A sign of how far I've come...

[OracleInaCoracle]

Ive just realised that my period is late. after 5 years of knowing every last twinge of my cycle Ive just worked it out and my period was actually due on thursday. Im not going to test yet (natch) because, tbh, i dont want to know one way or another. but my god! 3 years ago I would have tested a week ago. and I would be obsessing and probably looking for baby clothes while mning. is it sad that my expectations have fallen so far, or good that I have grown out of my naivity?

thats great news! is there anything you can take for your chest? have you had the flu jab?

I've just been having honey and lemon - thought natural was best

No flu jab - haven't even been offered one -not sure I would take it if was offered though tbh..

sounds sensible. try childrens olbas oil too, just a drop will work wonders

Oh crap....I've been using the normal olbas oil - is that not ok??

Have been taking paracetamol but only 1 a day IF I really need it..this whole meds thing stresses me out!

it'll be fine

How are you feeling Lissie?

actually ok. am keeping myself very busy so that Im not really thinking about it.

and you know, im really not thinking too much about it. which is bizarre. im really not counting the days. Im not looking at babyware or asking dh to get my maternity clothes down. head is firmly in the sand.

does that sound normal?

Lissie - You won't know me as I have name changed (stalker issues) but we chatted along time ago! I was the same when I eventually fell successfully pg with DD - I was nearly 8 weeks before I tested as I was so sure AF was around the corner and even then after a +test, Dh had to drag me to the MW I as saw no point after 5mc as I refused to have any faith in my body. I had almost given up caring and just expected the worst.

Will quietly keep a couple of fingers crossed you don't haveto test before you feel good and ready.

thats exactly how i feel. it'll be more of a surprise if i AM upduffed than if im not. I dont see the point in testing. most of my mc's have been at 5-6w, so i cant change anything.

btw, who are/were you? pm me if youd rather not say outloud.

Lissie, Just wanted to say that I was thinking of you. Had ep, lost left tube etc myself so know a little of the pain you have been through. Will keep you in my prayers X

Lissie - sounds v normal - I think what you are going through is a self preservation thing - and its good in a way as like you said, it can't change anything

I am thinking of you and you can always pm me if you need to chat off board - mwah!

ok tiniest smidge of light brown when i wiped this morning. nothing since.

but ribs hurt so may have to tset tomorrow anyway.

fuck.

Good luck hon xxx

thank you, i really dont know what to do. i will need to take some tablets today or tomorrow, but i obviously dont want to if i am pg. i know that spotting doesnt necessarily mean im not pg, i bled from 5w-21w with ds. but equally, not every spate of spotting is implantation nor is it a mc. i might not even be pg.

I'm proud of you. xxx

thank you, im quite proud of myself tbh. i will buy a test tomorrow though, i dont want to, but if i dont start taking my anti-inlamms before it gets bad I will struggle, and if thats for no reason...

OMG Lissielou what a totally shite time you have had!, I really hope you get a sticky bean this time...I so know what you mean by "being a slave to your body" I've had 3 mc's on the run, and I thought that was alot...but bless you hun you have a terrible time.

Thinking of you! and will pop back to see how you get on. Good luck XX

thank you anytime. its weird, when people are at our story i always think "its not that bad is it?" but then i think about it properly and if anyone told me that story I would be horrified. keeping my fingers crossed for you too x

Lissie - I'll check back tomorrow to see how you are

Mind you, according to the meedja frenzy, surely we should all be in a knicker wetting state of excitement at pending Royal nuptials and forgetting our own lives...eww..another year of it before they actually get hitched

OMG OMG how brave you are lissie, and my goodness, you have come a long way. tis my aim to get to where you are but i have so much anxiety around it for similar reasons to what you say.

Another week...how can you wait that long???

After 5 years of trying and 5 mcs, i still have to test sometimes a week early
Its like an obsession with me.

Am a slave to my body.

puss, i know. I have managed to avoid every news item on it though. but its going to get worse...

brokeoven, its a horrible feeling isnt it? I could happily now go to sleep and wake up in 2 weeks. if only. are you under a RMC cons?

Aha!! One small FB allusion and I'm onto you like a bloodhound. Crossing every single digit. And we're dangerously close to Tiverton here, so quite a few extra digits available.

hahahaha the "cant take pills" thing? and thank you. dh is being great. everytime i come out of the loo he raises his eyebrows. i shake my head and he just half smiles.

Yup, that very thing.

thinking of you lissie hope your pain has died down. x