Christmas dinner that’s not Christmas dinner

[MorrisonsBitch]

So for the last 7 Christmas's, I have hosted for 10 of us (my DM, in laws + us 5) but this year I’m really not feeling it.
I have 3 young children and honestly I’m so sick of being stuck in my tiny kitchen and the stress!
so I have said that I’m happy for them all to still come to me and I will host but it won’t be a 4 course meal so im thinking some sort of buffet? Like a deconstructed Christmas dinner but they help themselves. So far I have

turkey crown sliced
beef joint sliced
mini roast potatoes
mini Yorkshire puddings
pigs in blankets
stuffing balls
sliced buttered cobs
prawn ring with lettuce & sauce on side
a seafood platter
Sliced sprouts with chestnuts/ bacon
a couple of salads (green, potato and a grain one)
some sort of eton mess/pavlova concoction
profiteroles
a chocolate dessert
mince pies
cheese board with usual crackers and fruit

so my normally traditional mum is loving this idea but my in laws not so much!
does anyone have any suggestions that I can make in advance but is really Christmassy to help persuade them? I’m happy to swap things around

Sorry ..but that sounds harder work than a Christmas dinner .
You could just get everything pre prepared and it just bungs in the oven
Or ask people to bring different dishes with them to help out

Sounds like hard work OP. Traditional would be easier than your suggestion.

Honestly, this spread feels chaotic and a weird sort of compromise. Is it a buffet? A roast? A bbq? Who knows. Pare it right down. How about a centrepiece of turkey (or a couple of chickens - much easier!) and then all salads. Ploughman’s style with a nice roast ham? Dinner when I host Xmas isn’t a discussion, I let people know what Im
doing, I don’t invite feedback, and people can choose to come or not.

Why do you have a 4 corse meal
That's just extra work
We are vegans ,so we have a selection of whatever offerings the supermarket have instead of turkey
Roast and mash and pigs in blankets and a selection of veg and gravy
Dessert is vegan ice-cream and mince pie or again whatever the supermarkets have in that's vegan and new
Then coffee
I cook every year ..it's not particularly difficult,I have it down to a fine art now .always prep the veg myself on Christmas eve
Sorry to hear you find it so difficult
We all love our Christmas dinner ,it's the best meal of the year ,I'd not give that up for anyone

It sounds lovely, but, tbh, it also sounds like as much work as a traditional dinner, and with more dishes afterwards.

I do understand the sentiment though. Personally, I don't find my kids have much patience for a long dinner. We do the starter at lunchtime, the main at tea time, and a pudding later. It leaves a lot of time in between to enjoy the day.

Maybe you could cook the meat the day before, and reheat?

If you have done all the Xmas cooking for ten years then do whatever the heck you like!

To be honest I did a buffet last year and it was a lot of work, but I planned it very simple (pre-made with vegan and vegetarian options); then the kids begged for turkey, Yorkshire puds and gravy and roast potatoes and parsnips and in the end I made dinner AND a veggie buffet. Nightmare

If i read it correctly you thinking of serving the meat, potatoes, sprouts and yorkies hot, right? So you’ll still be in the kitchen.

I would not do this. I would do:

• hot turkey crown
• gammon ham or sausages which you pre-cook and warm up slices in the day
• ready-made gravy
• boiled potatoes
• Frozen peas and parsnips
• stuffing balls made in advance and reheated in oven or airfryer

Buy a frozen cheesecake for dessert

Then I’d ask PIL to bring starters for everyone and I’d ask DM to bring a second dessert

You’re not a restaurant so if you’re hosting you can decide!

That seems more work!

id do two courses of standard Christmas fare, but keep sides basic. I’m doing turkey, vegan thing (bought), roast potatoes, mixed roasted vegetables (carrots, parsnips and sweet potatoes), mashed swede, red cabbage (slow cooker), steamed Brussels (microwave steamer) cauliflower cheese (bought frozen), plus peas for the fussy ones. Dessert is Christmas pud (bought), mince pies (made in advance) and roulade or similar (bought). I can prep in under an hour then it’s just the logistics of feeding them into the ovens etc have a large range cooker so not too much juggling. This is for 12 including 1 vegan, 2 vegetarians and some fussiness

Why did you ever do this when you have 3 young children, and more to the point why did all those adults sit back and let you?

That's all your kids are going to remember, is you stuck in the kitchen skivvying around.

Where is your DH in all this? Why aren't your parents and your inlaws bringing cooked meats and other foods with them?

Just do main course and pudding and get someone else to bring the pudding? Your idea sounds like just as much work as normal. Also why can't someone else cook or help if you are hosting? You aren't their personal chef.

What age are the kids would you get away with something simple for them maybe served earlier? Then they can play with toys?
I’ve done a lounge picnic for little ones before which my guest has brought and provided.

mum brings dessert
sister brings trifle
other guest brings cheese board
don’t do a starter / guest brings something cold

leaving me with a Christmas dinner
nigella ham done the day before served cold
cook chicken and leave to rest while chucking aunt Bessie’s potatoes in oven.

boil carrots/broccoli
airfry pigs in blankets
micro red cabbage
pop yorkies in for last 5 mins (frozen)
gravy made week before and frozen

I also let mum “set the table” keeps her busy and out of the kitchen mithering me!

I’ve also used a small hostess serving dish to keep veg warm. Can be picked up very cheaply and hep with timings

You've really not solved the issue of being stuck in the kitchen, rather just chopped and changed the food. I think you need to think if you even want to host people for food - can you not have just one Christmas where people visit to see you for nibbles and fizz or something and you don’t have to host a huge meal? I’d be bothered all my kids remember of me at Christmas is being locked away in the kitchen. I’m shocked all these adults have just let you crack on all this time and not offered to share the load, especially with little kids.

Would it not be better to have the majority served cold, so cold meat and salad? So you could pre-cook the meat and then you don't have to worry about keeping stuff warm, have some exotic and really nice salads with cold turkey?

Quite honestly anyone who complains about ANY food that someone else is preparing and serving doesn't merit a second invite. They either come and shut up (or supply the food) or don't come, their choice.

Big bowls of curry and rice with poppadums, naans and chutneys. If they don’t like it, they can host.

I host every year - my mum and stepdad plus me and my kids (23,21 +16)

I do everything ready to go - roast spuds with beef fat pre prepared, frozen veg, chicken in a bag ready to roast, beef in red wine you just shove in the oven, pigs in blankets, pre made bread sauce, stuffing in a packet, gravy granules, etc

never had a complaint! And it’s just about writing down timing and oven space- we don’t do starters and have cheese cake on hand for later along with cheese and crackers

I agree with the PP, that looks like more effort than just cooking a roast dinner and it's a random mix of foods. If you really don't want to do a Christmas dinner I think you need to do something much simpler such as a ham in the slower cooker or a big stew / casserole / chilli / curry in one pot with rice or potatoes and sides.

If you want to make things easier and do a buffet then my advice would be sack off the roast dinner theme. You’re still cooking the meat, yorkies, roasties etc- it’s no easier than just doing a dinner at that point.

For minimal effort & maximum ease I’d say just get yourself to m&s/Tesco/Iceland and get a selection of their Christmas picky party bits, cheese, crackers, crisps, all with nice easy instructions for oven & air fryer, set a timer and you’re golden. Pop it in, walk away, get it out when timer goes off and stick it on the table and you’re done.

I agree your plan sounds much harder than a regular roast dinner.

Honestly ? After years of hosting I can tell you we once did the buffet thing for Xmas dinner. It was much more work than a meal. My advice is cut the courses down and do all the prep you can.

We always have a buffet on Xmas day. The hot meal is on Xmas Eve. I refuse to spend the whole day cooking when there are presents to open.

You are making life more complicated. Why do you have to do 4 courses? Just do a roast and pudding. Get a platter or cheeses if you must. Open a bag of crisps with the wine to start. And why not delegate? Ask mil to bring a pudding and mum to bring prepared veg or something. You don’t have to be a martyr and do it all yourself.

As you've hosted for 7 years and have three young children I can't quite believe that when you (quite understandably) said you were going to do something easier this year someone else didn't step in and say it was their turn.

Could everyone bring something for a traditional dinner?
Can your other half cook for a change?

I would find a roast easier but pre prepared veg, par cooked potatoes day before, premade gravy. No starters but good quality canapés instead. Get someone to bring pud or we just do cheese and chocolates.

seems like a lot of work and effort still

Tell them you doing a different country each Christmas now.

Start with Austrian:
Massive goulash, nice bread
Apple strudel for desert

If anyone wants to bring homemade mince pies then they make it

Next year: Italian. Pizza!

I did this...once...it's more work than chucking everything in the oven and doing Christmas dinner.
Can you delegate turkey to someone, deserts to someone else, condiments gravy etc to some one then you've just got to do the veg.