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Christmas

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Original poster

DS changing his mind!

52 replies

Noimaginationforaun · 20/12/2022 09:25

Hi! Looking for some help from some much more experienced mums!

Our 3.5 DS has suddenly started talking about Father Christmas bringing him a car he can ride in? He only asked for chocolate when he wrote his list! We have bought all his presents and there is definitely not a car he can ride in in the mix!

What do I say? We keep telling him well Father Christmas has already sorted all the presents, he didn’t ask for it in his letter so he didn’t know, maybe he can ask for his birthday.

I don’t want him to be sad on Christmas Day! For context, DS is adopted and this will be his second Christmas with us. Last year, we kept it really low key as he had a lot of fear about the presents being taken away etc due to past experiences. We are obviously very happy he’s settled so well and now has no such worries about presents being taken away but we don’t want him to be disappointed!

OP posts:
OtterInABox · 20/12/2022 09:32

Can't you pick him a ride on car in Argos or via Amazon? Seems quite straightforward

Justhereforthechristmasthreads · 20/12/2022 09:33

Have a look on facebook marketplace near you and see if there is a cheap one you can pick up?

upfucked · 20/12/2022 09:35

He won’t be sad. Remind him the list to Santa is only a suggestion and you don’t get everything you ask for.

Theunamedcat · 20/12/2022 09:36

Yeah I would grab him a cheap one from somewhere and next year give him a first week of December cut off

Original poster
Noimaginationforaun · 20/12/2022 09:39

Unfortunately, it’s not possible to buy him the ride in car. He’s talking about those electric ones you sit in and ride and we don’t have the budget or the space!

OP posts:
LemonsAndCherries · 20/12/2022 09:41

For this year, I'd try to get one if you can afford it without getting into debt.

He's still so little to understand timing and how close to Christmas we are etc. Then, throw in the adoption side too and wanting him to have a lovely Christmas where he trusts he'll get and keep his presents, I'd definitely do it. Next year he'll be older and you can set some dates for requests.

Have a wonderful Christmas with your son!

treesandweeds · 20/12/2022 09:42

You need to dissuade a child straight away when they start talking about a present that they won't get. Top tip!!

hiredandsqueak · 20/12/2022 09:46

I'd put away some of his gifts for his birthday and buy a cosy coupe car for Christmas. They are a huge hit with all children and he won't care that he has to move it himself. It can live in the garden shed once Christmas is over.

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 20/12/2022 09:50

Noimaginationforaun · 20/12/2022 09:39

Unfortunately, it’s not possible to buy him the ride in car. He’s talking about those electric ones you sit in and ride and we don’t have the budget or the space!

I was never one for buying the children everything they asked for, especially things outside our budget. (DD asked for a real pony one year, was never going to happen).
I'd be setting expectations with your DS that it's not coming now. Something like 'Santa won't be bringing a ride on car this year, but he will be bringing you lots of other lovely things'. If he asks why, just say Santa already had the other presents ready before he knew you wanted the car.

You are going to have this for birthdays and Christmas for a long time, and you can't always 'just get one'.

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 20/12/2022 09:50

Don't worry op. My son is doing this too because they are obviously talking about it at nursery and what he hears other children say, he is now replicating.

On the actual morning, your son will be so happy and mystified he won't remember he didn't get a ride in car he will only be looking at what he did get.
Absolutely no need to buy anything else. Just keep talking about what Santa is bringing. In our case it's a bike and a tiger and so when Ds started talking about a toy kitchen (which he already has but he told me that can go to his younger brother and he will have a new one -em no!) I just said oh really? And maybe a bike and tiger too? He says yes. :) So I know he won't be disappointed and he has other stuff too

redtshirt50 · 20/12/2022 09:51

I agree with PP

Save some of the presents for his birthday, and then get him a car he can sit in and push along

he’ll be so excited that he got what he asked her he won’t notice it’s not exactly what he requested!

Ihaveamagicwand · 20/12/2022 09:52

I second the Cosy Coupe type but if finances are a concern then can you find one of the strong cardboard ‘build it yourself’ ones to tide him over to his birthday?

Beamur · 20/12/2022 09:52

He may not still have this in mind come Christmas Day so don't worry too much. Hopefully he'll love the gifts you have got him and forget about the car.
Top tip - unless you have reasons for doing Christmas a certain way, we did stockings only from Father Christmas and everything else was labelled who it was from. That way the stakes are lower for the expectations from Father Christmas! Last minute requests are easier to deal with then too. FC always brought a combination of useful things (like socks and underwear) some sweets and games/novelties. FC always seemed a bit ego centric to me as his gifts had a heavy lean towards featuring him and his entourage. (Christmas socks!!)
DD was quite an anxious child and was quite alarmed by the prospect of FC coming in our house. I'm glad we missed out on the Elf on the shelf craze too as I think that would have been immensely stressful for her.

Schnooze · 20/12/2022 10:07

Manage expectations now. Fc will have already looked at your list. He probably won’t have time for sorting stuff now.

RedHelenB · 20/12/2022 10:08

Been there got the t shirt. Christmas Eve was always a mad dash to get the one thing they really wanted but hadn't said. But their faces when they opened it was worth it. If you can afford it I'd get it, they're not little and believing in Father Christmas for long.

Voomvoom · 20/12/2022 10:11

No advice but solidarity. 3.5 yr old DD has just suddenly declared Santa is putting something she's never mentioned before in her stocking. Luckily it's cheap so if I can find one locally I'll pick it up but I'm afraid I'm not going out of the way to order it now.

Tempyname · 20/12/2022 10:19

It’s fine for kids not to get everything they want (healthy in my view). As you say, he could put it on his birthday list. If it’s something you can afford (def look at second hand - he won’t know) then that’s a bit different but it’s certainly not something essential or to get too stressed about.

Wiloswisp · 20/12/2022 10:23

Hobbycraft do a cardboard car for £20. Not quite what’s he’s asking for but affordable especially if you save some of the other gifts for his birthday.

LemonsAndCherries · 20/12/2022 10:24

Ooos sorry just seen your update.

How about a trip promising a day out where you can drive mini cars?

Marblessolveeverything · 20/12/2022 10:27

Is there a place that has ride on cars near you? Perhaps Santa heard the request a little late and made arrangements for him to go somewhere but wasn't able to sort car this year?…

PushingAnElephantUpTheStairs · 20/12/2022 10:30

People seem to be missing the bit where you said just getting one wasn't an option.

We have been in the same position - one year my DC (also 3 at the time) decided to change their mind and ask for a tuba!

We went down the line that although Santa can do/bring lots of things that parents can't, he never brings something that's not suitable for your household. We also bigged up the fact that he does sometimes bring surprises instead because he's good at guessing the things children like. That way you can make sure they know it won't be coming and build anticipation for what is.

Stressfordays · 20/12/2022 10:34

Mine do this every single year so prepare yourself for it. If its completely out of budget then I would try and distract etc. Maybe mention some of the surprise stuff you have bought him and try and steer him to wanting that, 3.5 is pretty easy to distract. I usually keep some budget back for last minute Xmas change of minds. Luckily this year for me they had pretty cheap requests last minute to santa 🤣

FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 20/12/2022 10:34

It's happened here, she didn't get the new addition to the list because it was too late but she forgot or didn't care once she saw everything she did have

PutinSmellsPassItOn · 20/12/2022 10:49

Keep an eyepit on Facebook market place and freegle.......People give those ride in cars away all the time on my local sites.

Sugarfree23 · 20/12/2022 10:55

What have you said so far? Sorry Santa can't bring electric things?

Personally I'd try and convince him a Cosie coupe or some sort of pedal car or go-kart is ace! And maybe return something that you have already bought.

I'm not a big fan of the electric cars, encourage kids to be lazy and they tend to go too slow to be exciting. So are a bit of a 5min wonder. You never see kids out in them in summer.