Home on the amazing and determined TTC after mc-ers. We know all about the ups and downs, trails and tribulations,, how it feels to live in the cruel world of Facebook baby bombs. Solidarity, sisters!

[Justonemoretime]

The Rules...

(1) A lady may only POAS on a Friday.
(2) Friday means the day that everyone calls Friday in the time zone where you spent the night.
(3) Rule (1) does not apply to POA-OPK-S, UNLESS they are being illegitimately used as surrogate HCG detectors, in which case Rule (1) most definitely does apply
(4) Rule (1) does not apply following a BFP because if you want to waste £25 a day POADigiS that's your prerogative
(5) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady is POAS in an attempt to get a BFN to prove she can start DTD with intent
(6) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady wants for unknown reason to pee on an actual stick, like a twig or some such, if that lady is unexpectedly caught short whilst tramping in the forest looking for bears.
(7) These rules (including Rule (1)) are subject to the change at any time if the ladies of the Posifrickentivity thread decide on a whim come up with empirical evidence to prove that it is luckier to POAS on any other day of the week
(8) Violators of Rule (1) shall be subject to fish throwing.

And as a grand finale, why not pledge to NEVER POAS before 14DPO?

grittedteeth that's a long list. Haven't managed to leave the house yet either though DH is determined to get me out tomorrow even if it's just to do the food shop. Can't see it happening though.

Blimey,twice a day for 5 days?! We'll done you. I guess the good thing with ttc is it actively gives you something to plan and focus on. Even if we do become abut obsessive - I know I certainly did!

To add to the JTFO list.... Shitty hormones. Since my mc, my skin has been awful. I'm a real skin care addict vain and so my face has always been clear and healthy but now it's spotty on my nose and just looks dreadful.

broody I am with you there. Every time I touch my nose it's a flakey snow storm!

broody lou my skin went nuts after both miscarriages too. But the other way – so so so dry. Usually my skin is quite oily, have never had dry skin in my life. First time the dryness lasted about 6 weeks, this time it seems to have sorted itself much quicker. But actually, before I miscarried (well I had already miscarried but I didn’t know it yet) my skin suddenly went really dry. That was one of the things that made me think, hmmmm…..

smiling that is a long long long list. You do have to wonder where they all come from!!

Dp kept pointing them out, when the party of 'its a girl' came in I thought he was going to cry

my skin is rubbish at the moment too

Oh yes, my skin went bonkers after my mcs too.

So I haven't has the best of days. DP and I have fallen out, although what has more accurately happened is he got moany about money and I internalised it, made it all my fault, and have now retreated into my girl cave and I'm not really speaking to him. Which he HATES as he is a very lovey dovey person and which suits me fine as I think I'm pretty depressed and I don't talk much when I'm down.

Then to make me feel really crap I decided to test today (at 8dpo!!!!!) and got a BFN. I know I'm not pregnant this month as I have no positive signs but I still have to tirture myself by bloody testing too early.

I also have Slimming World tonight and my scales say I haven't lost weight either. What a surprise lol.

I made a decision yesterday to try so hard to be at peace with myself in the moment and just find one or two things I can be happy about as it's oh so easy to be dragged into what is going wrong or hadn't happened. Don't get me wrong ladies, I am generally not myself and sad but I have found by just allowing myself a few things to be happy or smile about in a day, it makes it easier to get through the day.
I also don't lose sight of the goal which is no matter what I will be a mummy : )

sebs as for the weigh in, pop to loo moments before you get on scales and wear something lighter than a sarong

Morning all
Hope we are ok today. So random Tmi question.
DP and I DTD this morning... Sharing lots here - and anyway DP could not climax - and it's happened a couple of times (maybe it's his age - who knows. He's 44)

Anyway the heartless bitch in me thinks "oh my god, how can I get pregnant if he doesn't climax??"

I'm worried the pressure is putting him off. It's probably not and I am reading waaayyy too much in to it. And this morning my ov stick was still on low fertility.

But I know if I was on peak fertility and it happened I'd be really stressed and convinced I'd missed my window.

I do not want DP to feel like a baby making machine but I also really worry...

I'm a bad person. Please slap me with a fish!!!!

I'm breaking out quite a lot.. is this normal after mc?

brummie confession time.
The hub HATES sex on demand for baby making purposes. I googled this and found done people get a syringe and, well you know the rest. We only do it when he is working shifts and passing ships. Oh and I get stressed at the thought of him not doing his thing when I am on 2 bars or peak. Total meltdown one month.

Brummie it is frustrating if you are trying and for some reason it doesn't happen! Don't panic maybe you need to seduce him, wear sexy lingerie and dress up! Spice it up a little..

It does happen where when the fertile window comes we all turn into obsessive women trying to have a baby and the fun out of dtd disappears and becomes a chore. Spice it up and relax and enjoy it

brummie take hopes advice not mine!!!! Mine was just information!!! Giggling out loud at myself. Sex is soooo much more enjoyable when there's no ov pressure!

OMG I read that 'take a syringe ' comment far too literally in my mind and thought you meant actually stick a needle in his balls lol. Moments later my sun addled brain actually realised you meant Turkey baster type thing

Ok now im going to share, tmi alert and im so so sorry dp!

I am currently in crazy ttc woman mode and as I mentioned we are doing it morning and evening, yesterday morning dp was really struggling to ejaculate, he was getting really upset and I was panicking, thinking what if he cant do it, in the end I decided to change to a position he likes but I dont particularly, it worked!

the moral of this tmi story is that Its too easy to get wrapped up in the ttc bubble and forget that dtd is supposed to be fun; poor dp must feel like I just want his sperm and not him.

He is entirely in agreement with dtd as much as possible but ive decided to take the pressure off of him im going to take things back to before we were ttc and when we first met, so that means sexy underwear, sex in every room of the house and texting him the rudest things I can think of to get him in the mood.

yesi might be thinking about ttc the whole time but he doesnt need to know that

Oh my god, I love this thread. Literally, where else can you talk about shiz like this?

sebs I think its totally normal for things to get a little tense some times when ttc. I know me and my do have had arguments about it in the past – he does not like to feel like a baby making machine. I know some couples are quite open about it, for me and him I need to keep it subtle.

And yes I will admit to faking orgasms and positions that I don’t particularly like but he certainly does! Also, I’ve learnt that if he doesn’t want to have s@x one evening, then its much more productive to just accept that, and grab him the next day, rather than get in a massive strop and fall out with him and then not have s@x for days. This I have learnt from bitter experience.

Remember, those swimmers last ages so as long as you are dtd every couple of days from a few days before your fertile period to a few days after, you will be fine.

Thank you so much ladies - you've made me feel so much better. And I'm sniggering at syringes.

I know I've turned into a mad obsessive TTC woman which is soooo unfair and I don't want to be, I need to chill the fuck out. Another acronym CTFO...

Sex should be wonderful and fun - not an means to end

And breathe. It's his birthday this weekend so will be giving him lots of attention.

But thank you so much for sharing your TMI's - it just makes this crazy journey a little bit less lonely.

On another note, I saw my works occupational health this morning and she said she didn't need to see me anymore as she felt I'd recovered from the mc. Which is true, I feel physically I have. But she also said right as soon as you are pregnant again, come and tell me and we can let your manager know (confidentially) that you are pregnant so we can keep an eye on you and look after you.

I said I felt a bit weird work knowing I was trying for a baby and she said "why? You shouldn't. Every single person is entitled to a happy and fulfilling personal life and that includes a family. Happy people are happy employees"

I felt very touched by that and I realise I'm very very lucky to have such an understanding employer.

After my first mc we were DTD every day, sometimes twice a day as I was desperate to catch the eggy. Unfortunately I didn't even ovulate before AF came but it did teach me not to try and have sex so often. First of all if your bike is older (say late thirties, early forties) his little fellas aren't as healthy as they were in his twenties. So it's actually better to allow his sperm 24 hours between ejaculating to replenish stores again. This theory goes out the window if you're in your twenties and early thirties I think so feel free to shag as often as you like!!

PMSL @ bike - BLOKE!!!

I just laughed out loud at my desk. I thought you meant to say bike, which is even funnier.

Sorry just realised it was brummie who wrote the original post, not sebs.

Any of us that were having a crap day must be having a little smile reading all of this!!

Bikes and syringes. The mind boggles....

I feel upset I'm 7dpo and I Poas! I don't know why and it negative... Gosh why did I do this

Hugs from me hope x

I have to say I havent been tempted to poas, not even last month, I think im to scared too.

Don't do it until you miss your AF!! I refuse to test again.