Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Trying for a Spring baby

342 replies

MandM · 29/06/2005 09:51

Here it is girls - the all new, trying for a spring baby thread. Hope everyone from the Febraury thread can come on over and join us - plus any newcomers too of course!

And to those that don't make it over - CONGRATULATIONS

OP posts:
homemama · 09/08/2005 09:17

Morning everyone.
Welcome Loveverona and good luck.

After much debate, we decided last night not to try this month as I just couldn't face being sick whilst trying to move to the other end of the country! (I had hyperemesis last time)

This is all assuming we caught this month but as we've only been trying 1 mth and we caught first time last time then it could well happen.

I'll still bob on and off the thread to see how you are all doing but here's hoping most of you will be lucky this month and I'll be left on my own!

LilacLotus · 09/08/2005 09:52

i had a panic attack last night
i just started thinking about all the things that could go wrong in pregnancy, about something being wrong with the baby (downs, heart defects, disabilities). anyway, DP was very good at calming me down. he said that if i wanted to put TTC on hold or stop all together he would understand. he made a very good point though. if i had found out i was pregnant by now i would still have these worries and we would have had the attitude to wait and see rather than me chickening out.
i think i need some positive vibes about this. someone to tell me this is all still a good idea. also, i don't want to be this negative on this thread but i don't know where else to post this.

Dana · 09/08/2005 10:17

LL, I totally understand your thoughts and concerns. Once in a while these fears hit me as well. When trying for DS I didn't really have any concerns, probably cause I fell pg straight away and didn't get time to think about. But also because I didn't know anybody who had had problems and didn't know much about the risks of different illnesses, disabilities etc. Hadn't even considered the possibility of miscarriage (So naive ). Now through friends, colleagues at work and especially through MN and other parent-sites I hear so many stories and think about it a lot more than I used to.

But for me the urge to have another child is far far greater than the risk of something going wrong.

You're young, healthy (I assume ) and already have a healthy DD. Try not to worry. So many babies are born healthy everyday, and so will yours be

Just put down your concerns here as much as you want. That's what we are all here for!!

bubble99 · 09/08/2005 10:24

Hi all. Can I join you here? I'm TTC number 4. I have 3 DS' 7,5 and nearly 6 months. DS3 should have had a twin brother but his twin died and we'd love to provide a little brother or sister, close in age, for him to grow up with.

LilacLotus · 09/08/2005 10:25

thank you dana. that really helped.
as DD wasn't exactly planned i didn't think about it as much and i fear that if TTC will take a long time these thoughts will get worse.
and yes, i am pretty healthy at 27.
DP and i are firm believers in that everything happens for a reason. like DD, she brought so much love. if she wasn't born than neither would her cousin as DD set off my SIL to want a baby etc. i see it like that with TTC too. we didn't get pregnant last month so that potential baby obviously wasn't meant to be the next one IYSWIM.

Dana · 09/08/2005 10:26

Welcome loveverona, hope there will be good news for you this week!! Don't know about symptoms 2nd time around, as only have one DS (same age as your DD). Hopefully I will know soon, though

Homemama, make your mind up girl!!
No, totally understand. Plenty of time as well, DS only 8-9 months isn't he? When are you moving?

LilacLotus · 09/08/2005 10:27

hi bubble99!
i think i've seen you around on the may/june baby thread
good luck!

Dana · 09/08/2005 10:32

I believe that too, LL. So many things have happened in my life, where I have thought "that just isn't fair" and then something good comes out of it, and I think "Ahhh, so that's why that happened". So know what you mean. I too think that the longer it take to conceive, the more I will worry about these things. But I think you can go a long way with the "everything happens for a reason" approach!!

homemama · 09/08/2005 13:41

Yea Dana, DS is 8 1/2mths old!
We move next mth so if I got pg this mth, I'd be in the thick of it at move time. Don't really want to wait but I don't think it's fair to leave the move to DH. We also have two cars so we both need to drive down.
Still keep thinking about it though. I'm on CD10 today

MandM · 09/08/2005 15:15

Hello!

Dana/Sarjon - I didn't go away unfortunately just spent the week at home with dd because the childminder was away. Can't complain I suppose, I went to the Maldives in May and we're planning a trip to Canada in November, so I haven't done too badly this year!

Welcome Loveverona! Good Luck to you!

Homemama - that seems a sensible decision, but hope you'll still be around to catch up on all the news and rejoin those of us that are left when the time is right for you.

Lilaclotus - I more than most can completely understand your fears and they are very normal. I fell pregnant with dd straight after getting married and coming off the pill. I never really considered the possibility of miscarriage, or disability, or problems of any kind. Anyway, the farce of a birth that I had with dd resulted in her having Cerebral Palsy and when she was 2 she was also diagnosed with Williams Syndrome (a rare genetic disorder). I, like most, thought that these were the kinds of things that happen to "other people"...until I discovered that in actual fact there is no such thing and they can happen to anyone.

All that said, having a disabled child does make life more challenging, for them and for you, it's a different experience than the one you planned when you set out on the conception journey and at times it is overwhelming and devastating BUT it is not the end of the world - you cope, no matter how much you think you won't and no matter who you are, you cope. Better than that, as with raising any child, for the most part it is a fun-packed, laughter-filled, wonderful experience. Of course, I would give anything for my daughter to have been NT, but at the same time, knowing her and loving her as I do now, I wouldn't want to risk changing a thing about her, because what if taking away her disabilities took away the essence of the happy little madam that she is?!

Of course, of course, of course, I am hoping and praying that this time around we have a straight forward NT experience. I will be considering ante-natal testing because the thought of coping with 2 disabled children is overwhelming, even though I know deep down that somehow we would manage and enjoy it!

What I am trying to say, amongst all this waffle, and hopefully help you rationalise your worries, is that sometimes things do happen that you haven't planned, sometimes your life does take a different path than the one you set out on, but "different" does not have to mean "better" or "worse", just simply "different".

And it doesn't stop you wanting to set out on that journey all over again - look at me!

OP posts:
homemama · 09/08/2005 16:40

Oh MandM, we went to the Maldives on honeymoon. Blissfully beautiful but perhaps a little boring if not on honeymoon
Unless you go there to dive.

homemama · 09/08/2005 16:43

BTW, this thread is getting a little long. Shall I start a new one? Any title ideas?

lovecloud · 09/08/2005 19:07

little lambs?

sarjon · 09/08/2005 19:42

Hi, LL i was going to write something similar to MandM in response to your question but she's said it all so succinctly and she also speaks with the benefit of experience. At the end of the day, anything you do in life could be considered a risk, but you can't spend your life worrying about everything and, as MandM says, not everything that happens is necessarily better or worse, just different.

See?? MandM definitely said it better than I can!!!

Bubble99, hello and good luck!!!

Homemama, sounds like you're probably making the right decision, moving home is such a stressful time anyway, even more so with a baby in tow and feeling icky whilst trying to move would be awful. Keep checking back, let us know how the move goes!

Anyone know how pigleychez is??

Dana and Loveverona, how are you both doing??

Oooh, by the way, finally finished my dissertation last night (yay!!! ) so will hopefully start to chill out a bit! No sign of af but still not optomistic bout being pg, just need af to arrive to convince me and then we can start trying again!!!

LilacLotus · 09/08/2005 21:39

thank you all so much. i feel much better about it all now. i think what i'm scared of is that i had such a textbook pregnancy with DD (doctors at the hospital described it that way and were very eager to chat with me) that i just expect lots to go wrong the second time around.
last night at 2am i woke up when DD needed the loo and my mind started wandering. i rang DP at work and he was ever so supportive. we have decided we will keep trying and whatever happens happens.
and mandm, you sound like an amazingly strong woman

homemama · 09/08/2005 21:40

as mentioned, the thread is getting rather long and many of us are drifting between this one and the May/June one so I've just started a new one,
'lets get fat for summer'
Hope to see you all there!

homemama · 09/08/2005 21:41

p.s Lilac, glad you're feeling better

New posts on this thread. Refresh page