Obsessed with TTC :(

[Jade218]

So....I decided only a month ago to start trying. I've been on the fence years about kids and finally get to 33 and I've become obsessed.

It's driving me nuts, I've only done one cycle - today alone I've done a test even though I just had a period and haven't even ovulated??!

I'm reading every article going and watching live births on YouTube.

Wth has happened to me?! Also concerned if it takes me a year how much of my life it's going to consume.

I need to forget about it, any tips?

Anyone else feel the same and totally obsessed by it? I am really hoping it happens soon as I can't take much more or this!

I can't advise but I'm the same. We've done we have wanted to try again for around 6-8 months but only just came off the pill 25th August. I think it's natural?

I totally sympathise! I think the first month is extra crazy though and it does get easier :) we are on our 4th cycle (well 3rd really as we started after ovulation the 1st month) and i find myself thinking about it much less than the first month :) i think i watched every youtube video imaginable during cycle 1 haha

I'm so glad it's not just me then!! I have also started to panic as call me crazy but I didn't realise you can only get pregnant in 12-24 hour period which makes me feel likes it's harder than I thought and I should have started sooner.

This was me! Everyone will tell you to relax and not think about it and that it'll happen when you least expect it. That's easier said than done! Do try and not let it start to affect you and your relationships with others. I couldn't talk to my friend for ages and actively avoided him after he told me how much his wife hated being pregnant. To be fair to him he had no idea we were TTC.
I wasn't ovulating and had 'cycles' lasting over 100 days. It drove me mad! My GP was so sick of seeing me that she finally referred me to the fertility clinic. One dose of clomid was all I needed and it annoyed me at the time that she could have prescribed it if she wanted to and saved us so much time and money.

If you have regular cycles, work out approximately when you ovulate and then stop tracking it obsessively. If you become too obsessed with dates dtd will become a chore which is no fun for either of you. It might even hinder his performance if there's too much pressure!

When AF arrives try not to be too upset. Be kind to yourself. Go out and do something nice and take your mind off it. Have some wine and pâté!

Good luck with it. I hope you don't need to wait too long for your BFP

@aliceneedswine thank you. We have a weekend in London this week and it's ovulation time lol so I shall relax and have a glass of wine for sure :)

And yes it's annoying when people say relax and it'll happen?! I feel like saying if I could do that then I would lol

Seems to be me at the moment, only decided 3 weeks ago to start trying. I'm just 40 and partner is 39 so we possibly don't have it easy.
Came off mini pill on 15th August, been tracking periods for years on app, according to appears due to ovulate that weekend, had withdrawal bleed that weekend and have been tracking temps and using opk tests since.
My brain is all over the place trying to work out why is going on and have been reading everything I can

I was the same. I was SO obsessed even before we were ttc (I came off HBC in April and we started ttc in Oktober) but I took the time to learn as much as I could about my cycle, my body etc. I tracked my cycles with Kindara, amazing app and community. And I also read 'the bible' called Taking Charge of your Fertility by Toni Weschler, I looked into natural supplements to help get my cycle on track etc and I just felt that I was prepared for everything. That I had done everything I could and now it was up to luck. I guess you can't just switch the obsession off, definitely didn't work for me, but you can try and use it to your advantage.

Yes I am feeling all the above, its so frustrating. I am 37, (38 in Jan) and terrified I wont get pregnant. We've been trying since March, I take Folic every day, but when I've been to the Doctor they keep telling me to wait and come back in 6 months. Does anyone have any tips or advice on anything else I should be doing or taking? Should I be pushing the Dr to do some tests now? Its a vicious circle as the stress I am sure doesn't help, but every month I get a no, I get all stressed again! arghhhh

@Sophie311982 is there a way to pay for private tests as I see what you mean there's no point waiting a further six months to know if there's an issue it's just time wasting.

To be honest I think I'll be looking at private options after month 6, even being 33 I know the advice is wait a year but I haven't got time to waste if there's a problem I want to know sooner rather than later x

@Jade218 I think there must be. I am surprised at how little I know about it all (TTC) and actually how bl**dy hard it all is. Yes I don't want to wait I'd rather know now so I know what my options are. I spend so much of my googling advice and I think my best way forward is to DTD every other other day inbetween cycles. I just feel so down about it all as I finally meet the man I want to be with and now this is proving so hard and I sometimes take it out on him which I know is wholly unfair. :-(

@Sophie311982 definitely Agnus castus (Vitex Berry!)

@Sophie311982 with you there.
I spent 12 years with my knob of an ex who didn't want kids. 4 years ago (this week) finally met my perfect guy and then when we get round to 'the talk' we realise age might be against us

@Peanutty86Would this one be the right one??
www.amazon.co.uk/Vogal-Agnus-Castus-Oral-Drops/dp/B00LTJOY26/ref=sr_1_2?ascsubtag&s=gateway&crid=29O4CSWDCJM78&keywords=a+vogel+agnus+castus&sprefix=a+voge+agnu%2Caps%2C127&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1558107681&sr=8-2[artid|1931.a.27329532[src|[ch|

@claireb707 how old are you if you don't min d me asking??

Also ladies we have to remember it's not always is the problem lies with - men can have low sperm count or infertility issues too so worth not discarding the guys

@sophie311982 if you are over 35 and have been trying since march that's 6 months so the doctors should start the ball rolling this month. Fingers crossed for you!

@Jade218 I was 40 in July, partner is 39

@Anny27 Thats what I thought. I will call them today and push for some tests. I assume they would do blood tests? My boyfriend is also more than happy to come and be tested too.

@Jade218 I'm on cycle 8 TTC no 2 (was 3 years off pill for no 1 but we weren't trying I had no idea when I was ovulating and we prob only DTD once a week) I want to say it gets easier but it didn't for me I still google everything and hope each month is my month.

One thing I've learned is it is best to do OPK's and try the SMEP method which is start on CD 8 and do every second day and then when you get a positive OPK DTD for 3 days straight then take a night off and DTD once more for luck.

Everyone saying relax does not help one bit.

I'm only 30 but since coming off the implant in Jan I am having bad Ovuation pain and bad AF pains before for a week before AF is due. I never had any of this before my DD. I had blood tests done in May to make sure I was ovulating and the doctor confirmed I was by my Progesterone levels she said they were 45 and a level of 30 means your ovulating. It was just my GP did those for me. She has now referred me to get a scan over the pains to check for cysts or ENDO. I have health insurance so this is private. I am booked in for a pelvic scan and a transvaginal scan.

If you have the funds to go private don't wait and stress yourself out at least if everything comes back normal then you know its just when its going to happen not if!

Hope this helps :)

@Sophie311982 yes, I had tablets (they were huge!) but will try drops next I think. I'm planning on starting to take it soon so I've had it for a few months before ttc.
Best to only take it up until ovulation when ttc though.

@Jade218 I hope you get your bfp soon! It's hard not to get obsessed but I've driven myself insane since I started my ttc journey in June 2018 and I've actually had stress councelling as a result. It can take a long time and your mental health can suffer.

@fallingasleeprightnow I can see how it can do that, I never understood it when I didn't want kids which was most of my life lol but it now makes sense. Have you had fertility tests yet?

I hope it happens soon for you X

@Sophieb15 I have started using ovulation sticks and this month will try SMEP.

I paying for tests after month 6 is nothing has happened - my husband insists on waiting until month 12 so that he can get in as much stress free sex as possible 🙄😂!

it's all I can think about.

Came off pill 1st August , wish I had done it sooner. Didn't realise there was so much to it.

@Thistle23 I feel exactly the same. I think there should be more awareness that it is usual to take a year and also that there is only 20 percent chance of conception each month.

Until you start looking into society makes you believe it's one time and pregnant for most people which is just not he case for most it seems.

I would have started 6 or 7 months sooner had I have known

I'm just so annoyed , my brother had a one night stand with his ex and she's pregnant .

It's just nuts people don't want a baby and end up with one not even trying .

It's the waiting for my first period coming off the pill that's driving me insane .