Please do come and direct your ire at me, you tutting tutters. Then you can leave the people you know nothing about alone. Tough though it may be, even if you haven't bothered finding out what they actually do at Christmas, even if they're actually spending less than you and have a smaller carbon footprint, even if you feel very, very pleased with yourself about having told off complete strangers for something you perceive them to have done without a shred of evidence, hush. Come here. I'm going to frighten your little judgy minds.
I have THREE December 1st boxes. Count them. You'll need your judgy, pointy fingers to waggle, both of them and then the metaphorical stick you're using to beat people with to add to the judgy fingers. Now, count them. One. Two. Three!
Would you like to hear about them? There used to be one. It contained a couple of - now very old - Christmas books signed by my Victorian granny and my copy of The Night Before Christmas from 1981. It also has a blanket in it that has been crocheted by 5 generations of my family and we are still adding to it as the family expands. It comes out for the coldest month but somehow, somewhere along the line it started appearing on December 1st. Probably because my favourite thing about Christmas as a season is the bringing in of light and warmth and it seems to represent that quite well. There are mugs in there as well. A couple from the seventies bought by parents on their first Christmas as a married pair and then some that have huge amount of sentiment attached to them. There are some Victorian decorations (again belonging to my Granny once upon a time) along with the tissue they've been wrapped in for over 100yrs. There are letters in there from "Father Christmas", telling the DC about the year gone by and the things they have achieved. We re-read them on the day school breaks up and reminisce. A new one appears each year, even though they've long since stopped believing.
There are three boxes now because I collect vintage Christmas books. I have dozens of them. The boxes are wicker and those books are my pride and joy. We read them together, some of them are novels and we help ourselves to them and read alone from Dec 1st to Jan 6th and enjoy them like the old friends they are. The baskets are lined with a patchwork velvet I made years ago and they are part of my decorations. They sit by the fire, open, for people to help themselves. There are a couple of jigsaw puzzles in there as well and handwritten recipes I've collected over the years. I add new stuff to it as well: an advent candle; a card/paper advent calendar; sometimes tickets to a festive show or panto coming up in December.
I know what you'll say. Well we don't mean that sort of stuff. We mean rampant consumerism and pressure on families and grabby mcgrabby behaviours. The thing is, the smug, arms folded "well I don't do that grabby shit because I'm not a consumerist twat" started without even a hint or a sniff of what people actually do on December 1st. And largely, isn't in pyjamas, books and bedding that comes out year after year? With an advent calendar added on top? And was there evidence that those people who have a 2013 duvet they've used every year for 5 weeks are spending more than people who don't have a Dec 1st box but have been on 3 foreign holidays this year and spent 6 times as much on presents for the actual day?
Look, I hate the way some things are going. The planet is burning. Shops are raking in profits and selling so much stuff we don't need. It's abysmal. I get it. I'm on board. But that isn't necessarily what is happening here. And even if it is - and I acknowledge that yes of course there must be people out there pushed into buying stuff we don't need and it is a waste of resources - but is this really how we challenge it? In a divided world where we need to instil communication and care, is alienating people the answer? Why not ask what people do on Dec 1st and actually, listen. I'm willing to bet the bottom line is trying to bring joy at the darkest time of year. Maybe we could talk about how we do that and share ideas that are about tradition and family and the real stuff that we need as a society. Maybe we could recommend the books we like to share in December and the recipes we use and the activities which make us smile and laugh most and that can be the conversation rather than spitting hate and wilful misunderstandings.
And I know I sound a sanctimonious twat. I'm ill and tired and deal with adolescents all day who are increasingly angry at the world. I clicked on this whilst feeling a bit miserable and a lot sentimental. But do we really need to be rude to swathes of people without listening to them first?