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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC A GIRL!!

66 replies

sweetbean · 09/01/2007 08:17

hello just a quick question has anyone got any advise on conving a girl as have been looking on the net and it seems that you always have to but the b*^&%£d book! so i was just hoping that some one had some advice or knows of a good web site.

Thanks for any replys xxxxxxx

OP posts:
JoAndTheBoys · 09/01/2007 17:31

Already have 2 ds's and imagined we would try for a girl next time round (always wanted 3 children).

But actually now it's come round to ttc, I'd just be over the moon to be actually pregnant! And I've only just started trying too...it's not as if I initially tried for a girl and then after a few unsuccessful months changed my opinion!

My ds's were sooo gorgeous when they were babies (and still are!) that I feel a bit sad at the thought that I might not have another son and have a daughter instead...

Of course it's only natural to have a bit of a preference for one sex or another (and a heck of a lot easier to talk about it on here than admit it in RL!)

Good luck, I hope you get a gorgeous healthy baby, whatever the sex may be.

comebacksummer · 09/01/2007 17:41

Oh for goodness' sake.. I honestly don't believe people when they say they can't understand why people who have multiples of one gender could possibly want the other- lighten up. I'm pregnant with no3 and have 2 gorgeous girls already.. and I would be totally lying if I didn't think deep down it would be nice to try a blue flavoured one. That doesn't mean that if it's a girl I will do anything differently or love it any less- just like I didn't when dd2 was born.
To answer your initial question Sweetbean if you read all the guff the only things you can try for a girl seem to be to have sex loads, well before ovulation, then abstain for the couple of days before- the theory being that boy sperm will die out by ovulation day and leave the slower moving but more tenacious girl ones waiting for the egg. This doesn't work of course if you have any trouble conceiving, or have no idea when you ovulate!! This theory is why some people joke that people with multiple girls must have been shagging like rabbits.. the theory says that to conceive a boy you have sex just on ovulation day or the day after. Of course, like the chinese predictor calendars and all other old wives' tales I doubt there is any scientific proof to all this..not much help I know! Good luckxx

Peridot30 · 09/01/2007 17:50

Overrun i dont understand why you think im being rude. This is a forum where you can express your own opinion and thats all i was doing.Not everyone can have children and all i said was be thankful for what you get.

kizzie · 09/01/2007 18:23

Im always fascinated by these 'I want a boy/girl' threads.

I have twin boys born via ICSI. They came after years of heartache and i really did belive that I would never have them. They are gorgeous, healthy, gorgeous (did I mention that bit) boys and DH and i totally adore them.

BUT - I have always wanted a daughter. Its just a 'feeling' in me and I dont expect it will ever go away. DH and I arent able to try for another child for medical reasons so its not a situation thats going to change.

Of course it doesnt begin to compare with the despair of facing infertility but I definately feel that there is a hole there.

So I have been in that situation of praying desperately for a child - ANY child. And I am so so so grateful that I got to do all those things I thought I was going to miss. But that doesnt change that totally irrational 'wish'. Sometimes you just can't help how you feel.

Good luck TTC!

Kizziex

Ready · 09/01/2007 18:47

In the interests of harmony ... I don't think Peridot was being rude for saying 'take what you are given and be thankful'.

I entered into the spirit by suggesting the old wives tales... but I happen to agree with Peridot. Any baby is a gift. I am ttc at the moment and I am not in the slightest bit concerned of the gender.

That is not to say I don't sometimes wonder what gender my baby (if I am lucky enough to have one) will be. Of course it is natural to dream of what will be.

I don't think preferences can be healthy though. Life doesn't always work according to what we would prefer.

I am not saying that people with 3 of one gender might not 'like' the other gender next time round... but I can't imagine how anyone could be 'upset' at having more of the same.

But then I can't really see this objectively as I am desperate for any "flavour"

I am trying to sound as nice as pie here, I am not trying to have an argument with anyone...

JARM · 09/01/2007 19:16

as the mother of 2 girls, number 3 is more than likely going to be a girl too - but there is a part of me who really wants a boy. I have always seen myself with boys but I love my girls to the end of the earth and back, and if I have another girl i will be just as happy.

I dont feel like my family is complete yet, and im not sure it will after number 3 (secretly wanting to be the modern day waltons!)

Every baby is a gift... and is treated as such.

Overrun · 09/01/2007 21:32

Peridot30 I thought you did come across a bit rudely actually. I know its a free forum, but sometimes threads have a feel to them, and this one was a lighthearted chat about different ways (that might or might not work) on choosing a girl.
I thought you were a bit heavy handed, and having been on the receiving end of similar heavy handedness in rl, I reacted to it.

Califrau · 09/01/2007 21:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Spidermama · 09/01/2007 21:37

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BonyM · 09/01/2007 21:40

I have 2 dds. Both times I conceived, we'd had sex a 2-3 days before ovulation which would support the stronger, slower, female sperm theory.

Overrun · 09/01/2007 21:42

I had heard about the sex before ovulation, but reckon I concieved my boy twins 3 days before ovulation, so not foolproof by any means

TheWillowTree · 09/01/2007 22:17

My friend was desperate for a girl so bought the book and lent it to me. She did all that about reducing the sperm count so there would be fewer male sperm (tight shorts, heat etc) and also stopped TTC initially 7 days before ovulation, then 6days, then finally 5days, and no more for two weeks. She got pg third time and had a girl as hoped.

If you really want to try, start stopping a LONG time before you ovulate and gradually reduce the number of days until it works (hopefully).

I wanted a boy first time and was so convinced I had, but then looking at my chart realised I had TTC a week before ovulation and got pg then, not when i hoped, at ovulation. Mind you, I got a boy next time as we conceived spot on ovulation day so i am very happy.

Good luck and have fun - it can work if you are very dedicated.

NotAnOtter · 09/01/2007 23:37

i think its a case of not really being able to comment till you have been there

i was upset about keep having boys

i still love them all desperately

i do feel blessed

would dearly love another girl

grrrr

Original poster
sweetbean · 10/01/2007 08:02

Thanks for all your replys !!!!!

I have only got half way through reading then all by feel compeled to thank POPPIESMUM for actualy understanding supporting me!!

The only thing that matters at the end of the day is a healthy happy baby!!and no i would not care if i had a boy he would be my SON and i would love him !!!!!!!

It is a poppiesmum said just a bit of FUN and i don't see any harm at all in trying to swing the odds on way or another.

I just feel is very rude to come on the theard and imply that i don't realise the miricale that conciving a child is and that some how through asking the question i am ungreatful and selfish !!!

Thank you all for post its been realy intersting reading them all and an going to continue to read the other half of them now xxx

OP posts:
Original poster
sweetbean · 10/01/2007 08:17

just to say thaks fo all your support i have read through all your post and want to say thanks to overrum and comebacksummer as well!!

This realy was just light hearted thread and as has been mentioned everyone as alowed to dream !!!! and is good fun trying for the flavour you want !!!!!! xxxxx

OP posts:
Ready · 10/01/2007 14:23

I don't think I was rude at all. Sorry that you think that. I entered into the spirit with some suggestions of gender selecting.

Saying that I didn't think it was a good idea to have preferences is not rude - it is just my opinion.

SmileysPeople · 10/01/2007 14:47

I get really cross when people are seriously intent on one sex over another.

Lighthearted chat about slight preferences maybe be Ok, but anything more serious, smacks to me of some kind of consumer culture where we should have all get what we want in our lives ,and we if don't get it we have reason to be upset.

Children are people, with their own personalities, irrespective of their gender.
I always think people who SERIUOSLY engage in these discusisons should really reflect on what they're saying and maybe then the 'I just want...' would be put in perspective.

People who say 'I love my boys/girls but....' astound me.

Personally 'I love my boys.'No qualification. Ever. They're my world , my life, I couldn't wish for anymore.

Overrun · 10/01/2007 16:26

"light hearted chat may be okay" well thanks for the permission.
Are you aware of how sanctimonious you sound? I'm glad you love your boys with no qualification, but so do I. The fact that you think that some one like me, who might occasionally think wistfully about having a daughter, doesn't love her boys unreservedly strikes me as bizarre and a bit niave.
Human emotions, and wants and desires are much more complicated and multi faceted than you are suggesting.

mellowma · 10/01/2007 16:35

Message withdrawn

SmileysPeople · 10/01/2007 16:50

'lighthearted chat' not permission, just my opinion.
'wistful' notions of wanting a daughter/son also fine (IMO).

What I find objectionable is when people feel deeply unsatisfied, or hell bent on acheiving one sex when already have children. I am afraid that I have too much exoereience of difficulties conceiving, people who are childless and people who have lost babies and people who have very disabled children to have much truck with such self indulgence.

Sanctimonious?Possibly. But no less real.

frangipan · 10/01/2007 16:54

I would love a girl!!

I have 2 boys also!!!

mellowma · 10/01/2007 16:59

Message withdrawn

Overrun · 10/01/2007 17:01

but do you think anyone on this thread has come across as desperate to have a child of a particular gender at any cost>?
I don't think so, and thats why I thought it was a bit strange to come on so strongly about it, as you did.

happybiggirl · 10/01/2007 17:03

Message withdrawn

SmileysPeople · 10/01/2007 17:15

I just feel, a little more of being content with your lot, particualrly when you are blessed with any healthy child, would go a long way.

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