Preconception planning - anyone want to join?

[sunflowersaremyfav93]

Hello!

I've been reading loads on the importance of pre-conception nutrition and preparing your body. Some say 3 months before and I've seen some that say 6 months before.

I find myself trawling through threads on Mumsnet but wondered if there were any ladies planning to start TTC in the next few months and wanted a forum to chat about ways to prepare / excitement of it all etc.

I often find myself going on to my bf and mum and they're like ok ok! 😂

@queenatom thank you! I have never been on contraception of any sort. Thankfully, no medical conditions either (had a low vitamin D count last year). Should I be combining coq10 with a prenatal? Is there anything else I should be taking? I was going to go for the MyKind Pre Natal Gummies (since I cannot swallow pills).

Are there other women on here in their mid-30s? (Please say yes or I might cry!) :D

@TheNewMrsW yea I feel like ntnp will be no stress! Crazy though to think that’s actually potentially going to be happening 🥰

@queenatom it’s so nice isn’t it :) that’s a good idea re the caffeine etc. I haven’t been actually using opks yet but based on cm I think mine is quite short too so please let me know how it goes :)

@sa222 welcome :) think a lot on here are using folic acid and vitamin d :) also a range of ages :)

@sa222 Welcome! I'm 33 and in my 2nd month of TTC. You absolutely need to start taking folic acid and vitamin D but lots of other options too. A lot of us have read impatient women's guide to conceiving. Lots of info in there about vitamins and diet etc.
Is there a reason you're waiting for a few months?
If you've not been on hormonal contraception, I would start tracking your cycle straight away so you have a good idea of when you ovulate and length of luteal phase. That will give you a good starting point.

@butterfly5291 so exciting that you are actually ttc now have you done anything different since starting :)? X

Silly question... can somebody explain the luteal phase please and benefits of extending it? I recall it slightly in the book.

I'm also going to start opks tomorrow as have stopped bleeding, do any of you use an app to measure them?

Hope you've all had a lovely weekend so far, how nice is it that we have the extra day!!

Thank you for all the books recs too I'm going for normal people... and I agree love the name Connell!!

@mackjm20 well I pretty much started tracking using bbt and OPKs as soon as I got my coil out 4th July. I did eat pineapple this month, including the core which is meant to help with implantation. Might do a test on Wed/Thurs.

@sunflowersaremyfav93 luteal phase is after ovulation and before period. If your luteal phase is too short then could cause issue with implantation, because this doesn't normally happen till 8-10 days post ovulation. Glad you've had a lovely weekend

Ah great, thanks you @butterfly5291 😊 I'll start tracking

@butterfly5291 @mackjm20 hello! Thank you for the welcome :) I did not know what temping ovulation is, but have looked it up. The reason for waiting is that I am not yet married, but want to plan ahead to be able to start right away. I already feel old and wish I had been sensible a few years ago about this, instead of felling so panicked! Thank you for the book suggestion, I have just ordered it! I have noticed that my usual multivitamin has 100% serving of folate, so I will order folic acid drops, I think, separately. I assume there is no specific way to take these? Full disclaimer, I am very new to this and am already learning lots, But have no idea what most of the terminology means! A question though: my partner is 42. Aside from getting checked for sperm count, should I be getting him to do anything else to prep? Thank you!

@sa222 when are you due to get married? I'm meant to be getting married at the end of December but decided to just start trying now as it might take months anyway and didn't know what the wedding situation would end up being.
You could get him some well man vitamins for reproduction, the zinc and selenium are good for sperm.

@sa222 Hi and welcome! I'm trying to get my partner to have some Brazil nuts everyday, apparently the selenium is good for sperm health... trying to get him to cut down on alcohol too and stop smoking but he keeps having the odd few cigarettes when he goes to the pub which reallllly irritates me!! Will probably buy some of the wellman vitamins for him to take as well.

@sunflowersaremyfav93

“The luteal phase is one stage of your menstrual cycle. It occurs after ovulation (when your ovaries release an egg) and before your period starts. During this time, the lining of your uterus normally gets thicker to prepare for a possible pregnancy.”

So for me my cm would suggest I ovulate late in my cycle and then my af comes quite soon after. So benefit to longer is higher chance of implantation :)

I’m going to give opks ago this cycle too just to try and see if my ovulation prediction is right!

@butterfly5291 Oo I didn’t know about the pineapple :) good luck for the test :) Keeping everything crossed for you :)

@sa222 I think there are certain foods you can eat which are good and cutting down on caffeine :) try not to panic not long to wait now and your wedding will be wonderful I’m sure :)

Xxx

Question for today (as my mind was running overdrive last night) how much does everyone have saved/ think they will need to have saved for all the bits you need to buy for a baby? Xx

@sa222 Welcome! Don’t worry, I’m 35 and due to start TTC our first in January. I am conscious of age but everything I read says that the statistics for fertility of women in their mid-30s are much better than the media etc would have you believe 😊

I would read as much as you can the next few months and start trying to get an idea of your cycle and when you ovulate so that when you are ready to try you are in the best position you can be. Start taking pre-natals too 😊

I think that’s a “how long is a piece of string one”! There are certain things you do need but people do spend a lot of money on things that aren’t essential. I’ve read a few articles and blogs about this and my takeaway was that the big ticket items are pram/stroller, car seat and crib/cotbed. You can save a lot of money if you buy certain things second hand (if you don’t mind doing that) but it isn’t recommended to buy second hand car seats and cribs/cots you should always buy a new mattress. Other things like a changing table are nice if you have the money/space but aren’t essential.

It depends how high end you want to go too. The pram is the big one IMO, the really nice ones are the best part of £1000 😳. We were in IKEA a couple of weeks back and I noticed they have some nice nursery furniture that didn’t cost the earth, though I like the look of some of stuff in John Lewis lol

My bigger concern is saving up enough that I can afford to be off on ML, I would only get stat MP and I earn quite a lot more than DH ...

@mackjm20 Thank you! I think I def need to start the tracking because I'm not entirely sure when I ovulate and how long for. Omg last night my mind was on overdrive too and I was thinking the exact same thing! So I did a little table on my notes and worked out everything we'd need to buy (let me know if you'd like me to hire you with the list lol), mum has kindly offered to buy our pram for us because she bought my SIL a pram for my niece. But yeah my main concern in mat pay to be honest, my boyfriend will obv have to take on more bills etc but I just keep worrying and don't want it to be a burden if that's makes sense, so I've worked out that in addition to my mat pay from work I'd need another £850 ish supplemented from my savings which isn't so bad so I'm putting away £500 a month atm with the view that by the time I get to mat leave I have enough to last me the 9 months where I get 40% of my pay. My mat leave policy is full pay for 12 weeks and then 40% for the remaining time.

I am such a worrier about money though, my bf came home on Saturday after going to the gym, he'd walked to oxford street after and got himself some aftershave and me some perfume, spending £100 and I was sooooo grateful but I was kinda like OMG £100 that's a lot of money but he's all like we're not poor it's only £100 ... Ying and Yang lol!

My thinking is that if I save enough to cover the mortgage and our car payments for 6 months, DH’s wages should then cover other bills and outgoings and my mat pay would then be for extras, we’ll see how my saving goes the next few months! No Christmas presents for anyone this year 😂

So my question of the day - fertility monitors. Anyone got one, anyone thinking of getting one? I was sceptical but she seems to rate them in the Impatient Woman alongside other methods .... and I am definitely an Impatient Woman lol!!! I’m trying not to get too carried away or put too much pressure on myself but there is also a part of me that thinks I’m already 35, we want at least two kids and a couple years between each one... the longer I am ttc #1 the older I will be ttc #2 if we are so lucky... so thinking I’m willing to throw the kitchen sink at trying to get pg quickly! Thoughts?

@mackjm20 when I had my DD I saved about £1000 for buying stuff. I didn't want to spend thousands on a pram and managed to get it on a good deal. I also up cycled the wardrobe and chest of drawers for the nursery.
This time we won't need to make as many big purchases because we already have a lot of it. I will need to buy a new next to me sleeper/crib though because we borrowed that from a friend and just bought a new mattress.

I don't even know what a fertility monitor is @TheNewMrsW. What does it entail?
I also had about £3000 saved by the time I went on maternity so that I wouldn't be skint once my wages dropped down.

@Pebbleinthesand there are various types but I was looking at the ClearBlue one, it’s basically the same as an OPK in that you POAS but you then stick the stick in the machine and it interprets the results for you and tells you when you are peak fertility, rather than you having to guess whether the line is peak LH or not. They are pricey though!

@TheNewMrsW Wow sounds very high tech! Although peeing on any stick more than a pregnancy test seems high tech to me where this is concerned. Really hoping I won't need to worry about that stuff, I think I'd be rubbish at it😂

@TheNewMrsW I used my sister's old CB fertility monitor this month and bought some sticks off ebay. I liked it because you do it every morning and I didn't catch my peak on the cheap ooks...yes I did both out of interest but really if you use cheap ooks and bbt tracking then you will have a pretty good idea if when your peak was. My advice would be to DTD as much as possible once you start getting a darker line on OPKs until bbt proves you've ovulated. Will likely only be 2-3 days a month x

@Pebbleinthesand I know what you mean, part of me thinks it’s a bit OTT but another part of me doesn’t want to be sat here this time next year thinking goddammit I should have pee’d on every damn thing I could get my hands on 😂

@butterfly5291 Thanks 😊 yeah that’s what I’m planning to do, just toying with throwing a monitor into the mix as well

Definitely agree with that @TheNewMrsW! If after a few months of trying I'm not getting anywhere with my laid back attitude I'm sure I'll be peeing on anything that might help 😂

Ooh they are pricey aren't they, just had a look, it apparently they do increase chances?!