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Original poster

The urge is so strong to TTC now, but should we wait?

31 replies

cheesetriangles · 25/08/2023 18:24

Currently in my fertile window so blindsided by hormones.

We’re going on holiday in October somewhere lovely and it’ll be a shame if I can’t enjoy a couple of cocktails. We’ve never been to somewhere as luxury as the holiday we have booked, so the plan had always been enjoy that holiday then TTC.

A huge part of me is saying to go for it now and that having a drink doesn’t matter. DH happy to do whatever I want to do and doesn’t think it makes a difference much. The downside might be that I feel rough. I think the odds are against feeling or being sick, given I didn’t suffer from HG previously and neither has any relative on my maternal side in any of their pregnancies.

I am a massive worrier and overthinker and again no history of loss in family and still <30 but would be worried if I miscarried it might ruin the holiday.

What would you do?

OP posts:
Kaceeee · 25/08/2023 18:35

me personally, I would. You, may not. Just think of it as do you really want too, would you rather a drink or have a baby earlier. I wouldn’t worry about loss, it’s a tragedy when it happens but obviously we can’t plan our lives around what may happen. Whatever you decide, I hope it goes well

Original poster
cheesetriangles · 25/08/2023 19:02

Kaceeee · 25/08/2023 18:35

me personally, I would. You, may not. Just think of it as do you really want too, would you rather a drink or have a baby earlier. I wouldn’t worry about loss, it’s a tragedy when it happens but obviously we can’t plan our lives around what may happen. Whatever you decide, I hope it goes well

Thank you xx

OP posts:
Ivyusername · 25/08/2023 19:10

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

favouriteyellowsocks · 25/08/2023 19:17

Start TTC on the holiday!

porppa · 25/08/2023 19:26

100% wait! I would have said the complete opposite a few years ago but now I realise those experiences are few and far between once you have kids and just need to cherish them! Really truly just enjoy your holiday!

KatieJ345 · 25/08/2023 22:51

To over another perspective, I was in the same position over a year ago and knew I was ready for a baby. We put off trying for a couple of holidays and work reasons but the reality is most people don’t get pregnant right away. When we did get pregnant we then lost it at 13 weeks and now back to square one. We are now pregnant again but no idea if this one will work out. I wish I would have just TTC straight away when we were ready as we assumed it would happen for us quickly and work out first time.

applesandmares · 26/08/2023 00:08

I'd put it off because I've experienced pregnancy loss and wouldn't want to be away from a hospital 'in case' - I appreciate the facts are different for you.

Have you checked out Zika virus for the place you're going? Just mentioning it in case you haven't heard about it, but I think the rule is to avoid TTC for a few months after visiting a country with Zika.

CurlyWurly1991 · 26/08/2023 08:41

I would hold off and start TTC while on holiday. Have a lovely time!

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 26/08/2023 08:42

It's only a couple of months... I'd enjoy those cocktails.

CurlewKate · 26/08/2023 08:44

Wait.

Friggingfrog · 26/08/2023 08:45

I’d enjoy the cocktails and then ttc

NewCracker · 26/08/2023 08:52

100% wait.
If you do conceive now and can't drink until your heart is content or eat certain foods or are suffering from such bad sickness that you aren't actually able to go (genuinely happened to me) then you will forever wish you waited just a couple more months and thoroughly enjoyed that last holiday for just you and your other half. It's just a couple months and that really won't do anything in your journey of TTC. But this holiday will be something you and your other half hold onto forever as the last one as a couple before you next chapter of lovely family ones. I understand the urge and desire to be pregnant, but now that I'm a mum, I would definitely want to have enjoyed one last luxury holiday with my DH.

Peony654 · 26/08/2023 08:53

It’s on a matter of weeks, just wait and start trying on holiday.

Peony654 · 26/08/2023 08:54

Oh and as PP said - hopefully would all be fine but having had a loss, I wouldn’t have wanted to be abroad for that.

needanotherhol · 26/08/2023 09:08

I would also suggest waiting and start TTC on holiday. I am currently pregnant but suffering from HG and it's no fun going on holiday and not being able to drink or sit in the sun because the heat made it worse.

I previously had a MMC a few weeks before going on holiday and was still so bloated and didn't feel my best in my bikini. I know that sounds vain but something else to consider.

Enjoy your holiday and good luck for your TTC journey x

Chanel05 · 26/08/2023 09:10

I'd wait! You might not have HG but still feel rotten from morning / 24 hour nausea and or sickness. Enjoy your holiday as a last hurrah!

HamishTheCamel · 26/08/2023 09:11

As it's just a few weeks I'd wait.

howshouldibehave · 26/08/2023 09:17

given I didn’t suffer from HG previously and neither has any relative on my maternal side in any of their pregnancies.

It’s not HG or nothing though, is it? 😂

You could quite feasibly be throwing up a lot (without it being HG), teary, not eating much, wanting to sleep all the time etc

You mention a previous pregnancy-did that end in a loss or do you have a child already? My first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage and I wasn’t sick at all-I was sick with the pregnancies resulting in my children though.

I’d wait and enjoy the holiday :)

peasblue · 26/08/2023 09:24

As you're less than 30 and have been pregnant before I'd absolutely hold off until after the holiday.

WimbyAce · 26/08/2023 09:24

You say you are still young so I would wait til hols, is only a couple of months. Having said that I travelled both times in early pregnancy and no issues whatsoever. We had been ttc for years both times though so I just happened to get pregnant before planned trips.

YaWeeFurryBastard · 26/08/2023 09:29

We’re in almost exactly the same boat and we are waiting until after our mega holiday at the end of the year and I’m very early 30s so slightly older than you!

I completely get how you feel and I also get the urge to just go for it, but I do think I’d be worried on the holiday and symptom spotting for signs of anything going wrong which could spoil it, not to mention what if I get bad morning sickness etc. On top of that we’re travelling to a remote destination so not sure if trust the medical care if anything were to happen.

I’m just trying to treat the time between now and then as a bit of a last hurrah and enjoy lots of lazy pub lunches and cocktails with my friend, not to mention loads of quality time with my husband.

YukoandHiro · 26/08/2023 09:31

Honestly I would say wait. We had a lovely holiday planned and had been TTCing for almost a year. I saw this holiday as a chance to just forget it all and enjoy ourselves as a couple. By chance I found out I was pregnant and then and miscarried early days while I was abroad. It was painful and anxiety inducing, plus I felt unwell for the entire trip.
Enjoy your holiday then come back relaxed and get stuck in this winter 👍🏻

Hibiscrubbed · 26/08/2023 09:45

Can’t you have fun on holiday and get super pissed and ‘try’ then?

USaYwHatNow · 26/08/2023 10:05

Having holidayed in Mauritius pre baby, and experienced grim morning sickness that lasted all day, I would've been absolutely gutted if circumstances would've meant I was early weeks pregnant while on that holiday 😂

It was such a lovely holiday, and we were out exploring and on trips for some of it, which I know I wouldn't have managed. Just walking the dog used to make me dry heave, and that was in the cold English weather, never mind tropical heat making it worse. I could also eat what I wanted, when I wanted and we had some amazing tasting menu dinners which again, I just wouldn't have kept down 😐

On a sadder note, I actually miscarried my 1st pregnancy, which was identified by falling HCG levels. It then took 2 days for the miscarriage to actually start, and I remember feeling really panicky as I was due to fly out to a European country for a 4 day city break. As it were, it was completed before I flew, however I still had residual hormones and I was tearful and vommy a lot of the time. Again, I wouldn't want to risk either scenarios for the sake of waiting a couple of months, though I completely understand the urge and need.

curliegirlie · 26/08/2023 10:53

I'd go for it now, but then my TTC journeys have been 16 months, 12 months and currently on something like month 15 with this one....