Roll up, roll up, come enjoy the BESH funfair!

[MyNameIsWinkly]

Come to the BESH funfair - we have a coconut shy, apple bobbing, dodgems and much much more. The prizes? Shiny new BFPs, of course. You can only go on the rides if you're a barren 30plus-er, the entrance fee is one completed BESHtionairre.

[evilgiraffe]

Gloomy here too, but I'm going in to town to get my hair cut, hurrah! I'm also going to look for caster cups for the sofa in preparation for our new floor next week. Anyone got any ideas where to find sticky-backed felt to put on the bottoms of table legs?

[FrankelInFoal]

Draf, most pound shops, or somewhere like Homebase will sell those felt pads. I'm getting my hair cut today too - final day off work before I have to go back and prepare for an important meeting on Friday.

When the newly diffed are feeling less shocked, don't forget to mark your spot in the PESH fred. No hurry, take your time - it took me about 5 weeks before I felt brave enough to post there.

[evilgiraffe]

Wicked, thanks! It's one of those things you never ever need to buy so I have no idea where to start looking.

I think it will be some time before I'm brave enough for the PESH - currently it still feels very surreal and made-up...

[FrankelInFoal]

That feeling doesn't really go away Draf! I'm still feeling a bit in-de-nile even after yesterday's scan!

[MyNameIsWinkly]

I got a surprise bfp this morning!

[FrankelInFoal]

Cluster diff!!!!!!!

[KatAndKit]

Woo hoo!! Congratulations winks ! This is really a bumper week for the ESH.

[eurochick]

Bloody hell! It's a cluster-diff!

[evilgiraffe]

Holy crap, winks! That's brilliant

[Fabuluce]

Wow congrats to the extremely recently diffed - what fabulous news - Kat, I haven't even had the chance to know you pre-diffed!! :)

[FizzyFeet]

Woohoo! Congrats wink that's awesome! What a run of luck for the BESH!




Yay!

[FizzyFeet]

Arrived back to find nice big package of ivf paperwork. Drugs arrive tomorrow - hurrah!

euro how are you doing? Been thinking about you today.

[evilgiraffe]

Exciting stuff, fizz! Have you made space in your freezer? I really should ring the clinic and ask what to do with my leftovers and sharps bin...

[evilgiraffe]

Freezer? I mean fridge, obviously

Oh, and I got my early scan date today - 1st November, eeeek.

[Nokkie73]

A fine filly called frankel told me that it's like differ central round here. Huge congrats to twonks (lovely surprise diff action there. Did you relax at all ? Did someone tip baby dust all over your head ?) drizz draff and kat. Rub yourself up against the rest of the BESH like a randy poodle with a big hard on please. More diffs are surely on the way........I can feel it in my water.

[eurochick]

Ooo nok how are you doing?

fizz thanks for thinking of me. I'm doing ok. KFZK doesn't seem to want to discuss next steps. Which is somewhat unhelpful as we are trying to book a holiday that doesn't clash with the next IVF round. Which we can't do until we agree when to do it. ARGH.

Enjoy your drucks.

[MyNameIsWinkly]

norks hi! No I'm pleased to say I was extremely fucking stressed, post mc with excessive fanjo bleeding. Hurrah :)

euro it is shit when the men refuse to talk. HWCA is much the same. Could you get a stack of holiday brochures and approach it from that angle? Like, skiing is good in January (so we could do the ivf cycle in February when we get back)?

fizz have the drugs arrived? Are you excited, or freaked and hiding them behind the old half finished jars of mustard and pesto?

[FizzyFeet]

How do you know so much about the contents of my fridge? twink it's like you've got a camera in there

I'm stupidly excited about it all. Feels like it has been a long time coming. It's a weird kind of double-think, though - on one hand I'm convinced it will all work, but my head is still the voice of doom and reminding me that the chances of failure are much greater than the chances of success. It feels very odd to be excited - after 3 years of ttc I had very much got into the habit of assuming each month was a failure. Even when diffed I didn't believe it and was in denial for a week or so. I feel a bit like a newbie again! fully prepared to take all this back in a couple of days when the down regging has kicked in

euro tough going with KFZK. I guess he is grieving too - did he know the due date?

We need some new meat round here, seeing how many PESH we have! Any lurkers out there want to come into the Big Top?

[evilgiraffe]

Well, she is a copper, maybe winks has bugged your fridge, fizz?!?!

I felt really confused at the beginning of IVF - not sure whether to be cheerful and optimistic or realistically pessimistic. So I spent the whole time swinging from rock-solid conviction of OMGTWINZ to "not a chance". It's pretty normal, I think. I'm still gobsmacked it seems to have worked - turns out bypassing my endo-ridded tubes was all that we needed to do.

Glad you're doing alright, euro, even if future planning is having a few hiccups. I find that sometimes I need to give HOTB a heads-up on difficult conversations - "can we talk about this at the weekend" sort of thing, so he has a chance to sort his thoughts out first without me there.

Good to see you, noks!

And yes, any lurkers are plenty welcome. As the latest mega-cluster-diff has proven, bitter gin-swilling barrenness can lead to good things, through a whole variety of means :)

[BESHerday]

waves I should really start with nipple-tastic twirling congratulations, I believe.

sneaks in
Today was neither fun nor fair. It was my first appointment with the hospital after referral from the GP. The unprepared consultant I saw galloped from a second high FSH reading in three months to: 'IVF is your best chance of success and you should do it immediately as your ovarian reserve is rather obviously failing. Here, let me draw you a graph.'

Man-splaining baby-faced idiot aside, I can promise that insta-diffment is unlikely. The Dude is on another continent for another eight weeks of research, and I have to face that something other than schedules, stress levels, and statistics may be keeping us from becoming parents after more than 18 months.

Perhaps BESH to the core: Not only 35, but also selfish enough to have moved from a good professional career to flirting with academics. Perhaps for you to judge:

1. Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')
   Yes, though I almost went blind one evening drinking lethal quantities of G&T at Peter Luger. The first, and only, time I have sent a drink back for being too strong.
   
   
2. Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?
   Unbeknownst, I went for the cradle.
   
   
3. Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
   a) weewee
   b) poopoo
   c) foofoo
   d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.
   C, with great lack of success. Open to suggestions.
   
   
4. Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you:
   a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway.
   b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.
   Not one for baby dust or sprinkles, but I similarly draw the line at punching. Personally I avoid POAS. It's too sad. Never ever had a second line - other than on those ovulation thingies.
   
   
5. Is R2D2:
   a) an adorable robot from Star Wars.
   b) the source of all evil.
   All of the above.
   
   
6. what colour are your walls?
   Some tired off-white, some pistachio ice cream as per landlord.
   
   
7. Number of pets?
   None, sadly, due to likely future moves.
   
   
8. Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame?
   Tonight, I shall settle for any handsome doctor who tells me it will all work out while I sip whisky, slouched elegantly in a leather chair.
   
   
9. Lesbian crush?
   Other than the BESH?
   
   
10. What are your views on camping?
    In principle, or in practice?
    
    
11. How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
    
    i) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
    ii) Over 100 quid
    iii) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks
    
    I can safely say that i) is not going to happen. iv) Cracked after year one. After reading Mumsnet boards I made several bulk purchases of cheap ovulation sticks from Amazon, but am inconsistent in usage. Mainly because I had this vision that it would just sort of work. For all other testing I: Poundland or own-brand.
    
    Finally, tell us how you found the BESH and why you'd like to join us pliz.
    I've been lurking and it's sad and lonely to do this alone.
    
    

• Signed, not always this bitter. But really: today was rotten. Hello fears, nice to see you were right on target!

goes off to curse BUT with nipple tassles and much joy about recent news on the thread
sneaks off

[FrankelInFoal]

Oooh, fresh meat! Sounds good to me BESHerday, pliz to be explaining your journey so far

[FizzyFeet]

Hello BESHerday, you sound like you'll do alright in here! I'm with you on the gin - there's a fine line between strong enough, and eighteenth-century stomach-rot levels. I have modelled my gin mixing technique on my PIL (as my own parents are not gin swillers

You do need to tell us your celebrity crushes though so we can mock you later