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Original poster

BIL’s GFs sister now coming for boxing day - gift

45 replies

Follycastle · 16/12/2022 11:02

So last night my DH’s brother (BIL) asked if his girlfriend’s sister can join us at a family get together I’m hosting at our house on Boxing Day. She is 17. I did ask whether she really wanted to come and wouldn’t prefer to stay home, but apparently she would like to join us all, which is fine. I don’t know the circumstances but know that the she is spending Christmas with my BIL, his GF and their two kids.

I barely know the GF never mind the sister (who I’ve never met).

Anyway, there will be family children ages 1-8 there and we are exchanging presents so I’m wondering if I should get the sister a small gift and if so, what? It’s a bit late in the day now but maybe just some chocolate? I don’t know her at all so no idea what else would be suitable.

OP posts:
Peabody25 · 16/12/2022 11:53

What about doing a stocking type thing with a small bottle of alcohol, sweets or chocolate, sheet face mask, fluffy socks, lip balm type of things?

55christmasmagic · 16/12/2022 12:00

I think I'd get a face mask and some chocolate!

mast0650 · 16/12/2022 12:13

To be honest, I don't think it would occur to me to get her a present. It is Boxing Day not Xmas day, you don't know her, she's not really a child, and you are doing a nice thing already by hosting her - she should be bringing you a small gift of eg chocolates/flowers, not the other way round!

But if you really feel she needs something, then chocolates is fine. Or bath stuff. Or given the weather right now, something like gloves or fluffy socks! Nothing bigger than that, certainly not a whole stocking!! I think that would potentially embarrass her.

MerryChristmasToYou · 16/12/2022 12:34

Box of chocolates would be enough.

ipreferthecat · 16/12/2022 12:35

I think what @Peabody25 says would be lovely

It would make her feel welcome and included

Mindymomo · 16/12/2022 12:36

I think that’s very nice of you to include the sister. We meet up with family Boxing Day and exchange gifts then and have had additional people come. Could you ask BIL what she likes.

mindutopia · 16/12/2022 12:40

I think that's really kind of you to welcome her. If she is spending Christmas with her sister and not her parents, I expect she probably is in need of a bit of kindness. Yes, I think it would be nice to get her a small present as otherwise she might feel left out. Why not ask BIL what she might like? I wouldn't assume all 17 year olds like alcohol, chocolates or face masks. Or maybe you could get her a small gift to complement something that BIL and GF are giving her on xmas.

yorkshirepudsx · 16/12/2022 12:46

Follycastle · 16/12/2022 11:02

So last night my DH’s brother (BIL) asked if his girlfriend’s sister can join us at a family get together I’m hosting at our house on Boxing Day. She is 17. I did ask whether she really wanted to come and wouldn’t prefer to stay home, but apparently she would like to join us all, which is fine. I don’t know the circumstances but know that the she is spending Christmas with my BIL, his GF and their two kids.

I barely know the GF never mind the sister (who I’ve never met).

Anyway, there will be family children ages 1-8 there and we are exchanging presents so I’m wondering if I should get the sister a small gift and if so, what? It’s a bit late in the day now but maybe just some chocolate? I don’t know her at all so no idea what else would be suitable.

A gift bag with a few goodies in? Maybe some face masks, bubble bath, bath bombs, etc, some Christmas socks and then hot chocolate & a Christmas mug?🙈 I've done this for family members I'll be seeing but I'm not so familiar with, just a few little bits in!

Also - new look have socks for like less than £2, B&M have Xmas mugs and the rest are fairly cheap in Tesco etc, so doesn't cost too much xx

TrashyPanda · 16/12/2022 12:49

If the only others getting pressies are 8 and under it might make her feel embarrassed to be lumped in with the kids.

TrashyPanda · 16/12/2022 12:50

Sorry, just realised I read the OP wrong!

yes, some socks, chocs etc would be lovely

Mrsjayy · 16/12/2022 12:52

55christmasmagic · 16/12/2022 12:00

I think I'd get a face mask and some chocolate!

Yeah this. Or maybe nip into boots or superdrug see what gifty things they have and just pick something..

Thefriendlyone · 16/12/2022 12:52

If you are buying all the adults a gift then yes. But if it’s only the kids up to 8 then goodness please don’t. She isn’t a young child.

Thefriendlyone · 16/12/2022 12:53

TrashyPanda · 16/12/2022 12:50

Sorry, just realised I read the OP wrong!

yes, some socks, chocs etc would be lovely

I’m confused too, I don’t understand why the op has listed the kids then, I took it the gifts were for the kids. Otherwise why not just say we are a;L exchanging gifts.

Sparkletastic · 16/12/2022 13:02

Thefriendlyone · 16/12/2022 12:52

If you are buying all the adults a gift then yes. But if it’s only the kids up to 8 then goodness please don’t. She isn’t a young child.

Spot on with this advice.

Blendandmix · 16/12/2022 13:02

My brother has a new girlfriend (less than a year) they're early 20s. I got her a make up bag, a cute anti bac hand thing cos she's works in a hospital and a little pair of earrings

Rewis · 16/12/2022 13:10

I'd give her cinema tickets (if here is cinema around) or giftcard to a chain restaurant. Or go to lush/bodyshop type thing with nice bodywash/shampoo etc.

I'm one of those uptight people who wouldn't buy alcohol to a 17 yo (especially a stranger). But chocolates are nice or a treat basket.

Soontobe60 · 16/12/2022 13:14

Just ask BILs girlfriend!!!

Unicorn2022 · 16/12/2022 13:16

I would either get her chocolates or they have Nivea gift sets half price in Tesco with lip gloss and toiletries really cheap - a couple of teens have asked me for those.

determinedtomakethiswork · 16/12/2022 13:19

Peabody25 · 16/12/2022 11:53

What about doing a stocking type thing with a small bottle of alcohol, sweets or chocolate, sheet face mask, fluffy socks, lip balm type of things?

She's only there for Boxing Day, not Christmas Day.

declutteringmymind · 16/12/2022 13:20

Chocolates, wine, candle, jar of bath salts, reed diffuser.

ChimChimeny · 16/12/2022 13:21

Rewis · 16/12/2022 13:10

I'd give her cinema tickets (if here is cinema around) or giftcard to a chain restaurant. Or go to lush/bodyshop type thing with nice bodywash/shampoo etc.

I'm one of those uptight people who wouldn't buy alcohol to a 17 yo (especially a stranger). But chocolates are nice or a treat basket.

Cinema tickets are about £10 a pop these days, I definitely wouldn't spend that much.
I'd get something like a box of chocolates for about £4 and some fluffy socks for £1/2, it looks nice but I wouldn't want to spend loads on someone I don't know.
Also, I agree that if you are only buying for DC then don't buy for her.

GinTonic123 · 16/12/2022 13:33

Bottle of Baileys?

MerryChristmasToYou · 16/12/2022 13:37

She's 17 so booze is out , @GinTonic123 .

GinTonic123 · 16/12/2022 13:38

Ok…

Folklore9074 · 16/12/2022 13:42

Id either go with something small ie scented candle/bath set or not bother. Nice to include her but I'm presuming that she will have had gifts over christmas as understand that she coming into another families celebration. You could be nice and get her a gift but also I probably worry to much and just be welcoming on the day.