The resurrection of the 6th form common room for those inbetweeners who are TTC/PG after mc and are too long in the tooth to fit anywhere else

[notsobarrenmorebrokenbrook]

The resurrection of the 6th form common room, a place to put your feet up, wallow in self pity (me) or rejoice (and tremble in fright) at new growing beans and baybees after mc. No lists. No stats. No babydust. No feeling bad if you can't keep up.

Go.

Oh Mouse What shitty news. Well, you will already be at hospital by now but I hope you get your op today and can start the recovery process. Will be thinking of you today.

Hapy Saturday, Gorgeous Ladies! waves to all with extra big love for bee, mouse and battery I am so sorry that you have had such awful times... life really is so cruel. Thinking of you today, mouse and hoping all goes well...

Well, I had my early 'reassurance' scan on Thursday, but it turned out it wasn't very reassuring at all, but all hope is not lost. Basically, the NHS seem to only work on dates based on periods and assume that all women ovulate on Day 14. On that basis, at the time of my scan I would have been 6+4. However, as I had been charting and monitoring I know that I have a slightly longer cycle and didn't ovulate until day 19/20, so am 5/6 days behind what they thought based solely on my LMP. So, I had the early scan and ovaries look great and gestational sac found, but as yet no foetal pole or heartbeat visible. Sac measured 5+5, which would be about right. The consultant was not worried at all and said it was simply too early so he'll scan me again. He was happy to do it next week, but I've moved appointment to 2 weeks as I think we should hopefully see more then. It would be disheartening to go again next week and still not see anything, so I'm going to sit it out. I am trying not to get too attached to the idea of being pregnant, just incase it all goes wrong again. We are obviously thrilled but it's such an anxious time...

I am also following my GP's advice and am literally doing nothing except working and resting for the next 6 weeks. I have totally cleared my diary. It's weird as I'm quite social, but it's worth it to give my little bean the best possible chance of survival. But I guess what will be will be........ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxd

Oh mouse that's rubbish but as the others have said at least you are going to get someone good to do it. I hope that today goes smoothly and that you are being looked after.

Thinking of you today mouse hope everyone at the hospital is treating you well xxx

mouse was just checking in and hoping that all going better today.

Have been having a lovely day at home with DS & DH today, although my patience is really really short at the moment, poor DS gets to have a mummy who gets snippy with only a very small amount of messing about.
He is also coming down with a cold so not in the greatest of moods himself, but hopefully that means a decent long nap this afternoon - he's tucked up on the couch at the moment having asked to nap downstairs. I don't mind him doing this, gives me a chance to curl up with a book and put some quiet music on.

I just found out that a friend of a friend is pg, and am pretty amazed - I really hope she'll put me in touch with her, she had 5 mcs before carrying her son to term and it sounds like she's had a couple more since before reaching 14wks with this one. I find that story really inspiring, was starting to wonder whether I should be continuing but knowing this woman, and her determination, does give me a bit of a kick to get on with it. I know there are no guarantees in this business but knowing it CAN work out even for those of us with known 'issues' is exactly what I needed to hear about.

ladybee I think it's great that you want to get in touch with your pg friend, you are obviously being much stronger than you give yourself credit for. I know what you mean about snapping at your dc, I have been having periods of doing the same with mine. I guess it's pretty normal and I am sure your ds will forget about being sniped at in no time, they are pretty resilient.

ladybee you are a true inspiration. I think you're so strong and brave xxxx

Hi ladies, I'm home. The op was done this morning. The doc was v reassuring about a subsequent conception so fingers crossed.

I'm still a bit light headed and sore so I'll try and update properly tomorrow. Love to all xx

Mouse so glad they got you in today and also that they gave reassurance, very much needed at a time of worry. Hope you are getting lots of TLC at home. Sleep well and plenty of R&R tomorrow x

mouse - glad that you are home and all is done. Get lots of rest and just let yourself be looked after. xxx

mouse good to hear from you and I'm pleased they did the op for you and you got good reassurance.

I don't think I'm strong or brave, to be honest, maybe stubborn? not willing to accept that maybe I can't have what I want (just yet). I don't know, it helps I think that I had DS after just 1 mc, so didn't have to battle the doubt and go through the testing before having ANY child. That's why I'm in awe of this woman - and any woman - who had 5 before she was successful. And knew that she might have similar pain before getting her second. I don't know the details, whether she was diagnosed with any risk factors or just kept on going til she was lucky. That's why I'm hoping to get in touch. If she MC while on treatment I'd very much like to talk that through with her because that's something I'm really struggling with.

Morning all, sorry I've not been about much, things playing on my mind a bit so have been trying to stay away from here to stop me going completely potty.

mouse sorry to hear that you've had to go back in for another op, hope you're feeling a little less sore today. It's great news it's not molar and that the Dr is positive about future pregnancies. Be kind to yourself for now and give yourself recovery time x

Ali glad to hear you're positive about scan, and good idea about waiting the two weeks, if all is measuring as it should be to you then I'd stick with that, it sounds as though you are completely right and there's no reason why the bean shouldn't be a sticky. Fingers crossed for you x

bee I read yesterday after my session with Dr Google an article about a lady who'd had 18 mc before her first child, she eventually received treatment with Dr Shehata at Epsom and St Helier NHS, the stats are (almost) reassuring. 1 in 100 will have 3 consecutive mc, I in 600 will have 4 (which is where I'm at so far with no dc) and 1 in 15000 will have 5. What I took some hope from is that 4, however crap, looking at it in black and white, isn't that uncommon however 5 is. I'm giving things one last shot with St Marys and if that doesn't work out I'm going to see Dr Shehata. There's no reason why you won't have another dc, and you mustn't say that youre not brave or strong because you are, you've gone through heartbreak 4 times now and it's horrible, don't play down how strong you've had to be to pick yourself up after each fall. The article is here x

mummya how are you doing?

Waves to izzy, battery, jolls, moo and everyone else I know ive missed x

Thanks so much, brokenbarrenbrook for your lovely words and also great advice to bee. I am so sorry you've been through so much... it's awful. I've had 2 miscarriages and don't have any children, and I know how hard that is, so my heart really does go out to you. The statistics you found were encouraging, and I am glad that they have provided renewed hope. Remember... there is always hope, and everything is crossed for you. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

WAVES TO ALL

Extra big hugs to mouse Hope you are resting. Xxxxxxx

Hello everyone, sorry I have not been on much, I'm glad to say its because I have not much to report. All safe and boring and still feeling pregnant. I am going to get another blood test done tomorrow, just to reassure me that HCG is still rising nicely. I skipped my counselling session this week because I realised spending 15 quid on a blood test will do a whole lot more for my anxiety levels than spending 20 quid on the session. Not sure if I will do the same next week or go back to counselling, it has been amazingly helpful. I played with my SIL's 3 month old yesterday. Its hard to look at him without adding 2 months to his age and thinking about how mine would have been, but its much easier to be around him now that I have some hope of having another baby.

Ali sorry your scan wasnt as reassuring as you would have liked. What a shame that doctors are insisting on the LMP dates. I have already decided to lie to mine about the dates precisely to avoid that kind of thing, and (if I get that far) all the pressure to induce at the end too. With DS I got conned into accepting their dates and learned the hard way!

ladyB I am glad you have found inspiration, I do hope you will be able to learn something from this lady that will be useful to you. Have you had any luck setting up contact?

BB I am fine, thanks for asking, I guess because there has been no bleeding I have scaled down to just "yellow alert" instead of the high alert, constant panic of the first few days. Sorry you have had things playing on your mind. Feel free to share it with us if it helps xxx

mouse how are you doing? Getting lots of TLC at home I hope?

So how is the egg catching going this month for everyone else? Cant wait for all of you to join me, its very lonely being way down the bottom of the list on the other huge great thread.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Haven't been on for a while as trying to distract myself, so very sorry to hear what a crap time you've been having Mouse. Take care of yourself my love

Bee like everyone else says, you are amazingly strong. Thank you for giving me positivity too.

BB sorry to hear you're preoccupied. I do know what you mean about staying away from here a little bit.

Ali Glad the scan was ok. I know it wasn't as reassuring as you hoped but you do sound very calm and realistic about dates. I hope I can be calm as you sound if I ever get a BFP

AF turned up this morning and I'm surprisingly calm about it

Waves to battery, YRMOTB, Velvet, Chloe, Mamapower, Izzy, MummyA & everyone as must get some sleep.

Morning all, have just updated common room list

bb I too have noticed this - no idea there sorry! I need to add myself but I don't like seeing myself up and down all the time if you get my meaning.

Big wave to all, just at work so quick post.

I do need a big slap please - I have entered the world of complete madness and lunacy. A single friend of mine has been told by a medium woman that she is going to have twins. My single friend is really excited and quite smug about this (knowing I lost twins last year doesn't enter into her head) I am quite of this twins thing.

I mean REALLY though - she has been told this by a woman talking to dead people. How stupid am I ??

Hello peeps.

bb I think they're lurkers. At least one of them has had multiple mc's poor lady.

batteryhen There you go! The important points I'm picking up from your post is a) single friend and b) MEDIUM! But you know this already, so instead have a hug and a bitch about the Medium and slight insensitivity of said friend instead.

ali that sounds very "in order" to me. LMP is so crazily wrong so often. Glad you're not getting too worked up about it, you shouldn't waste energy worrying about things beyond your control.

Hello freezing Nice to hear from you. Glad you're ok re the RTD.

mummya Glad it's all going swimmingly for you. you really deserve it. I too have decided to lie to doctors re LMP. If when I ever get there.

izz How's it going? are you 2ww yet and did you catch anything on the one Ov stick per day? I've not even started yet. Lots of SFF though so far. It's not the usual 2ww that I hate, it's the 2ww I have to have before I ov and after my period has finished. I can handle the regular 2ww!

Waves to everyone else

In other news, I have been away this weekend staying In a Hotel Du Vin in York, which was ace as a birthday treat, and we went to a beautiful Parisienne bistro for our tea, and afterwards, DP PROPOSED!!!! So I am getting married!! So excited, and a teeny bit nervous! To those of you on my Bookface, please don't out us yet, We've got so many people to tell that we would like to tell personally before I put it on FB.

Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!! Congrats lovely! Xxx

YRMOTB Congratulations!! How exiting!! What a lovely proposal too!! Did he get down on one knee? I think you should rush to set a date and buy a dress and then you are BOUND to end up 9 months preggas on the day

broken one lady got taken off and then piped up that she wanted to stay on, the other two havent ever made contact but I did once put a link to this thread so they could. I think I should have chosen a better name for the stats thread ("Stats thread" would have been good) as its obviously confused some people.

lurkers if you are out there, feel free to jump into the conversation anytime or update yourselves when AF/BFP comes.

battery Owch, insensitive friend! smugness about pregnancies (even if they are only ones predicted by mediums) is the worst. I can relate to twin jealousy though, I have secret fantasies about having twins all the time - I am pretty sure the reality is very be much tougher and not really sure if I would like it in real life - but its my favourite escapist daydream.

I am "treating myself" to another blood test today

yrmotb woo-hooooooo!!!!!! Big congrats, lovely, what a fab weekend!!

I am on (I think!) cd17 today, starting opks an day 14 and got a smiley face yesterday so don't have to poas for the rest of the month (3 must be an all time low record for me!) and am in the middle of my 3 every day swi for SMEP. Like you, I actually prefer the 2ww (or in my case 7-10 days!) and find it much less stressful than the first half of the cycle so am starting to chill out even more

I have nothing as exciting as you to report, but we have found two lovely baby guinea pigs who will be coming to live with us at the end of March

battery > that's for you!!! I can't believe your friend is getting excited about mythical twins predicted by someone who claims to talk to ghosts - serious reality check needed!!! Take a deep breath and remind yourself it's all imaginary!

HUGE CONGRATULATIONS !

Woohooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! So happy for you, babes What fantastic news! Really happy for you and it's often when you have something else to focus on that things happen, so fingers crossed!

Can't believe the story about the twins and the medium. How insensitive... gah!!!!!

Would like to say I'm being cool and collected but not sure that's entirely true! Am glad I postponed scan but can't help worrying about every twinge... am driving myself mad! Have awful cold/flu at the mo, so have spent all weekend and today in bed, and that's a lot of time just to think...which isn't always a good thing. Have not allowed myself to open my pregnancy bag which I packed away after my last MC aand get out my pregnancy book. So worried about tempting fate... so it's just a waiting game. A looooooong waiting game!

Waves, hugs and jaffa cakes to all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Good luck with blood test, mummya xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Woo hoo to YRMOTB. That's so lovely. Oh I love a good wedding to talk about