How long did it take you to conceive aged 34+?

[terrier141]

Ok Im 34 - I have 2 dc's aged 10 and 8 but would desparately love to have another within a loving relationship. I am not ttc at the mo because circumstances are not right, am just starting to panic that I might be running out of time? What do you think? If I do find the right circumstances how likely is it to happen and how long is it likely to take? Any advice appreciated, thanks xx

Am 35 - been ttc for a year with no success to date. Took about 10 months of being off pill before cycles normalised (was on pill for 8 years).

Aged 35 - 18mths with DD
Aged 38 - 1 night with DS (wasn't trying, thought we'd be safe as it took so long to get pregnant with DD)

Got pg with ds at 32,after 6-7 months of trying. Started ttc again when he was 1. Am now 35 and have been ttc for over a year. Got pg quickly,had mmc diagnosed at 12 weeks. 7 months (ish) later got pg again (this nov). Had ectopic mc on Xmas day.

ski is right,it's good to hear encouraging stories but the reality is that it's not like that for all of us...

Wishing you luck though.

yes lets be realistic, if 7-8 months is average for a 34 year old, then a lot of people are going to take longer than that, as some will take less.
also i would add that most people i know trying to conceive in their thirties have had at least one miscarriage at some point p

started ttc #1 at 34, got bfp at 2 weeks under 1 year of ttc, at 35.

Just wanted to add... I started ttc my first aged 32 - I got PG 5 months later (I was 33 by this point) but sadly I miscarried and after that it then took a further 7 months (of going nuts) before getting pg again - so it actually took me 14 months from starting ttc to concieving one that has managed to so far make it to 13 weeks..

I found this ages ago on the babyworld website:

The chances of getting pregnant in each cycle vary according to a wide range of factors, but perhaps the most important one is the woman?s age.

For a woman aged 20-25, the chances of conceiving are around 25 per cent for each cycle (that is a one in four chance)
For a woman aged 30-35, the chances are 15 per cent, and thereafter the likelihood of becoming pregnant continues to decline with increasing age
It will take a couple in their early twenties an average of five cycles to conceive
Women in their early thirties will get pregnant, on average, after nine cycles
One in ten couples will take more than a year to succeed in conceiving

so average sound be 9 months of trying...

It took me 9 months of 'targeted' trying (OPK sticks, monitoring cycles) to get pregnant. Started TTC when I was 36, will be 38 when this baby is born, all being well.

I wasn't prepared for how long it took - even though statistically, I know now I'm pretty average for my age. Because I'd fallen pregnant unintentionally while on the pill aged 21 (terminated), and had very regular cycles with no obvious problems, unlike some unlucky women, then I think I had delusions of super-fertility. Ha ha.

I do think with threads like these (and my god, I went looking for them over those 9 months), there is a tendency for those who fell pregnant v quickly to come forward more readily than those who had problems, or who took a long time (or who are still trying). I'm glad some of the latter have commented here. There are many different stories/time scales of getting pregnant in mid/late 30s, and I wish I had been more realistic when I started TTC.

Age 34 - 2 months
Age 37 - 12 months of proper trying with lots of sex at fertile times of the month, at least one 'chemical' pregnancy (damn those early pg tests) and was just beginning fertility investigations when got the BFP.

Having had a MMC last summer it made me realise how none of us has a divine right to have children, and as we all know, particularly those like me who avidly follow TTC threads, there can be many complications in conceiving. BUT it can also be the simplest thing in the world - that's what's so frustrating. There are no guarantees.

FWIW I got pg at 39 without trying - literally one drunken night with DP (had been very wrapped up in my career and terrified of change) and DS was born when I was 40. Started trying again when he was one, and fell first month again; sadly had a MMC at 13 weeks. Started TTC again and have just got a BFP on cycle 4. I will be 42 next month.

I do think a belief in what'll be will be helps. Everyone parrots that stress is a factor in infertility, I think that must be true. Worrying about it won't make it happen, and might just prevent it.

Good luck to all TTC.

15 per cent per cycle? 15?? There is something about seeing it in black and white again that brings on my stress headache and acid indigestion.

at 36 it took me 4 months to conceive..at 39 less than two months after having miscarried 3 motnsh earlier and now at 41 been trying for 4 months still nothing..we never do try too hard and never do anything special btw..if it happens this time ok if not we are content with just our 2 DSs!

We had a one hit wonder for DS1 (aged 33)
and then it took us three months for DS2 (aged 35)

but then we are both fit (ish) I am not too overweight (he is like a stick) don't smoke, don't drink too much, eat lots of fruit and veg etc etc
and I do believe that these things matter more than age in your thirties

1 month (possibly less- didn't have period again after coming off pill) was 37.

Conceived ds1 at 33 after many years of trying
Conceived ds2 at 35 first month of trying

Ummm...I would also like to say that some of us who are not finding ourselves easily pg are also fit,not overweight,eat healthily,don't smoke,and try not to stress about the whole thing...

I'm sure it's not intentional but some of you who have found this 'easy' list these things in such a way that it makes me feel like you think that those who don't fall pg (or in my case stay pg) easily have somehow brought it on themselves. We are not all obese,chainsmoking alcoholic couch potatoes y'know.

What ginhag said. I'm also not overweight unfit or have a poor diet, smoke or drink too much, and neither is my OH, so I can't really buy into that being a factor.

Hello,

I just turned 37 in December. My friend recommended this site: www.fertilityfriend.com/courses/lesson.php?p=1;0;751689;6c26

It's free and helps you learn when you are most fertile during your cycle. I came off the pill in December 2008 and had a few months of strange periods while my body adjusted. I was pregnant by mid April. So I think if you have pretty good fertility in your family, and you learn when you are most likely to conceive in your cycle, it could happen relatively quickly.

I always assumed I'd conceive within a couple of months cos my mum and sister did - though they both did when 27, not 34. I think I'd just say beware assumptions!

concieved ds2 after 1 month aged 35

Yes, it could happen relatively quickly, but I think the take home message from the experienced posters on this thread is that it might not, despite doing everything right and following your cycle and all the rest of the TTC wisdom. And if it doesn't happen straight away it's normal and no-ones fault.

What I'm taking from this discussion is by all means, be positive, but also be realistic, the evidence is out there to show that age is a strong factor. And that you don't know what your outcome will be until you try.

(Gin - after I posted on Xmas day, I saw the BESHies were arriving so left you to it. I wish you all the best and really hope the new year brings what you want.)

I conceived DD (10) when I was 34 in the first month of trying, and conceived DS (8) when I was 35 1/2 in the first month of trying.

I have lots and lots of friends of a similar age (some even older, gasp!) who also conceived their DC - similar ages - very quickly.

So it can be done!

Just read some more posts. I eat healthily, don't smoke and only had one or two glasses of wine at the time, but my BMI was quite high. I do have a friend who has tried for years to conceive and has not had any success, though she has done everything "by the book". I think luck or family heredity comes into it at some point....

ginhag and vag I know what you are saying... I think there can be a smug undertone (intended or absolutely unintentional) in the fall (and stay) quickly pregnant gang. "Aren't I clever..."

I believe moderation in everything is the best path - FWIW I'm overweight (not massively) and always enjoyed a glass or 2 during TTC (bottle or 2 pre DS)... as did DP.

I think getting too obsessive about any aspect of life will prove counterproductive; diet, temps, essential days to SWI whatever.

Of course TTC requires some attention; knowing about your cycle will mean you are more likely to be having sex in the fertile period, but obsessing about what every fall/rise in temperature/change in CM composition might mean is probably not helpful.

So moderation is the key....

Luck and other factors beyond our control play a huge factor. Women don't get pregnant because they are morally deserving - they get pregnant if their individual biological circumstances allow them to.

Of course being generally healthy is sensible advice at all times. We know smoking and heavy drinking can affect fertility. But there are still plenty of things we cannot control - one can live a textbook lifestyle and still not be ovulating/have blocked tubes etc.

I don't really agree with someone who posted on this thread earlier - who said they thought diet/healthy lifestyle were more important than age during their 30s. (to be fair, I mean more late 30s, that being the age bracket me and most of my mates fall into). Your eggs don't get any younger no matter what you eat or how you exercise etc. Nor will your ovarian reserve increase. I really don't want to be a doom-monger or a wet blanket here - but age is a factor.

After spending my twenties actively preventing pg I found myself ttc in my early 30's to no real avail. A couple of m/c's later and I was about to be referred to my local fertility clinic when I fell pg again, retained it and now have a lovely DS-2.7yrs old.
However we have used no contraception since he was born and have not yet conceived albeit only really trying for last 12 months 'properly'. DP having sperm analysis this month and I'm going for scans in the morning- wish me luck- to check my bits. I will probabl go on clomid and hope for the best as i am 38 this year.
I am healthy and so have to agree whole- heartedly with posters in the vein of Barkfox- age IS CRUCIAL and 'individual biological circumstances' pre-determine our fertility success ie/ if you have PCOS, irregular cycles, low ovulation rates etc etc