TTC while breastfeeding - Part 2

[silkenladder]

This is the place to come to share the frustrations of ttc while still nursing.

Many of us are sleep-deprived, some of us don't even know if we're ovulating and none of us know whether taking agnus castus is a good idea or not. We all just want to do the best by the children we already have, but would really like to be pregnant again. Quickly.

Part 1 had plenty of graduates . Here's hoping Part 2 will be equally successful and supportive!

Hi I would just like to say to all you women who are thinking of maybe stoping bf to get pregnant that as long as your diets good you should not need to. I have 3 children ages nearly 4 3 and 1 and I haven't stoped bf since my first was born and it lovely to feed both your children at once and I am convinced that's why I have never had any jelersy between my children so it is possable and good luck I know how it feels as I am ttc no 4 (I must be mad ;))

good luck jaggy! I know what you mean, about temp taking. On holiday I only took temps for a few days when I thought I was ovulating, just to confirm it happened. Then I packed the thermometer away! I didn't intend to take temps at all, but it turned out I did want to confirm ov!

emjsouth hi - good luck with ttc. I know most women can get pg while feeding, I'm just beginning to wonder whether I'm one of them! DD is over 2 yrs now, I would love to feed another child at the same time. Its a case of balancing the desire for another... I don't believe its much to do with diet though. I think for some women their hormones just work well whether they are BFing or not - I've never had a good track record with hormones (irregular cycles etc) although bizarrely my periods have never been as regular as they are right now! Luteal phase a tad on the short side though (11 days) and I'm sure it used to be longer, so I do wonder if that's BF doing that.

Sorry, Isla, I've been meaning to reply for ages and always been interrupted.

I went to the new dr, told her about my short cycles. The minute I mentioned depo her face cleared and said it can take up to 2 years for things to normalize. She didn't examine me or do any tests, but I have to go back in June for my regular appt, so it was probably worth going just to get the "wait and see" option out of the way. I didn't mention the bf .

Since there's not much I can do about it atm I've been trying not to think about it too much. Dd has suddenly become rather insistent on her am feed, plus she's been waking early and I'd rather feed her than get up before 7. I'm on cd15 now, so hoping af won't turn up tomorrow.

jaggy did your af turn up? Good luck to you and everyone else.

Hi silken must be a weight off your mind to be doing something about it, even if that's the wait and see option. It must also be a relief that it can take 2 yrs for things to normalise - although thats not ideal, at least it may normalise on its own.

This month I tried drinking some grapefruit juice! I also cut out a feed, so now we are just on morning and evening feeds (DD is 25 months now!) This month ovulation was earlier - and for the first time in a few months I'm pretty confident I know I did ovulate and when - plus I had loads of EWCM. 3DPO now, we timed SWI pretty well, so I feel that we couldn't have done anymore this month and just waiting to see what happens.

yeah, af turned up on Wednesday. had got myself all worked up with imaginary symptoms as well.

so not temping was unsuccessful for keeping calm!

still only on approx 2 bf a day, no idea if it is affecting ttc. cycles are certainly fairly regular!

this month's plan is a different SWI pattern and trying to keep calm! didn't waste any tests but had got so excited that it was a bit of a big crash when af arrived.

good luck everybody :)

Still no af here.
I have decided we will keep trying for this baby till Christmas. If it doesn't happen by then we will remain a 3 child family.
I am now actively trying to wean Alfie too as I have had enough, unfortunately he has other ideas!
I am seriously thinking of sending on a holiday to Grandmas for a week.
Hoping that would break the cycle

Sorry i have been away from this thread so long. There was a long bout of nothing to report as no af.

I cut out day feeds at 17 months which was surprisingly easy then at 18.5 months (last week) I stopped the evening feed. This time there were a few tears so on the first night I held DS for around 5 mins til he calmed then cuddled him to sleep, next night the same but with a shorter holding time and then third night just cuddling. I still fed him in the early morning when he woke (around 1am and 4am ish).

After a chat with DH we then decided that this was sending the wrong signal so at that point I stopped feeding til morning proper, just cuddling and offering milk in a beaker.

Since friday he has only had one feed in the morning (sometime around 6.30am) and on sunday missed this altogether. Having gotten a bit fed up with the night feeds I am now quite sad as bf feels almost over. He hasn't asked for this later morning feed as such, I have offered, so I think it will stop soon of its own accord.

I guess I have doubts about whether we have done the right thing as up until now I felt very like QF desperate to get on TTC! AF turned up on Sun night so we succeeded in kick starting things on that front and he has started sleeping through til 5am so it is a success on there too.

I guess i just feel very much like its an end of an era and whilst I don't want to undo the hard work I didn't expect it all to happen so quickly. I always thought we would go til 2yrs at least. He is two weeks shy of 19 months now.

Do you think this is just my hormones changing making me sad? I guess I am a bit nervous now too as TTC becomes a reality so I am thinking about hopefully going through preg and birth etc again. I am a bit worried as well about coping with the disappointment if we don't conceive in a few months as until now TTC has been rather abstract, now with AF back (assuming my cycles are ok) I am in danger of getting rather consumed by it all.

Sorry for the long me me me post, I guess wanted to try and make sense of how i am feeling by writing it down. Also thought it might help those still waiting for cycles to resume. Also wondered what others would do about the last feed if they were me? Drop it or continue for a while longer? As I say DS isn't so interested now so perhaps it is the time to stop...

Hi all, sorry have been away so long, RL keeping me busy.

Last cycle I had a 7 day luteal phase which was a bit worrying, and on the current cycle I ovulated on day 8 so didn't even get a shag in! On 11DPO now so thinking AF will be here very soon (my old average was 12 days).

Maybe next cycle eh?

DS now 20 months and still feeding like mad. On a good day I can keep him down to 3 (morning, before nap, & before bedtime), but most days it is more than that. Normally still sleeps through 7pm-6am though. I wish he didn't reach for 'bees' every time he falls over or bonks his head, because he's so active that it happens several times every day!

Wishing everyone luck on the SWI. We're finding it difficult to manage, just so bloody tired all the time.

Isla it didn't seem like a relief after I'd been at the dr, as I was hoping more for a "right, we'll put you on the pill for two months and you'll be pg by summer!" She offered to give me the pill, but in a fairly reluctant way, and made it clear she thought I should wait, at least to the next appt. I've been back and forth with my feelings about taking the pill, but atm don't want it and feel ok about that.

Things sound promising for you this cycle . I stalked a few charts out on the previous thread and it was noticeable that people who swi at the right time got pg!

jaggy it's awful how easy it is to convince yourself you are pg, isn't it? I keep getting excited about high-ish temps and sore breasts even though I'm clearly not even ov-ing. Good luck this cycle.

LittleBoPeeps congratulations on getting af back. I also felt very sad about the thought of cutting out DD's am feed, as it felt like the beginning of the end. In the end it hasn't worked out and I feel I may have missed the boat with weaning on my terms/without tears, so if your DS is happy it might be for the best.

Yank DD is a few months older than your DS and has been tripping up noticeably less the last few weeks. Hopefuly your ds will grow out of it soon .

CD18 here and no af! This is my longest cycle since January. I probably should start temping again!

silken if you're at CD18 then that is promising! I'm hoping for a relatively normal cycle for you this month. I know waiting is boring, but my feeling is always if something can happen on its own, then thats the best way to do it. Which I know is really frustrating and easy for me to say, but your doc's cautious approach is just trying to do the best thing for you. I took agnus castus for one cycle I was so anxious to get pg. But I stopped taking it as I decided I need to try just as normal for a while, before I start doing all kinds of things (I decided grapefruit juice was ok, as I was in Florida and got a taste for it!)

jaggy I hope so much every month that this is the month, I just cannot help it. Your feelings are SO normal! Really hoping this is your month.

LittleBoPeeps yes, hormones!! Friends who have given up BF say they've had a hormone crash and felt weird afterwards. It'll just take a little while for your body to adjust (apparently, its the reduction of the feel good oxytocin, which is released when you breastfeed, that can make you feel blue after stopping BF). Yay for AF! Thats a good sign.

Yank my DD went through a similar phase of needing boob after falling over. Now though, she's fine with just morning and evening. I dropped daytime feeds when she was about 2 yrs (she's now nearly 2 yrs 2 months). She did ask for them for a while but accepted when I told her later. Referring to what silken says, I actually think that as they get older another window opens for weaning 'on your terms' as I'm almost having proper conversations with DD now about feeding. I've managed to shorten the morning and evening feeds (at bedtime she would be on for agggeeessss!), I did this just by telling her she could have some milk from one side in the morning, and after a couple of days she didn't ask for more afterwards.

Alfie will be 2 in July so hope I can start those conversations!

Can I ask you? If I was ovulating would I definately get af if not preg. I am just wondering as I have assumed I am not ovulating as no af so therefore not been swi as much as I would if I knew I was IYSWIM. I have def has ewcm and felt more like dtd at that time.
I have never temped but maybe I should. Not sure how accurate it would be due to nocturnal interruptions!

Queen I got EWCM when I was not getting AF, maybe I started noticing it when DD was 9 months old, and I got my period at about 14-15 months. So I think it was my body keeping on trying to ovulate but it didn't for a while. So sounds like things are happening, maybe AF will arrive soon! Have you tried ovulations tests when you have EWCM? You can buy a load of cheapies on the internet - thats what I did. If your in the mood and have EWCM might as well try - you don't know when that first ovulation will happen!

Af here again... :(

Aw, sorry isla :(

Only 2DPO i think so some waiting for me. Not feeling as optimistic this month really.

well I'll be optimistic for you then jaggy! good luck. I'm on month six now. Its very tiresome isn't it!

Month 8 for me. Think I was too spoiled after success month 2 the first time round!

Thanks for the optimism (sp?) :)

:( Isla

Have finished bf here - after feeding on demand for so long I felt it was just too confusing to DS to restrict him to one feed. He seems to have forgotten already - no longer asks etc - and I feel more positive about stopping since my last post so hormones must be stabilising.

DS has had a few moments of hysterical crying in the last week which may or may not be related to stopping bf. Doc says he has a viral infection so I'm hoping it is just related to that and he is back to his normal perky self soon but I can help feeling guilty/anxious about it all as it is so horrible to watch and nothing seems to calm him down. It happened at bedtime today and yesterday and then when he woke this morning. Plus other points - getting in the pushchair, car seat etc during the day. So not at times when he would have been bf in the past. I did a search on the mn archives for advice/similar experiences and people said that similar had happened when DC were unwell and/or overtired. Has anyone here been through this? He is 19months.

I prob shouldn't post here now as no longer fulfilling the thread criteria but I will check back as I would love to hear of bpf. It seems ages since the last one.

Whoop! Whoop!
AF has arrived! Yes! I am finally ovulating. However only 1 week since ewcm so does that mean my luteal phase is short? How long should it be?
Sorry for all who are getting af not bfp. For the record Alfie is 22 months and we have been ttc for 17 months. He still feeds a lot probably 5 or 6 times in 24 hours. I think the key change has been that he has started on occasion sleeping from 12 till 5.30.

Little bo peep my children change personality when they are ill and get upset by very silly things, however I think at that age they do get very frustrated by things and can get very upset. I find it usually improves as their speech and understanding improves

Yay QueenFee thats brilliant! 1 week since EWCM might indicate a short LP, but might not. I get CM (but not EWCM) during the luteal phase, maybe you were mistaking just creamy CM for EWCM? If it was an week LP (you want at least 10 days LP, ideally 12+) then don't worry too much. I've found cycles while bf can be a bit wacky! I'm sure some months my LP has only been 9 days, but other months I've had 12 days. Also my first couple of cycles were definitely wacky - one was only 23 days long so I'm pretty sure the LP was really short in that case.
Good luck with the TTC!!

LittleBooPeeps I agree with Queen, DD was get very whiny when ill or recovering. I don't feed her extra when she's like this (now - when she was younger I would have), its just part of being a toddler I think! Do check in - would love to hear of you getting your BFP!

Thats encouraging Isla
Will increase my swi efforts this month anyway
Hoping for that bfp!

Great news, QF. Are you feeling happier about ttc now? I know how it feels to be wanting to get pg but not know if you're even currently fertile.

My last cycle was 26 days, yay. Now on cd13, so should probably try to pin down dh for a bit of swi. Have guests here, though, which makes it more difficult.

Yes I feel happier. It was hard to be enthusiastic when I didn't know if there was any chance or not of conceiving.
So far on schedule with swi

Silken lol get creative with swi location

Looks as though I posted too soon, just went to loo and found blood in my knickers (sorry tmi ).

Glad you're feeling happier, QF. Hope you don't have too long to wait for your bfp.

Silken sorry that things haven't hapoened this month for you.
I am now on the dreaded 2ww - my 1st so I am sure it will seem even longer :(
Everything except the essential parts crossed (just in case I got my cycle length wrong )

keep up the swi, then, QF. I'll cross a few body parts for you as well. Good luck.

I'm hoping that this bleed might have been caused by ovulation. It was very light and started on cd13. According to TCOYF, the drop in oestrogen after ov can cause part of the uterine lining to break away. However, I suppose it could also happen without ov taking place. Should I get the thermometer out again? Votes, please (if anyone's still reading).