Friend TTC at 45

[berrytree2024]

My friend is TTC at 45.
I was a bit taken a back when she said but kept positive.
I don't know anyone who has had a baby at this age. I think it might be a myth 🤷🏻‍♀️

It's her second . Her beautiful son is now 5.

Do you think I should say think again ?

It really is absolutely NONE of your business

It's possible but alot more difficult with a far higher risk of misscarriage having said that its up to them what they want to do. As a friend I would just be supportive and if it doesn't work out offer a shoulder to cry on.

I’m sure your friend knows that the odds are not in her favour of conceiving a healthy pregnancy naturally at 45. But it happens for some people and she may well be one of them. Why would it be your place to tell her to think again?

What other people choose to do with their bodies is completely their own business. You don’t sound like a particularly good friend.

What do you think you'll achieve by telling her to 'think again'?

Keep your opinion to yourself and be there for her as a friend.

I agree with this.

I had my second naturally at 45 (albeit conceived at 44). It's unusual but not a myth. That being said your friend has access to Google as much as the rest of us presumably so I would keep out of it/stay positive as you've been doing, she's likely aware of the odds!

My mother was born to my grandmother when she was 45. My cousin was born to my aunt in law at 44.

It likely won't happen but mind your own business.

In this generation it's statistically unlikely though I see no harm in letting her discover by herself.

The main reason many women don't have babies in their 40s these days is because they have access to contraception.

You only have to look at the size of families before contraception was easily available to see that family sizes were much bigger and women had children throughout their fertile years.

Having said all that, yes it is more difficult to get pregnant in your late 40s but no, it's not a myth that you can have a baby in your late 40s.

I'm sure your friend is more than aware of what the statistics say. Just be a friend! Support her decision and be there for whatever the outcome is.

Well, it's very unlikely to work but all you can do is be supportive.

It's none of your business. I'm sure she's aware of the statistics around likelihood to conceive and higher risk of baby having disability etc.

My MIL had my ex at 40 ... and his sister at 45 ... many years ago!

You wish her well and support her if it doesn't work out...the same as with a friend of any age!

The odds aren't brilliant at 40 year old either but she's had a baby then too so maybe she has great fertility and will catch very soon. Good luck to her!!

I got pregnant at 41 after one time (not planned) and gave birth to my daughter in January at 42, saying that, I guess there is perhaps a big gap fertility wise between 41/42 and 45. Good luck to her if that is what she wants. ❤️

I wouldn't say anything or comment. If it doesn't turn out as she hopes then she will know in time. I had a baby easily at 42 but that is quite a bit younger in fertility terms. I didn't tell anyone we were ttc though, I think I was quite embarrassed to be ttc at that age and didn't want anyone to know in case it didn't happen.

I've been extremely lucky fertility wise though and my daughter is my fourth, my others were born in my late 20s and early 30s. Your friend may have good fertility as she has already had a baby in her 40s.

It's unlikely to work out but it isn't impossible. I actually know someone who got pregnant naturally at 51! She wasn't trying. She'd never used contraception as she was told she was infertile. When her periods stopped at 51 and she put on weight she assumed it was the menopause. But no, it was a baby! Her little boy is now 5 and absolutely perfect.

I have a friend who had her 1st at 44 and 2nd at 48...

Some women do get lucky in their 40s and beyond. If she's otherwise healthy and has plenty of energy, she and her baby will be fine. I would leave her be.

No need for you to say anything unless you’re her GP or O&G.

Alot of mean comments on here...
Surely I can say - it's a real risk and isn't worth wasting your time. Enjoy your only!

How do you know it’s wasting her time? It’s her time to waste and she could be successful. You sound the mean one.

It doesn’t mean she won’t be enjoying her current child, lots of people ttc a second, doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy the one they have.

Why do you think she isn’t aware of the changes of a successful pregnancy at 45? I have two friends who had second pregnancies at 43 and 44, and there’s a woman locally who had an unplanned baby at 50.

Has she asked your opinion @berrytree2024 ?