ADHD & generally disorganised people Christmas thread

[falalalalalalalallama]

Fuck. Having utterly, predictably, run out of time to do everything I now have 2 days till we leave to go visit my family and the ILs (not back home till 2022) and I've totally lost track of who I've bought presents for, what I got and where I stashed them!

I know I need to get some more. Still need to do all the stocking fillers for the DC and haven't got anything - or any ideas - for some key family members - unless I bought something for them, hid it and forgot (very possible).

Also need to design and send a picture calendar of the DC to relatives who expect it, finish about a week's work in a day plus wash and pack all our clothes with the dryer on the blink.

But it's all doable, right?!!

How's your planning going?

Anyone fancy a ?!

@WorriedMillie

My people ADHD here, currently unmedicated and struggling! I veer between “it’s ok” and “fuck, it’s utter chaos”, I’m often overwhelmed and I envy people who are NT and able. Work is challenging at the moment too

DD’s presents are kind of done, but I’ve mislaid a couple (how?). Need to wrap them, this feels overwhelming
I need to sort out my mum’s presents, need to get a couple of bits and wrap them. Overwhelm
DP is sorted, I think. I did an Amazon order today and somehow managed not to accidentally sign up for Prime (then forget I’ve done this and end up paying for 6 months of the damn thing). Will need to wrap them
I’m meeting friend #1 tomorrow to exchange gifts. I have hers, but need to sort a necklace for her in the am (I’m a jewellery maker). Annoyed at self for leaving this til the last minute
Friend #2, almost sorted, also needs a necklace
Friend #3 has nice food bits, needs earrings
Friend #4 and her family are sorted, I need to put it all in a bag and drop it off
I have cards to write and post, but I’ve lost the stamps I bought
I wish people IRL knew what a struggle life is, I know this sounds self pitying, it’s not intended to, it’s just that others seem not to have to struggle with this stuff. With the extra Christmas stuff, I’m struggling with work. I have a new manager, she’s no idea of my diagnosis (my choice). She’s lovely, but I’ve made so many mistakes recently, I’m worried she thinks I’m incapable. I could have applied for the manager role, but I couldn’t have managed it, because of my ADHD. I am better medicated, but not happy medicated, because meds numb my feelings and I feel like a robot.
Sorry, offloading, love to you all and bucket loads of empathy. Be kind to yourselves, it’s a tricky time of year

I feel you @WorriedMillie

I have chronic illness on top of ADHD and can't work full time, change roles or take a promotion. Even though intellectually I should be capable of it. So frustrating but I just wouldn't cope. I already have to work extra hours at my job that none else has to work extra hours at. Finished at 8pm tonight having spent most of the day faffing and getting distracted. Oh and I also realised I had forgotten to do something v important at 6.30ish.

Before I was ill I did used to have a management role but I coped with that by working an extraordinary number of hours and running on stress and last minute panic and a touch of hyperfocus. Couldn't do it now and was probably a factor in me becoming very unwell.

Just found more Christmas wrapping paper and a roll of plain brown paper. Why did I buy that? Did I have overambitious ideas about getting the DC to decorate it or something? That's my best guess but I have ZERO memory of it.

Also found 2 x school photos of DD for the GPs, that's an important one, they really want a copy.

Thank you OP!

People asking happily 'all sorted for Christmas then?' are doing my head in!
No, no I'm not

Oh this is so me, overwhelmed overwhelmed overwhelmed

Fuuuuck! There was I thinking I was doing quite well in meeting the Irish last posting day and last posting day for U.K. 2nd class is today! A bloody Saturday when last post goes at midday! Aaargh. Not going to happen!

How likely will things be to arrive on time if I send Monday do you think?

And have just realised my house insurance runs out on Sunday!! Completely forgot despite all my reminders. Aaaargh!

Not doing so well after all.

Panic setting in big time tonight - just did a few orders there.

It’s terrifying how fast the last 4/5 weeks before Christmas fly in isn’t it? The ADHD time blindness is real. I am currently unmedicated just now and it is really showing! This was my first Christmas being diagnosed and I should have stayed on the meds to see how it went and see if it made things easier.

I use a spreadsheet for the children’s presents more to help keep things even than anything else. Christmas is the one and only time of year I am ok with the fact I have no friends as it means I don’t have another list of people to buy for other than my family.

Got the dreaded Christmas clean up to start this weekend as well as lots of work to do .

Hope everyone manages to make some progress this weekend.

Not strictly Christmas related but sorting through some bits and pieces while cleaning for Christmas and have found a folder of old school reports. I had already read one before diagnosis but finding another pile of reports full of ‘easily distracted’ ‘silly mistakes and careless errors’ ‘too chatty’ ‘doesn’t read instructions carefully enough’ ‘messy work’ etc has made me really sad. I would have been absolutely rinsed by my parents for these reports too and all along I needed help :(

It’s galling to see that. I bet a few of you have experienced similar.

Yes, I took my school reports to the appointment where I got diagnosed. They all said "falalala is very bright and would do well if only she was more organised"

You actually sound way more organised than me, because I have literally got nothing, except one main present for DD (still to be picked up) and one main present for DS (collected this morning).
I don’t know if it is ADHD or disorganisation or just being burnt out parenting and fed up of spending money on more stuff (am a single parent), but I need to get my act together quick.
I would consider myself quite well ahead if I had boxes of stuff stashed around the house

Not sure why that came out a wink, was meant to be a smile!

@EllieSattler

Sack off the picture calendar and blame covid or Brexit for suppliers not delivering it.

Stick a wash on. Sit down. Make a cup of tea, write a list of who needs presents and what you want to buy them. Then go mad on Amazon Prime or similar.

I bought cards for my DC to.write for their classmates but haven't got the heart to do it. Just can't be arsed. Need to do all the wrapping too. Not sure when I'm going to get it done. Might need to start tonight.

I did this too.

My 12 yo DD is much more organised than me and is supervising most of the preparations. DH undiagnosed ASC, I’m certain, and he is obsessed about food related things. Also time blind though, but won’t entertain any diagnosis. DS (9), as yet undiagnosed ADHD, creates utter chaos in his adorably cute but infuriating way. He has been rescued by friends today so is out of the way. As soon as I tidy something, he has moved it again.
Does anyone have amazing ideas that they can never get round to executing? We have all sorts of things out for decorating the dolls’ houses! But it won’t happen!
Visitors arrive Christmas Eve and we’re all off work/ school now in our house, so plenty of time left. Except we started an entire house sort out about a month ago for no apparent reason, so everywhere is upside down.

I literally forgot that I was supposed to be going out on Saturday night. I had decided not to go but just didn't tell anyone. Kept thinking I had time to do that. Suddenly remembered at 8pm Sat night that it was meant to be happening now and I hadn't declined to the host.. Fuck. Luckily many others had pulled out and it didn't go ahead but I still feel terrible about it. How rude.

I haven’t sent anyone a Christmas card. It’s very rude isn’t it? I always do it at the start of December but this year I had a bereavement at that time and I didn’t feel able to write the cards without this persons name. There are undoubtedly people who don’t know about the bereavement and they just think I am rude. My husband could have written the cards but he didn’t bother. He says he’s too busy just going to work never mind writing cards.

I've come on here for moral support and realised that I've missed the Irish last post and the 2nd class last post. I was going to sit down today and write my cards. Sigh. I didn't write cards last year as I was in a massive covid sulk so was going to repent this year. That'll be a bulk lot of 1st class stamps I'll be buying then...

I've also lost my "master Christmas notepad".

Although, first year I'm medicated, so yay!

I'm with you OP, I have awful executive function but I love Christmas and DP is a bit hands off with it at my insistence so it all falls to me.

A spreadsheet was a game changer. It started a year or two ago as a planning thing and I then realised I can use it for the actual planning too. It obviously helps me keep track of exactly what I have bought as I do a lot of online shopping/stashing away, and I have conditional formatting columns for whether the present has been bought, delivered, wrapped. It's very helpful and then I can count up the presents to make sure nothing has been left behind as I know exact numbers.

I am very surprised that I have managed to start wrapping presents before Christmas eve this year. Since my first DC was born I have always had to wrap on the night before and it is an absolute nightmare, know that you cannot stop no matter what!

My people! I cannot get my brain to focus this week. Feels like I’m driving without my glasses on.

Christmases past I could power through on shame and self loathing but now that I know I’m not just a crap person, I can’t summon enough emotion to get stuff done.

I just want to wake up on the 26th

@falalalalalalalallama

How come it's me who has ADHD yet ends up doing Christmas shopping for me, DP, my mum, MIL (a bit).

And not without protest! But they still ask, and (except for MIL) I know if I don't do it, it won't happen. Grrrr.

How does this happen? And not just picking stuff up but thinking it up in the first place. I even end up wrapping them in different paper.

@Myadhdusername

Not strictly Christmas related but sorting through some bits and pieces while cleaning for Christmas and have found a folder of old school reports. I had already read one before diagnosis but finding another pile of reports full of ‘easily distracted’ ‘silly mistakes and careless errors’ ‘too chatty’ ‘doesn’t read instructions carefully enough’ ‘messy work’ etc has made me really sad. I would have been absolutely rinsed by my parents for these reports too and all along I needed help :(

It’s galling to see that. I bet a few of you have experienced similar.

I relatively recently discovered/was told I probably have ADHD and ASD. Landlord is coming to inspect the house and I've been going through everything, I wanting it all sorted! Found a box with old report cards. It really ticked all the boxes for ADHD. Not sure what I'm going to do with this info, apart from feel a little better that I'm not just a bit crap and lazy.

Not diagnosed but recently became suspicious that I have adhd. The struggle is real! Every year I just want to skip the country until it's all over and it startsearlierandearlierand I still end up faffing around last minute. I don't even have kids and just have a small family but all the gift buying palaver is so hard to sort out. Trying to stop it with my two very organised friends who also have December birthdays because it's always a last minute stress 😩

The group I've needed all my life!

As a teacher (occasional Senco) I did a course on ADHD in the first lockdown and the penny dropped. I really don't think my family would get it even if I had a diagnosis.

I finished my job (for ever - ish) on Friday and now need to start on Christmas. Saturday (apart from a wedding via zoom) was sorting dd2's room ready for her to come back for Christmas. Yesterday was dd1's birthday so nothing got started till today. Dd2 is already hoovering because the stairs aren't done.

Honestly, I have the vision but my head is chaotic. I want perfection so am setting myself up to fail.

Omg lol only just seen this thread :o

I have actually wrapped about half the presents for the DC this year!

Stupidly didn't take covid delays into account when sending stuff to relatives abroad though. Argh.

I have ADHD and stopped my meds as my sleep was so awful.. net result..not written cards, have huge stack af amazon boxes no clue what's in them...considering putting all around tree and inviting children to do a lucky dip. I have no Xmas food except 2 bloody turkeys as put in a just in case order at waitrose as couldn't get to farm shop. Ordered from farm shop and now too late to cancel waitrose.. arse.. and I'm vegetarian...I would quite like to hide until January now.