What’s downs MN have a against a pile/sack of presents?

[Whodhaveem]

This isn’t necessarily about how much everyone spends on their children, I think we all realise that everyone has different budgets but what does MN have against a present piles/sack

Traditionally Santa/Father Christmas is always shown with a sack or presents for the children, sometimes he empties the contents under the free, or leaves just as it is with the the different shapes of gifts being seen through the material and the crinkly mismatched wrapping paper popping out of the top…

As a parent what’s in the sack has varied through the years depending on what our budget was, there have been years when it’s content hasn’t exceeded £35 and others when when we have been able to spend much more regardless for our children the contents aren’t the most important bit, the apprehension and magic of Santa’s full sack which has came from the North Pole and is full of surprise’s is.

It just seems to me that people like to pick apart this tradition like it’s nonsense and showy but really it’s sticking to the narrative of every movie, Christmas card or image that we know of the magical man in red…

Im interested in everyone’s take of this, is have a pile/sack/bundle of presents really that bizarre?

Isn't Santa's sack meant to hold presents for every child in the world, not one per household?

I don't know really but I would just add it to the list if other things about Christmas MN hates...

Buying new - buy everything 2nd hand or ideally grow it organically

Putting your tree up before the 20th (especially if you then leave it up past the 27th! Gasp)

Caring what your wrapping paper looks like

Having a colour scheme for your tree, it should be decorated with homemade shite only that must not match!

Enjoying buying presents - far better to just give everyone you know a voucher, or do a secret santa so you reduce the having to give a shitness even further

Christmas lights - blue are tacky, coloured are tacky, white are boring...

Most films depict Santa with a big sack, but normally one gift per child… Christmas Chronicles, Arthur Christmas?

I think? makes no difference to me, I love to see and hear all the different ways people celebrate.

I think the issue with piles of presents is that it is usually a load of cheap crap from b&m, the range or similar. Often just for show/Instagram rather than thoughtfully chosen presents that the children will love and get use from.

I bet Christmas is a barrel of laughs in your house.

@wutheringkites Hmm, i guess it’s still a take of the same tradition.

I love the Polar Express but I could never understand the huge Santa sack which probably did have something for every child, in it, it just didn’t fit my version of what I have always believed to be true that each house/child has their individual save (though in our house a pillow case and not to ne confused with a stocking)

And no OP it isn't weird to have/like a nice pile of presents. I have been known to wrap a small gift for mine in a cardboard box so his pile looks bigger. It's all part of the excitement.

My brother is in his 40s and still gets excited about a "box present" so do I for that matter, or one that looks like it could be a book!

Just realized you're talking about Mumsnetters, not you.

You get that this was about other people on mumsnet right?

Cross Post!

In our house FC brings a stocking and gift. The other gifts in his sack are for other kids.
The other gifts are from the person who bought it. I know that some households allow FC to get all the credit but that’s not how we do it.

I think it’s more the whole posting of said pile of presents on social media & the notion that the pile size is the most important thing?

And of course having more than 4 gifts, 2 of which the child doesn't want is vulgar etc.

Plus who says that people with a pile/sack haven't also carefully thought out every gift?

Mine always know that some gifts might be more exciting than others. Size doesn't always reflect the cost or how exciting they might be.

The problem is not all parents can afford to buy piles of presents. So if one child gets one gift from santa and another gets lots it seems cruel especially as kids know that santa gives gifts for being good. Will the child think that that means they're not as good as their friend?

Can easily be avoided by having just one present from Santa and the rest from the parents.

@WinchSparkle80 Absolutely, me too!

I have read 3 posts on here this morning about Christmas piles, two of which suggests those who say they do are exaggerating/lying and one saying that’s it’s all for show/social media…

Im just trying to understand how something that is so close to the Santa Clause tradition is considered so strange or unbelievable.

It's so awful that this is true 😔 read too many threads saying all these things. The Xmas spirit is not allowed on MN🤭

No, I don't think I've ever seen a picture or film of Santa leaving a sack of gifts. It's always a sack on his back, and then he takes out one or 2 to put under the tree or in a stocking. Then goes off with the sack to the next house.

I think the 'present piles' aversion is to those posts you see on SM of utterly ridiculous amounts of gifts - I'm talking taking up a whole wall / half the room - either completely unwrapped or 'done all my wrapping' posts and it's clearly not a 'yay, finished!' post, it's a 'look, I bought more than anyone else!' post.

To clarify, I mean like this:

Im just trying to understand how something that is so close to the Santa Clause tradition is considered so strange or unbelievable.

But the tradition isn’t about masses of presents, pretty much all Christmas films give the message that family & thinking of others etc is the true meaning.

Traditionally Santa/Father Christmas is always shown with a sack or presents

Yes, because he delivers presents to a lot of people! People can buy as many presents and spend as much on them as they like. It's the 'look at this massive haul' social media posts that are a bit crass.

The concept of the huge sack is gluttony and greedy.

Santa does a stocking with small stocking fillers gifts of fairly low value. Not big fuck off presents.

Santa does this for all children. He's pretty fair like that.

Parents do the large presents. If parents want to spoil their children rotten that's fine but only if they can afford to and then aren't defaulting on all their other bills.

The trouble is with parents and huge sacks is this drives expectations and comparisons over 'what Santa brought'.

Parents who buy mountains miss the point too. What's the point in giving a gift your kid won't even remember they've got because they've got so much other shit. The mountain of presents is either to satisfy parental guilt or to show off to others. It's not for the kids benefit. And it's just so wasteful.

It's about the quality of gifts not the quantity or value of gifts.

I buy through the year to spread the cost/stress but I've taken to doing it more to stop me buying for the sake of giving gifts and to make sure I get things people really want/need. I would like to stop giving gifts to adult relatives but this suggestion was ignored.

I'm not the Grinch. But I do object to competitive present giving. It misses the point.

@GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut just to clarify I do not base my children Christmas childhood memories and traditions on an
image that went viral in the Daily Mail a few years back 😜

More this kind of thing…

Well in my childhood that pile included satsumas, bags of walnuts, sparklers, homemade gingerbread, little tree-hanging chocolates- all seen as an intrinsic part of Christmas presents and accepted with joy. It's quite a bit different from the plastic, neurotoxic chemical-laden Chinese tat these days that makes up THE pile.

Parents who buy mountains miss the point too. What's the point in giving a gift your kid won't even remember they've got because they've got so much other shit. The mountain of presents is either to satisfy parental guilt or to show off to others. It's not for the kids benefit. And it's just so wasteful.

You are totally projecting there.

More volume does not equal less thought put into each individual gift.

More gifts does not equal shit (maybe it would in you house 🤷‍♀️)

I have no parental guilt and don't post anything on social media so you would be wrong there too

I’m slightly conservative with Xmas because I hate the landfill element of tonnes of shite being bought for the sake of gift piles I stopped that long ago. I also don’t do the Santa thing because my kids would find the concept unnerving and question the logic anyway. They’re instructed to play along in the company of other kids though. What we do do is buy a couple of really wanted, really special, sometimes expensive gifts. These are usually tech, or STEM gadgets, or instruments they’ve begged for. But iPhones, consoles and drum kits last for years and years. They’re a good investment. Dh and I don’t buy for each other, no bloody point, we just buy ourselves what we want all year anyway. Dad gets sent a bottle of scotch, siblings get sent the cash for houseplants or Bluetooth speakers or whatever ( they’re all ‘bought my first house’) age. People can say we’re boring, we don’t care. I’m not budging on my values and I don’t give a shite about Facebook likes either. They’d let me know if they didn’t like the way I do things. See also : German style meal, we go to a restaurant on Xmas eve and I treat everyone to a buffet meal and on Xmas day we just have party food and cheese boards because the Xmas dinner was a joke and waste of bloody time because hours in the kitchen wasn’t worth it with the ‘I only want a Yorkshire and a sausage’ ‘I only want carrots and potatoes’ ‘there’s a speck of gravy on this, I won’t eat it now’ ‘ ‘I can smell Brussels sprouts, I don’t want any dinner now’ 🤣
never again shall I cook anything resembling a Xmas dinner. Never. 🤣

@RedToothBrush

Im not sure why you have written your post like a news report, their are a lot of variables on peoples traditions and how they do presents/Santa….

As a child, and Santa to my own DC your way would have ruined my Christmas, nothing to do with expensive or performative parenting it just really sounds very non magical (obviously IMO)