All I want is a baby!!!!

[SunshineS1]

Just a quick post for a rant/chat really... me and my partner have been trying for nearly 18 months now with absolutely no hint of a bfp. Have started investigations with our GP, I've had my day 3 and day 21 blood tests all looked normal. Currently waiting for the results from parents sa within the next week or so.

It's on my mind every single day, I want nothing more than to have a baby. Some days I'm more positive about it than others but it's always on the back of my mind. I've got no support as I haven't told anybody around us that we're ttc, let alone have been trying for 18 months.

Is anybody else in the same boat?! Has anyone got any positive stories for conceiving after this time?

Just want a chat really, anybody is welcome x

After 2.5 years of trying I'm currently 6 weeks. Completely out of the blue BFP this month with a phonecall to say we are at the top of the IVF waiting list just a week later ironically (I have a blocked tube).

Things honestly can happen when you least expect it. Over Christmas I was eating rubbish, being lazy, not taking vitamins, drinking more alcohol, only DTD 3 times in that month and had Covid so the odds were not in my favour but it happened.

The wait is awful, the feeling of failure and disappointment when AF arrives time after time when you've had every symptom under the sun is horrendous but don't give up hope 💕. Try and stay distracted and try to not put your life on hold in the mean time.

@Chlo1995

I’m in the same boat, been trying for around 9 months… my bestfriend gave birth to her third baby in September, I’m obviously very happy for her and love all her children to bits BUT I can’t help be devastated by the fact none of these children were planned and she seems to be the most fertile person I’ve ever met (3 children in under 6 years, it’s gutting😩)

I even tell her (in a jokey way) that she needs to let me have a go next… she fully agrees as she now has her hands full😂

I just really want it to be me next and can’t help but feel slightly annoyed by it😔x

It's so upsetting isn't it, you can't help but feel jealous/upset no matter how happy you are for them!!! Honestly I'm so close to deleting social media at this point, I hate the jealous side of me but I can't take it anymore🤣 I really hope you get a bfp soon, fingers crossed it's not too far away but always here for a chat x

I hear you!

Only x4 cycles so far but have found out I have an issue which will likely affect implantation, so we'll keep trying but it feels hopeless. IVF will be ruled out due to this too I believe.

DP has children from previous relationship so it upsets me to think that we may never have a child together.

Also in agreement that social
Media can make things harder, whilst being happy for friends it's still tough to see pregnancy announcements.

@Gemster19

The point of that absolute essay 🙈 was to tell you not to lose hope - when I had my MC I was convinced I'd be pregnant again in 3 months, then 6, then that there was no way I wouldn't be pregnant by a year, and by 2 years I'm sure our chance of conceiving naturally according to the stats was down to something ridiculous like 2%.

By saying I stuck two fingers up at it in our last cycle is also in no way me saying 'Stop thinking about it/it'll happen when you least expect it/just have more sex' and all that crap people who have no idea what you're going through spout, but just to give yourself a break - you don't have to do everything perfectly every single day, or blame yourself if it doesn't happen that month when you had an extra cup of coffee or missed your vitamins one day!

Aw wow!!! I'm so happy for you, congratulations! Honestly I started to tear up reading that, thank you! I've been looking to book a little weekend away for me and my partner just for us to get away and take our mind off things but the prices of getaways at the moment are shocking! It's our anniversary at the end of Feb so may just book a week off work and chill. I do have quite a stressful job and I can't help but feel this is affecting me in more ways than I even know so I think a week off would do me good anyway! I very rarely take time off so sort of feel guilty doing it🤦🏻‍♀️😂 I hope everything goes well for you, can I ask if you know the gender?! X

@Belle2210

After 2.5 years of trying I'm currently 6 weeks. Completely out of the blue BFP this month with a phonecall to say we are at the top of the IVF waiting list just a week later ironically (I have a blocked tube).

Things honestly can happen when you least expect it. Over Christmas I was eating rubbish, being lazy, not taking vitamins, drinking more alcohol, only DTD 3 times in that month and had Covid so the odds were not in my favour but it happened.

The wait is awful, the feeling of failure and disappointment when AF arrives time after time when you've had every symptom under the sun is horrendous but don't give up hope 💕. Try and stay distracted and try to not put your life on hold in the mean time.

Congratulations!!! I hope you have a happy and healthy 9 months! Thank you, it's nice to hear from so many lovely ladies and I'm definitely not the only one. I'm just gonna try to stay positive and hope it happens soon❤️

@beaverdiego

I hear you!

Only x4 cycles so far but have found out I have an issue which will likely affect implantation, so we'll keep trying but it feels hopeless. IVF will be ruled out due to this too I believe.

DP has children from previous relationship so it upsets me to think that we may never have a child together.

Also in agreement that social
Media can make things harder, whilst being happy for friends it's still tough to see pregnancy announcements.

I have everything crossed for you, honestly you hear things like this from others and then they end up getting pregnant naturally so I hope this is the case for you! Is there anything the doctors etc can do to help besides ivf, do you have any other routes you could try? X

I’m 7 cycles in and no sign of a BFP yet. Thinking of getting tests privately. We had my DHs SA done as that’s an easy and cheap one to do and rule out and he’s fine so any issue is on my end if there is one. Not sure when to start officially panicking but I think about it constantly and am quite worried. Also don’t talk to anyone except DH about it and a lot of people around me seem to be getting pregnant on their first month of trying

@polavary what did you do for SA? Did you go through gp?

@SunshineS1 thank you! We are so happy and so excited but I don't think either of us actually believe we're going to be parents in 4 weeks 😬😂. No we're having a surprise, its sort of been torture not knowing, but it's really adding to the excitement now (and I read it's a good incentive during labour 🤷🏻‍♀️).

Definitely have a break if you can - even if it doesn't physically make a difference we put ourselves under SO much pressure ttc, anything that makes you feel better is absolutely worth it.

One thing that I found made me feel better was when AF arrived I'd let myself wallow for a day and be really sad, and really bl**dy angry, and then the next day I'd force myself to think that, however it was going to happen, we were now a month closer to having our baby, rather than focussing on how many months in we were.

@SunshineS1 it’s very frustrating and I can’t for the life in me not think about it, the constant “oh stop thinking about it and it’ll happen” or the “maybe you should start eating a bit better” is just very very tiring to listen to😂

Ovulation is today so I’m entering my tww tomorrow and I’ve done more bd that I think I have in my whole adult life😆 so I’m keeping everything crossed!

Good luck to all of you ladies, I hope we get our bfp’s soon!🤞🏼x

They found out I had a high number of NK cells in my uterus which was easily treated with some low dose steroids. This was a private test I had done by Professor Siobhan Quenby. You’ll find some info on it all if you Google it. Interestingly I also have a history of overactive thyroid. Do you have graves?

@polavary

I’m 7 cycles in and no sign of a BFP yet. Thinking of getting tests privately. We had my DHs SA done as that’s an easy and cheap one to do and rule out and he’s fine so any issue is on my end if there is one. Not sure when to start officially panicking but I think about it constantly and am quite worried. Also don’t talk to anyone except DH about it and a lot of people around me seem to be getting pregnant on their first month of trying

I really hope your bfp comes soon!! It doesn't get any easier but fingers crossed you don't have to wait too much longer 🤞 you're more than welcome to message me if you need a chat, it's definitely something I need too!! There's nothing worse than going through it alone xx

@SunshineS1 I feel your pain. We're on cycle 43. I can't even believe I just wrote that. Fuck. I've had surgery for a cervical cyst, I've been on clomid and progesterone, Dh has has SA, I've had a tubal patency test. All perfect. But still no baby. I hope it happens for you soon.

[quote Gemster19]@SunshineS1 thank you! We are so happy and so excited but I don't think either of us actually believe we're going to be parents in 4 weeks 😬😂. No we're having a surprise, its sort of been torture not knowing, but it's really adding to the excitement now (and I read it's a good incentive during labour 🤷🏻‍♀️).

Definitely have a break if you can - even if it doesn't physically make a difference we put ourselves under SO much pressure ttc, anything that makes you feel better is absolutely worth it.

One thing that I found made me feel better was when AF arrived I'd let myself wallow for a day and be really sad, and really bl**dy angry, and then the next day I'd force myself to think that, however it was going to happen, we were now a month closer to having our baby, rather than focussing on how many months in we were.
[/quote]
Hahaha I can imagine it is an incentive! How exciting, I bet it's been torture not knowing😂 one day closer to finding out though, definitely keep me updated!! I need to know now too!

Some months are worse than others for me, I have got things coming up that will definitely take my mind off it and most times I am pretty positive. I just don't know what's going on with me the past few weeks, it's really taking its toll on me and really is starting to get to me. I had a bit of a wobbler the other day to my partner and said "I honestly can't picture being a mum anymore" it's just been so long😓

I just hope we don't need to go down the ivf etc route and it happens naturally💕

[quote Chlo1995]@SunshineS1 it’s very frustrating and I can’t for the life in me not think about it, the constant “oh stop thinking about it and it’ll happen” or the “maybe you should start eating a bit better” is just very very tiring to listen to😂

Ovulation is today so I’m entering my tww tomorrow and I’ve done more bd that I think I have in my whole adult life😆 so I’m keeping everything crossed!

Good luck to all of you ladies, I hope we get our bfp’s soon!🤞🏼x[/quote]
Good luck to you, please keep me updated!!!

I'm waiting for ovulation now, only on cd7 so still got another few days yet but I am honestly praying everyone gets their bfp soon.

If you ever need to talk just drop me a message!! 💕

@SunshineS1 I definitely will, I’m hoping it’s my time!🤞🏼

Let me know how you get on!x

@Ilikecheeseontoast

They found out I had a high number of NK cells in my uterus which was easily treated with some low dose steroids. This was a private test I had done by Professor Siobhan Quenby. You’ll find some info on it all if you Google it. Interestingly I also have a history of overactive thyroid. Do you have graves?

Ah I see, I've not been diagnosed with Graves. Luckily my thyroid is stable now, no longer need meds. I have asked the gp to check this twice and all came back good thankfully. It was an awful thing though, I was quite poorly from it for a while.

Do you still have an overactive? X

[quote sadnessoverwhelming]@SunshineS1 I feel your pain. We're on cycle 43. I can't even believe I just wrote that. Fuck. I've had surgery for a cervical cyst, I've been on clomid and progesterone, Dh has has SA, I've had a tubal patency test. All perfect. But still no baby. I hope it happens for you soon.[/quote]
Oh wow, I'm sorry! Are you any closer to finding out your next steps? Xx

It’s exhausting I’m tried also been 18months. Turned out thyroid prob. Had several chemicals and an mc. I just gave up and resorted to professional help. But they want to stick a camera up my bits and check it’s called hysteroscopy. Yet, no one is replying ..?!

@SunshineS1 thank you. No not really. I think I'm just done to be honest. I had a hysteroscopy and a d&c when I had the cyst removed, everything looks fine, there's nothing technically "wrong" but I just feel like I'm done. I'm 38, and I'm tired of thinking about it now. But still every month I'm
hoping..

@Sunsunny17

It’s exhausting I’m tried also been 18months. Turned out thyroid prob. Had several chemicals and an mc. I just gave up and resorted to professional help. But they want to stick a camera up my bits and check it’s called hysteroscopy. Yet, no one is replying ..?!

It's crazy isn't it!! I'm still waiting for my referral to a fertility clinic for more investigations, waiting for partners sa results to come back. Other than that, there's nothing more we can do until Feb/march at the earliest.

Have you been waiting long? Xx

[quote sadnessoverwhelming]@SunshineS1 thank you. No not really. I think I'm just done to be honest. I had a hysteroscopy and a d&c when I had the cyst removed, everything looks fine, there's nothing technically "wrong" but I just feel like I'm done. I'm 38, and I'm tired of thinking about it now. But still every month I'm
hoping..[/quote]
I really hope you get a bfp soon, it's so heartbreaking. Sounds like you need a good pamper and you time!!!

If you need any support or just a chat, please feel free to message me x

@SunshineS1 thank you, likewise. It's much more helpful to talk to other people I'm the same boat than the well meaning "just relax and it'll happen" brigade!

[quote sadnessoverwhelming]@SunshineS1 thank you, likewise. It's much more helpful to talk to other people I'm the same boat than the well meaning "just relax and it'll happen" brigade! [/quote]
Exactly!! Sometimes "relaxing" just doesn't do it I'm afraid. I actually have tried that approach. Stopped opks, stopped tracking for a good 3-4 months. Only dtd when we felt like it and it still didn't happen so I just don't see it ever happening at this point x

@SunshineS1 I did the very same. It does t help, Dh and I rarely even discuss it anymore. (I should add my username is nothing to do with my ttc situation, I name changed to post on a thread about Ashling Murphy and forgot to change back)