@Quiffy I genuinely panicked because I'd been thinking it had been high previously but never thought on those occasions, shit it's gone!! Where is it! Before LOL, what a clown! So clearly that's what high feels like.
I dunno what it means.
I don't really understand CM either! Mines been consistently like a slightly watered down lotion, cloudy/white for a good week or so now. I only remember seeing thicker CM in my underwear the weekend When my fertile window started according to my app so I assume that was EWCM. I didn't actively check then as I didn't know CM was even a thing lol! At times I think it's drying up but then I check again and there it is again. I've felt like I've done a little wee at times and gone to the toilet and I've not HA.
Getting frustrated today because I've been taking tests and they've been negative so it's hard not to think well that's me done this cycle. But I'm due in 5 days if my cycle remains 30 days as it has been for last few months and my boobs are usually sore my now I'm sure of it and they're not even a little bit. I keep telling myself it's still possibly too soon and that's why tests are negative so I still find myself googling crazily. I am waiting for AF to be the ultimate hope killer but I just wish I could fast forward until the 18th when due and it either comes or I get a BFP. It's so hard this waiting malarkey!
If the spotting I had this week was implantation surely I should be getting a faint line now as it's been a good couple days since I had that but perhaps not, I hope so!
It's just pure desperation and frustration now so I'm sorry for the jumbled and pathetic rant!
Also my friend who's been quite negative with me about TTC and telling me to stop thinking about it and saying it might not happen and calling me crazy when I talk about it (duh I know and also aren't all women TTC crazy) all of a sudden wants a third, when she's always been adamant she didn't want anymore and I'm like urm don't you dare get pregnant before me!!!
I don't think I could face her if she did haha!