Christmas presents does this sound rubbish?

[WeepingAngelInTheTardis]

Ds10 - oculus meta 3, oculus £50 gift card, 10 manga books, wireless headset, ps5 controller, 2 small boxes of lego. Few random small bits like notebook & pens, ps5 controller holder.

ds14 - 2 playstation 5 games, 1 PC game + the dlc pack, 10 dvds hes asked for, 1 book, watch, 2 LED lights. Few small random bits bracelets hes asked for, elastic band gun, robux gift card.

I feel so rubbish, really struggling to afford christmas this year! Do you think this will do? :(
it doesnt look like much at all but ds14 games came to £250 & ds10 oculus was around £300! they havent asked for much but worried they will be dissapointed.

I always bulk up with Christmas chocolate, sweets and baking kits from the supermarket. It adds to the pile, but is inexpensive.
Once my daughter wanted a broccoli! I have no idea why. It arrived and we ate that on Christmas day.

Sounds fine to me and I'm sure your boys will love what you've bought them 🙂

Sounds good to me. Mine (age 11-18) have a similar amount, plus some clothes/ pjs/ socks/ underwear/ toiletries they need anyway and selection boxes.

It’s a great amount of presents for your kids. Hopefully they’ll be thrilled and love them all and be grateful. It’s a bit more than we spend on 4 slightly younger children. But we do buy for relatives and friends too.

Gently, I would consider your approach to Christmas and presents. You are spoiling your kids (in a very loving) but very sacrificial way. It’s a generous thing to do, but to go without food yourself throughout the year, not buy gifts for each other and not buy for family etc, will teach the children that life revolves around them. I’m not saying they’re not wonderful etc. But you are making them an extreme example of being the most important. Modelling kindness by helping them chose gifts others would like, showing them that your partner matters too, that money is valuable and they have to narrow down a wish list, that their mother is important enough to not skip meals for this years latest game- all far bigger gifts in the long term. I feel like you’re trying to be generous to them, but missing some of the most important life lessons. (Sorry if this is mean or patronising, just my initial thoughts!)

Plus Christmas and birthdays are the only time I buy toys so probably less than others spend through the year (clothes are Christmas, birthday plus replacement of essentials as needed, books as needed)

If they aren't happy with those hauls from a financially struggling parent, I'd give them a kick up the bum as well.

Ours got £100 to £150 each on presents. They still get that aged 27 and almost 31.

Times really don’t change that much tbh. You should not be going without food to afford presents which are essentially just more stuff.

I could afford to spend thousands on my children but I never have and I never would. They need to know the value of money. Give both boys a budget of £150 - £200 in future and stick to it.

And as a parent of a child with learning disabilities you need to be the one to educate him about money. Start to give him an allowance and let him choose what to spend it on. Take him food shopping or let him help you with the online shop. He needs to start to understand money as it’s one of the most important life skills .

We do, he gets £10 a week and has to budget it. I take him to the shop and hes learning how to pay in noney/card and count out what hes buying and how to budget if he wants to keep some money for robux or whatever. Same at school every week at the tuck shop. But rome wasnt built in a day takes time.

It sounds amazing tbh and probably even more than I'd be doing

Would you be choosing to eat instead?

Classic mum guilt.

My daughter said she doesn't remember what presents she got last year.

I always put a lot of thought in, spend a few hundred, and pile them up over December under the tree.

I'm ahead this year and I said how many more presents do you think I will put under there? SHe said, 10.

There's already 10 and it's cost £250 already.

I'm planning another £100 but it includes jewelry this year as she's older.

I'm still feeling it isn't enough. It's absolute madness. It's actually excessive. I just love spoiling her, and she knows it.

I think less is more. I think 3 thoughtful gifts that say 'I know you and support your interests' is better than £5,000 spent on stuff, honestly.

I wouldn't repeat missing out on meals to fund next Christmas but it's done now and I'm sure your kids will be chuffed with their gifts. It's hard with older kids, mine is getting a PS5 with 1 game included this year and it was so expensive. It feels odd not getting him anything else but realistically it'll be some shower gel and new pants and that's it. He can save up for more games etc himself.

That’s a lot! Mine have never had even half that amount.

@WeepingAngelInTheTardis please don’t feel rubbish about any of this. You have put plenty of thought and care into choosing gifts that your DC will appreciate. I would say it’s a generous amount of presents without being too much. Your DC are very lucky!

Sadly, so many children don’t have such loving, kind parents or their parents are in the terrible position of not being able to afford anything.

I think you already know that spending £700 on 2 kids at Christmas is generous and more than enough. The pile often gets smaller as our children age, but the individual gifts are worth more. Christmas shouldn't be about you going without food , you should spend within your means.

Yeah your right to be honest! I know both will be chuffed as ive actually listened to what they’ve asked for rather than buying tat for the sake of it. I won’t be buying anymore other than a selection box each.

what makes you think spending this sort of money and buying all these things isn't possibly enough. That's quite. I think it's a lot and more than plenty.

I have to admit I’m curious about what your Christmas usually looks like if you think there’s not much this year.
As others have said, this is already a lot spent completed to some families, but also less than others. If it’s less than usual, I would pre-warn them it won’t be as much this year so they’re not disappointed. It’s all about what they expect really!

That’s a lot!!!

For all those saying that’s a shocking amount of money, do you have teenage boys?
I have a 20 year old DS at Uni and a 15 year old DS. We can afford (within reason) to spend money on Christmas presents, usually about £500 each plus stockings. When they were younger, we’d only spend £100 or so and it would buy many boxes of playmobil, Lego etc.
£100 now won’t even buy the youngest a pair of football boots as he is in adult sizes. For all those expressing “shock” that the poster has dared to spend money on her children, what do you think is an appropriate amount to be spending?
Or do you genuinely think a 15 year old should literally have 3/4 of a pair of football boots or trainers. Or 1/4 of a phone or just a hoody for Christmas. Because a £100 won’t buy you an entire phone, or a pair of trainers or a pair of football boots as it’s not enough money. Or are you so out of touch with the cost of raising teenage boys who seem to grow a foot over night that you have forgotten how much things actually cost.
Yes you can do Christmas on a budget for younger children quite easily, I suspect it’s also relatively easier for girls as they appreciate nick nicks, jewellery and make up etc but teenage boys cost a lot of money. There is no way of making it cheap unless you literally buy 1 gift and lets be honest no parent unless they have no other option wants their child to have 1 gift on Christmas morning. So can we stop with the pious “I only got a Barbie, an orange and a lump of coal for Christmas” and appreciate that things are ridiculously expensive and Christmas will cost money. And stop giving the OP a hard time for trying to make it nice for her children.

@mrsconradfisher did you miss the part where the OP went without food so she could buy all this?
Sorry but that's ridiculous.

Children to not NEED piles of presents. It's naff anyway. They need a 2 or 3 nice presents and some smaller stocking fillers. It's quite enough.

I have DT’s in their mid 20’s and are lucky that we could spend 000’s each Christmas but don’t.
You can get phone contracts for £10 a month and hoodies and football boots are available at supermarket prices. Families on a budget give their DC’s a good Christmas without spending a fortune.

In the nicest possible way, you are an idiot, OP.