Self insemination - Any success stories?!

[TurkeyBasterHopeItWorks]

Hi everyone,

I have NC'd for this to save our blushes!
DH and I have just had our first round of IVF which was sadly unsuccessful after an early miscarriage.
We have 2 frozen embryos but we would like to TTC naturally for the next 6 month's first in the hope the IVF hormones might help boost our chances.
DH has always struggled to ejaculate inside me when DTD. Therefore we have decided to try self insemination in the hope it will take away some of the stress.

I would love to hear any success stories.

Also which insemination kit did you buy?

Has anyone tried a soft cup / Ferti Lily conception cup after inserting the syringe to help things along?

Thanks everyone!

@MrsKin90 sorry you’re feeling crappy but that’s totally understandable - TTC is so all-consuming at times and you invest so much emotionally only to be disappointed time and time again. That sucks. On top of that, because you’re so irregular, you have to do so much more work than some of us! If this was your best friend moaning to you, you would totally feel empathetic towards her - make sure you allow yourself that same level of understanding and love. I really think it will all work itself out for all of us, at some point, somehow. Big hugs! Are you doing anything nice this weekend to take your mind off it?

@AdriannaP lovely to hear from you! Glad you took some time off after the MC. My social media was flooded with BabyLossAwarenessWeek posts in the past few days. Makes me glad to see that ever so slowly we are starting to break the taboo around it but simultaneously made me think about the fact that I was supposed to be seven months pregnant today... my due date was mid december and I’m trying not to put pressure on myself but I think it will be a real dagger to the heart if that date comes and I’m not pregnant again...

Jeez what a downer of a message isnt it?? 😂 I’m 12DPO today, the longest I’ve gone without testing since starting ttc - so at least that’s one thing to be proud of! Hope all of you ladies are okay and wishing you a wonderful weekend xxx

@MrsKin90 @primrosechill thanks so much for welcoming me back ❤️

@primrosechill I know. It’s so hard isn’t it. My due date would have been early Feb I think and I keep thinking that I should still be pregnant. But trying to look positive into the future now and hope we have our positives soon. Good luck for when you decide to test. Xxx

@mrskin Big hug for you! Don’t beat yourself up, unfortunately it’s even harder for us and you have unregular cycles too. I have invested in the expensive clear blue opks, maybe that might help you. If it’s any consulation I fell pregnant twice with DTD only once that cycle. So it’s more about timing then quantity I think. Have a nice and relaxing weekend and be kind to yourself. Xxx

For the lady considering IVF, waiting lists in my area of England are very long now due to backlog from covid. Priority is given to the women who have frozen eggs already. I put myself on waitinf list in the summer just before I fell pregnant myself and was told 4-6 months waiting is a possibility. So if you consider it I would explore waiting lists in your area.

*meant to say frozen embryos of course

@eloiseislost that's an interesting technique. I'll give it a go when I'm next doom-mongering! I appreciate you taking the time to explain it to me. 😊 TTC takes over so quickly doesn't it? I always said I didn't want to be someone obsessed who took loads of supplements. I am both of those things 🤦I didn't go properly crazy until after it and been six months. That was the worst time for me until now.

@primrosechill It is a bit crappy isn't it? I try to find something to be thankful for every cycle, so I really can't complain that I've appeared to have ovulated so much earlier this cycle. Hopefully that's a sign and makes a difference! I think losing a baby is such an important thing for people to be able to talk about - you'd never feel taboo about losing any other form of loved one, and yet there's a secret pain around losing a baby before they're born. I can't imagine how painful it is for you. I hope you get your bfp and have some good news to get you through the next couple of months. Make sure you look after yourself ❤️ super well done on not testing yet. I am impressed! Not too long to go before you should test. Will you just wait it out and only test if no AF?

Thanks for your kindness and support lovelies 😊

@MrsKin90 I’m sorry you are feeling low... it’s expected with this journey. It sounds like you I on good days if that is when you ovulated this month. I normally ovulate on CD18 but a few months it’s been earlier and really thrown me off! Have you been more relaxed/stressed this cycle as sometimes that can delay or bring ovulation closer? I actually know how you feel with looking back we started ‘properly’ trying in August 2019 but when I look back out of the 15 months I would say about 10 of them we gave ourself a good chance which on one hand makes me feel better as my body hasn’t failed me 15 times it’s more like 10 but then mentally we have been on this ttc for the 15 months so it doesn’t make it feel any less time if that makes sense. Hopefully this is your month, I feel every month we try we are one month closer to having a baby one day 🤞 Try and stay calm through your tww and keep yourself occupied, sending lots of love x

@Lori23TTC thank you I really appreciate your kindness. I think earlier ovulation is probably a combination of my super long cycle (maybe my body reset itself??) And that I've been taking COQ10 and inositol? Maybe a bit hopeful to think they've had a part as I have no been using it for very long! I'm trying to have a more positive day today, as it's going to be a very long tww otherwise!! I suppose it's helpful to see the months from both perspectives, but it doesn't make the journey any shorter. Fingers crossed for us all!

How is everyone else? Sorry to bring such a mopey tone.

@MrsKin90 never apologise for your posts. You’re human and we’ll all feel ok or shit. Use this place to vent or cry safely among us who understand. I really do hope you feel ok. Smiling Mind is a wonderful app for meditation and mindfulness and helps pull me back into the ‘now’ and focus on smells, sounds etc. His voice is nice too on it!

@AdriannaP good to see you back, I hope you’re doing ok too? 💚

@eloiseislost thank you for asking 😊 I’m ok thank you, syringed four times this week but tbh two of those I struggled to orgasm as I’m just in a funny headspace a bit. I’m scared of the chemical (hate that actually should be early miscarriage 🙁) and that it’ll happen again.
My husband mum is having further check for a mass near her lungs and I have two pets with health issues.

I’m sorry to also have a moan but I just feel fed up. I’m having a quiet weekend and looking after myself. Getting husband to go out so I can just lay on couch and watch crap telly.

Big hugs to you all xx

@Oilyoilyoilgob thank you for the recommendation. I've got an app called Headspace which helps sometimes but I guess I have to remember to actually use it! Don't worry about not having an orgasm, I'm not sure how much difference it makes, I treat it as a perk of the situation more than a necessity! It sounds like you've got such a lot going on, I hope you're looking after yourself and enjoyed lots of crap tv. I love to binge watch crap I know my husband won't like when he's out!

@Oilyoilyoilgob I came across this recently: https://www.fatherly.com/health-science/female-orgasms-conception-fertility-science/ it explains the theory around female orgasm and fertility and quotes some recent research.

I'm not doing too well. Yesterday we went to see our new house (it's a new-build) and choose flooring and kitchen cabinets. I was so excited and it took my mind off of the 2WW. Until… the developer said we have the option of handle-less kitchen cabinets and DH said "I was thinking about that, handles can be a hazard for a toddler" That's the man who a year ago absolutely did not want any children!! And here I am, 11DPO, another BFN. I almost burst into tears, I don't know how I found the strength not to! From then on I was looking at this huge house and thinking, will it always just be us and our two cats in it?

Though, just to be clear, our cats are pretty awesome.

@MrsKin90 oh my goodness they are awesome! Beautiful 😍💖

Oh I’m so sorry you’re feeling shit, I really am. And yes all these crappy reminders and people talking like you just get pregnant at so much as a sniff of sperm (boak!!)
Bloody pisses me off.

We had exactly the same convo with our therapist about the size of our house and I feel I’ll just be rattling around in it with husband and pets 😞 I love my pets but I want a baby. We’ve had a tough few years that put me back on wanting to have children but now I’m kicking myself thinking ‘should’ve started years ago’

I think I’m going to book to see my own lovely therapist because I’m triggering myself into thinking about death/illness and a negative spiral.

I truly am sorry you’re struggling. But just think hopefully this planning for when you do have a baby WILL pull off and you and your house will be all ready. Smiling mind is good as they have meditations from 3 mins and nighttime ones so manageable. I often do the three minute one in my car when I’ve parked somewhere, it doesn’t feel like a chunk out of your time.

Wishing you a peaceful, kind Sunday xx

Ah wrong tag then forgot to double tag-sorry! @eloiseislost the cats are awesome!
Both of you look after yourselves xx

@MrsKin90 I'm sorry that you've been feeling low. This journey can be so difficult and I hope you feel stronger soon. Big hugs to you

I often get into a little black hole of analysis but I'm trying not to do it as it makes me feel worse. SI is new to us (only 2 cycles tried so far) but before that it's been about a year but not that many where we had any real chance due to timing. Going to try and focus on timing next cycle so I bought a thermometer for bbt, as well as cervix tracking and OPKs....
@eloiseislost I agree that my months seem to disappear into AF, trying to figure out Ov date, then syringes then 2ww!! It's like the Groundhog Day version of ttc...

AF started today - 2 days late and I had a flutter of hope but I was also sweating like a mofo at night and having nightmares which are my usual pmt symptoms so I kinda knew I was going to start ☹️
Onward and upwards. Fingers crossed for the next! Baby dust to everyone x

@bigsweetpotato my period started today as well. Wish we could be BFP buddies, not AF buddies ☹️ I woke up with cramps and then the flood gates opened - started the day with a little sob, gah. I knew we didn’t give it our all this cycle but also because we were on holiday and soooo relaxed, I was probably hoping it could have had a positive impact. My periods have been super short since the MC, 23-24 days. I keep telling myself my fertility results came back okay but I can’t help but worrying my lutheal phase is too short, or my eggs don’t mature enough or whatever - truly, I just need to stay off Google and stop diagnosing myself!!

@Oilyoilyoilgob my husband and I started looking at houses in the beginning of the year. Then when we had the MC, we went to a few more viewings and decided we were too heartbroken atm to look at anything with “a spare bedroom that can be turned into a nursery” - so we ended up putting it off for a bit. So my heart goes out to you - it’s supposed to be such a joy to get a new place but it must be so hard when all you want is to introduce a new tiny human to it...

Sending all lots of love. Feeling a bit anxious today. Blankets, TV, and a cuppa evening for me... x

Sorry, realised my comment above about the house was directed more at you @eloiseislost though @Oilyoilyoilgob i know you commented on it too ❤️

Thank you everyone for the kind words and, most of all, for understanding. TTC can be very lonely, it is comforting to know that people out there share similar experiences and emotions. I am lucky I found this forum!

Did a deep clean of the house, an hour of Pilates, and made a marinara sauce! So tonight it's pasta, non-alcoholic wine and crap TV!

@eloiseislost your cats are gorgeous! You WILL have babies to fill all the rooms in your house, we all will. Sounds like you've had a very productive Sunday!

@bigsweetpotato sorry AF got you ☹️ hope you're being extra nice to yourself. Hopefully OPKs and bbt etc help with timing this cycle for you!

@primrosechill I'm sure your tests would have flagged something if there was a problem wouldn't they? If you're worried there's no harm in contacting your doctor to ask is there? Loads of people conceive with shorter cycles. I take Seven Seas trying for a baby tablets as they have vitamin B6 in them and on the month or two I didn't take them my LP shortened by 2/3 days. Just a thought. Really sorry that your period has started. ☹️ treat yourself with extra gentle love and care. Blankets, hot water bottles, chocolates ❤️

We've been doing DIY today but all I really wanted to do was curl up and read all day! 5dpo for me! Going to try to immerse myself into life this week instead of day dreaming about nursery designs and baby shower cakes which is what I did for my last tww and didn't get much work done 😳😳

Hi everyone just to say I hope you all had a great Sunday. You all sound very productive hehe! Diy, making sauces, Pilates and deep cleaning 😮

I had all morning in bed (I’ve said this on other threads but cozee home bedding on qvc is the BEST), played on a game called ‘among us’ for hours 😳 and went out for Sunday lunch. Was a great lazy day!

I’m at the vets tomorrow the best I’ll hear is my lovely gentle cat will need an op, as the lump is the same place another cancerous lump was removed this year. Bloody hell.

Wishing everyone a great week ahead and lots of big hugs 💚 xx

@Oilyoilyoilgob I'm sorry to hear about your cat! It's always heartbreaking when they're unwell, isn't it? My cat has heaps of health issues. Last year, part his pancreas literally exploded and messed up his intestines. He is doing much better now but needs constant attention and supplements… A bit like me!
I hope it goes well at the vet. Cats are proper fighters, 9 lives and all!

Omg these cats are the cutest.

I really feel you all with rooms and looking at houses. It's all so hard.
I have one DC (5) and I kept all her baby stuff - so my garage and loft are full with pram, car seats, cots, travel cot, baby clothes, maternity clothes, changing table. Every time I look at all those things my heart breaks. The earliest I would use them now is next summer - I have kept everything for so long. I don't know if it's worth doing or if I should just give it all away. (or would that be even worse?)
My husband doesn't feel this way, but for me looking at all this stuff that is filling up our storage is just so heart breaking. (I had two MC - one last summer, one this summer)

Our DC also constantly asks for a sibling, complains that she has no children to play with. Every holiday or day out she asks for someone else to play with. It makes me feel like such a failure. we now book holidays with kids clubs (of course not possible with COVID now) so she had time with other children.

In the last two years, three of my work colleagues were also pregnant and on mat leave (we are a very small team too). and of course all my friends have had their second and sometimes third already.

I had a very difficult and traumatic childhood and I thought my adult life was good and happy. Now for the last years, I feel like I have entered a new ongoing struggle which has led to depression, sadness and feeling like a failure. I am so scared I won't be able to have a second child and ahve this feeling for the rest of my life.

Testing tomorrow morning when I am 12DPO - have your fingers crossed for me.

I'm so sorry for what you are going though @AdriannaP I struggle to find anything to say or any advice to give you. In terms of the baby stuff, I think that if you had truly given up hope, you would have given them away. I think the fact that you have kept them means that while it's heartbreaking to look at them, they also represent the hope that you will need them again soon. I'm so sorry about your MCs, I can't even imagine the emotional and physical pain. But you made a healthy DC before and you can do it again. You are not a failure, look at what you've done so far, look at what you have endured and you are still strong enough to be a good, caring mother and wife.

I have my fingers crossed for you for tomorrow! Baby dust and virtual hugs 🧚🏼‍♀️

@Oilyoilyoilgob how did you get on at the vets? Hope your cat is okay! Ours kept waking us up in the night 😴 shattered today.
@AdriannaP you are a much stronger person than I can ever imagine being! I think it's really lovely you've kept all those baby things. They must hold lots of precious memories to you and hopefully a reminder that a healthy pregnancy and baby is absolutely possible and you will get there ❤️ It must be so hard with everyone you work with getting pregnant as well. I can't imagine everything you've been through but understand that part. I'm one of the only of my friendship group without any children, and my brothers and their partners all conceived easily, my parents conceived easily as did my husband's parents and I just feel like none of them can even remotely comprehend why we haven't had one yet.

I am 6dpo today and giving fair warning I'm going to be a nightmare for the next 8-9 days. I've already entered my 'nipple checking phase' 😂 where, I kid you not, I whip out my nipples periodically and look at them to see if they look or feel any different. I only do this at home of course, but it's no less crazy. And I usually don't do this odd thing until closer to the end of the tww!! 🤦 Goodluck to you all putting up with me (and for your BFPs of course!).

@Oilyoilyoilgob your ‘I wish I’d started earlier’ is me all over. All I keep thinking now is why did I wait so long after my miscarriage. I knew my head wasn’t in the right place but also I think because I had fallen pregnant without trying I just assumed I could fall again easily. How wrong I was and what an idiot for thinking it. I often think now maybe that time two years ago was my one chance and I’ll never see the positive test again.

Got AF today as well so feeling the disappointment as usual.

@eloiseislost your cats are gorgeous we sadly lost our cat this year and were so devastated. We have a dog as well who I actually rescued after my miscarriage and she is def my child

Sending you all positive vibes. My OH have just started some supplements so hoping it helps him get super sperm soon

@MrsKin90 I do the same, nipple checks every hour! Bring the craziness on, that's why we're here!
13DPO today and no sign of AF yet. My last luteal phase was 12 days so I'm still within my norm and the day is young.
I am starting a new job today, which involves a 1-hour commute, which is a big change from my previous 8-minute commute! But, hey, at least I'm a 'specialist' apparently!
I kind of want AF to come so I can start again, as I got so many BFNs this cycle, last one on an IC at 11DPO. I have a plan for my next cycle: vaginal temps, SMEP, yoga in the morning, less carbs. The last two will probably be replaced by Netflix and pizza though.

@MrsKin90 @eloiseislost
thank you both so much for your kind words. I know I am very lucky to have a beautiful child already and she truly brings us so much joy. but the longing for a second child is there. We have space in our hearts and house!
The nipple checking made me laugh.

I have pregnancy symptoms since yesterday - metallic taste in mouth and sore breasts. Tested this morning but came back negative. I have to say that I went to the bathroom twice during the night so maybe morning urine wasn't that strong. AF is also not due until Saturday. So let's see - the waiting game has began! Will try and stay strong and not test until Thursday or Friday.