Anyone TTC after MC?

[Martina2311]

Hi ladies, anyone who would like to join me on my ttc journey starting this month? We have a 7 year old son already and last year year exactly around this time I got pregnant with n.2. This pregnancy ended in miscarriage which was dragging for me from January until March. I had lots going on since then and only now ready to start again. I am on CD9 at the moment so waiting for my fertile window. It feels strange starting around the same time as last year and I am slightly anxious but excited at the same time. It would be great to share thoughts and feelings with someone on here so please feel free to join me! ❤

Hey! So sorry for your loss happy to hear you've decided to TTC again! I'm in a similar position, came off my pill in July, fell pregnant in September but that lead to a MC at 6 weeks. I'm back TTC now but DP has a new job and has been working late shifts so I've only seen him for 30 minutes a day so not managing to DTD much so I don't think this month will be my month :(. How are you getting on so far?

Hiya @Martina2311 going through the same boat.

Little background - I'm 33 and already have a 14 year old who will be 15 very soon. And my partner (not my sons father) have recently decided to try again after we suffered a MC earlier this year in January.

I think till only recently I have even felt we could try again. I'm currently ovulating so making the use of this window. But I'm not going to lie - it feels quite scary even though it's the first cycle of doing this. I just don't want to feel anxious about it happening all over again.

So fingers crossed when comes to testing in about 14 days all goes well. In saying that I am thinking I may try the FRER test but scared of a BFN.

Hi ladies, thank you so much for popping by and sharing your stories. I've always found mumsnet really useful and supportive and I guess because of the last experience I feel like it may help to go through it with someone in a similar situation.
So sorry for the loss of your babies. Did you also only then realize how common this is? The more mums around me I opened up to, the more I realized that it really is more common than everyone thinks. It really is just a nature. But having said that, I am a bit worried it might happen again. It's not putting me off in trying and I only waited this long because I was changing a job recently and wanted to settle there first...i was annoyed I have to wait until the right time even though physically I could start right away but honestly now that the time came, I questioned myself (and my partner) a couple of times if we are really ready and set to possibly go through this again. Or just mentally be nervous. It's a weird mix of emotions.

@Jurassiclover oh no, thats not an ideal situation. When do you guys see each other, in the morning/evening? If morning, some baby making might set him for the day haha. If in the evening, hopefully he is not too tired after the day at work. Its not easy when time is limited. But if you know your fertile window, at least you can focus on that time more. Would this be your first child? I think its amazing, that you only just got off the pill in July and you got pregnant almost right away. Finger crossed its as easy this time too! :)

@tallulahhulah1 we are similar age! I am 30 and also had my son quite early (he is turning 7 on Saturday). I also find out about our miscarriage in January. We had a missed MC..development stopped already around Christmas time and I had no idea until a 12 week scan. It was draining as I had to keep coming back to the EPU for scans as they were allowing me time to pass everything 'naturally' before deciding to do surgical management in mid March.

Is there anything that you do different this time? I've been taking Pregnacare conception practically since the miscarriage, so has been my partner.

I guess the good thing is that because of all this, I've learned a lot about my body and cycle so don't really need ovulation tests/BBT measuring anymore to know when I am fertile etc.

I've got FRERs ready in my drawer. I used them before and quite liked them. I had a faint positive with it at 10 DPO.

@Martina2311 aww yes it seems we are.

I'm so sorry to hear this!

Yeah, I was pretty drained from it also. I naturally passed but it was an awful experience. I think I just wanted to be alone and my poor partner couldn't do anything but just console me.

I decided to be more prepared this time around. I started taking folic acids well in advance I was considering changing jobs but thought as I'm getting older maybe it's now or never for us. Luckily I am in a good position at work to take this step. Even though it feels at times I will most definitely starting again.
But I think especially with miscarriages they happen more than you think - I didn't want to brag my self up about it as sometimes it's nothing you could do about it.

I only came off the pill recently so not expecting too much as I have read it can take its time. But fingers crossed I get a little Xmas surprise :-)

How are you dealing with the outlook this time round? I'm finding watching videos of women going through the same thing quite uplifting
Also have you told anyone close to you your are TTc? I keep having these mental notes when invited to future events "I may be pregnant by then" lol

I think I may make my partner take then pregnacare- I have already told him to restrict caffeine intake lol

@Martina2311 it's in the evenings so it's even harder cause he gets home about 10pm which is usually when I'm starting to head to bed because I'm up at 6am! Hopefully once we get used to the new schedule we'll be able to adjust! And he's on different shifts in a couple of weeks so if I don't manage it this month hopefully next will be more likely! Yeah it amazed me how quickly I caught tbh, gives me hope that it'll be just as quick this time! Keeping my fingers crossed it'll be nice and quick for you too and that it'll be a sticky bean🤞❤️

Hi Ladies, I'm also TTC after a missed MC a few months ago. It ended in surgery and was a very traumatic experience all round. It's weird because at the time I was quite stoic and pragmatic, and accepted what was going on, it's only been in the last month or so that I'm really processing it and can still get upset by pregnancy announcements etc. I'm sure I'm not alone with that?!
I'm 37 and feel time is not on my side! I do have a lovely 3 yr old son who has been my little sunbeam throughout - I'm not sure how I would have got through it all without him. I'm trying to remain positive. I've heard that you are v fertile in the 6 months post miscarriage, has anyone else heard that?
Sending love and luck to you all xxx

Hi! I would like to join please!

We started trying in April this year and yo our shock found out we were pregnant in may. Unfortunately at 6 weeks we had a mc. Fast forward to August we find out we are pregnant again, after having a scan due to spotting we found out we were having twins. Unfortunately a week later we lost one twin and the following week lost the other twin. I had to have a d&c due to my body not miscarrying like last time. I am now on my second af since the procedure and hoping to start trying again after this af ends. Love reading other peoples stories, so sad for you all that you have gone through this too, but nice to speak to people going through the same xx

Hello ladies! Thank you for joining and sharing your journey. @Winkat I am really sorry you went through this again. I can somehow relate as I was also at the beginning quite rational but as time went, I was more and more drained as I couldn't even move on physically and I guess as it was more sinking in, I also felt more sad. I guess at the beginning you just have to accept what is happening to your body, you can't do anything to help it but allow it. But later on you still feel the pain deep inside. I had 4 friends giving birth around the same time. One in June, another one in July, another one in August who ended up giving birth 1 day before my due date...they had a girl, which I've been dreaming of and her middle name is a name I was hoping to use for my girl one day. It hurt a lot...although the timing was nobody's fault. Another friend gave birth in September. It wasn't easy, but I am happy it's finally my turn but honestly...I was having very bitter sweet feelings about all these pregnancies and I was partly ashamed of it but couldn't help it. :(

I also did hear about the fertility after miscarriage. I think there was a research that had surprisingly very high statistics where pregnancies shortly after miscarriage were more likely to continue in a healthy pregnancy than the ones conceiving later again. They didnt have any particular and proven reasons for this but the results are apparently quite strong! :)

@Jessem29
I am SO sorry...this must have been so draining time for you and really devastating. I can't even imagine going through this. You are amazing that you got through this and its not putting you off trying again. I think it's unbelievable that you conceived so quickly both of the times and I am sure that your dream baby will find you really soon and this time will stick with you until the end!

Sorry @Winkat didnt mean to say again. I meant sorry that you went through this as well. Writing on my phone.

@Martina2311 aww it's so hard watching people your close to have babies. A few of my friends have also had babies this year, and even though you are happy for them it is painful. Yes we have been so lucky to conceive so quickly, it's just terrifying now. We have lost the excitement of finding our we are pregnant because we no to well what can go wrong. Xxxx

@Jurassiclover oh right, that makes sense. It can be quite difficult with working schedules and tiredness. But it's great his shifts are changing so future is bright in case you are not lucky this month! You can also look at it as that you are able to prepare and invest in your body even more, by vitamins and healthy diet..we are also saving up so that I can stay on mat leave a bit longer, so for me it would mean more money saved etc :)

I am also curious how long we take this time as both, with my son and my second pregnancy I fell pregnant right away. Last year we conceived on a second cycle but only because we didnt hit the fertile window on the first. So I wonder how it will go this time. I am planning to DTD every other day from today lol. A bit tricky because I have a bit irregular cycles. Sometimes I ovulate on CD16 but sometimes even one week later on CD23 so we need to cover longer window just in case :D

@tallulahhulah1 hahaha you mentioning the events! I'm thinking the same. Only just got back from abroad and buying bottles of Bailays at duty free ahead for Christmas. Only to think half an hour later that maybe I should just drink it now before finding out I am pregnant and not being able to enjoy it 😅 We are also planning a triple date with our friends...going to a comedy club and drinks but cant find a date that suits everyone earlier than in January. Everyone is getting excited about leaving the kids behind and finally going for drinks together (we've never done this as just couples) and I'm secretly already annoyed that I may be the only one sober lol. We've never done this actually and it's really difficult for me and my partner to go out together so I would love that. But well, if I do get pregnant by then and everything is ok, I will be of course happy to sacrifice and be the good one with a glass of water in my hand. If I am not pregnant by then, at least I have something to look forward to! :)

We have told a few close people we will be trying again around this time. But I think that we wont tell many unless we go through a successful 12 week scan this time...Last time we also told our 7 year old son and as much as I do not regret at all him knowing about what happened, I dont want to confuse him in case this happens again. He is REALLY excited for a sibling. In fact its putting me under a little pressure and I'm partly doing this for him. He really wants to have a baby..he understands the last one wasnt strong enough and healthy but doesn't understand why we dont have a new one growing in the tummy yet...he keeps asking and for some reason he think that by the time the previous baby was due (August) we would already start "growing" a new baby again but that's not happening yet. So I really hope it wont take too long and wish that this time we will be more lucky and I will be telling him good news soon. ❤

Did your 14 yo know about what happend?

@Jessem29 I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I welcome to join this journey with you also and hoping we can all update and share the process.

@Winkat I heard about being most fertile after a MC in that time frame. In saying that I waited much longer as I didn't feel prepared to start again mentally. I'm not sure why but it hit me really harder than I anticipated.

@Martina2311 sorry late message - it's new one hectic week at work.
Plus been feeling slightly under weather. Not sure if the cold weather is hitting my harder.

It's so hard as I work in the media industry so everyone is literally "pub?" Nearly everyday so I keep using the guise of got to rush home for dinner. My partner is a chef so that is deff more believable than me doing it haha.

Awww at your little boy. Bless him, it's really crazy how much they understand at that ages. I am sprinkling the baby dust for you!

I didn't tell my son as we wanted to wait to see how it went but sadly of course it didn't end well.

But on the bright side I know my partners family and my family are all rooting for us to soon. Even though they haven't said it I can feel the hints lol.

So are you testing beginning December. I'm so nervous as every cramp of tinge I feel - I keep thinking this is it. My ovulation is predicated correctly is over and we did try a few times over the period so let's see. Even though I don't want to become obsessive over it

Hi everyone. Just wondering if anyone else has noticed there periods change since mc. My first mc nothing really changed for me. However, I have just had my second period since having the surgical management of my last mc and both af seem to be a lot longer and heavier. My usual af would last 4-5 days. They are now lasting 7-8 days. Has anyone else experienced a change like this. Thanks so much xx

Hi @Jessem29 I've also noticed a little difference since my mc. Mine are not heavier but for some reason when my flow finishes, I still have a very light spotting for maybe another 2 days. Its only noticeable when I wipe.I know its not really a big thing but didn't use to have it like this. Also my cycles always a bit irregular but usually between 28-33 days. Now they are mostly 34-35 with an odd month when I would ovulate earlier and the cycle would be shorter, like 28 days.It's quite strange that the mc or treatment affects it right? But at the end of the day the body went through a lot so maybe it takes time to settle. Although my surgical treatment was in mid March, so it's quite a while.

Hey @tallulahhulah1 :) No worries, I've been also busy for the last days. It was my sons birthday yesterday and we had a party at pizza express :D it was great but all the preps towards the day were time consuming. I was also making two cakes on Friday night, so hardly got any sleep lol today is a proper lazy rest day. :)

So when did your fertile window finished? Great that you managed some baby making during the right time! :) When would you expect your period? I know what you mean that you don't want to be too obsessive over it. But it'shard not to :D Especially when you know you were trying at the right time, you can't help to imagine that it worked.

My fertile window should be starting on Monday/Tuesday so testing actually second week of December. I will be abroad for 4 days during that time so it will be a nice distraction. :)

Did any of you, have any pregnancy symptoms during the 2WW on the cycle that you actually fell pregnant?

@Martina2311 god it is strange isnt it. My cycle was usually to the day at 25 days but now I am anything from 25-30 days. You are right though like our bodies have been through alot it can take time to settle! Xx

Hello ladies! How is everyone doing? Any positive updates? :)

I'm currently a bit confused with my fertile window for this cycle but hopefully should be more clear soon.

I was expecting my fertile window to be from last Wednesday with ovulation latest on Monday. I definitely had some EWCM during the first days and had other fertile symptoms. I'm tracking my temps only roughly as unfortunately I wake up at different times throughout the week but it seams like I did have my usual temp dip on Monday (I get a very low temp day or two before ovulation). But I also get sensitive nipples right after ovulation followed by sore breasts from about 3DPO. However, not having any nipple sensitivity yet and today I tried to feel my cervix and it feels slightly open again with a tiny bit of EWCM. So I wonder if my ovulation hasn't happened yet but I guess will figure that out in the next few days. We've been trying every or every other day for the last week but now my partner is not too well and I'm going abroad for 4 days on Saturday, so really hoping we wont miss out on our chance this month :(

How is everyone else getting on?

It's been a weird one for me - I'm not sure if I'm having phantom symptoms. Every little cramp I am thinking is this it?

I took an early test and got a BFN and I'm not due till Friday but got some spotting today. So not sure if I got my times wrong.

I'm not going to get my hopes up unless my period is late as this waiting is driving me crazy! Lol.

Oh no I hope you don't miss your window. I can't do much this weekend as it's my sons 15th birthday and we have a laser tag day.

I never thought how stressful this could all be on top of working with the go go of Xmas season coming up.

Hello, can I join? I had a mmc and surgical management at the start of May. I've been ttc ever since with no luck :( it took 8 months to get a bfp before that too.

Hi @Chanel05 of course, welcome! Sorry to hear about your first pregnancy ending in mc. I had a missed one too, it was really heartbreaking and frustrating to find out I miscarried while my body didn't give me a clue. I feel for you. Although you have been trying for a few months already, I really hope that once you succeed, it will be all good for you this time.

What have you been trying while etc?

@Martina2311 sorry to hear of your mmc too .

Oh dear. I've literally tried EVERYTHING. You name it. Pineapple core, acupuncture, smep, pre-seed, Brazil nuts, legs in the air, evening primrose oil, soy isoflavones, meditation. God many others that I can't even think of! Anyway, I've concluded that none actually work, it's just a game of luck. Are there any others you've tried?