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Conception

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Original poster

TTC no1 after loss

43 replies

Plantpott · 14/03/2024 20:22

Is anyone ttc for their first after loss and wanting company? I'm currently on CD3 today so I'll be starting OPKs in a few days ready to try again.

OP posts:
Orlahoping · 14/03/2024 20:35

Me! On about day 10 after my first period. It's been a bit of a head fuck so far as I have been so anxious.

I had an MMC end of Jan. First pregnancy and nearly 38 so feeling like time is running out.

Original poster
Plantpott · 14/03/2024 21:27

@Orlahoping I'm sorry for your loss. I had a MMC early feb and that was my first pregnancy too. I'm only on CD3 today feeling very impatient as I just want it to be ovulation time already! I'm also feeling quite anxious about the potential of being pregnant again and how I'll cope with it but I'm not sure waiting would make it any easier.

OP posts:
Orlahoping · 14/03/2024 23:10

Tell me about it! I am both terrified of not conceiving and of being pregnant again.

I am trying my best to focus on exercise, a good diet and then just trying to enjoy myself as much as possible to keep me de-stressed (it's not working so far 😂).

So sorry for your loss. Hope you have good people around you as I know that is very helpful x

Ella31 · 14/03/2024 23:13

Plantpott · 14/03/2024 20:22

Is anyone ttc for their first after loss and wanting company? I'm currently on CD3 today so I'll be starting OPKs in a few days ready to try again.

So sorry for your loss.

Can I join? I'm technically trying for number 3 as I lost my twin sons at 29 weeks in November just gone. I had an emergency c section My second twin was stillborn, my other boy died 4 days later in the nicu. But I'm yet to bring home a living baby. I will say don't give up. I conceived my twins straight after a mc so it will happen for you.

I'm on cycle day 5 and this month 4 trying after losing my sons.

Ella31 · 14/03/2024 23:16

For those of you who this loss was your first. Don't give up hope. I had two before my twins and though I lost them too very late into 3rd trimester, it was for a random, freak reason. There is a rainbow after every loss.

Original poster
Plantpott · 15/03/2024 07:23

@Orlahoping I genuinely had no idea how difficult this whole thing could be prior to starting ttc the first time when it comes to the stress and anxiety! It's so tough isn't it! I'm trying to focus on exercise and being healthy too and keeping caffeine and alcohol low. I do have lots of support but I don't know anyone in my situation so it still feels a bit lonely, though I feel ungrateful saying that!

@Ella31 I'm so sorry for your losses and what you've been though. I really feel for you, I can't imagine how hard losing your twins must've been.

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Orlahoping · 15/03/2024 08:34

@Ella31 hello again :). How are you getting on?

@Plantpott the one thing I wasn't prepared for was things like feeling "ungrateful" when I didn't feel like enough people understood, or guilty for feeling bad because I have only had one loss, or angry when someone else gets pregnant etc etc. I have friends who have had losses but they all have their families now so they don't relate in the same way.

It's hard to be simultaneously still grieving the loss but absolutely obsessed with TTC and conceiving again. We are trying to not track ovulation or anything but to just DTD every other day once my period is over. Not sure how well that will play out but I wanted to avoid peeing on sticks and checking cervical mucus all the time...

I am finding The Worst Girl Gang Ever podcast and website really helpful; recommend that if you guys haven't come across it yet

HopefulTTC2024 · 15/03/2024 08:53

Me! Got pregnant in January but miscarried 😭 period has just came back today so hopefully we will be back trying over the next few weeks.
It's such a head melt 🫠

Ella31 · 15/03/2024 09:43

Orlahoping · 15/03/2024 08:34

@Ella31 hello again :). How are you getting on?

@Plantpott the one thing I wasn't prepared for was things like feeling "ungrateful" when I didn't feel like enough people understood, or guilty for feeling bad because I have only had one loss, or angry when someone else gets pregnant etc etc. I have friends who have had losses but they all have their families now so they don't relate in the same way.

It's hard to be simultaneously still grieving the loss but absolutely obsessed with TTC and conceiving again. We are trying to not track ovulation or anything but to just DTD every other day once my period is over. Not sure how well that will play out but I wanted to avoid peeing on sticks and checking cervical mucus all the time...

I am finding The Worst Girl Gang Ever podcast and website really helpful; recommend that if you guys haven't come across it yet

Hey @Orlahoping I'm good. Off on hols today so hoping this break will be relaxing and maybe lead to a bfp. How are you?

Orlahoping · 15/03/2024 10:04

@Ella31 not bad...on my way to a full day awards ceremony in London so I will be drinking the free alcohol and forgetting about everything else.

Hope you have a wonderful break...where are you going?

Orlahoping · 15/03/2024 10:05

HopefulTTC2024 · 15/03/2024 08:53

Me! Got pregnant in January but miscarried 😭 period has just came back today so hopefully we will be back trying over the next few weeks.
It's such a head melt 🫠

Welcome @HopefulTTC2024. So sorry for your loss. But at welcome back to your period - I felt a strange sort of relief when mine came back a couple of weeks ago

Ella31 · 15/03/2024 10:58

Orlahoping · 15/03/2024 10:04

@Ella31 not bad...on my way to a full day awards ceremony in London so I will be drinking the free alcohol and forgetting about everything else.

Hope you have a wonderful break...where are you going?

Oh amazing. Enjoy every bit of it. Heading to New York. Planning on a glass of wine in the airport

Ella31 · 15/03/2024 11:13

HopefulTTC2024 · 15/03/2024 08:53

Me! Got pregnant in January but miscarried 😭 period has just came back today so hopefully we will be back trying over the next few weeks.
It's such a head melt 🫠

So sorry for your loss. I wonder sugar coat, it's s###t but you will get through it. Talk and talk here if you feel like it. We',ve all been through loss unfortunately

gingerbiscuit24 · 15/03/2024 14:11

Can I join? I’m so sorry to read about everyone’s experiences, but holding out hope for us all!

I had a CP last summer and a MMC in Feb this year. Funny thing was that we weren’t actively trying to conceive (although not preventing either I suppose) on either occasion but now, particularly after the MMC last month, I feel slightly obsessed about TTC! Like PP, a very weird thing grieving a loss but being so focused on trying again.

Orlahoping · 15/03/2024 15:49

Welcome @gingerbiscuit24 to this shitty, but hopeful, club

Original poster
Plantpott · 17/03/2024 09:41

Welcome to the newcomers ☺️ I'm so sorry for your losses.

@Orlahoping There's an awful lot of emotions involved isn't there, i've been trying to remind myself that all feelings are valid and there's no right or wrong way to feel. Also that all feelings pass and get better in time. I've just been looking at the worst girl gang ever podcast - I'll definitely be giving it a listen on my commute next week!

I'm starting OPKs now AF is coming to an end. It does put a bit more pressure on but I think I need that reassurance that I'm ovulating. I've told myself I won't do any pregnancy tests unless I end up being a week late for next AF but that might all change when it comes to it!

How's everyone getting on?

OP posts:
Orlahoping · 17/03/2024 10:08

@Plantpott I am doing ok. This month I am not even tracking what cycle day I am on. Have outsourced it to my husband and we have just been having sex every other day from when my period ended. I don't think I can keep going with that approach but we decided to try and keep as much stress as possible out of this first cycle, even though I am desperate to conceive again

@Ella31 hope you had a great journey to NY. Enjoy!

Ella31 · 17/03/2024 11:43

Orlahoping · 17/03/2024 10:08

@Plantpott I am doing ok. This month I am not even tracking what cycle day I am on. Have outsourced it to my husband and we have just been having sex every other day from when my period ended. I don't think I can keep going with that approach but we decided to try and keep as much stress as possible out of this first cycle, even though I am desperate to conceive again

@Ella31 hope you had a great journey to NY. Enjoy!

Thanks @Orlahoping I'm doing the same. Still in New York , it's fabulous

Orlahoping · 18/03/2024 10:54

I think I am a day post ovulation today and already feel like AF is on its way. Feeling super hormonal and a bit hopeless. Usually I get a little bit of hope in the TWW.

gingerbiscuit24 · 26/03/2024 16:05

How is everyone doing?

AF arrived on Sunday, first time following my surgical management of MMC. As much as I tried not to get it in my head, I had been slightly optimistic for a BFP as I was experiencing similar symptoms to those prior to my BFP at the beginning of the year, and I never usually have any symptoms prior to AF arriving. Clearly just wishful thinking!

Orlahoping · 26/03/2024 16:15

Did a stupid early test at 9DPO this morning. BFN of course and I feel very PMT-y and grumpy. I just wanted to be one of those lucky people who are super fertile after and conceive really quickly...

Original poster
Plantpott · 27/03/2024 07:01

I think I'm 1dpo today, I'm not sure we managed to dtd at the right time this month as hubby was away a little while so I'm not feeling too hopeful. I also just didn't feel very fertile around ovulation. Hardly any EWCM, I felt exhausted and on the verge of coming down with something. Not sure if this makes any difference though!

OP posts:
Orlahoping · 29/03/2024 13:10

AF is arriving. Trying not to feel too disappointed!

gingerbiscuit24 · 29/03/2024 22:12

@Orlahoping hope you’re ok! Fingers crossed that our time is coming soon! 🤞🏻

Original poster
Plantpott · 31/03/2024 11:09

@Orlahoping that sucks, take care of yourself. Sending baby dust for next month x

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