TTC during the coronavirus outbreak thread

[helia]

Is anyone still TTC at the moment?

We were planning to start trying for our second next month or the month after but I'm not sure it's the right thing to do any more.

Is anyone in the same boat and thinking about pushing things back a few months (or more)? It would be nice to chat to others who are deciding what to do now too.

Following 😁

That's such a helpful link @helia, thank you! Answers a few questions, and it's just nice to see the dilemma acknowledged somewhere.

@Unjani I know - I probably should have asked for clarification! I think I'm going to wait for late July/August, they to see my GP and go from there. I'm hoping that the advice won't be to wait for months, but given what happened in my first pregnancy, it feels sensible to discuss it with a medical professional! I'm in a region where the R rate is increasing, so we may be mid-second wave in a couple of months anyway.

Bloody wish this virus would bog off. Hate this!

Hello!
Just wondered how everyone was doing and if anyone had changed their minds on this?
Currently in TWW here 🤭 xx

Hi @RoEP2018, yep we are also in the two week wait! We decided to go for it. I know we're not out of the woods yet regarding Covid but it does seem things are slowly returning to normal. Plus we live in the area of the UK that has had the least cases, so we feel a bit safer here. Good luck with everything!

Hello, I read this thread with great intent as we also struggled to decide what to do. We are now also in the 2ww! How did it go for you @Unjani and @RoEP2018?

We've decided to start next month now so also moving forward. How is everyone else getting on?

@FL95 we've just found out I'm pregnant! I haven't phoned the doctor to tell them yet...

@Unjani congrats, very exciting news!
@Quercus3 exciting, good luck! It's so nice to hear others are going through the same thing,I have made myself really anxious over making that decision and felt really alone with it! And if it's negative this time I'll probably go through the same doubts again next month :D

Just thought I'd update. I have now phoned the midwifery unit to tell them I'm pregnant and they were, of course, lovely.

The midwife I spoke to said that currently only women are allowed to appointments and scans but things are changing frequently. She also said that things are starting to get back to normal.

So all in all, I'm feeling quite positive and relieved.

Hope everyone else is doing ok?

Congratulations @Unjani, lovely news 🙂 glad that it's all going well so far and you're feeling positive.

@FL95 it's comforting knowing others are in the same boat isn't it. Hope everything is going well for you?

@unjani, thank you so much for the update!
I got a faint line today at 13DPO so I feel like it may be happening Ahhh!

@Quercus3, are you still planning for next month?

@FL95 ah that's so exciting! Sounds very promising, congratulations 🙂 how lovely to have it happen so quickly

Yes, I should've said next cycle instead of next month - currently going into my fw 😊

Hi everyone, I'm so glad I stumbled across this thread as I've been searching everywhere for opinions/info on this! We had started TTC for our first baby at the start of February this year and then put the brakes on as the situation started deteriorating. We had thought that there would be a clear point after a few months where it was obvious that it was safe again, how laughable that seems now!

It's been so helpful to read the thread and see everyone's opinion slowly changing as things have got better. I just wondered where everyone is now? Do you all feel it's 'safe' enough again? And anyone that is expecting, how are you finding it? What is your care like now?

Any help much appreciated as I just feel completely at a loss, what is the best thing to do?!
Thanks, and so glad to have found Mumsnet.

@BT701 welcome!
Still at a loss here. After two faint lines in July, my period ended up arriving a week later.
We decided not to try in August as I needed a break from the stress of wondering if this was the right thing to do.
I have never been so torn about anything in my life!

@FL95 I'm so sorry to hear you've been so stressed and you must have had a whirlwind of emotions with the faint lines before your period. I hope having a break during August helps 🙂

I'm with you, I've never been so confused about what the right thing to do is. There are so many arguments for and against! I've been wanting to TTC for about 18 months now, so the disappointment of stopping after the joy of deciding to go for it has been quite hard. I think it would be easier if there was a definitive end date to work towards, but right now it feels like this is just how it's going to be now! However, it has definitely helped finding this today and seeing how many others are in the same position.

Welcome @BT701

Sorry to hear about your period arriving @FL95, and that you are feeling so torn. Its such a huge decision isn't it.

We decided to go for it in the end, thinking that there is no good time really. We know quite a few couples who have had fertility issues and we didn't want to regret not trying earlier further down the line, if it took a while. However we caught right away! Got my BFP last week and am now 5+1 weeks gone, so will see if it sticks. Since getting the BFP, we've found out we'll need some unexpected house repairs (totalling in the thousands 😬) so we're no longer in the stable financial position we thought we were in. So that's been a little stressful as it's the equivalent to most of my maternity savings so far. I'm sure we will be ok but I've not had much sleep this week 😬 it does show that at the end of the day, no matter how much we plan, there's always a lot left to chance.

Best wishes to those of you still deciding what to do. I'm sure you will make the right decision for you.

Thank you both! I track my ovulation and felt so sad during my fertile window not to take advantage of it, I almost gave in!
But we are planning to travel in a couple of weeks to see my family (all my family is abroad and it's our only chance to see them this year) and I knew I'd want to cancel if we got pregnant and be facing even more impossible dilemmas! So it was best to park it for now and save myself the stress!

@BT701, sorry it has been a long time coming for you! Hopefully we have wonderful babies soon and we won't remember any of this! What does your partner think? Mine is desperate to TTC now and feels it's the right time so I feel a bit bad too for being the one delaying us.

I agree it feels that covid is here to stay, so I am not really sure what I am waiting for anymore, and at 35 I worry a lot about my fertility. I also wonder if my Covid risk would be higher next year as I will be commuting rather than working from home. I need a crystal ball!

@Quercus3, oh my god, congratulations! So good to hear the update. Sorry to hear it has been stressful though, for completely unforeseen reasons, life likes to keep us on our toes. I hope things get sorted and you can enjoy your pregnancy to the full. How are you feeling ? Any early symptoms ?

@FL95 That sounds really hard, but a really brave decision. Now you can see your family without the excess worry and it will be really special- this will all still be waiting for you when you get back. I hope you have the best time!

My husband is actually more cautious than me, it was his idea to put things on hold (though I did agree with him) and now neither of us really know what the right thing to do is.

@Quercus3 Wow, massive congratulations! That's great news. I'm sorry you've had things to worry about and really hope everything sorts itself out so you can really enjoy this time. Let us know how you get on!

Thank you both of you for the advice and understanding!

I actually thought it would be better to try now, since we are home a lot, and bound to be home a lot more for a lot longer. I thought it would be ideal for first trimester, not having to face colleagues etc. Bit gutted we haven't succeeded yet, exactly because the timing would have been so good! A way to make something nice out of a bad year.

@AnonymousXXIX that's a really interesting perspective and lots of good points! Thank you. I really hope everything goes well, keep us updated! 🙂

Also considering ttc and unsure what to do.

Am thinking of starting ttc in December but worried I won't be able to get my coil removed then if NHS under strain - should I get it removed now (anyone had any luck getting an appointment?) and use condoms until then?

Thinking it would be better for baby to be born in Summer as we could well have covid around in winter 2021 (but ideally want to avoid Aug baby for schooling reasons). But equally worried I will miss out on pre and post natal classes, baby classes etc once born and I may become quite isolated.

I have a thyroid condition so will need regular blood tests at the very least during my pregnancy. Worried I will not get the care required if they are cancelling appointments/scans, and will thus be putting myself at higher risk.

However if winter 2021 has a big covid episode I will still be in the same situation with prenatal care/classes. I'm not sure I want to wait another year or 2, especially if I cant make best use of that time with adult holidays and date nights with DH.

Career wise this is an ideal time for me & I expect if pregnant I will be asked to continue to work from home while covid still around which would be great (no train commute for a while longer saving me £5k a year).

I'm also aware all my plans may be worthless (and sound ridiculous) as this is baby 1 so no idea of my fertility and I could be facing years of trying (I'm only 30 so do have time yet).

So hard to make a decision.

Ideally I want to wait to see what happens after furlough ends in Oct and if me and DH still have our jobs (likely). We have around £10k in savings (inheritance) but little disposable income day to day really. But feel like I need to make a decision now because of coil removal.

@MrsHSW I can't comment on the coil really as I've never had one, but isn't it best to remove it a while before TTC so that your cycles can get back to normal? If so, and you're planning on trying in December, then maybe you should see if it could be removed sooner rather than later?

I think pre- and postnatal classes are being held online where possible, so I wouldn't worry about that. I had a very complicated first pregnancy and didn't end up going to any antenatal classes and our little boy is fine! We learnt as we went along. Your health visitor (and everyone and anyone else) will give you all the advice and tips you need (whether you want the advice or not!).

I needed regular check ups during the last pregnancy due to a large fibroid. I had over 20 scans and was transferred to 3 different hospitals. I am having my 12 week scan next week and will find out if the same damn fibroid is still there for this pregnancy. If it is then I'll need regular checks like last time- ante natal care won't be impaired due to Covid. You will still have your vital checks if you're high risk. Some standard appointments, however, might be done over the phone.

I'm in the very fortunate position of having very generous family and friends. Our little boy is almost 2 and we've hardly bought him any clothes because our parents have given us so much. Friends have given us hand-me-downs. Even things like baby-carriers we haven't had to buy ourselves as my brother has slightly older children so has given us stuff. Plus I breastfed for the first year so we didn't even spend money on formula. So for us (and I know we're very lucky and I sound really spoilt) we haven't spent an absolute fortune on the baby (if you're worried about finances).

Good luck on whatever you decide!

I have just started a thread on this as been worried. I am 37 and have a 7 year old. I'm ovulating every month as been checking my opk and temps etc but just worry about my age and I have left it too late but my anxiety around covid and the idea of a miscarriage or ectopic and getting high BP again and extra scans again would be really scary with all this going on.

@Unjani thanks, really useful to hear from someone who has experience on this, has put my mind at rest a bit. We've decided to ttc in December as planned. Re the coil - I had it removed in September. I was worried we would go into another lockdown and coil removals (which they had paused) might not be available if I waited. I had a non-hormonal coil so technically you can get pregnant straight away however did find my cycle was a bit out by a few days that month. The nurse said they usually recommend you wait one cycle. This also gave me a chance to speak to GP about medications and have my thyroid checked prior to ttc.
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It seems like after Boris' speech yesterday that they are going to implement rapid testing on labor wards so DH should be able to be there (which I know a lit of people have been worried about).