To resent parents who are still sending their kids to school on Monday

[letmeinthroughyourwindow]

Not the genuine cases, obviously.

But I'm a teacher and we will be opening for the duration because 40% of our pupils have at least one parent who is a keyworker.

Before the list was released, the government told us to expect 10% and we planned accordingly. In fact, we planned for 20%.

When the list was released, it was so broad that far more parents than we ever expected fell into one of the categories.

Now, if your need is genuine then of course I want to care for your child. I'm happy to do it, and proud that doing so keeps you working.

But we have so many parents who are allowed to send their child to school, but shouldn't be, that it's infuriating me.

If you are a keyworker but your partner is a stay-at-home parent should you be sending them in?

If you are a keyworker but your partner works from home or is allowed to work from home indefinitely, should you be sending them in?

My sister's employer is allowing all employees who are parents to work from home on full pay, but many are saying that they don't need to, because their partner is a keyworker so their kids can still go to school

Just because you can send them, doesn't mean you should. It shouldn't be the best or easiest option for you, it should be a last resort if there is nowhere else to keep them safe.

The number one, most critical piece of advice for keyworker parents is, 'if it is at all possible for children to be kept at home then they should be.'

Please don't think I'm lazy and cba babysitting these children. I cried when my class went home yesterday, and care about every child in school. If I am in work full time anyway, then it really doesn't matter how many children are in the classroom.

But so many people don't understand social distancing. They are walking around like they are immortal, or only thinking that they themselves will probably be ok if they get it. For social distancing to have the desired effect, then everyone who can be at home, should be. If there was a chance of your child dying from this, would you send them to school? Well then think about who might die because they came into contact with your child.

And all of this brought on by a friend who called me last night to say that she is thrilled to be able to send her child to school on Monday because she is a deliveroo driver, even though her unemployed bf will be home all day on the PlayStation.

"Stay inside people as much as possible, and that includes all those still going out visiting friends, running unnecessary errands etc."

I couldn't agree more. My social media last night was full of people on nights out 'for the last time' and planning isolation parties because they'll go stir crazy if they can't get out to see their friends.

It's unbelievable, it really is. I can only assume it's people who aren't closely watching developments, or have no idea how bad it is in Italy.

The better we self isolate now, the shorter the duration.

Unfortunately, it will not just be these idiots suffering.

The deputy head of our local school is literally phoning every parent and checking the cases are genuine. Your school should do the same OP.

My Dh is a key worker and I’m also a key worker but I work part time. Both my dds will be in school and nursery but only for the time I am at work. Our school was also very clear that it is emergency childcare and not to be used if you are working from home or have another option.

We have no family help whatsoever and my role involves answering phone calls to the public which is impossible to do at home with a 2 and 6 year old underfoot so we have no choice but to send them but for the minimum amount of time to limit their exposure.

The list is very clear that children should only be going to school if there is no alternative

I expect there will be a crackdown very quickly. The aim is to get the bulk of schools closed and have the small number of kids having to go into one or two schools locally. That won’t happen if there is too many so there will be a quick down push on numbers

I have two children with special needs (autism and adhd) and their school has said that they can go in (echps) at first I was 'absolutely not' but this change In routine is already affecting my eldest (10) he has started soiling and the school has said his behaviour has changed dramatically this week.

So here is my dilemma, because I want them to be at home; but I am so scared of how it will effect him and his brother -

I just don't know what to do for the best

My employer is insisting that I am a key worker but I am not so sure. I work in childrens services for the local authority. Some of the work I do is vital but other bits not. I could probably do most of the important stuff at night when my daughter is in bed. Does anyone know what the rules are? Who decides what counts as vital and what if school don't agree?

The problem with specifing that both parents have to be key workers is that it will disadvantage women whose partners won't provide childcare and it will put children at risk.

During every school holiday, those children who live in neglectful/DV/DA etc, suffer more. On top of their usual situation, there's, job fears, money worries, health fears, with no distractions such as sport.

It's predicted that cases of DV will rise, as they do over every holiday. There's going to be more drinking at home etc.

There's a fair few threads from women suddenly realising how bad their marriages are and what arses their partners really are, now that we have got a crisis going on.

On the face of it, my DD doesn't have to send her DD in, because i provide childcare. But I'm in the high risk group and this has brought on anxiety. I need the break.

Total agree with you.

Me and DH are both key workers, but surprised as our organisations are but wouldn’t say our individual roles are, but that’s another thread.

We’ve let schools know, but we will keep them at home for now as we can work from home, and manage somehow but flagged it to school as risk we may have to do different roles and wouldn’t be able to do these from home.

I'm not sure how schools are saying both parents must be key workers. The guidelines say that only one parent needs to be a key worker so are you refusing to take children unless both are key workers? I am a teacher so will be in school next week and will probably have to take my children with me. So I know how frustrating it is and we have got more children than we had initially planned for. But our head said schools should not be saying both parents have to be key workers.

Please don't presume you know or understand anybody's circumstances - glasshouses and all that.

If you are a keyworker but your partner is a stay-at-home parent should you be sending them in?

When SAHP has their own health condition and can just about manage to look after their child for 3-4 days so long as that's followed by a long rest (e.g. Easter when it's 4 days childcare / 4 day rest / 4 day childcare) and longer school holidays are carefully managed ...

If you are a keyworker but your partner works from home or is allowed to work from home indefinitely, should you be sending them in?

Ever tried to WFH with a demanding toddler? Or with a child with ASD or ADHD? Not every child can happily occupy themselves. WFH is non-productive under such circumstances, you may as well not work.

YNBU A friend told me her husband was so glad he could send their daughter to nursery so she could keep her routine He's a teacher but she works very part time has had her hours cut and they have NO actual need for childcare. Blew my mind.

I think your head isn’t applying the recommendations well. The key principle is if a child can stay at home they should. The head needs to make some tough decisions. The one parent rule is to prevent a key worker staying home because their partner earns more. Not to prop up SAHP.

DH sand I date both keyworkers, we have no option but to send DS to nursery, if one of us could work from home we would and wouldn't send him

It doesn't make any sense if there's a parent at home who can look after the kids

@binkyblinky school wont be school as he knows it, and he will be safer at home. My school have been very clear it will be childcare, and that it will only run for as long as they can staff it.

I'm a keyworker, for now I have alternative childcare so she's staying at home. If that changes she will have to go in but I really don't want her too.

I get you. I'm a secondary teacher and our council have made it very clear that parents must only send their children if their is absolutely no alternative. They have also stated that both parents must be key workers on their application document. I know this goes against government advice but I think they are trying to reduce numbers as much as possible.

How are people going to work from home at the same time as look after/educate their children? I don’t understand how that’s possible. I’m a key worker but can’t send children to school as husband is wfh. But he spends half his day on video conference calls / meetings. Children are 5 & 3.

YANBU. That's a disgrace that an unemployed father can't look after the kids.

However it's not always so black and white. What about night shift workers in NHS / emergency services who need to sleep in the day? I don't begrudge them having the kids out of the house to make that possible. It'll result in keeping more people safe when they get a solid night sleep. And yes I'm sure people will say keep the kids quiet but we all know how hard that is!!!!

Child with an ehcp here in mainstream who could go to school. Dc is staying home because I’m working from home. It’ll be tricky as I’ll have three kids - two with Sen at home but it’s the safest place for us all.

YABU please keep these thoughts to yourself in real life.

You still have a role to play in safeguarding vulnerable children. You have no idea what going on behind closed door. I bet after this is all over, there will be a high rise in domestic abuse and child abuse.

I will be sending my child in as I am a key worker. I am encouraging other key workers to do the same. Teachers must play their part. Stop moaning, all I seen is teachers moaning since this has started.

I know a couple of people sending their kids in when they could be kept home and it makes me so angry.

I've got a four week old and we timed this pregnancy so that my eldest would be at primary school and I could have time with the new baby. My husband is a key worker and so in theory we could keep her school place but as I'm at home on maternity leave there is no way I would send her to school so she'll be home with me.

Some people just don't care that the government advice is that children should be cared for at home if possible. They are just selfish and out for what they can get.

I am a key worker (teacher) and have two children. I could send them to school but DH is working from home so will not. It is not ideal as DH has got to work but we will get round it.
However lots of unemployed parents who have children with ehcps are still sending their children to our school on Monday as they don’t want them at home. Lot’s of other parents clamouring to get their children in to school. Do they not get social distancing?
I’m terrified about what i’m going to catch and bring back to my own family who are doing the right thing.

Our school has a much shorter list of what is a key worker than what the government has advised and also both parents have to be on it. I had a nurse moaning about this on Facebook! Surely she should know there is good reason for this 🤯

"So here is my dilemma, because I want them to be at home; but I am so scared of how it will effect him and his brother."

Is there an adult who can be at home to care for them? Well then that is where they should be.

Schools are no longer educating. We are babysitting those children who have literally nowhere else to go.

I know you are worried but this is life and death stuff. You don't have an entitlement to attend just because of an EHCP, that is one of the groups who can attend if there is no alternative.

If he's unsettled at home, imagine how he would fare at school. Different teachers on a rota, no familiar keyworker, no routine, no lessons.

YANBU. It seems like only 4 kids aren’t going in at this rate. I could TECHNICALLY be classed as a key worker but it was be CF for me to do so (think not NHS but works alongside and falls into the bracket but is absolutely NOT needed).

I’m a single mother who works full time but I know it’s CF for me to send my baby to nursery as while I can claim key worker status I know really it isn’t designed for me and it’s a technicality.

people need to check themselves.