How many presents

[Claz88]

How many presents does everyone get their young kids (under 7). My husband thinks 20 each + stocking is too much, but I think it's wonderful to see presents under the tree!

Something to do
Something to wear
Something to read
Something they want.

That’s all they need. Any more is too much. Their little brains can’t cope with more.

Your husband is quite right.

I agree with your husband. Sure they won't know what they got if there are twenty things.

I went for wow over quantity. They also got books, board games, etc.

They will have wonderful memories of the gift that wows them over the bundle they won't recall in a weeks time.

I think 20 is too much going by our previous years. The kids got bored and I didn't even give them 20 maybe 15.
This year my 5yr old and 3yr old will get around 10 things each.

20 each plus stocking is far too much in my opinion. Really overwhelming for little kids too. I usually aim to get DD 1 'big' thing, 2 'medium' things and three smaller things, plus stocking.

Four or five. Stockings were little nothings. With four kids between us, us, and GPs there was plenty under the tree.

I’m a big pile person, I love filling under the tree. Mine have never got overwhelmed. Not everything gets played with straight away, I wouldn’t expect them to be. Each childs presents get put into a sack as I’m tidying the paper up so my DDs can come and go as they please. Some might not be touched for ages but eventually they will even if it’s six months down the line.

This year they have less than previous years, the most any of mine have is 13 but I will add to that as I won’t be able to stop myself. We don’t do stockings, we have them but just either fill them with chocolate or small presents that fit in them.

10-ish, usually one main one, two or three decent and the rest little extras. That number for everyone in the house makes a good pile under the tree.

I don't usually add them all up, but they have a good amount and I make sure they have an equal number. Only we and my parents buy for them so it's not like they get anything else.

Mine have probably 10 each but some are small presents.

20 is a good number. A decent pile plus within that you have a variety of types of thing. Mine tend to get 20-30 - most from Father Christmas but some from us. Plus a main gift. They don’t get overwhelmed, they get excited. As a pp said, they don’t have to play with everything straight away. That’s what the days between Christmas and new years are for. They’re only young once - let them enjoy it. 5 presents is okay if that’s all you can actually afford.

Another vote for 10 plus stockings although some of those 10 are what I would consider small things, like a book, or an akedo figure.

Between us and Santa, my daughter probably has around that, potentailly a few more. She opens then throughout the day. Never been overwhelmed and excited by each and every one.

If that is not for you then fine but I think it is rude to shame other people. Personally I think the whole 'need, read, wear, want' thing is boring for kids but that is only my opinion and I would never criticise someone for doing it!

Depends on how many other people get them presents! If you get them 20, and each set of grandparents get them 4 or 5, plus 5 aunts/uncles plus three god parents, plus friends... thats a lot more OTT than its just you buying 20 presents.

We only get ours 2 or 3 plus stocking but we have the massive family scenario.

DD8 will have about 4 pressies from us under the tree, we focus on quality over quantity and about 12 gifts in her stocking from FC. She'll get a couple more from relatives/friends that she will open on the day. That's more than enough I think for a magical Christmas without encouraging over consumerism and having her overwhelmed.

Had a Quick Look at google photos as I honestly couldn’t think and can’t say I count them! But roughly 20 plus a stocking (which is an actual long sock not a pillow case thing!). Not sure what people mean by “brains not being able to cope” or “being overwhelmed” etc… there is no pressure to open everything at one time and I’d say some little ones are generally a bit overwhelmed with the whole day rather than the presents specifically. One year when my youngest ds was about 3 he took til new year to open everything as he wanted to play with things when he opened them and that was fine. No issue.
Some of my presents for the kids will be practical things like new socks or things that if they needed them through the year wouldn’t be seen as presents… not everything is expensive. And I wouldn’t count them so piles will roughly look similar but they wouldn’t have the same number as that’s just weird. Each child has their own wrapping paper, though not such an issue as it was when there were all 4 still at home (two are now adults and no longer live here).

Dd gets a stocking and 1 or 2 main presents(depending what it is). However, our stocking is small gifts rather than all tiny stocking fillers. It tends to have things like books, stationery, craft set, new undies and vests, lol doll, polly pocket or similar, bath bombs, hair things etc. We say this is all from Father Christmas.

I set out starting to do this but, are these just the gifts from you or do FC gifts follow this rule? How does the stocking fit in? What about gifts from family, do you share out that list and that's it?

I never feel like I get it quite right.

Edited as I didn't answer the OP's question. We tend to do a stocking from FC which might have up to 10 things in (stockings are about 30cm long so depends on the size of the gifts as to how many there are) which will include a satsuma etc Then we buy them 4 or 5 gifts on top. When you add family gifts (who usually deliver them before the big day so they're under the tree) it's definitely going to get to 20ish. I agree with a pp though that it can be overwhelming (mine are currently 5&3). Other than the FC gifts which obviously arrive at a very specific time we've been known to open a Christmas present any time from mid Dec to early Jan. Open one, play with it, enjoy it, write the thank you card and open another a day or two later. Has really made the whole period feel magical for us.

A very full stocking and about 5 gifts each. The total cost will vary massively year on year. This year looks a lot more expensive than some. I wpuld rather get them a few things they really want than lots of stuff. They’re is lot of research into how having too many toys isn’t good for young children’s development. Having said that we have a very full playroom, outside area and bedrooms over flowing with toys and crafts.

From us, they get about 5 or 6 things plus a stocking with about 10 little (although not always cheap) things in. But then they have another 6 or so things from wider family. It always feels A LOT. I love buying them things but when we are sitting around the tree taking turns to open a gift and it feels like we're there for hours and becomes a bit boring. I'd like to cut it down further to be honest...but by MN standards we don't buy loads.

…and as for the Rhyme thing which I only ever see here and have never ever in 27 years of parenting seen anyone actually suggest irl… why would you get something someone NEEDS for Christmas? If they need it surely you’d just get it whenever…? Presents are meant to be fun!!! And treats! And special! Not following some sensible recommendations 🤦🏻‍♀️

The 'need' gifts are hobby-related things in our house. We're not talking school shoes.

To me, this is quite a boring list of things for a small child, though I accept everyone is different. Certainly when I was a child I would have been very disappointed by just getting this, especially the clothes and the book! (And I ended up reading English at Oxford - I am not some sort of book-hating philistine, but when I was a small child I wanted toys, not books and clothes).

Each to their own though. If your kids love getting this and have a marvellous, magical time opening it then fair play to you!

OP, I have never counted but I'd say I get my daughter about 20 things probably, but as I don't do a stocking, some of these would be little things like pin badges or sweets or novelty socks, while some is the bigger stuff. Not so much toys now she is 12, though there is the odd plushy in there..... But I loved it when she was young enough for 12. I see no reason not to indulge them a little at Xmas - it's one day a year. I'd buy her more if I could afford it, she could have whatever she wanted - she is a fantastically behaved, incredibly hard working, kind young woman who cares about others and is the light of my life.

Honestly for me there is no greater gift than one which fulfils a need. You've taken a chore off my list, bought something useful, made my life easier in someway. It's like the ultimate way to be considerate. I get a little glow of appreciation all over again every time I use it. I've been known to be using an item and text the person who gave it to me a thank you even though it might be something they bought years ago.

Goes to show we're all different huh!!

My kids are adults and I still don’t know how much is too much or too little. What do most people do in this situation? Mine are all living independently but are are struggling a lot financially.

We do the rhyme, something they want, they need , to wear, and to read. Then they get each other a gift in a mini sibling secret santa. So 5 or 6 six presents wrapped under the tree.

They get gifts off family, who always ask for ideas, so the list they write just gets shared. Saves us buying it all, then family just buying crap for the sake of giving a present.