Freak out room for those newly updiffed after mc - Part VI

[CollieandPup]

Just found out you are pregnant after a previous miscarriage and too nervous to move over the to pregnancy boards? Freaking out about spotting, cramping, symptoms (or lack there of) and nervously awaiting your first scan? Here is a lovely place for lot's of support, hand holding and problem sharing.

Courtesy of owlbooty here are the Ten Commandments of the Freak Out Room.

1. Thou shalt check thy knickers to the point of insanity until the baby actually arrives.
2. Thou shalt also check the loo roll post-wipeage (sorry, gross, I know)
3. Thou shalt bore thy physician and midwife to tears with the mentalling.
4. And thy husband/boyfriend/family/neighbour's cat.
5. Thou shalt obsess over the absence of symptoms.
6. And the presence of symptoms.
7. And the fluctuation of symptoms.
8. Thou shalt pee on a vast number of sticks and keep ClearBlue and First Response in business.
9. The day before any scan extreme mentalling is permitted without recourse to the Haddock.

10. Self-diagnosis with Dr Google is Forbidden.

The Haddock will be applied liberally to all transgressors.

See here for the old thread.

Oh Dachs big (((((((hugs))))))), like everyone is saying, hope that the babies stay in there as long as possible. Thinking of you.

DH's company is going to cover me for 3 days while they try to change the insurance company's mind. My consultant is considering where to send me if we can't. But I love my doc and I don't want to lose hi
:(

Although if this an emergency situation I don't know what is!

That was supposed to say 'isn't' an emergency situation...

Oh no sounds a bit of a mess, all I can say is that I am thinking of you

banana that is dreadful, I would demand a refund

Oh Dach, how can an insurance company not consider this an emergency? This things make me furious. Glad to hear you've got 3 days to battle it out. Try and let DH sort it, and you just focus on keeping your pups safe. Thinking of you xxx

Big hugs dachs so sorry the op wasn't successful. Maybe they could try again in 48 hours?

The insurance company are being ridiculous! Of course it's an emergency. I really hope mrdachs can change their minds.

I'm sending you and the pups lots of love and luck. Love their names BTW xx

Well done to all the scan dudes

oh Dachs you poor thing. And what an extra worry. What does your consultant say? Does he regard this as an emergency? If so, he could formally write to the insurance company and say so. I know doctors often fudge it a bit. I mean - how can some call centre bloke decide whether this is an emergency and your policy covers you. Surely only a consultant can determine that.

Sending you a big hug xxx

Forgot to say; on your behalf banana definitely demand a refund x

dachs so sorry - how can they possibly say it's not an emergency? Thinking of you x

banana I'd definitely complain- sounds a bit pointless paying extra for nothing.

Today's scan went really well- saw little arm buds waving and everything. Even heard the heartbeat! I guess the bleeding can't be anything serious which is reassuring. Give it a couple of days and I'm sure the mentalling will be back!

dacha so sorry you've got this extra stress. I second what the others have said, if you can beg a letter of your consultant that says moving you will be detrimental, surely they have to listen to that? Xx

Consultant has already spoken to them and yelled at them and they are still being difficult...

Have been in London all day at meetings so just catching up on everyone's news. Dachs you poor thing - like you need that crap on top of everything else. But they are still sticking and I fully intend to be entirely correct in my prediction of their total stickiness. Please try to rest and take good care of yourself.

yay to all the scanners - what a great day for you all. BlackKat is right - I had to wait 10 days for my NT results (on the NHS). banana your scan sounds rubbish - I would also complain.

I hope everyone has a good night's sleep and catch up in the morning.

Dachs we'll see you tomorrow and look after little Alexander and Felicia.

x

dachs I'm sorry the op didn't go as planned and that you're having this extra stress - you really don't need this . Sometimes I'm amazed at how callous these businesses can be - would Mr Claims Assessor still think it wasn't an emergency if it was his babies at risk?! Ridiculous.

Having said that - and I can fully understand you not wanting to move and you really shouldn't have to - don't despair if you do end up under NHS care. I know we all moan about it - usually with good reason - but the NHS is often at its best in a real crisis and if (heaven forbid) the babies do arrive early there are the most amazing special care baby units in the big NHS hospitals. However, obviously I hope it doesn't come to that and that you get to stay where you feel comfortable.

Thinking of you, dh and the babies and sending big (((hugs))) xxx

Congrats to all scanees who've been back to report good news - are we still waiting for anyone?

Oh and banana I would complain too. I paid for my NT tests and they took the blood tests an hour before the scan, then those results were back by the time I went in for the scan. The consultant spent ages showing us head, heartbeat, stomach, arms, legs, right down to collarbones and jawbones and number of fingers! Then he ran the measurements through the computer with the blood results while we were there and gave us the results straight away. I did grumble slightly to dh about paying £200 for it but thinking about it, it was definitely worth it.

The good news is of course that 1.7mm is spot on normal so the results are likely to be fine, but it would have been nice to know that! Can't believe the "service" you got!

Big hug dachs

I have valiantly resisted a clear blue digital! Stared at it in tesco for about ten
Mins but walked away . I dont need the stress!

Dachs I can't believe the insurance company, hope you manage to get things sorted and stay where you are.

Hairy good on you. Better than me then. I had one in the cupboard that I was saving for fmu this morning (just to see if the weeks had increased) and somehow used it at 1am instead..... So now considering buying another for Fridaythe weekend.

Banana what rubbish service from the hospital, I too would be fuming.

Collie glad you're scan went well, and also that your kitty is ok.

Minnie that's lovely, hope it keeps the mentalling at bay.

I bit the bullet today and called my GP and both consultants, so have started the wheels in motion and just waiting for appt to see consultant. Secretary seems to think they won't scan til about 8 weeks. Eeeeeeek. Not sure whether or not to book in with midwife. Keep thinking I will just look stupid when if things go wrong.

Dachs so sorry to hear that the op didn't work as planned and insurance company are being little shits. My heart just goes out to you, and your DH
You do have two little fighters on your hands though. And I love the names.

Thinking of you and sending lots of prayers

Great news from all the scanners.

dachs that sucks :( How about getting DH to call BUPA tomorrow and telling them that his next phone call is going to be to the national newspapers..... My MIL claims to know a journalist at one of them - I can find out if a) he actually exists (no promises) and b) he wants a story if you like?? Is there any way for DH to escalate the case higher than the standard claims assessor at BUPA? Can they send DH their criteria for what counts as an emergency? They must have something prescriptive set out....

hairy good work on restraining yourself, it was the right decision!!

lily good work on getting wheels in motion. I would go ahead and book in with the MW in the meantime, fingers crossed nothing will go wrong this time, but you really shouldn't worry about looking silly, I promise no-one in the world will think that of you.

What a nightmare dachs but agree with everyone about the power of the NHS in a crisis. Am thinking of you and DHdachs and cheering on Alexander and Felicia.

Am feeling a bit low today. Just drove my car down half a flight of steps and feel like a total idiot. Noone injured but DH is spending the whole evening trying to get it out

And just heard from a friend that she is pg. She's one of two women who used to work for me and the three of us are still friends. One had a baby a couple of weeks ago and now the other is pg...I just can't believe it will happen for me too.

Sorry, glum post. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day. Here's hoping for great news for dachs and her pups

hadrian what on earth happened??? Glad you're not injured but you're going to have to explain what happened!! Big hugs for you - I know exactly how you're feeling about your friend being pregnant. I had exactly the same thought when I found out that SIL is pregnant - the first thing that went through my head was "marvellous, it's not going to work out for me now then". I know it's not rational and doesn't actually make any sense, but then again let's face it, none of this mentalling does really......

dachs sleep tight tonight, sending you and the pups sticky vibes

Dachs great news to hear the pups are still hanging in there. Every day they stay in is a good sign. Great on the fluid too.. Can the Docs give you drugs to stop your cervix opening? Another lady on another thread is on bed rest with bulging membrane and opening cervixamd the Docs are just trying to get her to 28 weeks and filling her with drugs. Hope there is something they can do for you too x shitty bupa, set dh onto them and avoid any stress xxx everything crossed that they stay put for a good while longer my lovexx

I've only peed on four sticks this pregnancy. I've gone all minimalist

Dachs truly shocked at the insurance company, do hope common sense prevails. They must surely be in breach of their contract with you and DH if they are unwilling to take Consultant advice on what constitutes as emergency. Wishing a restful night to you and to the twins. (((hugs)))

Minnie so pleased all went well with your scan

Hadrian glad you're ok, hope DH manages to retrieve the car?

Lily best to book in soon, I didn't and consequently am not seeing the midwife for the first time until 12+1 madness and stressful. I know it's scary, but better than missing or having a late appt, believe me!

Hairy your restraint made me chuckle