Nervous about starting IVF via NHS. Positive stories please.

[RoseWinter]

Hello all,

I've been referred for a cycle of IVF on the NHS and the time to start is almost here. I was referred as I was diagnosed with stage 4 endometriosis but about 18 months ago I had surgery to remove this. We've tried naturally and it's not worked yet hence having an NHS funded cycle.

I've just had the call that my medication has been ordered and will be arriving this week but I won't be starting until my next cycle. I'm doing the long protocol so I'm super nervous about it all.

I guess I'm reaching out for support and positivity. I know it's not going to be a doddle and it's going to be quite a process, but is anyone able to share how they kept focused and positive through it all. Any positive stories of your IVF journeys? Was anyone actually not really affected by going through IVF? I keep hearing to prepare for how long and draining emotionally, mentally and physically it's set to be. Has anyone felt differently going through the process?

Somehow praying that we concieve naturally before it starts so we don't have to go through it but I suppose most of us on this journey have the same thought right?

Positive experience here from start to finish. Our nhs clinic were professional and supportive. Couldn't fault them.
I honestly didn't experience any side effects of medication which was great.

My whole experience went so smoothly and I now have my beautiful 4 month old which I'm so grateful for.

Our NHS IVF DS just turned 20, it was our second attempt, 1st attempt was private but was same clinic / consultant. I would try not to tell too many people, obviously those close to you, just in case it doesn’t work, people will be waiting on your news, and if it doesn’t remember the IVF cycle may answer more questions about why you are not conceiving. Good luck and I really hope you get your wish to get preggars before it starts, I always remember being in hospital waiting to have a Laparoscopy, and we had to do a pregnancy test before the op, the girl in the bed next to me came back positive so that was the end of her infertility journey!

Our bodies sometimes have our own manual
And sometimes no rhyme or reason
Or sometimes that changes

We concieved naturally last yr
But then had early miscarriage .

We are about to start ivf ..

Weather our nhs IVF works or not - i still feel.we may.concieve naturally in the future as we did last yr

I guess im.guna try and get my head into the head space of - it will either work or not
And if it doesnt - we will be trying again

Ive had 3 colonoscopies
And i found drinking the prep mix horrendous so i keep telling myself that the meds/ needles etc cant be worse than that

Sending u all.the luck

I had a long old journey with IVF - two full rounds and seven transfers, 3 losses and one beautiful 2yr old boy running around with a dinosaur right now ❤️ it was hard work, physically and mentally - at the time I very much cracked on with it, but came out of it a different person. I lost a lot of friends because I couldn’t deal with the ease at which they had babies and soon we had nothing in common anymore. It made me bitter and lonely and not a pleasant person to be around for a long time, and I wish I’d sought professional help sooner.

In terms of the medical side, I could not have asked for more; my second cycle was funded by me but carried out in the same clinic as my NHS one. Doctors were genuinely sympathetic and tried everything to help me. Often failed transfers just raised more questions and were almost like a step to finding out what was wrong (mine was unexplained), or to try a different protocol next time. There was NHS counselling available after losses but it was brief.

After the birth, I developed autoimmune diseases after birth including alopecia universalis - no idea if this is all directly linked but the stress on your body can’t be underestimated. I desperately want to try again but it’s not sensible.

Go into it hopeful but open eyed. Make time for yourself and your relationship throughout. Have a plan for if it doesn’t happen. Best of luck to you ❤️

My one NHS cycle day 3 transfer 8 cell is currently watching trash on TV having constructed something out of loo rolls. I tolerated the drugs fine (once I got the hang of injections - my partner did them initially but I actually found them much less painful when I did them myself as I was more in control), and the egg collection was a weird experience but not bad. The first time is also weird because they're kind of guessing the quantity of drugs to give you, so everything was a bit uncertain. The hardest thing but for me was the mental part - trying not to stress too much about it and letting the process happen. Wishing all the best and I really hope it works for you!

I always recommend the Big Fat Negative podcast, that helped me through my IVF “journey”.

The main positive story is my 3 year old who wakes me up with cuddles, tells me she loves me and is just so funny and fun to be around.

My fresh embryo transfer ended in a chemical pregnancy and that was by far the hardest part. After nearly 4 years TTC, IVF delayed by Covid, and I also have endometriosis that was diagnosed but untreated, I just felt so broken. I got fertility counselling free through the clinic. And the frozen embryo transfer worked.

The IVF itself was draining but I don’t look back on it as a terrible experience. I used to watch comedy videos around any of the physically hard bits because I’d read a study that people who laughed at the time of their transfers were more likely to get pregnant- I think medically that study is a bit dubious but laughing did help my mood.

Best of luck, one of the best things for me about starting was we were finally taking active steps that might result in a baby.

My IVF babies are now 27 and 28 so my experience is dated.
I only did one cycle, my second is a frozen embryo.
The thing that really helped me was to take each day on its own. I didn't think, or ask, about what was going to happen next. I focus on today.
I was somewhat downbeat about it which is very unlike me.
At the end of the cycle my friend got married and I started the day at the hospital have my usual shot, I would let my DH do them, and ended the wedding in the delivery suite having the shot that triggered egg collection.
The wedding was in Dewsbury Registery Office and we went into the park to take pictures. There was an older couple with two golden retrievers and a huge pushchair with triplets in. I love dogs and people and headed over to say hello. The babies belonged to their daughter and I cheekily asked if they were IVF and they were.
That evening after my jab I told the nurse in the delivery suite that I would see them in 9 months, and I did.
My DH was shocked because up until then I'd been so downbeat.
When DS was six months old my frozen embryos were given to me and I had my DD. I was 39 and nearly 41 when they were born. It was magical, like every baby.
Hope that counts as an upbeat story.

I had 2 cycles of NHS IVF as a 39 year old after multiple miscarriages and a ruptured ectopic. I booked some leave coinciding with the second embryo transfer. He’s now almost 14. Just try to keep as relaxed as possible and don’t stress yourself out doing earlier than recommended pregnancy tests. Good luck. 💐

@worldwidetravel2017 when you starting ivf? I hope it all goes well for you. I've seen you about the forums for a long time now and I think we used to be in the same thread a while back so I've got my fingers crossed for you

Wishing you all the luck. It's a journey. I had 4 rounds. Physically I coped well - worked throughout, no time off, looking after a toddler at home, husband having chemotherapy after bowel cancer at the same time 🙈, you just plough on. It's hard mentally because infertility is such a burden and to be on the cusp of putting it behind you for so long but with no certainty is draining. BUT I'm just about to pick up my IVF miracle from drama - she's 9. It was all worth it.

And I never really think about it now. Amazing how something so all consuming can become a distant memory.

Thanks so much

Will be jan or feb

Should know more this month

( had private hyfosy oct 1st that showed blocked tubes but they werent blocked last year and it may not be a perm block.
2 consultants have mentioned possibly tubal spasm etc but i think i have undiagbosed endo too )

Hope your well

Lovely post

My counsellor at the clinic told me to soothe myself (/ relax)
Ive just ordered a bath pillow and bath tray

Congratulations on your little one. I'm so pleased to hear it all went so smoothly for you? My anxieties have been really getting me this weekend. Probably because I came on my period the same day the medication was delivered to me. I've felt really sad all weekend and had a little cry this evening at how hard this all is to have to go through. Trying to find out whether the positives but really just feeling so low about it all.

Two IVF littlies fast asleep in this house.

I agree with another poster that the emotional side was the hardest. The injections etc weren’t fab and I had mood swings etc due to all of the hormones, but it was all manageable for me. It was the wait and the “no it hasn’t worked yet” that were so painful.

That said looking back, having IVF was the best decision that we ever made.

Advice wise I would say plan your diary so that you have time and busyness in equal measure. Time to get to and from appointments without stressing about other things, busyness in whichever form you choose to help speed up the wait periods.

Also - too quick to press send - all the best of luck. Thinking of you.

@RoseWinter completely normal to feel anxious and down about it all.
We went through 18 years of infertility to have this little one, I've experienced all the highs and lows .
Just keep going and tell yourself not IF but WHEN I have my baby. Keep believing in that moment your going to hold your baby in your arms. Sending you lots of love ❤️

@RoseWinter how’s it going?

One cycle of IVF privately, as the NHS waiting list was 4 years then - twins!

Hello all,

Sorry I didn't update sooner than now.

My first round of IVF on the NHS was a rollercoaster. I had only 3 eggs collected and only one high grade embryo from them.

Somehow, against all odds my only embryo stuck for a short time. I fell pregnant, but it wasn't a viable pregnancy and I miscarried at 8 weeks 4 days back in late February.

We won't be doing IVF again, and I'm feeling pretty devastated about it all. With my endometriosis, now a potential fibroid and 1 fallopian tube, I think it's near impossible for us.

Forgive me for not sharing more happier news. 😔

So sorry for your update op, it can be a hard slog and so disappointing when things don't work out. You tried everything and hopefully that makes a difference long term to how you come to terms with things xx

I am sorry to hear that, but at least you know you tried everything and did your best.

A positive story

Nhs ivf round

currently 10 weeks pregnant

@RoseWinter Really sorry to hear this and pray you get the strength and support you need. You shouldn’t be sorry at all, be kind to yourself xx

I did IVF 30 years ago so not recent. I confess that my judgement is colour because it worked for me, I hope it does for you too.
I found that taking it one day at a time really helped. Nothing was really difficult.
i was 38 and heavy with unexplained infertility so the odd were massively against me. Effectively, from my point of view, I had an unplanned pregnancy because I had no expectation that it would work.
My advice is to just take it one day at a time. Good luck.