone else picturing this for Important Husband up-thread?

It’s been a pleasure to see that clip hauled out again. Never gets old.

Yes you are quite right. Who would not want to protect their child by isolating? Unfortunately, as with the pubs and clubs many people are in denial and wont do things unless they have to. It is a mentality thtat has been increasingly apparent in the last 50 years. Many people think this virus will not directly affect them so are happy to carry on spreading it around

1066Vegan, Your school is intending to run academic lessons?! That's NOT what we've been advised. That will lead to further inequality and demands for more children to attend for fear of "missing out." (There's already another thread on this).
Schools are open for limited childcare for emergency cases. We are meant to be providing a safe environment with fun activities, a bit like a holiday playscheme, and give time for them to cover their Home Learning pack work.
You start running lessons and there will be a whole heap of trouble to follow.

@recreationalcalpol if you have to do telephone court cases then let the toddler disrupt them. Better that than risk all your familys lives.

Ppl will understand that it's not always possible to maintain professionalism what with there being a global pandemic.

Honestly what are your priorities? Life and death or keeping up your professional image? (And most ppl grow out of that nonsense anyway)

And that’s practical with ten kids in, jane

Great post @Lifeisgenerallyfun
You should make that public.
Rights and responsibilities, and needs and wants, and luxuries are almost constantly confused in the society we now Iive in. These new restrictions will hopefully make these differences clearer, to some at least.

I'm a lone parent key worker (also teacher) bit I will be WFH and keeping DD home with me even though she technically could go to her own school which is 5 minutes walk away. I can be in my own school on a rota system, were averaging one day a week for each staff member at the moment but everything I need to do can be done from home so no need to use DDs school as last resort childcare.
I think for some, a sense of entitlement is overriding the fact that we are in the midst of a national crisis and the sooner everybody does their bit to help, even if it is just staying home as much as possible, then the sooner we overcome it.

We won't be using our 'key worker' place at school. We applied because of the rush to register, just a few hours to respond in our case and honestly didn't think it through (in our defence we're self-isolating and are all ill with cold-like symptoms). We have no idea how the school plan to socially distance pupils and staff (and of course I'm sure they will be trying their best, no judgment on them, but it's a primary school and DS is 5yo!!) and with front line workers not always having access to correct PPE, it's a massive risk having all those the children together.

I might not have a terribly important role, but I will definitely still be holding conference calls whilst looking after my 2 year old. Getting work done while he naps and after he has gone to bed if needs be, DH is doing the same. We have to try and adapt. The sooner people get their heads around that, the sooner we can all go back to normal!

OP, a fair point you make: "We don't mind being in work. We are proud to be looking after children of keyworkers and vulnerable children. We are happy to play our part. But we are concerned that high numbers of children who are unnecessarily attending will dilute the effectiveness of social distancing."

Agree with that. It's really hard (like everything is at the moment, seeing as our society as we know it in every area has changed/been thrown into question).

It's just that there is a fine balance and so many variables. Of course a lazy fecker who just doesn't want their kids at home shouldn't be sending them in. On the other hand, there are the definite priorities but then there are people who are more grey areas but still contribute valuably to the running of society. (ie not just "luxury" industries).

Eg Plumbers - an outer layer of utilities. Yes, of course somebody's luxury bathroom conversion can wait (indefinitely!) but raw sewage from a broken soil stack or a problem with the house's cold water supply, not so much. There hasn't been the time to make all the differentiations between groups, or band together to ensure the provision of a service for acute problems (eg toilet sewage) but doing without the elective element (eg new bathroom installation).

I guess it's hard all round and we've all had to consider or confront many life-changing elements in one go, in a very short space of time. Health, loss of jobs, loss of finances, food supply scares, social isolation, the heightened death rates of loved ones in the defined vulnerable group... I have had to worry about the possibility of people not having anything to eat in the months or years to come, depending on how much the virus ravages supply chain workers, factory workers, farm workers or raw ingredient production workers - I don't just mean not being able to get twirly pasta or a certain type of chocolate... I mean obviously, let's hope it doesn't come to that but the fact it has been a serious thought more than once is all kinds of wrong and worrying.

There is simply no way that I could conduct a telephone hearing with a toddler around. It just wouldn’t work

Yes you can. You just haven’t tried. It won’t be ideal but that’s life presently.

And your v important husband could wrangle them whilst you were doing the call

Yabu tbh. If the government have said they are key workers it's not really for us to judge. Also if they want to send their kids in because they cant be bothered to look after them then to be honest those children are probably better off being looked after by school than neglected at home.

Just a question to everyone piling on saying people should take unpaid leave... what happens after 4 weeks? That’s the maximum entitlement in a year isn’t it? And 18 in total? What happens if, as seems likely, the schools don’t go back till September? So one parent is a key worker and has to work. The other can do a max of 4 weeks (which must be taken in blocks) plus a couple of weeks of annual leave. Will the rules change?

There is simply no way that I could conduct a telephone hearing with a toddler around. It just wouldn’t work

Also, you need a rota.

DH and I sit down every evening and work out who’s need for uninterrupted time is more pressing. Divvy that time out.

The work into the early hours when the kids are in bed.

Also if they want to send their kids in because they cant be bothered to look after them then to be honest those children are probably better off being looked after by school than neglected at home.

They would at least be virus free. That is the point right now. What is not getting through to people!?

Gosh, some people really do hate teachers I read one comment about teachers sitting having extra holidays fully paid while simultaneously blaming them for bringing it into the country after their jollies on Italian ski trips.

As well as supervising the children of key workers, we are simultaneously setting daily work and sending uplifting messages and videos to our children who are at home. We have asked for photos of what they are up to and are open to questions and parent contact all day.

If we are not at school for any reason, we are still setting that daily work, still interacting with children and parents AND educating and supervising our own children.

We are all doing our best. Please be kind.

And bare in mind that if we do work through the Easter holidays, there has been no mention of pay whereas NHS staff and other workers are rightly getting overtime (sorry if this is not you but all the NHS workers I know personally are).

If the government have said they are key workers it's not really for us to judge

Yes it is for people to judge if they really need this help. We have responsibilities to our children and each other. Too many people think they only have rights.

The rules around unpaid leave will change if need be. There’s a significant chance a lot of people will not be needed at work anyway. The new government salary pledge acknowledges that.

These are not normal times. All bets are off. Stop pretending that rules won’t change. They will if needed.

Lifeisgenerallyfun

This should be what we live by as a country. You are so right. I am fed up of hearing people complaining because an aspect life has changed:

Their child can't have an end of term celebration
Their child can't go to a friend's house
Their child is going to miss a concert
They won't be able to go to the gym
Why should they work when others are at home?
That they have not been classified as an essential worker and being a nail technician/ tattoo artist/Joules designer is essential
Their child's favourite Japanese restaurant is closed

We ned to get a grip and help the people who are really struggling by all doing the right things and being generous and thoughtful to people who are going to need help.

I think the government needs to consider some things such as:
Richard Branson, Philip Green, James Dyson, Tim Martin and the likes being made to spend a large chunk of their wealth paying their staff wages BEFORE the government step in. They are billionaires and sitting back allowing the government to protect their billions by paying their staff.

Landlord to give people rent breaks - if you have lost your job or been laid off- a rent break for as long as the crisis lasts or a rent reduction at least.

Re-deploying people into key services - hospitals will need many more support staff, supermarkets, delivery drivers, factories producing personal protection products, social care.

Yanbu
Thank you to all teachers who are making this possible!
Both Dh and I are keyworkers education and vicar. But some days Dh can work from home. Some days I can. I was very grateful the school said ds can go in on days when I'm taking funerals AND Dh has to work. But in the main they will be staying at home.

If the government have said they are key workers it's not really for us to judge.

I totally disagree.

The government probably has to err on the of caution here and cast the net wide.

Individuals should be looking at their circumstances and acting responsibly within that. We all have a duty to do what we can to fight this.

That’s exactly what I’m trying to say chloe

My husband is a key worker (farmer) I have the flexibility to work from home so have taken the decision everyone is better off if he stays home and isolates/social distances with me. In my mind "keyworkers" should be much less broad and if one parent is able to stay home to look after children, that should be the preference.

I think so many people have misunderstood the most important piece of guidance.

If at all possible children must be cared for AT HOME.

This is so important for social distancing. Yes it's difficult, yes it's a pain, yes it's hard to wfh and home educate BUT we all have to play our part.

ICU nurses aren't saying oh it's a bit hard at work think I'll have a break.

YADNBU