the ANTI christmas traditions thread

[InterruptingKid]

we always find me doign LEgo alone when the kids have fecked off and got bored

I'll join you if you promise not to resurrect nay more old threads with the words Christmas traditions in them

god newbite parents

twee tastic

Obviously I meant I'd join you on this thread, not in your living room building Lego!

I still don't understand why we have to wear really posh clothes when all we are doing is sitting around eating and watching telly all day.

no MM its glittery knits

that you wear only once a year?

ah but you have the style challenge of findnig something festive, attractive and comfortable. i think jeggings may not be it...

ik you are curmudgeon.

How about sparkly shorts?

My christmas tradition is that I will get stressed about who is going to be where, when.

I will move heaven and earth to organise lunch for group of friends and their children, and one particular set will cancel at the last minute, pleading venezualan parrot flu

We will overcater massively, and there will be far too much left over. Apart from one component, where there will be not quite enough.

Boxing day, we will trail to PIL where the teenagers will sulk, try to watch unsuitable DVDs, and formerly SIL would try and make others feel guilty about what they eat. Fortunatly we will lose this last one this year as she is divorcing BIL.

I don't even do Father Christmas, so doubly bah at the tradition threads, which are so twee as to make my teeth itch

oh yes genius mm, sequinned shorts is the very essence of irritating kid's style. she must get some.

Rememberance as you are adding pancetta and marsala wine to the sodding sprouts as you juggle 14 saucepans on your 4 hob cooker that NO ONE GIVES A SHIT about fancy sprouts.

no and dont cook xmas pud
no one eats it ffs

adn dont wrap in designer paper

god yes, sprouts and nuts! as if being in teh same room as my bil after he has had sprouts isn't bad enough.

Finding the home made bread sauce still in a small saucepan, or some fancy vegetables still in the oven after the meal.

...adn the best present in your knitwear in MAy

Designer paper?

What's the sprouts recipe Slubber? I quite like the sound of it actually....

yes! yes! Darrell that is so true.

My mother's crestfallen face as she emerges from the garage clutching a tupperware pot of home made cranberry and port sauce she forgot to bring out and heat up.

And Christmas Crackers, what is all that about really? The jokes are rubbish, the plastic things are tat and noone wants to wear a crepe crown, really they don't.

my dad keeps his crown well intot he new year

It entertains us all

Tradition or the same old rut?

The cats will trash the tree, the dishwasher and heating will break down as will I.
The children will find my stash of good chocolate then go hyper, dh will 'only want socks', blackcurrant juice will spill over the good table cloth, the marzipan saboteur will Strike Again leaving a naked cake.....

Wake me up when it is spring.

best christmas for us was the year my mother set the oven on fire
still ate the lunch (great british spirit)

One from my teenage years: walking home with my brother after dark so we can get stoned and moan about our family in peace. No chance of that anymore

margaritas, I could give it to you and you would be thinking up until 20 mins before you serve christmas dinner

'oh how lovely, super fancy festive sprouts, and don't they look attractive in good housekeeping'

20 mins later all you are thinking is

'fuck fuck I hate you you bastard little sprouts, where the shitting hell are the vacuumed packed chestnuts that are meant to go in too. I CANNOT GET THE PACK OPEN. Where are the cocking scissors shit shit shit etc'