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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

American Christmas

168 replies

RedHelenB · 17/12/2023 06:11

Just curious to know whether the naff Christmas movies are at all like the experience over there. Do you bake Christmas cookies and deliver to neighbours? Do you have candy cane lanes?

OP posts:
watermelonsugar56 · 19/12/2023 08:31

This thread has been really interesting.

EtiennePalmiere · 19/12/2023 09:03

My understanding is that boxing day was the day aristocrats gave presents to their servants. Nothing to do with religion or time off work.

Nonentity2023 · 19/12/2023 10:43

Christmas Day itself only became a public holiday in Scotland in 1958 because of changes at the time of the Reformation. Prior to this my family, being of Irish Catholic background, took the day off either unpaid or from their annual leave. I’m sure others did the same.

DC1888 · 19/12/2023 11:49

A follow on from Puritan influence and their religious strait-jacket that has impacted every facet of the US for centuries, an influence that was stamped out in the UK (England) in 1660 before it could take hold....an article in today's Telegraph on Christmas music:

‘They have no sense of irony’: why the US and the UK can never agree about Christmas songs.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/christmas/2023/12/18/why-the-us-and-the-uk-can-never-agree-about-christmas-songs/

Paragraph from it:

“It’s religion versus music hall,” is the blunt assessment of Simon Bates, the former Radio 1 DJ and current presenter on Boom Radio. “Americans are earnest, desperately religious and lack a sense of humour. We, on the other hand, are a Rabelaisian lot. We take our religion in small packets and we appreciate it if we do, but fundamentally we’re music hall fans. We like panto. Panto has failed miserably in America. Every ten years they try it, and it’s always a catastrophe. They have no sense of irony and can’t say ‘It’s behind you!’”
Bates lived in America in the late-1960s and “had a great time but, boy, were they straight”. He puts the cultural difference down to Americans’ fear of shedding their inhibitions and their inability to “switch off”.

The influence of religious extremism knows no bounds.

I could be construed as being harsh on this, but being Irish I've seen up close what the abuse of religion does to people (our own government in Northern Ireland is currently being prevented from functioning by the DUP, a Christian fundamentalist group of loonies) hence my critique of it and the extremist form that has influenced the US for centuries. The lack of tolerance and the bigotry and backwardness fundamentalism exudes impacts everyday life.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/christmas/2023/12/18/why-the-us-and-the-uk-can-never-agree-about-christmas-songs

knitnerd90 · 19/12/2023 12:53

Americans do like sentimental Christmas music but I dare say it's terribly tired and self satisfied to trot out the "Americans have no sense of humour or irony" shtick. The late 1960s was over 50 years ago for goodness' sakes.

As for "desperately religious" and all that tripe the classic American schmaltzy Christmas/holiday songs were written by Jews like Irving Berlin and Jule Styne! White Christmas, Let It Snow, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Winter Wonderland... all written by Jews and we all think it's a terrific joke. Religious carols are another matter.

Americans don't get panto, it's true but I think that is the sort of thing that has to be built into the culture. Half the reason Britain still likes them is tradition.

The Puritans were only ever dominant in the Massachusetts Bay colony; the other colonies were founded by different groups. In the Northeast the largest single denomination is Catholic. The various evangelical Protestant groups that now dominate the South particularly are not descended from the Puritans at all except very very indirectly through the various Great Awakenings. (American religious history is actually quite fascinating.)

SpuytenDuyvil · 19/12/2023 20:37

@DC1888 Your analyses over the last few days have been so interesting.

bert3400 · 19/12/2023 23:19

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 19/12/2023 02:32

As someone in the US has already said some people take holidays at this time of year - just as you are doing.

What is done in the UK on December 26th which makes it such a continuation of the Christmas celebrations btw? You are just joining in with the general US bashing which many Brits seem to delight in - quite oblivious to the fact that many of us who don't live there often have wtf?? moments when we read about some strange way Brits have of doing things, but are too polite to mention on here.

You seem very defensive, all I mentioned, was when I lived in the US, that not having Boxing Day was weird, especially as in the US there is a massive build up to Christmas and then it's over in a day, I'm not bashing anyone just an observation, but obviously no one is allowed to say anything slightly negative about the good old United States 🤔....btw I'm not British but Irish ....🍀

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 20/12/2023 01:04

bert3400 · 19/12/2023 23:19

You seem very defensive, all I mentioned, was when I lived in the US, that not having Boxing Day was weird, especially as in the US there is a massive build up to Christmas and then it's over in a day, I'm not bashing anyone just an observation, but obviously no one is allowed to say anything slightly negative about the good old United States 🤔....btw I'm not British but Irish ....🍀

I'm not defensive, and I don't even live in the US, but you literally said you were shocked that everyone went back to work on the 26th. I'm struggling to understand what is so odd about it being over in one day, as opposed to two days? Many people here in retail also return to work on Boxing Day, even though it is officially a public holiday, for the Boxing Day sales, and I suspect they do in the UK also.

Honeychickpea · 20/12/2023 01:44

bert3400 · 19/12/2023 23:19

You seem very defensive, all I mentioned, was when I lived in the US, that not having Boxing Day was weird, especially as in the US there is a massive build up to Christmas and then it's over in a day, I'm not bashing anyone just an observation, but obviously no one is allowed to say anything slightly negative about the good old United States 🤔....btw I'm not British but Irish ....🍀

Interesting. I have found that the build up starts earlier in Ireland and the UK than it does in the US. The hysterical food buying doesn't happen in the US either, in general. If you choose to take more time off you are free to do so. I and one other will be the only ones on my team working between 12/24 and 1/1 - the others are taking the week off from their PTO. To each their own.

OhcantthInkofaname · 20/12/2023 02:32

Rotisserie chickens for the main meat, charcuterie boards (one sweet and one savory), augratin potatoes, brown sugar dill carrots, artisan breads, for dessert: (what you call pudding) pistachio fluff, cranberry brownies. Always plates of cookies abound.,

mathanxiety · 20/12/2023 04:17

RedHelenB · 18/12/2023 06:14

But Anerica is more Christian so you'd assume they'd have that off I suppose

Why?

Separation of church and state makes the Christmas public holiday (and Good Friday) something of an anomaly.

The elementary and high school districts in my area recently added the major Jewish holidays to the list of days off. The Christmas break is called Winter Break here. Spring Break sometimes coincides with Easter and sometimes doesn't. Many businesses and school districts get Good Friday off. New Year's Day is a public holiday and also a holy day of obligation in RC dioceses. That's coincidental though.

Most RC parishes have a special Mass on Thanksgiving morning - in my parish this Mass features a food collection for a food bank run by a sister parish in a nearby deprived area.

Separation of church and state is a major, fundamental element of American public life.

mathanxiety · 20/12/2023 04:57

DC1888 · 18/12/2023 04:43

One more more thing (the list of acts they invoke God for is endless)

Manifest destiny (phrase coined in 1845)... the "design of Providence". The concept that whites were destined by God (the Christian one obvs) to expand the US from coast to coast, meaning the ethnic cleansing of the Natives from their land in the process. With 'God on your side' you can do no wrong. "God bless merica"

And according to Harry Truman and the other evangelical Christians there, interracial marriage violated biblical teaching (per the link).

So to reiterate the answer to the question, and the answer is a broad one, Christmas, being banned by the Puritans, an extremist, persecuting cult, has a much lower profile in the US than the UK as the stranglehold of the Puritans' influence has lasted centuries in the US, with this religious fervour affecting every aspect of society.

https://christianscholars.com/almighty-god-created-the-races-christianity-marriage-american-law/

That's not accurate.

America has a population composed of a wide variety of religious traditions and ethnic origins, including many who are not Christian at all.

In public schools across the land, Winter Break is coming up. No Nativity pageants will be performed this week in these schools. No Manger scenes will decorate classrooms. No religious carols will be sung in music class or by choirs or performed by bands or orchestras. Children may learn about seasonal celebrations (Hanukkah, Diwali, Christmas, Kwanzaa, etc) in social studies classes. There will be no assemblies where prayers of any kind will be spoken or sung. The marking of the season will be entirely secular. In workplaces across the land, people will wish their colleagues "Happy Holidays" - playing it safe because not everyone by a long shot celebrates that particular winter holiday.

Christmas (and all other religious observance) tends to be a domestic celebration as a result. Families that wish to give their children a religious education either send them to a church school (fee paying) or to Sunday school, Hebrew school, Islamic Foundation Sunday School, or CCE (RC), etc, on weekends or week nights, and of course take them to church or temple or mosque.

Religious engagement is not something children passively absorb in schools unless they are sent to a church run school. Parents have to go out of their way to provide a religious education for their children if they attend public schools.

So the approach to Christmas is low-key on the whole, though children of all religious backgrounds and none get caught up in the excitement of Santa Claus and the material aspect of the season. However, as mentioned on this thread (possibly on another thread), children are rarely asked what Santa is bringing them - it's considered a no-no to emphasise the material aspect of the holiday. There really isn't any of the "must have" toy of the year business in the US on the whole, and kids don't go back to school in January and brag to their classmates about whatever Santa brought. In many respects, the Shaker impulse in the culture has endured long after the Shakers themselves disappeared.

SweatpantPotato · 20/12/2023 05:01

The traditions very much depend on the family and to some extent the area where you live.

Our neighborhood has mostly decorated houses (lights and lawn decor) and most people have a tree visible in the window. Loads of baked goods, cookies and others, homemade and not, especially shared at work. Very common in my workplace and my husband's to exchange gifts. I got gifts for my boss, my colleagues and my direct reports. Lovely gifts too! Depending on the family Christmas eve or Christmas day will have a fancier meal. There isn't really a set traditional meal, though lots of people do turkey/ham/beef and sides. An elaborate Christmas brunch is not uncommon, it's what my family does, and for us Christmas dinner is more casual. In our house, a stocking for everyone even the pets, we don't do token gifts though, people fill them with nice stuff! We don't do a lot of presents for grownups outside the stockings. We listen to Christmas music and watch a lot of Christmas movies (the snowman. The grinch. Diehard etc.) We often go see the nutcracker live, the local ballet company put on an amazing production. Oftentimes attraction places like the zoo, botanic gardens etc will do amazing lights. It's a very merry time for me, though not all families celebrate to this extent!

WatchOutMissMarpleIsAbout · 20/12/2023 06:13

Such an interesting thread. Mind you the thought of having to bake cookies would give me anxiety 😁 I am not a baker!

schnubbins · 20/12/2023 07:47

I'm Irish and lived in California for 6 years when my kids were small .I must say I absolutely loved Thanksgiving when was there .We used to get together with friends ( other expats from differing European countries) and all our kids and have a fabulous meal of turkey and all the trimmings . The group got together in a different house and celebrated Christmas Day together usually with a large piece of beef .It was rather a shock when everyone went back to business as usual on the 26th. The mad rush to the shops again really baffled me! I never had a stocking in Ireland as a child and neither have my kids .We live in Germany though and it isn't a thing here either even though Christmas is very traditional here.

Citygirlrurallife · 20/12/2023 08:03

We came back from 10years in California last summer and I really miss candy cane lanes (whole streets where the residents commit to covering their houses with lights and decorations - some even give out hot chocolate etc for charity, we used to do the rounds of several neighbourhoods!), cookie exchanges (just an excuse to bake and then have a party that involved more cookies), going to Walt Disney concert hall for the Christmas singalong, Christmas tree lots on every major intersection, the influence specifically of Mexican food, music and traditions (I REALLY miss my neighbour’s Christmas tamales!), parades all over the place

I disagree it’s not a big deal - I loved that the holiday season basically starts in October with the lead up to Halloween then on the 1st November everything is about Thanksgiving and then from 1st December it’s all about Christmas. The “holidays” in the US are awesome. Mind you it was also very unpressured for us as expats as we had no expectations to travel across the country to see family

Citygirlrurallife · 20/12/2023 08:04

Also I would say the kids we knew all had Santa sacks and mine had little traditional British stockings!

Honeychickpea · 20/12/2023 08:26

WatchOutMissMarpleIsAbout · 20/12/2023 06:13

Such an interesting thread. Mind you the thought of having to bake cookies would give me anxiety 😁 I am not a baker!

Nobody has to make cookies. They do it if they choose to, and participate in cookie swaps if they choose to do so.

WatchOutMissMarpleIsAbout · 20/12/2023 10:11

😁

bert3400 · 20/12/2023 10:56

schnubbins · 20/12/2023 07:47

I'm Irish and lived in California for 6 years when my kids were small .I must say I absolutely loved Thanksgiving when was there .We used to get together with friends ( other expats from differing European countries) and all our kids and have a fabulous meal of turkey and all the trimmings . The group got together in a different house and celebrated Christmas Day together usually with a large piece of beef .It was rather a shock when everyone went back to business as usual on the 26th. The mad rush to the shops again really baffled me! I never had a stocking in Ireland as a child and neither have my kids .We live in Germany though and it isn't a thing here either even though Christmas is very traditional here.

Yes completely agree, with all the build up to Christmas and boom back to normal in a day. It was such a an anticlimax 😁

StuckintheUSA · 20/12/2023 14:40

Pallisers · 18/12/2023 03:31

Crackers are everywhere in the northeast the past few years. Advent calendars too.

When I had my cuban-american sister in law, her brother, his spouse and their children (live in Florida) for thanksgiving dinner one year I made a cuban chicken and rice dish as well as the usual turkey. She said "oh thank you, the kids were anxiously asking "but will there be rice?" much the way my kids would have asked about potatoes.

But most important! @StuckintheUSA are there really M&S things in Target?? Like food or just housewares? I find M&S has gone downhill a bit but I still do miss their food. 20 years ago my mother sent me a chicken tikka masala in the post - and I ate it!

Yes. But the selection isn't that great. Some tins of shortbread and Percy Pig type things. You can buy them online:

M&s Shortbread Biscuit Light Up House - 8.11oz : Target

M&S Shortbread Biscuit Light Up House - 8.11oz

Read reviews and buy M&S Shortbread Biscuit Light Up House - 8.11oz at Target. Choose from contactless Same Day Delivery, Drive Up and more.

https://www.target.com/p/m-38-s-shortbread-biscuit-light-up-house-8-11oz/-/A-89285268?ref=tgt_adv_xsp&AFID=google&fndsrc=tgtao&DFA=71700000109067729&CPNG=PLA_Snacks%2BCandy%2BShopping_Traffic_Local_Traffic%7CSnacks%2BCandy_Ecomm_Food_Bev&adgroup=SC_Snacks%2BCandy&LID=700000001170770pgs&LNM=PRODUCT_GROUP&network=g&device=c&location=9008140&targetid=pla-650518421249&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAvoqsBhB9EiwA9XTWGT_wGdZTjynhXbzi9koRwLqWBZVsKm9ESeu9T3yar9UDc7L5hffQ2BoCEpoQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

2023maine · 20/12/2023 17:38

Hey there! I enjoyed reading through the pages of how we all celebrate Christmas differently and I didn't quite find any that resembled how my family celebrates the holiday season in Aroostook County, Maine, USA. Growing up, my family did not go to church. I suppose we would identify as Christians but religion wasn't a large part of our lives. My family is Native American on my dads side and French and Irish on my mothers side.

Thanksgiving was never really too much of a big deal in my house. In school we would make lots of thanksgiving crafts and table decor (hand turkeys, native babies, feather headbands and puritan hats, etc. The day of Thanksgiving, my brother and I get up and turn the Macy's parade on and watch all the big floats. My moms side would all get together for the big thanksgiving meal, my dad's side did not. So basically we'd have a light breakfast and then around 4pm all gather at my grandmother's or aunts for Thanksgiving dinner. We'd always have turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, peas, squash, sweet potato, rolls, stuffing (always as a side dish and never in the bird), cranberry sauce, and usually a kid friendly side like mac and cheese. Then for dessert we'd have homemade vanilla ice cream and hot fudge sauce. Then the kids would either go sledding outside if there was snow, or stay inside and play board games and super nintendo. (There wasn't many of us - 5 total) Now as a mom, we gather at my husbands grandmother's house (she does things different, hers is like an all day buffet so we stop in when we can) and then go to my mom's house for supper. Mom still makes the traditional meal, my parents are now divorced and my brother lives 2 hours upstate and has a family of his own so typically they don't come down. My dad remarried and his wife and him will usually serve to less fortunate people at his church.

Then that evening, black friday sales started at midnight. My parents always did black friday shopping. My brother, cousins, and I would always have our lists made by thanksgiving from the sale fliers that went out in the mail for each store. Black Friday shopping is really big here. But in recent years, it's changed quite a bit (and when I worked in retail I was so thankful for the state of Maine and the laws that protected retail workers.) It used to get really wild, people getting trampled, lots of theft, etc. (Google black friday tickle me elmo if you want to see just how nuts people would get!!) Today, Black Friday here in Maine consists of stores being open from 5 or 6 am to 11pm. I'm not sure what other states do. However, people still line up hours before the doors open and then rush in like heathens to get the best deals that are to be found.
I do not Black Friday shop in person. No deal is worth that IMO. I typically will start online shopping that day though and watch the prices through til Cyber Monday. The next day, Saturday (the day after black friday) our town has a large light parade and the downtown area gets christmas lights. Santa Claus is set up in the town square and kids can visit with him. Saturday is small business sales day and all of the locally owned shops (we have several giftshops, a movie theatre, restaurants, an arcade, pet shop, and toyshop, etc) all do really fun deals and there's a lot of emphasis on shopping local.

So in a nutshell Thanksgiving is the kick off to our holiday season. In my house we put our (fake) xmas tree up and decorate with lights outside the house. When I was younger, my parents would take us to go to a Christmas tree farm and cut down our tree. We'd bundle up in our snow gear and find the best tree. Then load it in the truck and drive back home with it. We still have several xmastree farms around, but my kids and husband are allergic to real trees so we opt for the fake tree.

The month of December my family buys nothing but essentials and most anything extra plus whatever we have saved goes toward Christmas and heating costs. You need new shoes? gotta wait til xmas. haha. In my family ( husband, myself, and our 2 kids, daughter age 15 and a son age 12) the kids do not believe in Santa anymore but my husband and I had different santa traditions growing up. My hubs only received one thing from Santa and it was always unwrapped and put together ready to be used and in my house Christmas was basically everything from Santa and an extreme amount of gifts, all wrapped. We both got stockings, but mine were all wrapped and his never were. We both would leave milk and cookies out for Santa. We try to meet in the middle. We used to set a number of gifts per child, usually around 15-20 each. But as they have gotten older we had to set a $ budget. My kids typically get fun stuff only on Christmas and their birthdays, and then clothing is usually only bought during back to school shopping and summer vacation shopping.
The week leading up to xmas I'll put presents under the tree as I wrap them, but I still like to surprise them with their stockings and a few bigger wrapped presents on xmas morning. So my husbands and I's compromise was that in our family's home, Santa would bring the stockings and five presents per child and we've really kept to that even as they have gotten older. We don't wrap things like sleds, or new winter jackets, or bigger items since Santa can do whatever santa wants to do. :) My husband and I don't do gifts for each other, we wait until our income tax comes in February and buy all the things for each other! It's so much more fun to focus on the kids. Our families do the same, gifts are really only for the kids unless agreed upon beforehand. My mom and I usually do something like a necklace or perfume for each other.

I really think if you have made it this far, the most AMERICAN thing is blending traditions such as we do and our parents did, and sometimes even creating new traditions. We do quietly acknowledge that xmas is actually a holiday because of the birth of Jesus, but we are not religious and leave the nativity scene out of our own family's christmas celebration. We do have lots of friends that go to church, but we have like 25 christian churches in my town including, catholic, methodist, pentecost, universalist, Unitarian, salvation army, baptists, latter day saints, jehovah's witness, church of good shepherd, church of christ, and Mormons, and many others im sure im forgettting. They all do Christmas a little differently. So each of my friends and their own families do things a bit dif than mine.
My husband typically gets xmas eve, christmas and the following day off at his job (he works in a mill) and since I work in a public school, the kids and I get out of school this friday and do not return back until Jan 2. (We also get a school vacay in November - usually we go up until tuesday thanksgiving week and then are off until the beginning of the next week (so like 5 days or so) and then more week long breaks in Feb, and again in April)

Oh! I left out the school stuff! So at the public school I work at, the little kids have a holiday concert, the Chorus class goes caroling around the nursing homes (we have a large elderly population here) and they really enjoy that. We have a high school play put on by the drama department (such as Elf, disney's hs musical, willy wonka).
We have pj day, a door decorating contest, and BASKETBALL. so much basketball. High school Basketball is huge here. It's a community event. Each town have their own teams and the communities get really competitive. Our schools guidance department has year long fundraiser to buy presents for kids that otherwise wouldn't get them due to income. When we come back from winter break we have winter carnival which is a week long celebration at the hs level where the grades compete to see who is the best class (we do sports, games, quizzes, lots of competitions) Its a lot of fun. We don't do midterms (testing) in this school district because it was too stressful on the kids in years past, though other surrounding schools might still im not sure.

ok I think thats all.
Happy Holidays to everyone!

EtiennePalmiere · 20/12/2023 17:53

Are these long comments chatgpt ?

2023maine · 20/12/2023 18:10

haha okay, so mine wasn't chat gpt. I just had an 80 min free period and literally am just trying to get through the work day. All my work is done so now Im clearly writing novels about weird Maine stuff.

2023maine · 20/12/2023 18:14

Chatgpt would never typo quite like me. Sorry for all them.😐 I'm tellin ya, I'm checked out. I just want to go home and wrap gifts and throw on pjs and start getting my Christmas sprit on