Xmas day cooking disasters

[Empress13]

We always have the illusion that a perfect dinner will be served on Xmas Day but the reality can be so different! On a light hearted note tell us your Xmas Day cooking disasters. I always remember the time my SIL’s oven gave up the ghost in the middle of roasting the Turkey she had to finish it in her sister’s oven !

Yep, finished off the turkey under the grill one year.

One year, we discovered after not using the extractor fan over the stove for quite a while, that it was now home to millions of flies, which were all blown out all over the food cooking on the stove.

My sister didn't want to give up, so looked up online the legal limit for insects in commercial food, to see if we were still in with a shot. It was shockingly high how many bugs are allowed in food.....Anyway, this was still far more!!!!

We didn't eat it, don't worry!!!!!!

Got home from visiting my Dad in hospital early evening on Christmas day (2023). Opened the fridge only to realise I'd forgotten to defrost my meal 🥴

Not a devastating disaster more of a "Really?" minute.

Wanted the stuffing balls to be crispier than they came out. Decided to grill the buggers. Big fire. Much panic.

Understandable on both points.

Twice I've experienced electrical failures, once at someone else’s house and once at ours. DH was working nights so spent the day fixing the electrics and then had to go to work.

Husband put the oven on grill instead of roast two years running. Sat down to Christmas dinner at 10.30pm. He’s not allowed to cook anymore.

When we had just moved to the area, BC, we put a chicken in the oven for our Christmas lunch. We popped over to the pub, that we hadn't been to before. Everyone was so welcoming to us (staff and punters), that we ended up staying for over two hours. We got home to a very overcooked chicken. We had a works Christmas hamper containing a tin of ratatouille, so that was what we ate, alongside some nibbles.

Other than that, we (I) always forget to put something out - bread sauce, parsnips, whatever.

When I was still living with my parents, the tradition was that the men went to the pub while the women cooked.

My mum and I slaved lovingly in the kitchen producing a feast for 10 - 12 people. We waited and waited for the menfolk to come home. An hour later they rolled in steaming drunk, full of hugs and kisses. My mum threw the food away, and then poured all the alcohol down the sink.

There wasn't a murder.

I once served and we ate a whole Christmas dinner – then I realised I had totally forgotten the stuffing in the bird! DH said he didn't like to ask in case I said “I’ve not made any so tough”.

Another year I had a veggie dish for DD and forgot to even get it out of the freezer, never mind put it in the oven for 30 mins. I was about to serve up so had to blast it hastily in the microwave.

@JimmyGrimble my DH also always puts the grill on instead of the oven (we have lived here 12 years). He doesn't cook the Chr dinner

Not a disaster but something I’ve never been allowed to forget 😂

dinner nearly ready guests starting to sit at the table etc, I decided to just nip to the loo really quick and freshen my makeup ( got to look good 😂) so quick flick with the lippy and another touch up with the mascara.

go to kitchen and bend over the oven and open the door as I look in. Full face full of the heat I obviously closed my eyes and the heat from the oven on my newly applied mascara, well my eyes sort of glued closed.

i remember my sil getting me some remover wipes and someone else helping me sit down while she removed my make up. To this day I have never again refreshed my makeup before dinner, it’s not worth it

He did it deliberately 😂

Not so much cooking but meal related , we travelled 500 miles in Christmas Eve traffic to spend Christmas Day with MIL from hell. She previous suggested instead of cooking we got an Indian takeaway from a nice Indian restaurant near her. Asked serveral times if definitely open on Christmas Day she said she knew owners and it was,

Got nervous when she hadn’t phoned but kept saying it was ok, she then phoned and found it was shut, we tried a few others but nothing. So we had a weird concoction from her cupboards (she had nothing Christmassy in) around 9pm which included backed beans. Dh has a row with her, I went to bed and we drove home early next day.

The year my parents left my sister and me in charge of a goose in the oven while they went to church, we were hungover, overslept and came down to a kitchen full of smoke. The fat had gone bonkers.

We still speak in hushed tones about The Year The Dog Ate The Beef Joint.

Mum forgot to put the pigs in blankets in once, there was nearly a riot.

OK, name and shame, who left it too near the edge?

I remember my mum getting tipsy and knocking a full glass of white wine all over my dinner when I was about 9

In the end, it's just one day and, just one meal. To put such incredible pressure on it, for everything to be perfect perfect perfect, it's kind of ridiculous. I mean I can see people putting a lot of pressure on a wedding because you're only supposed to get married once... But even that's ridiculous to spend so much time effort and money on what is basically just a party celebration two people legally shacking up.
Nobody will remember the Christmas dinner that you prepared, no matter how fancy it was, no matter how much it costs, and how much effort it took, nobody will really remember it. They'll only remember how they felt about the time. Did they feel welcomed, was it uncomfortable and tense full of small talk and awkward moments... Or was it relaxed and welcoming and friendly and fun...
Cuz you can have the most awkward party with the most amazing perfect food, or you can have the most fantastically festive atmosphere with food that turned out like a disaster and you had to end up opening up emergency snack foods to serve family style, it really doesn't matter in the end. So don't knock yourself out trying to make the perfect meal, there is no such thing as perfection. People won't remember the food, they'll only remember the experience.

In the middle of pretty much single-handedly cooking the dinner for visiting family, DH, me and mum. Everything safely navigated as DH hovered just within my eyeline, not being helpful. He asked if he could do anything; I said yes, where is the stock that I set aside after carefully simmering, blending and reducing it for the gravy?
His reply: Errrrrm……you mean in that jug I poured down the sink?

😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

Yep, my DH did this a few years ago. The giblet stock that I started on Christmas Eve (per Delia) was poured away.

Not Christmas Day but Christmas Eve. I had ordered a fresh turkey to collect that day but they presented me with a frozen one. I had to sit it in the sink of our granny flat, which is quite warm in summer, and allow it to do a quick defrost and pray to God that it didn’t go too far while I was asleep and start breeding bacteria.

However, all was fine. But I will never forget spending the day panicking.

I did chicken for Ds , vegetarian main course for DH,DD and me
Mountain of roast potatoes , cauliflower cheese , pureed turnip, homemade Yorkshire Puddings (epic) and gravy .
I put the carrots and sprouts in a glass dish to serve and clumsily smashed it on the sink .
DC were not bothered by the lack of vegetables when there's roast potatoes and Yorkshires going !

My aunts cat ate a big hole in the side of the uncooked turkey for the 2nd year running. She just filled the hole with stuffing and cooked it anyway. She said nobody will know 😑
I had a gastric band one year, it was really tight. I was spending xmas with a friend and her extended family. Every mouthful of the food I took got stuck in the band and I had to rush off to be sick. After the 5th attempt to eat I just gave up, apologised to the appalled crowd and went home to die. I wasnt invited back.

My mum had a couple.

She started hosting for everyone because before that we had to leave our new toys to visit Nana and Grandad for the presents Santa had left there.

So me, my brother, parents, grandparents and two uncles (who as they got older brought girlfriends with them).

Mum brings the turkey to the table, my Nana notices there are still giblets in a plastic bag inside. My Nana mentioned it every single year @StruggleFlourish

Another year, we were in a different house with a washroom on the back so my mum put the turkey to defrost, he put a box over it to keep the cat away. The cat was no dunce, she moved the box and helped herself to the breast.

I think my mum served the turkey all ready sliced up that year.