Nervous about starting IVF via NHS. Positive stories please.

[RoseWinter]

Hello all,

I've been referred for a cycle of IVF on the NHS and the time to start is almost here. I was referred as I was diagnosed with stage 4 endometriosis but about 18 months ago I had surgery to remove this. We've tried naturally and it's not worked yet hence having an NHS funded cycle.

I've just had the call that my medication has been ordered and will be arriving this week but I won't be starting until my next cycle. I'm doing the long protocol so I'm super nervous about it all.

I guess I'm reaching out for support and positivity. I know it's not going to be a doddle and it's going to be quite a process, but is anyone able to share how they kept focused and positive through it all. Any positive stories of your IVF journeys? Was anyone actually not really affected by going through IVF? I keep hearing to prepare for how long and draining emotionally, mentally and physically it's set to be. Has anyone felt differently going through the process?

Somehow praying that we concieve naturally before it starts so we don't have to go through it but I suppose most of us on this journey have the same thought right?

I did a short protocol so it's maybe not the same, but I actually didn't find it too bad physically, except on the last day before the egg retrieval, when I was quite bloated. I didn't mind injecting myself with the drugs, and I didn't get any particular side effects (except on the progesterone beforehand, where I felt sluggish and grumpy). The bit we hadn't been expecting was the emotional side (somehow the language people use, e.g. 'invasive' etc. seems to emphasise the physical so we started out quite blase about the mental side) - mainly because when you are trying to conceive naturally you don't know when/whether you've conceived, whether it's implanted, whether you've had a very very early miscarriage etc., but when you are having IVF you have too much information and you start to realise what the odds are of something not working at every tiny stage. However, they should also offer you fertility counselling to help you process this as a couple.

In terms of positive stories - my first frozen embryo transfer just woke up from his nap and has done a big poo, and I can feel my second frozen embryo transfer kicking - from the same round.

I remember feeling so overwhelmed with IVF when it felt like it suddenly approached (after a long journey to get there). I won't sugar coat and say it wasn't tough, but two things helped me get through (other than my very supportive husband)

1. speaking to others who have been through it/ understand it - so what you are doing here! But also if you know anyone in real life, and if not get on instagram. Loads of people out there sharing their journeys, and I found that really helpful because people who haven't gone through it just don't get it, lucky them!

2. really treating myself/ looking after myself during the cycle. So planning favourite foods/ baths etc and if you can spoil yourself. Book a (ivf friendly!) massage or acupuncture. Anything, just spoil yourself.

I hope this helps, and good luck!

Hey
We are also doing nhs ivf soon

My pm-s are open

Thank you so much for your response. It's really very helpful x

Thank you for sharing your story with me. It gives me hope and is really helpful ❤️ also congratulations on your little one and your 2nd pregnancy too. How wonderful! All the advice and tips for pampering myself sound right up my street x

Sending you all the luck and baby dust. Have you been told whether you'll be doing the short or long protocol yet?

Thank you
You too

No not yet - expect to hear more this month

25 years ago - my aunt did ivf
She had triplets

I had one round on the nhs, following endo surgery. Ended up having to be ICSI as the swimmers weren’t great either.

Physically found it fine - had a couple of hot flushes at one point which was the weirdest bit. Did all the injections myself and they were easier than expected. (I’d seen people letting the husband do them to be part of the process and then saying it hurt less when they did it themselves!)

Followed all the instructions to the letter so that I knew if it didn’t work it didn’t feel like ‘my fault’ but rather the drugs for that cycle being ineffective or whatever.

Anyway, turned out fine and he’s now a stinky, hilarious and very affectionate only child with an inconvenient August birthday because the nhs chose the timing! Cannot be more grateful that IVF was a thing. Best of luck to you for it.

Fellow endo warrior here! We had ivf long protocol which worked first time for us and we have a beautiful little boy.
We also somehow got pregnant naturally so I'm currently in my third trimester with baby number 2, complete surprise/miricle pregnancy as we were told my tubes were blocked due to the endo so would always need ivf.
I didn't find the process of ivf too bad, no real side effects or anything. The injections weren't fun but you get used to them. The two week wait was the hardest part waiting to find out if it had worked but I just tried to stay as busy as possible! Sending you lots of luck!

I hear you. I think its the fear of the unknown that's making me a little anxious and how badly we just want even just the one baby. I'm 39 soon too so its all feeling a little daunting and like I have little time left. I have to admit, though my diet isn't really that bad, I haven't been the best with meal planning recently so I need to get back on top of that. I've also read 'It Starts with the Egg' and removing plastics, caffeine, sugars, exercising, diet, is something that I'm focusing more on now. Thank you so much for sharing your experience with me. Every response is helpful and is making me feel I'm not alone in my thoughts.

Your experience brings me so much hope, thank you for sharing it. Congratulations on achieving your beautiful family and on your soon to be little one's arrival. Hoping it all goes well x

My long protocol, first try, ivf bundle is about to turn 12!!

He's sat on his bed playing Xbox with his mates in a motorbike helmet he's just saved up for himself for karting.

We've had the most incredible 12 years that I never ever dared to dream would happen.

Go for it!!

(His 3 yo, natural miracle, little bro has just rocked up from his childminders too).

We have two little miracles from our one round of NHS IVF. It's honestly the best thing I've ever done. Fingers crossed for you.

My positive story is 9 months old, has the chubbiest of cheeks and has recently learned to clap.

We did two rounds of IVF on the NHS due to unexplained infertility. Physically, it was OK. Injecting myself wasn't fun but you get used to it and I'd just have a bit of chocolate afterwards ... never too old to be bribed with chocolate 😂 Emotionally, I felt a bit of a train wreck. It takes over your life. The two week wait (after embryo transfer) is the longest two weeks ever and you analyse everything. Everything.

I don't remember much of the details of my IVF treatment now really. I barely think about it anymore. It does amaze me that my perfect little girl started her existence in a lab, when in every other way she is just like any other baby.

A colleague of mine has endometriosis and got pregnant with her first embryo transfer. They've since had another baby through natural conception.

We did one private cycle of IVF (short protocol). I found it a doddle to be honest in terms of the injections. I had no side effects from the meds despite over responding and the egg collection and transfer went smoothly.

Ultimately it didn't work for us and I had a chemical pregnancy with my first transfer but...

...by some miracle I had a natural conception the month afterwards and she's now sleeping in her cot 🥰

I kinda credit the IVF with readying my body for her if that makes sense at all? 🤷🏻‍♀️😅

Woah, what a blessing. Family complete in one go x

How wonderful. Thank you for sharing your experience with me. It's so lovely to hear you were able to concieve both naturally after IVF success.

My meds just got delivered today. Not sure how I feel about it all. It's all becoming a bit too real.

Twins? Oh wow, so lovely to hear. I'd absolutely love two in one go but even just the one we'd be grateful for.

My meds have arrived today. I'm feeling all sorts. I want to be excited, I really do but the fear of the unknown is creeping in.

Good luck @RoseWinter ! I just wanted to say I found this website really helpful for making sense of the IVF process and how it all works.

I'm so pleased to hear that you were able to conceive naturally though the IVF didn't work. I have heard about something called subfertility, where there is no reason for infertility but it just hasn't happened naturally for people until hormones are heightened by IVF, so though IVF may not work, it may aid natural fertility. I'm not a medical professional so I'm not sure how true that actually is and even if I got the sub fertility thing right but it is just something that I've heard. Chrissy Teigan, Kourtney Kardashian, and a few people I know of or work with have been through failed IVF but some how concieved naturally.

Oh thank you so much. I really appreciate the support. The clinic that I've been referred to is a private one and they made my other half and I go through lots of video modules of the process, the meds, the risks etc with little quizzes after each module too. Think he was more anxious than me and he gets to do the nice easy part 😂

@RoseWinter we did those videos and quizzes too, I think - was it all part of the consents process? My DP and I actually did IVF twice (once each) and the first time they did all that stuff in person at special consent meetings. I think post-Covid they've moved to the online modules as they all got developed then. But definitely would still recommend the Duff website as it's more a mixture of personal experience, and more in-depth looking at the science behind the process, but explained really clearly.

Oh right, that would make sense why it's all online now then. We've been in to the clinic a few times but it's about an hours drive for us. There are other branches but its the same distance and time so makes no real difference which one we got referred to but definitely so much easier having video calls and the online videos and learning platform.

I feel cramping the little today very mildly and was holding on to hope that it's early signs of a potential pregnancy as there was no bleed... Until now 😕 so yeah, feeling a bit eeew about everything.

Though I have received my meds today, it's unlikely I'm going to start the process until January because I have to go into a temp menopause before the stimulation phase and it may be that the Christmas break gets in the way. So, we find out next week during our treatment plan appointment, what the timescale and dates will be for us to actually start.

My positive stories are now 23 and 19. Beautiful young women whom I'm really proud of.

Dd1 conceived on 3rd round of IVF. Had another round 2 years later which didn't work. Was told that I just wasn't producing enough eggs due to age (40).

Went to Australia for dh's work a year later and decided to try again. Different country, different hospital, different protocol... I had 6 grade A embryos, 2 inserted, 4 frozen and one took, producing dd2.

I remember being so much more chilled doing ivf again after having successfully had dd1. We too had icsi for dd2 as I just don't think dh's sperm could penetrate the wall of my eggs.

I do remember how much of an emotional rollercoaster it was first time around and how I desperately wanted it to work. How painful it was hearing of friends' and sisters' pregnancies and births. How empty I felt. I spoke with a woman in her 30s from a support group who had just had her second through ivf and I remember thinking I could never be that lucky. But I was. And I'm sure technology and clinical knowledge had progressed in the past 23 years. I guess I'm trying to say, don't lose hope. It was a journey I had to try but everyone draws their own line in the sand as to when to step off. Good luck, OP.