(((((hugs))))) to you womanly I am sorry you are feeling down about it. It can get really overwhelming can't it?
I so hear you about never expecting it to be problematic. I just expected to fall pg immediately ... and now we are 3yrs on with no baby. I would like to say though, don't take any notice of your DH's boss; that kind of comment is really unhelpful and clearly rubbish. It makes me 
because it implies that we are scuppering ourselves by wanting it too much; I am sure people who wheel out that kind of shit are not trying to be mean but those comments are insensitive and frustrating.
So I had a thought about how to make things less confusing during the 2WW: I think you live in London, is that right? If you do, you can go in to a Medicentre and get a progesterone test on what you think is CD21. It costs a bit (I think it's around £90) but it would put your mind to rest as to whether the FSH and ovitrelle have done their job. Personally I am a little 
that you haven't been offered this on the NHS given that clomid didn't work for you. Or you can go and get an ovary scan done privately which will show if you have a corpus luteum - it costs c. £120 and is more invasive but you get the results straight away. You need to do that within a few days of suspected ovulation though.
I went private for all the tests leading to the PCO diagnosis and for my clomid prescriptions but we have funding through the NHS for IVF. We would really struggle to pay for more than one round privately and, if you pay for IVF treatment yourself, you then don't get any NHS funding in the future so we thought we'd best just grit our teeth and go the NHS route. To be honest, we are probably seeing a consultant 2 weeks later than we would have done if we had gone private so it's not too bad at all (DH gave up smoking the day we were referred to the consultant and we'd decided we wouldn't start any kind of IVF treatment until his swimmers had 3 months of non-smoking to get up to full strength).
The one thing I would say about going private is that you know exactly what is going on - while some of the testing might be superfluous, I prefer that to not knowing if I've ov'd or not as that makes the 2WW unbearable.
How many ronds of IUI will the NHS cover for you? Could you have an initial consultation about doing IUI privately? From memory, I think it costs c.£900 per cycle. IVF costs (hopefully you won't need to know these!) vary between c.£2,800 a cycle (going private in the NHS clinic at Guys & St Thomas') all the way up to £20,000 (Harley St clinic). Some private clinics do a deal where you sign up to 3 rounds and pay £6,000 - obviously they make money if it works first time but if you need 3 rounds, it's a good discount.
The bigger questions is: will it work? I would happily pay thousands of pounds if there was a guarantee at the end of it all but that's just not how it works is it?
One thing the NHS IVF consultant chap said at our information evening was that if you start assisted conception before you are 39, the stats show it is more a question of when you get pg rather than if. Having said that, there is still no guarantee of a healthy baby at the end of it all.
The IVF chap said that the idea that being positive helps your chances is also rubbish. He said it puts horrendous pressure on women to cover up their feelings and pretend they are confident about it all working when they are actually petrified. Apparently a study published in the BMJ recently showed that the woman's state of mind during assisted conception has no impact on her chances of conceiving through assisted methods ... oddly that was a real weight of my mind as I know that I don't have to beat myself up if I feel less than 100% confident.
His view was that persistence is what gets you there, not positivity.
Anyway, what a big old ramble, sorry! I guess the tricky thing is that none of us have any answers.
But I do have plenty of hugs and 
for you whenever you need them 
Let me know if you want any more info on the private costs. Thinking of you lovely xxxxx