Does anything actually work?!

[Fallulah]

Age is not on our side and we don’t qualify for IVF or fertility help due to age (we might have if GP had referred us properly on time but that’s a whole other story and subject to a complaint). All blood/hormone tests and scans have come back fine on multiple occasions. We’ve now been trying for 3 years so have decided to give it til my next birthday and then explore adoption/fostering. I want to throw everything at it!

In the early days I tested for ovulation and I use the Flo app but it’s pretty obvious when I’m ovulating without going in to detail! I take vitamin B, D, Zinc, folic acid and have taken pre conception gum**s but they messed with my cycle. My partner takes pre conception vitamins for men.

I’m being bombarded with adverts for Mira tracker, Gyna diet, Fertilily and all sorts of other drastic looking applicators.

Do any of these things actually work or are they just targeting desperate people? Is there anything else I should be taking supplement wise?

I'm convinced reflexology helped me fall pregnant

He would like it to just happen and doesn’t want to know about calendars, green days and schedules etc!
TBH- I never mentioned peak times after a while. I figured there was no point us both stressing about calendars, and it put more pressure on DH to have to perform at a certain time! He likely knew anyways, especially as I'd sometimes book a weekend away when ovulating, but don't think him knowing the ins and outs of my ovia app etc was helpful.

I’m an older person I used Proceive conception and the Proceive omega 3 and I drank myrtle and Maude fertility tea not sure it helped but I fell that month April having suffered a mc in Feb. I also only tracked and used clear blue digital test had sex every night or at least every other. I didn’t do temp and trying to use the other ovulation tests stressed me out. But most of all I relaxed.

We are positively old by parenting standards and have been pregnant several times.

OP, one thing that strikes me in what you say is that you've been using apps and symptoms to track ovulation.
To me it's not worth the gamble. This didn't work for us at all. Your ovulation symptoms, such as headaches, discharge etc might happen at totally different times to the actual ovulation. They certainly do for me.

There is only one thing that works to identify when you ovulate. Clearblue digital.
If you're "wasting" almost your dh's reserve too soon, it won't work.

What worked for us multiple times is only dtd once per cycle to build up reserves, and waiting until the clearblue test said positive for ovulation.

Good luck.

The evcm works. It's the last day that you make it.
Have sex then.

This is so insensitive. And don't promote adoption like it's some easy solution or quick fix.

After I fell pregnant right away with our first but MC it took us 2.5 years to succeed. Only after I started taking Proceive Max and Ubiquinol I finally got pregnant. I did do 16:8 fasting due to my BMI too so maybe all those together/one of those helped.

I actually am adopted so it’s something I’d be totally open to! It is quite galling when people tell you to just relax and go on holiday though.

I used Clearblue digital for the first year but it became so matched with the ewcm (absolutely buckets and clumps of the stuff on peak day) that I stopped because it was telling me what I could see for myself. Maybe I need to do it again for a while just to check.

I’m not very clued up on acupuncture and reflexology and how they may help - more research to do!

Reducing caffeine is what helped me. I was dubious but it worked after months of trying for dd2

Annoyingly the thing that will probably have the biggest impact is also the hardest, and that's your weight. So I'd spend the money on a personalised diet plan that takes into account your likes and habits to make it easier to stick to rather than more vitamins etc..

Same. Only did it once. Think that works

Having been through years of infertility myself EWCM and apps are not as reliable as people think....none can actually tell you if a follicle has been released etc - I paid privately for follicle tracking over several months - I'd give that a go and at least you are then timing things more accurately and know an egg is definitely being ovulated

I was told by the acupuncturist that it doesn’t work if age is a factor in your infertility. She said she’d feel uncomfortable in taking my money! Currently on a nutrition plan to improve egg quality.

I'm sorry to hear about your struggles, OP. I'm in a similar boat. I've had two natural losses and two IVF losses. The last loss was an IVF one and was diagnosed as an MMC at a 7 week scan. The sac measured about 5w3d. It was our 3rd and 4th embryo, respectively, as we had two put in. We have one left. Because we have a history of recurrent loss, we're seeking a referral to tommys.org.

We're both on Impryl. It's expensive, but it was suggested to us by an NHS midwife. My DH has low sperm, which explains why natural pregnancies are so rare for us. At this point, we're willing to try almost anything. I say 'almost' because there are a lot of scams out there exploiting desperate couples.

I saw a fertility nutritionist who helped me lose weight, but in a careful way which made sure my body had what it needed - previously I had been a yo-yo dieter with a terrible tendency to use very low calorie diets and she explained this wouldn't help fertility.

I also saw an acupuncturist and a reflexologist. Once I was doing this it took me about 3 or 4 cycles to conceive - compared with at least 3 years of trying before that. I obviously don't know what worked, but I do think something helped as we had done all the 'just relax'ing and holidays, having more sec, having fun etc. For whatever reason my body needed an extra bit of help - second time round it seemed to know what it was doing and only took 2 cycles...

That sounds so encouraging, congratulations! Can I ask how you found your fertility nutritionist?

EWCM is total rubbish for me. Discharge occurs a full week prior to ovulation and ends completely 2 or three days prior. Misleading...
Everyone is different.

After my miscarriage I:
gave up alcohol completely,
Started weekly acupuncture (it works)
Daily supplements
Daily walk or run/ relatively healthy diet

I honestly think the alcohol was the best thing as all the other factors I'd been trying for ages. I gave up alcohol for one month and one month late I was pregnant 🤷‍♀️

Not what you asked, and something that you may already know, but my friend went through the adoption process not so long ago and they found out fairly late in the process that their weight was an issue.

It is probably different depending on which agency you are dealing with, but the one she dealt with said that a BMI of 40 and above was a flat out no for now, while a BMI of 30 - 40 meant having to have more medical tests and having to show evidence of losing weight and eating healthily.

It all worked out in the end for her, but it did mean that the process took longer than she anticipated as she had to lose weight before things could progress further, which took some months. She was rightly annoyed that no one mentioned anything about her weight until they were months into the process already, and it added stress to an already really stressful process.

It was the opposite for me!! I had given up drinking for years. Went on holiday, got very drunk for two weeks, found out I was pregnant a few weeks later!!😂

It's just age, OP. None of the tests will tell you what your egg quality is like at 43. It's not unexplained infertility. It's just age.

Unexplained infertility is harsh! 10 years of our lives ttc, several ivfs, all other sorts of options explored. Am I ok to pm you? X

@Favofit I live in a city which has a small chain of alternative therapies clinics. They had been running a fertility clinic for a while and someone had recommended them to me, by the time I got in touch the nutritionist was working independently so I saw her separately and did the other things through the clinic.

Proceive max has arrived for me and him.

I also ordered some soft discs… after 15 minutes of trying one out to see if I can get it in the right place when needed I have given up. Just can’t get it to pop back to shape in the right place once it’s in! 😂