Those waiting to ttc... (slightly pointless thread)

[LoveYouForeverMyBaby]

We're ttc #2 in dec and I know it's a really silly thing to get excited about, but just started taking folic acid and feeling very excited about it!

Sorry for the pointless thread.

Leafmould thanks for compiling the list. It's great that we are all now in TTC order.

Welcome loulou

Thanks for the list leafmould it's fab :)

Sorry for those with AF & BFN :(

I'm on 2ww now (CD22) so trying not to go crazy and will NOT be testing until I'm VERRRRY late (the capitals are for my own benefit and not yours hehe!)

I have 1.5 weeks to go on my current packet then will get back in the saddle :)

Bit scared, my endo is already painful. Will request a gp referral to the clinic as well.

Anyone else ttc in December?

Good luck MrsW It'd be lovely to have a BFP on this thread.

Tiger I think that there's a fair few of use TTCing in Dec.

Bridget&hb Sorry, i haven't responded to one of your questions in the previous posts. I'm not sure whether we will be in our new house by December. I think that we are really hoping for that but it all depends on the mortgage coming through in time. We have the decision in principle for the mortgage, have a solicitor on the ready and the building survey and valuation was carried out earlier this week. I will only TTC if I've moved.

Also, does anyone know much about flying in the first trimester? Is it a big no no?

Feeling sad and fed-up. AF has finally properly arrived after starting and stopping since the beginning of the week. What would have been my due date is fast approaching and feel totally hacked off I've been waiting to start bleeding rather than waiting for a gorgeous baby to arrive.

Lots of huge bumps on the school run at the moment. I haven't found the small ones too upsetting over the last 7/8 months, but for some reason the big ones are really hard to see. Can't help feeling that in some parallel universe I should be one of them.

Also chickened out of taking my driving test next week.

Hi Bridget really sorry to hear you're feeling down today. There's not much to say that can help but you're in my thoughts, wherever you are. xx

Huge hugs to you bridget try to see this af as one step closer to that bfp you (and we) are all going to get v.v.soon. Use it as an excuse to eat choc and relax. Then come Dec we can all start charting, using opk having exciting 2ww and symptom spot all together. Huge hugs and chin up.

Hi flowers and LoveYouForever, thank you for the kind words and hugs, I really appreciate them. Feeling a bit brighter now - I had a self-indulgent sob and then gave myself a kick up the arse! Lots to feel very grateful for.

Don't think I'll get a BFP very quickly - but that's ok - I just want one before too long IYSWIM. I am looking forward to lots of ttc sex (TMI alert but I love lying there afterwards hoping that we've hit the jackpot) but I hate the 2ww with a passion. Unfortunately, my PMS symptoms are annoyingly similar to early pregnancy signs, so, perversely, the less pregnant I feel, the more hopeful I get.

I really wish there was some chocolate in the house - I got a sugar fix from some hot jammy toast but it hasn't really hit the mark.

London I've got my fingers firmly crossed for you re: the mortgage. We want you on the December thread!

Arrrggghhh, just realised I missed "The Young Apprentice" - thought it started at 9pm!

Bridget. Sorry you are having a tough time just now. I hope that the longer road leads to the greater rewards. . . Was reflecting on this today, as a young woman I am mentoring was going soft over photos of kids. I really think that the experience of ttc and having children is very different when you are in your 20's, or an accidental pg, than later on once the tick tock is louder and you have spent time deciding, planning etc. I can't believe how chilled I was about it. . . Didn't realise that you had to think about schools before they were 4, that there may not be adequate child care nearby for return to work, that breast feeding is a challenge, so many things.

Love is love, but having much anticipated children is maybe a different sort of fulfilment than surprises.

Winter pansy, I too am seeing dozens of baby pics on fb. There were 3 pg announcements in a row the other day! I do feel left out, as I had my kids way before my friends, and the only one of my contemporaries who I was pregnant with is not longer caring for her kids . I have school mum friends, but I think there is a special bond with friends who you knew before, and made the transition with together.

Hope all is well with everyone, fx mrs waj 2ww!

Young apprentice was good bridget watch it on catch up!

bridget big hugs are coming your way. I hope that you are feeling better today? Thanks for the good luck wishes reg my mortgage. I would love to be on the December TTC. But have no fear, I'll still posting with you all

Leafmould I know exactly what you mean! I'm finding it extremely unfair (unjustifiable though) that people seem to be having little 'accidents' whilst I've been planning just to TTC and thinking of how to cover childcare etc. I guess it just goes to show that we should just go for it and things will just to have to work out.

I watched the young apprentice. Some of these kids are so scary. I wish I had half their confidence at their age!

Thanks Leafmould and London, I feeling much happier today. I had a lovely walk with BridgetDog this morning which really raised my spirits. It's hard to stay cross with the world when you are stomping through beautiful National Trust parkland, with Autumn colours all around, and with a happy waggy companion by your side. Even slipping on some wet leaves and bashing my shins didn't dent my mood!

Leaf I have been mulling over your last post on and off all day. I fell pregnant with Mini Bridget very quickly and look back with amazement at how naive I was. I just blindly assumed everything would go swimmingly (which thankfully it did) but I was so unaware of how blessed I was. I sort of envy the innocence that my old self had, but at the same time I appreciate everything that time has taught me. I bet, without meaning to be, I was horribly insensitive to those around me with private fertility problems.

I do worry that I have spent so many years dreaming about DC2, and imaging ourselves as a family of four, that I may have expectations that no real child could possibly fulfil. On the other hand, when DD arrived my whole world felt like it was turned upside down and it probably took me about a year to adapt to my new identity. I think this time around I have more realistic expectations of life with a newborn, toddler, and so on, and DD has already done the hard work of breaking me in!

It is a bit horrid when you are out of sync with your peers when it comes to the timing of having children. I don't think people mean to leave others out, but people do seem to gravitate towards others who have children at a similar age, or a similar family size. I felt horribly excluded when all my antenatal friends started having their second children. I felt like I didn't have the right to moan about anything when they were juggling two and I just had DD to manage. I was probably being paranoid but I did feel that a couple of the mums felt that they were somehow superior because they had more children.

My mum always said don't worry they won't keep having more and more babies - this will pass - and she was right (funny advice though from someone who had seven!)

Sorry for the epic post!

Hello everyone!

I had a horrible 1hour dental appointment today, after which I went back to bed! Better than last time, when I went to work and got nowt done because the local anaesthetic made me so dippy.

Your walk in the woods sounds lovely Bridget. The trees really are amazing. I did find time to admire a beech tree today. Am hoping to get a good walk with family on Sunday if it is not raining.

I know exactly what you mean about the naivety of the easy-come pregnancy. I recall myself saying "I don't know, we'll figure it out" a LOT!

And I think we are lucky to have had that experience, and perhaps be able to appreciate it on reflection, even if we didn't realise it at the time. It must have been infuriating for others, though, like London says!

It is a shame when motherhood has an element of, almost competition to it. it is tough when you are struggling with external stuff: work issues, housing, finances, uncooperative partners which is thwarting our biological instinct to have more kids, and it is hard not to compare ourselves with others, But that is where the judgementalism starts.

I am finding this thread really useful for reflecting on ttc and parenthood, and although I am really looking forward to starting to ttc again, it is also good to look back on what it was like before, so thank you for that.

Loulou, I will put you on the list soon. Welcome!

Bridget. . . Have you booked another test yet? You do not want to be doing it while you are pg, that is for sure!

I just found this thread, and it's perfect - I'm waiting to ttc too, can I join you?? First attempt, we'll probably start trying in April (I started a new job this past July).

I'm a bit worried about it tbh... Babies always seemed like something I would get around to eventually (I've never really been broody), now suddenly I'm 35, I have a stressful career-crucial job AND we're trying to buy a house for the first time (yes, I do procrastinate, sometimes for years :) I'm trying to be a bit zenlike about it, start taking vit D and B complex and cut down on drinking to get in the habit... we shall see. Whatever will be will be, right?

Welcome justcait!

Sitting on a train, interesting quiet time to reflect on your posts above about ttc. Justcait, I too am trying to be zen like but completely failing. Slightly panicking about not having had my rubella immunity checked because could be in my first fertile window (although no way of knowing for sure, just came off pill and am.determined not to start monitoring for ovulation for some months yet), in my job see lots of kids and although I've had all my jabs still making me worry. Even though I know rubella is rare now!.

Where is the zen? Hoping a day out in London with my dearest school friend before she emigrates will help me find it! Ooh and preggers SIL with 1yr baby niece coming to visit soon :-)

Hello justcait

flowersfortea - hope you have a lovely day out in London with your friend. Try not to worry too much about your rubella immunity. You should be fine if you had all your jabs at the right time.

leaf - hope you're not feeling too sore today

flowersfortea I'm supposed to have my rubella immunity checked?? I had been blithely assuming that two shots years ago sorted that out. What else is on the 'waiting to ttc' to do list (other than waiting, got that one sorted)?

[feeling faintly ignorant about the whole process]

LYFMB & Bridget thanks for the welcome :)

My turn for a down day today...seems like everyone I know (mum friends, neighbours, work mates, NCT group) are on their second. Feel down and jealous. Sorry for dragging the mood down.

So sorry to hear you are feeling down LoveYouForever , hang on in there, your time will come. And when your gorgeous little squidgy newborn arrives, he or she will be totally worth having waited for.

When everyone around me seemed to be having their second child - and I wasn't - I found it comforting to think of it that they had already got their "Christmas" present but, in a funny sort of way, I was lucky because I still had all of that excitement and joy still to come. I hope that makes sense!

Justcait - if you go to the conception section of mumsnet you will find a long list of pre-conception checks to have (bump to teens > conception > trying to conceive). However, I think it is really a matter of personal choice and personal circumstances as to how you comprehensive you want, or need, to be.

For example, I have made sure that my smear test is up-to-date, but I haven't had a toxoplasmosis test done as my GP surgery is reluctant to do them (they argue it just makes women more anxious if the test shows that they don't have immunity)

You're so right Bridget, going to start thinking about it that way. Like saving your nice piece of cake when everyone else has finished theirs already. Aw I like it thank you.