Another tww. Anyone else feeling down/emotional?

[Everybodyfednobodydead]

So I'm 1dpo again today. I'm feeling awful tbh. Really depressed and down. I had a mmc in January and a chemical last month.
I started this cycle optimistic and eager but now the thought of another tww and symptom spotting etc is making me just want to curl up into a ball and hide away. I've been really snappy and tearful today. I know I'll be ok I just hate this part.
Just wanted a rant really and see if anyone else was feeling the same so we could support each other through this mine field

I'm so sorry you're feeling down @Everybodyfednobodydead I don't have any advice but I completely understand! The tww is shit. I'm currently 3dpo, we've been ttc since December and had mc at 9 weeks in March. I always feel really positive in the 2 weeks leading up to ovulation and then after that I feel really helpless and the wait seems endless!

So sorry to hear of your miscarriage. It's such a horrible experience.
I think when you get to the tww that's it. There's nothing more you can do. We can distract ourselves in the lead up with opks and timings etc then it's out of our hands.
Are you trying for your first?

Yes, me. 7dpo. Just found out after 13 months ttc, 5 chemicals and one mc that i have basically been poisoning myself with folic acid: i have the mthfr gene mutation (very common). My body cannot process folic acid so it builds up and actually could be causing my ttc difficulties as well as a whole other set of health issues. Really frustrating because you try to follow all the nhs advice and it’s wrong! I need to take methylfolate not folic acid! Why did no one tell me this before? I have wasted a year I don’t have (39 in July ttc #1). Sorry, needed to vent and maybe this info might help someone else!

Also, the 2ww is dreadful. I vote to ban it.

Please vent away. It's why I started this thread. I'm sorry to hear about what you've been through. Fingers crossed for this cycle for you. How have you found the last 7 days

I have been through all the stages of ttc and now I am just in the ‘meh get on with life’ stage. No longer monitoring every twinge. Bfps don’t excite me as I basically get a bfp each month since january that lasts 24 hours only.
This 2ww, I had a 5 day migraine post ov and feeling v hot and tired. Few cramps cd 6. Temp drop then and now rise 7-8dpo. Resigned is the main mood. Waiting on more detailed fertility clinic test results so assuming no successful cycles until treatment but at my age cannot not try ifyswim!

How are you doing today? Any symptoms? Anyone started testing yet?

Thanks @Everybodyfednobodydead sorry for being a grump, this ttc is a mindwarp

I get that non excitement feeling now to. Can't imagine one sticking now atm. I know we should keep positive but it's hard when you just end up disappointed.

No symptoms at all here but only 2dpo.
When are you planning on testing?

I start at 7dpo so yesterday and today. I have had bfps on 7dpo twice before so I want to know so I can keep a tally of all my chemicals.

I am allowed about ten mins of scrutinising for faint lines, no more obsessing - that was so Cycle 10! I have lost that now and even forgot to pee on a stick this morning. I think it is probably healthier than obsessing though!

I just wish I had the hope and innocence of those still at the beginning of ttc. I have lost that, mainly to be replaced with the thousand yard ttc stare....

I'm with you on the early testing. Last month when I had my chemical, 5 days after af was due I did another clearblue digi which came back not pregnant. Was devastated but it softened the blow when the blessing started the next day.
Oh yes I remember thinking it would happen straight away. I'd get pregnant then you know have a baby in 9 months.
We'll get there I'm sure. Just desperate to be pregnant by August as I would've been due then with the baby I lost at 11 weeks

@Sparrowsong

Also, the 2ww is dreadful. I vote to ban it.

THIS 👆🏻

You're completely right about feeling like there's nothing more you can do after ovulation @Everybodyfednobodydead I always tell myself I'm not going to test early but then start testing at 7dpo just for something to do! I use Internet cheapies so I can tell myself they're negative because it's too early and they're not sensitive enough. Then I spend all day going back to to check whether or not a line has appeared. This month I'm putting them in the outside bin so I can't waste my life staring at them for hours with a torch. TTC has turned me into such a weirdo!!

@Everybodyfednobodydead me too! I lost a pregnancy at 6weeks in Dec that would have been due in mid-August. I really want to be pregnant by then!

Yes to the internet cheapies. I also do multiple brands (two brands at a time) in case one of them is faulty

@Flopsy88 shall we start a petition?

Hello ladies, I'm very new to this site joined today, nice to meet you virtually. Wishing you all the luck and sticky baby dust on your journeys.

I'm also currently in the TWW, 8 DPO. I've started recording my symptoms on the fitbit app, started to feel suspicious symptoms this week then looked up what I inputted months ago and they are more or less the same symptoms before my period.. Wishful thinking is obviously affecting my memory!

I also used to use the early tests all the time but I think they made me more anxious and obsessed so for the sake of my mental health I don't have any at home starting this month... Let's see how that goes!

Not sure if anyone else has had irregular periods lately but it doesn't help when your hopes go up when it's late and the it's all over days later o_O

@Flopsy88 I'm also guilty of keeping tests and then checking for hours. Keep telling myself it's because they're not fully dry 🙄
Haha yes to 2 types of internet cheapies just in case. Why do they have to come in such large numbers. Makes it much easier to test obsessively. I'm so glad it's not just me. I'm a 30 year old professional woman but when it comes to this I'm a freak

How’s everyone doing?

12dpo - Vv faint bfp has lasted a few days and a smidge darker (but still faint). Cue desperate scramble to get some progesterone prescribed by my clinic. Not getting hopes up yet, been through this too many times!

@Sparrowsong That sounds so stressful, I really hope you got your progesterone and it works out for you 🤞🏻 Which tests are you using?

I'm 8dpo and think I saw a shadow of a line on an IC this morning (but honestly could just be seeing things). I also had an almost positive OPK which is unusual at this stage in my cycle

Can I join please? I'm 5 DPO, had a MMC last July, had another miscarriage in March and now been trying properly since after the miscarriage and nothing (conceived first time for each of the pregnancies). Convinced that the D&C has damaged me or something, or that I'm just too old now. Already thinking about testing at the weekend but I don't want to be miserable and anxious all weekend when I get a BFN. How anyone is conceived and born is a bloody miracle!

Hi @DappledOliveGroves I'm so sorry for everything you've been through. Two mcs must have been so hard, it's really unfair. It's a really good sign that you got pregnant so easily. I know it feels like a lifetime but March wasn't that long ago. I also had a miscarriage in March (2nd full cycle since) and got my BFP today but it's super early so I'm not getting my hopes up just yet

Oo fingers crossed @Flopsy88 that it progresses.
I'll be 8dpo in 20 minutes 😂 nothing to report except cramps. Not so much af ones but trapped wind ones.
When's everyone testing next? I did this morning and this afternoon but obviously bfn

@Sparrowsong thats so exciting. So happy for you. Wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months

@SBeeches I'm the same using tests early. It honestly turns my crazy and can so hard on your mental health

@DappledOliveGroves so sorry about your mmc. It is such a hard thing to go through. Wishing all the luck

Thanks everyone. I'm now 7 DPO. Don't think I have any symptoms of anything at all. Planning on testing at the weekend but don't want to face more disappointment or anxiety.

I'm trying to be zen and accept that things happen or don't happen for a reason but it's so hard.

Well after getting strong and darker lines yesterday morning, my period started in the afternoon and testing bfn.

My 6th chemical of 2021! After a mc in Dec. I just cannot seem to hold onto them. Maybe I should take heart that this one lasted as long as 4 days... Waiting on full testing results so hopefully will find out more.

God luck and baby dust to all still in with a chance this cycle

@Sparrowsong I'm so sorry lovely, that is really shit. I hope you're ok xx

How's everyone doing? I stupidly POAS with an FRER yesterday at 8DPO which was a BFN. Used an internet cheapie today and nothing. Feel so bloody disheartened even though the odds of a positive are negligible. My approach at being zen is failing miserably 😂