To be bloody scared!

[Whenisithometime]

Hi

More a ‘am I being silly’ thread tbh.

But, this virus is really starting to scare me. All the shops and restaurants around me are starting to close one by one, it’ll not be long until they are all closed.

Life just seems so weird at the minute, it’s good to stay positive but this is horrendous.

DS’ college has closed indefinitely and he is worried about how he will get his exams if he can’t sit them this summer. It’s hard to see him so stressed over it as he’s worried he’ll have to go back a year or whatever.

Does anyone feel the same way?

And no I am not a panic buyer 🤣🤣

I’m scared too OP I think it’s natural. We are in uncharted territory and our way of life is going t change massively who knows for how long.

I’ve become a bit of a prepper in the run up to Brexit so haven’t had to panic buy and am doing what I can to help elderly neighbours as I have extra but I’m really concerned about vulnerable people, young families etc who are short on essentials for themselves and their children

Yanbu. I'm scared too but there's not much we can do except follow advice re hand washing, isolation and social distancing.

My finances are going to be totally wiped out and I'm worried about dc's education.

I get it, OP. DH has symptoms as of yesterday, GP thinks he has it but nit testing, and we are all having to isolate for 14 days. I am scared as DH is very poorly, nothing mild about what he is suffering from. The shops are selling out of basic goods, businesses affected, very scary.

Try not to let the anxiousness take over, deep breaths and keep positive. I will be attacking my garden and trying to create a bit of paradise.

I agree - it is such an unsettling time. I think I am still in a state of shock about how this has all occurred really- who would have thought in 2020 the world would shut down?!
I'm struggling with the idea that my parents (and in laws) won't get to see their granddaughter for her first birthday . . . It is just rubbish . . . BUT we can deal with it. It is a very first world problem compared to the poor people who are getting seriously Ill.
I think we just have to make the best of it - my mission is to get my house so clean and organised that Kim, Aggie, Mrs Hinch and (apparently) Stacey Solomon would be proud haha.
As a teacher, I entirely sympathise with your son. I teach GCSE and A Level and (entirely selfishly) I feel like 2 years dragging them kicking and screaming through Macbeth has been a waste of time. I imagine grades will go on a combination of predicted grades and mock grades, but we have no idea at the moment. I do believe children will get their grades etc but for those kids that can 'pull it out of the bag' on the day - those are the ones that will suffer.
We will all look back on this time in a few months with gratitude that it is over, until then - Netflix/ read/ play with kids etc.

Just heard that the mother of a close friend who has COPD is in intensive care. Shit just got very, very real.

Fight or flight mode. Stay calm.. Watch positivity videos and remember everything will be ok.

Me too. I just can't help myself.

I’m the same, I’m bloody terrified. Here in Ireland the kids have been off a week now, thankfully they are behaving and haven’t driven me mad yet.
I have asthma and my daughter is diabetic. I am so scared of what will happen if either of us get it. We’ve been keeping away from everyone. We’ve been going for walks but if anyone comes towards us we cross the road. It is so scary.

@SparklesAllOver so sorry to hear that, is he having breathing difficulties? I hope he’s on the mend soon and the rest of you don’t get it

I'm terrified. I didn't realise how terrified I was until my DD messaged me last night to tell me she had a bad headache and felt really unwell. She had her spleen removed recently and is still on steroids to reduce her immune system. I burst into tears as it hit me.

She's a teacher so is still working, although is staying off today. We don't think it's viral. Most likely stress as they're under immense pressure and her personal vulnerability doesn't help. But my god, the fear!

I'm terrified. I cope really badly with change at the best of times and this uncertainty is awful. I feel sort of bereft, like I'm mourning our old world, but I need to keep it together for DH, the kids and our elderly parents. I keep telling myself one day this will all be a hideous memory; I just wish I knew when that one day will be.

I've been keeping it together so far. I have a 1 year old and I have an autoimmune disease. A few nights ago for no reason I burst out crying at the thought that if myself or my partner died - how would the other cope? Or God forbid if we both died, what would happen to my baby that we spent two years trying to conceive, and that I adore and love more than life itself. Would she grow up not remembering who I am, and how much I absolutely cherished every single second I spent with her?

It's such a scary time for everyone and my heart is breaking

I'm scared too. I'm a supply teacher and I'm not sure if I'll still have a job when it's all blown over and we're already only just keeping our heads above the water as it is.

It’s natural to be scared. Life has turned on it’s head, most people value consistency and predictability. People like to feel in control. Recognise why you feel frightened, think about whether you can do anything about any of it. If you can’t try and put that worry to one side, deal with the things you can influence (which is probably v little) and put all your energies into that.

Life ebbs and flows, usually we have small tides, we are currently riding one of the biggest high tides we are likely to see, but remember the water will go back out again. If you just go with the flow of the tide, you’ll likely float although not necessarily end up at the destination you were envisioning.

Try and swim against the tide, fixated on where you wanted to go, you will probably get knackered and sink.

The next few months are about keeping your head above the water, not about enjoying the scenery.

Everything in life is temporary, change is the only constant. This will all work out in the end.

I don’t know anyone who isn’t scared, disorientated and wondering how the hell this is all going to pan out. You are certainly not alone OP. That doesn’t make it easier to handle I know but you’d have to be an idiot to not be concerned I think. I’m not an anxious person and am laid back and calm but I have had spells of rapid heartbeat and feelings of real fear over the last few days.

Try to limit updating yourself on the latest news to once a day. Watch as much comfort tv as possible. If you can get out for walks then I’d do that and encourage your DS to do the same. Deep breaths and take it one day at a time.

It is scary and the guidelines about schools are not clear , on one hand I'm told my child is high risk as he has learning disabilities but on another vulnerable children with and EHCP can still go into school ? As at a special school with a full EHCP so who knows .

I’m much better than I was. I was worried but I’ve given myself a good talking to (helped massively by reading what other people are facing) and realised just how selfish I was being and how bloody lucky I am.

We’ll be fine for everything. The only thing I care about now are that my loved ones (many of whom are in really vulnerable groups) stay alive.

Of course yanbu, OP. These are uncharted waters. The uncertainty is terrifying - jobs, health, even something as simple as buying a bag of pasta was two weeks ago. From the huge things to the most mundane, everything is on its head.

There's this weird feeling of limbo at the moment. It's a beautiful day but I can't go out. DH is currently on a conference call on the living room because he's wfh, so I'm hiding out in the bedroom. There are council workmen outside digging up the pavement and kids going to school. But the buses and schools are closing down as are the shops in town, one by one. It feels like the in-between bit where the last shreds of normality are winding down.

It won't be forever though, even if it's for a long time. Hopefully this time next year we'll be out in the spring sunshine. Even in a few months, we'll probably be able to enjoy summer stuff. And I won't take any of it for granted ever again. I can't believe how much I did take for granted before all this.

Its natural to feel scared and completely understand why many people are. Most people here havent experienced such a situation and the concern for themselves and loved ones is very valid. I am not scared but that is just me, I do see how and why others are though.

Every morning feels like a bad dream that I can't wake up from. We have no food and it's all my fault because I refused to buy any extra than we needed, I don't know what I will be able to find when I go to the shops today.
I have been positive but after being at home for days with my oh who has bad health anxiety and being upbeat for him, it's bogging me down today. He constantly needs reassured and is convinced he is struggling to breathe, that he has an underlying health condition that he doesn't know about and will die if he gets the virus.
I am trying to read positive stories but I'm hearing from friends who work in supermarkets and the uglyness of selfish people is more terrifying than the virus itself.

I'm scared. Not sure why really because I'm a pretty insular person, don't go far other than work and visiting my mum, brother and his family and my fella but if lockdown comes in I won't be able to see my brother or my fella - we live 17 miles apart - and I suffer with anxiety and chronic panic as well as fibromyalgia and I can feel things beginning to flare due to stress right now.

I'm scared for my parents, who are really not coping, and I can't go and see them or do anything other than sort online food orders etc because they are higher risk and can't have me potentially bringing the virus to them. My dad was quite ill with COPD in January and February, in hospital twice, seems to be getting ill again (coughing up dark secretions), has spent the past day and night crying with fear (and my dad I have seen cry a grand total of 4 times in my 38 years of life), my mum is climbing the walls and frantic.

Dad was called to the surgery for sputum samples and full blood yesterday at which point he was OK, but the coughing up etc has worsened a lot since them and I am trying to insist to them that they contact the surgery today and seek advice. So far they won't but at some point they must, even if just so a hcp with knowledge of his condition can tell him he's fine and to stay put, right?

I’m not scared and I fall into the at-risk group (serious heart condition ). I am keeping myself to myself and away from risk wherever possible and limiting interaction with the outside world. Having technically died three times last summer (cardiac arrest) I am not actually afraid of dying and am very much of the view that if we spend so much time worrying about dying we won’t be living.

Having said that, I think that the impact on people’s mental health is going to be far greater than the impact of the virus. Isolation is used as a form of torture in some places, now the government and individuals and circumstances expect us to put ourselves through it willingly.

The reasoning for that is sound, but the impact is still a real one.

People being isolated from loved ones, from elderly family who could in fact die of natural causes in that time, even younger people with underlying conditions having to cut themselves off from the outside world. While we obviously need to do it, I don’t think that the impact on MH should be downplayed.

You could also try thinking about and making a list of 5 ways you will positively alter your life once this is all over. Will you appreciate the simple things like nature more? Will you make your life less frantic? Will you try and meditate more? Will you pick up a new hobby? Will you have better appreciation of what are your needs rather than wants and appreciate those fulfilled wants more?

Focusing, even for a few minutes a day on the positive possibilities in the future will give your mind respite from the negativity of today.