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Conception

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Original poster

Is the withdrawal method safe-ish?

30 replies

crymeout · 17/01/2022 18:21

Hello,

My boyfriend pulled out this morning but in my opinion, it was too late as there was sperm outside my vagina (I couldn't feel anything inside but it was all over that area on the outside). He doesn't want any more children, I don't mind either way but I've made it clear I won't have an abortion. He was very casual about it, said there's no way that could end up with pregnancy and I said there is. Who's right and if it's me, is it unlikely? TIA.

OP posts:
Butterscotchbaby · 17/01/2022 18:23

We caught using this method!

GrazingSheep · 17/01/2022 18:24

It’s unreliable
Do you usually use condoms?

Original poster
crymeout · 17/01/2022 18:25

@Butterscotchbaby does that mean you became pregnant?

OP posts:
arethereanyleftatall · 17/01/2022 18:25

Well, he didn't withdraw in time, so how safe that method is probably only applies if it's done right, which it wasn't. I would think about your age, where you are in your cycle, and take the map if you don't want to be pregnant.

EmpressCixi · 17/01/2022 18:27

No, withdrawal method is not safe ish method of contraception. Why aren’t the two of you using any since he doesn’t want more children?

SecretDoor · 17/01/2022 18:27

Go to a pharmacy and get the morning after pill as soon as you can if you don't want to risk a pregnancy

gsaoej · 17/01/2022 18:27

You can easily get pregnant like this.

shakeitoffshakeacocktail · 17/01/2022 18:27

Possible, more likely if you were ovulating. There is also debate about pre-cum.

If near the end/ start of your cycle unlikely

What is your normal birth control

SmallElephant · 17/01/2022 18:27

We've used it for ages and never had an unplanned pregnancy, but this one sounds too close for comfort to me!

Where are you in your cycle? Can you get the morning after pill?

Original poster
crymeout · 17/01/2022 18:29

I have no idea where I am in my cycle as I continuously take medication that prevents me from having a period but isn't a contraceptive so it's no help Sad

OP posts:
NoSquirrels · 17/01/2022 18:29

Morning after pill.

More reliable contraception.

Everybody knows the withdrawal method is not ‘safe’.

I assume you don’t track your cycle?

Go get the MAP.

MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 17/01/2022 18:29

Safe-ish? Grin

Muststopeating · 17/01/2022 18:30

Well I'm currently feeding DC3 who is the result of the withdrawal method. So no, its not at all safe.

Get the morning after pill and pick up some condoms while you're there.

ImInStealthMode · 17/01/2022 18:31

If he doesn't want any more children he needs either a vasectomy or a condom. End of story really.

HermioneWeasley · 17/01/2022 18:31

No, it isn’t. Why doesn’t he have a vasectomy if he’s adamant he doesn’t want kids?

burnthur5t · 17/01/2022 18:32

Worrying that an adult has to even ask this question

winterowl · 17/01/2022 18:32

What do they call people who use the withdrawal method?

Parents.

snowdropsandcrocuses · 17/01/2022 18:34

It was 'safe' for me for 9 years.....until it wasn't. And there was never any sperm 'on the outside of my vagina' that I was aware of.

It really genuinely isn't completely safe. Especially if there was sperm on your vagina. It literally takes a single spent. They can survive up to seven days in the vagina so there's never a safe time. There are times in your cycle that you can be 'safer' but if I were you I would think long and hard about what you would do if you conceive. If it isn't what you want, get the morning after pill.

Original poster
crymeout · 17/01/2022 18:35

@ImInStealthMode he's going to get one but obviously it's redundant if something happens before.

Usually use condoms but didn't have any left.

OP posts:
NotMyselfWithoutCoffee · 17/01/2022 18:39

If he didn't withdraw in time that's not the withdrawal method. Hmm
I'd say you have a 25% chance of pregnancy doing it unsuccessfully, if you do it reliably more like 5%

Esspee · 17/01/2022 18:40

You sound very young. Please get the morning after pill and a pack of condoms. They are not 100% safe but at least 100 times safer than withdrawal then see your doctor to discuss suitable contraceptive methods for you.
(and have a hard think about your boyfriend, he has children and lies to you about your chances of getting pregnant so doesn't sound like a keeper to me)

ImInStealthMode · 17/01/2022 18:43

@crymeout Are you prepared to be a single parent to a child that's saddled with a reluctant / uninterested father? If no, stop shagging him without a condom.

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 17/01/2022 18:43

Considering I fell pregnant while on the pill, I don't really trust any methods anymore.

AFAIK there is sperm in precum which in eked out during arousal for men so if there is no protection in place before you start having sex then there is a chance of pregnancy (however small).

Holothane · 17/01/2022 18:44

No no no no no no no no no.

ZoeTheThornyDevil · 17/01/2022 18:46

Some men secrete sperm in precum, and some don't. You only find out which your partner is when you get pregnant using the withdrawal "method".

All bets are off if he didn't actually withdraw in time though. Which he didn't this time.