If a gift is ‘on the way’, when is it arriving?

[Itsaswelltime]

told (on 25th Dec.) that a gift is on its way to me; it’s jointly for Christmas and my birthday which was at start of Dec. I think it’s jewellery. When do you think it’s reasonable for me to expect it might arrive? I’m thinking perhaps it’s being engraved, how long does that usually take?

I'd have thought that "on its way" means it has actually been posted/put in the hands of whoever is delivering it. At the very minimum, it would mean "ordered".

So if it wasn't ordered till say 23/24th Dec, it could be that the providing company won't start processing it until after New Year. So if it needs engraving, maybe that won't happen till today or tomorrow, and then be posted out, so maybe you'll get next Monday/Tuesday?

If it's coming via Royal Mail don't hold your breath. I'm still waiting for something posted on 15th December

Surely you ask the gift giver?

I don’t want to seem impatient and rude, even though I am very impatient!

I am not sure how it’s arriving but presume not Royal Mail as we are abroad and no reason to have a gift from U.K. However postal services here can also be shit! Am not sure whether on the way means in the post or not yet ready for collection or delivery.

Is it the giver who has told you its on the way or the company? If its from a person then on the way could mean it's in the post, or they hadn't bought it yet!
If the former then you just need to wait politely, I'd NEVER ask for a gift I had been offered, either it arrives or it doesn't.

Yes, the giver, they have said it a few times so presume they have bought it, (my birthday was a month ago now). I know I can’t ask, that would be really grabby.

I’d say they haven’t bought it yet, otherwise they’d be a bit more specific about it!

I have a parcel here for my brother, I told him it would likely arrive after Xmas and apologised for the tardiness, but I’ve been busy with celebrating and going away for new year so haven’t actually done anything with it yet!

However if yours is likely to be jewellery and you imagine engraved it sounds like something/someone more special, so hopefully you’re not just being fobbed off.

I don’t know how to ask them without it seeming grabby.

If it’s someone you see often anyway, I’d maybe squeeze it in while mentioning something else about Xmas. You could frame it that you’re excited about receiving it and want to let them know it’s not here yet, just in case they think you’re ungrateful for not thanking them already.

If it’s someone you don’t see often and would usually message then you might need to be a bit more direct about bringing it up. But maybe still go with “do you have a tracking number as I’m worried it hasn’t arrived and a couple of other parcels I’m waiting for seem to have gone astray so I’m hoping it isn’t lost (sad face)”

They haven't bought you anything. Sorry op.

Presents from my brother were always in the post.

These are all great advice, thank you. @Tumbler2121 Sorry about your DB.

The gift is from my DH so I can’t see why he would make it up? We had said no gifts for Christmas and he already gave me a (hideous but expensive) ‘surprise’ one.

Still no sign of gift, I tried to make a reference to it yesterday but no news.

It was DS’ birthday yesterday which DH also had difficulty taking care of.

I posted a parcel to Germany first week of December and it arrived two days ago. I’ve been saying it was on its way for the whole month (it sounded like I was lying so I hope they’ve checked the stamp to show I wasn’t!)

I really think it's a cop out with a ' on its way ' gift . Get it ready for the day and if it needs engraving or similar then plan it earlier .Simples .

I think I'd ask him outright has he ordered it? As much to know about the company who are meant to be delivering it.

Could it be made to order or could it have been on back order?

If it was a friend I'd maybe say that gift has never turned up.
It's such an awkward situation you don't want to ask for it but you don't want them to think your rude and not thanked them either.

If they haven’t shown you a tracking number, I wouldn’t believe it’s “on the way”

I would suspect he hasn't even ordered it. I'd say 'yet' but I think that's optimistic. He's counting on you feeling too awkward to ask when it's arriving so you will write it off.

Ask him what date your present is being delivered and ask whether he needs to let the company he ordered it from know that it's lost in the post.

@hattie43 I agree! DH has many great qualities but this is certainly not one of them, his whole family is pretty shit at the ‘occasion’ of gifts even though they’re happy, generous, loving people. e.g. gifts are never wrapped and nearly always late

Thanks @Needanewname42 He (DH) knows I haven’t received it as he hasn’t given it to me.

We have been really, really strapped for cash so I feel it’s just too grabby to ask.

Thanks @LizzieBananas I agree, although we don’t really ever share tracking numbers when we order stuff, especially not presents (unless urgently need the other one to pick up something but to be honest we both pass the post office at least once a day.)

Thanks @mewkins I might do that. 🦸🏼‍♀️💪🏻

It still hasn’t arrived! I am so excited but on the other hand feel like a bit of a tit

Sorry but I don't think he has ordered you anything. I can't see how something would take this long- unless he was waiting on January pay day.

The first thing I thought of when I read 'on the way' is that there is no gift.

My DB used to promise this about my DC birthdays all the time. I eventually said I know that means you haven't bought anything so let's just agree to not buy gifts! He admitted I was right!

You can ask for the tracking to see if it's legitimate. If he stumbles then he's lying.

Thanks, everyone. I would ask but it feels grabby

I would just say "hey, what happened to that thing you said was on its way?" In a breezy way