TTC FIRST BABY - THREAD NO.8

[cupcakesandglitter]

Hi all - apologies if I've missed anyone out on here, I'm half asleep 😂

@FlapJackered @BabySquid @BambiOnIce80 @CookieWaffle @Crossfitgirl @Delilah7 @MrsAW2018 @MrsC87 @MrsR16 @EltzBee @FivexFive @ValidUser @RanchoRelaxo @rj995

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Thanks @purplefig ❤️ I did that last night, we went for a long drive and I was open and honest about everything I feel right now and he assured me that he'd understand and be there, which is why he said he'd take a half day today to spend time with me and help me feel better. He still hasn't even left work :( I don't doubt he doesn't understand, but my issue is that he ALWAYS prioritises work over me, and doesnt understand that that's not okay. I have a hectic work life too and I have to travel a lot for it so I completely get that when you're busy, you're busy. But I also make sure I have a work/life balance and know when to switch off, but he doesn't. I just don't feel like I'm a priority for him

@BabySquid oh god that's a conversation we have all the time 😂 it's back to the whole emotional labour thing, they don't realise how much we do but act like anything we ask them to do is either 1. A big deal, or 2. Nagging. It's so annoying!! He was actually talking last night about how he had very little to do today at work, so he didn't need to do a full day.... but today he's now swamped apparently? God I wish he was as mature as me I swear

@cupcakesandglitter oh man, that is really rubbish in that case. Have a read through of that facilitated men thread, because if this is what he's like now - imagine what it's going to be like raising kids with him?

Awww @cupcakesandglitter, thank you for remembering me 💖 Sorry your DP's being a bit useless 😔 I'd definitely be raging if I'd been stood up 🤨 Not useful when you'd rather punch them than have sex with them, is it?!

If you guys can put up with what's looking like is going to be a loooong TTC journey for me, then I'd quite like to hop back on and join you again... This thread moves so fast though! Will have to catch-up with who's who! 😄

I'm so pleased things are going smoothly for you @RanchoRelaxo (long may it continue 🤞🏻🍀). And @Delilah7! How did I miss you being pregnant?! Not surprised though - I told you it wouldn't be long before you were again 😉

Good luck with the move @Crossfitgirl 🏡 I hope it's not too stressful.x

@BambiOnIce80 thanks honey xxxx

@Hadaley I'm so sorry. X

@BambiOnIce80 it's great to see you! I have a HSG next week, had one high and one borderline FSH, awaiting my AMH and dh has a sa next week. Might not be so quick for us either!

OPK help requested!

I'm on cycle day 9. I mentioned earlier today I was getting a weird feeling in the left side of my lower abdomen. I have a 34 - 36 day cycle, so I wasn't planning start OPKs yet, but I've just done one as the pain is still there. There is a 2nd line, but it is faint. Does this mean I'm gearing up to ovulate soon? I know I need to wait until the line is the same strength as the other line, but I wasn't expecting any line at this stage?! Assumed I ovulated day 20+. Anyone have any thoughts?

Oooh, sounds like you're making some progress through the TTC system @ValidUser! 🤩 Borderline results are a total head 🤬, aren't they?! DP had borderline/low SA count and motility on his first results, but moved into the reference range on his repeat (abstinence and SA tests aren't a good mix, apparently 🙄). He's certainty not got super sperm, but allegedly enough to make a baby naturally. On the brightside, my bloods reckon I'm not perimenopausal (small yay! 🎉).

I had an HSG about 5 years ago. Make sure you take some paracetamol beforehand, but otherwise you might enjoy it if you're anything like me (science geek 🤓). Seeing your actual own uterus/fallopian tubes/ovaries real-time on a screen is fricking awesome! 😎

@cupcakesandglitter my DH is guaranteed to forget appointment dates, but he forgets things in general. If you're saying your DH is a wonderful man, then he's not forgetting on purpose. Vigorously remind him of anything important literally up until the moment it happens, until he's made plans to include that as part of his day. Believe me, it'll work out better for both you. I know you shouldn't have to, but is it better for you not to do anything and him forget and you get upset and be in tears, or you reminding him and both of you having a lovely day? Besides, I think it's in many men's blood to forget things.

@Hadaley I'm sorry 🙁. At least you know you are able to conceive.

@EssJayyCee that's great! Whatever it is that's causing you pains, I hope they find it and fix it.

@purplefig there's always some amount of LH in your body and it may show up on a IC as a faint line. It's not always blank when not getting ready to ovulate. Mine almost always has a line. Unless it's at least 30% dark, I don't even bother testing every day. If it's very faint and it's this early in your cycle, I wouldn't test more than once a day until it gets much darker.

@KatBeCool thanks for answering - it's at least 30% dark. It's lighter than the control, but there is no squinting involved. If it was a pregnancy test I would be doing a very confident happy dance - I'll keep monitoring and see how it goes.

@cupcakesandglitter like @KatBeCool said, if he is a forgetful person then maybe you need to both come up with a way to handle it? It shouldn't be on you to sort this, but maybe he can set up appointment reminders / phone alarms / to do lists? I assume he is capable of doing this, as you say he takes work very seriously as this kind of forgetfulness wouldn't likely be tolerated there.

A @Crossfitgirl worthy essay about to happen!...

@SullyWifey wahhooo!!! Well done lovely! You can be seriously proud of yourself for that as I know it's not easy to put yourself out there with initiating. Yes cupcakes and I will take honorary Auntie status! 😂
I wouldn't worry about the sperm afterwards, sometimes there is hardly any with my DH, often if we had sex less than 3 days before.

I am so with you @EltzBee on your emotional labour list. I was thinking the same thing the other day, I even give DH his vits each day or he wouldn't take them. And if I even dare to have a go about his drinking he acts like having one less g&t of a night is the biggest sacrifice! 🙄

@Hadaley no, I'm so sorry lovely. I hope you're ok and you have some support there?

@EssJayyCee welcome back! Glad you have got the ball rolling on the tests. It is good to know where you stand with it all!

@cupcakesandglitter sorry you DH is being a douche. As I told you last time my DH did the same. It's so bloody frustrating isn't it and makes you feel like you have no support. I would make sure he knows how much it upsets you. I think repetition is the key here! Hope you're ok.

@purplefig it doesn't necessarily mean you're gearing up to ovulate, I had quite a dark one on cd15, it's now cd18 and I still haven't had a positive and they went lighter again. It is possible though so maybe keep testing just in case?

Gurrrghhhh feeling a bit crap today, finding ttc a bit stressful and feeling a bit low about it all. Also work is going crap which is adding to the stress. Next month definitely going to take a break from the charting etc. I need to focus on something else for a while. I feel like 80% of my energy and thoughts are going into ttc - I don't think it's that healthy, especially if we are in it for the long haul which I expect we are.
Sorry, depressive rant over!

@FlapJackered thanks for the reply, I'll keep testing and see what's what. Was just excited to see SOMETHING going on haha.

Sorry to hear you're feeling rough. I totally get you and it can be so all encompassing. I think it's a really smart move giving yourself a bit of a break next month, relax and enjoy Christmas and you can still come back to the charts in the new year. I'm very aware of not letting this TTC business take over our lives. Funnily enough I can manage that wonderfully during the first half of my cycle, but the lead up to AF is dreadful. Hope you have a nice weekend planned (and never apologise for ranting on here)

Thank you lord for your advice, this thread is already being positive for me as I came home today and my ovulation test had arrived early. I’m actually looking forward to start testing as weird as that sounds, fingers crossed they work.

@cupcakesandglitter I hope things work out with your DH sounds like something’s on his mind maybe. I know my OH tends to shit down and avoid things when he’s down about anything, men struggle to open up don’t they.

@hadaley so sorry you had to go through that but like one of the ladies has said, least you can Conceive so try your best to look at the little positive in this, you will get there. I’m in the same situation x

@DayDreamer1707 you mean you didn't immediately pee on one out of curiosity and sheer impatience? You're strong! 😂

Just know I think of you all each day and cross my fingers that this cycle is your girls times ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@katBeCool hahaha no, I was tempted but I want to wait till AF has stopped because it won’t show anything now. I do try and be strong 💪🏼

Thanks @purplefig - I think it's just that he's so forgetful and just doesn't think, because he completely understands everything I say and he says that I'm not being unreasonable, I just think he just doesn't think before his actions 😩 (re the OPKs, I've done two/three every day this cycle and I've had a very faint line on every single one... just haven't had my positive yet x)

Definitely @KatBeCool he's not like that at all, He tells me all the time that I just have to keep reminding him because he'll forget if something crops up last minute, I suppose sometimes I just wish he'd remember the important stuff. Thankyou though, glad (we'll not glad but I suppose it helps) it's not just DH xx

Thanks @FlapJackered xx

@DayDreamer1707 They definitely do struggle - but shit down made me laugh 😂😂 xx

Just to top off a shit day more - I had SEVERAL needles tried to try and get blood out for my tests which took the piss. I also didn't get the job I applied for either 😩 they did call to recommend me for another job so it's not all bad... I just want a nice day out, shopping and relaxing and just being looked after I think 😂 xx

@cupcakesandglitter, sorry you've had a shitty time lately xx Hope your dh shakes himself up and gets his head in the game soon.

@crossfitgirl, yaaayy moving day!! Hope it's not too stressful and, as already suggested, don't forget to chrisan the hell out of your new house :)

Anyone got any exciting weekend plans? Xx

@Hadaley I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you're ok hugs

I love you all! Weekend off. Enjoying pizza and wine. Will be doing keto again after HSG.

@ValidUser Enjoy! Glad you're relaxing and having fun

@cupcakesandglitter sorry you’ve had a shit day and your dh isn’t being properly supportive. Have you had another conversation with him this evening about it?

@FlapJackered hopefully all the Xmas stuff coming up will help take your mind off it. Make loads of nice seasonal plans that you couldn’t do if you were already pregnant maybe? Ice skating, cocktail making, tobogganing at the snow dome.

@Hadaley I’m sorry, that’s so disappointing. How are you feeling?

I’m around 7dpo now. Usually my boobs would be starting to hurt by now but nothing yet.

Hey ladies just catching up on a few days worth of posts!

Checking in again
Age 24
CD 20 cycle 2
Ttc#1

Hope we're all well. I've been keeping track of the threads but not posting recently.
No symptoms for me this cycle, feeling normal so doubting it's my month but hey, 1 week till AF so we shall see.
Xxx

Urgent advice needed girls! Just got my static smiley - HURRAH!
Situation is I can either try and persuade a tired DH to have sex with me, but will have to inform him of static smiley which never helps him with getting to the finish line OR I jump on him tomorrow morning instead (when he will be more keen) and hope I don't ovulate overnight.
Tomorrow morning should be ok right?