Is it fair to give TA less than teacher

[cheeriobye]

I've read that some TA's don't get given a gift when the teacher does and I've also read that sometimes TA will get a gift but of a lower value compared to teacher.

Is this fair?

In my case it is the teacher that has made a large difference to my child's education and I know they spend a great deal of time outside the classroom on working too. Therefore that's what I want to acknowledge at Christmas.

The TA in my case would get a token gift.

Is this fair and ok? Also appreciate responses from TA's

I worked as a ta but had to leave as the salary was pitiful £12,000 to £14,000 per year. I worked 8-3.30. Meetings at 8am were important debriefing sessions about certain students and cover needed. Teachers used to get presents, we did not. I did think it odd, as I worked just as hard e.g. would teach/supervise the difficult students, do the teacher could focus on the others. I often thought, it would be nicer if parents sent in chocolates to share.

I think we should put a stop to the present buying business. Just get your child to write a card. Madness!

I get the TAs the same as the class teacher, just a little box of chocolates and a card. I figure they are all important adults for my children who help them in different ways! I try to include the TAs who I know work 1:1 with particular students as I they still have an overall class role. I just think they’re all amazing! Particularly at my sons preschool (it’s part of the school) as the patience they show is just phenomenal.

One of the TAs in my sons class recently had to hold hands with the camels during the school nativity and trot across the stage repeatedly with them - I did contemplate buying her large amounts of gin

I am a T.A , I never expect a gift and wouldn't be offended by one of a lower financial value. Also, some classes have several different T.As throughout the week. But, just like many others have said, it is often the T.A who is "caring" for your child, if they feel ill or upset, need first aid, have an accident, help to change for p.e etc or need additional support in the classroom. When this is recognised by a little personal note in a christmas card it makes my day more than a bottle of prosecco would. Also, although a 1:1 SEN T.A, I still have a relationship with all the children in my class. Receiving a gift is lovely but I would never judge a parent for not giving anything.

I really feel for TA’s when they get a lesser gift it would be better not to do it at all.
Teachers couldn’t manage without the support of their teaching assistants and they work so hard going above and beyond for a measly salary.
It does sort of smack of being thought less of.

When my kids were at primary, at one point i was buying so many damn gifts as they all had LSAs. Unsustainable

When some of the parents used to organise class collections at DD’s primary they would always ask for less for the TA than for the teacher. I never felt comfortable with this so would give the same amount, as would one or two others.

The argument made was that teachers spend more of their own money on things for the kids - Xmas gifts etc. However, as stated above, TAs are paid an absolute pittance for the work they do, which was why it didn’t sit easy with me.

I’d just go with your instincts and what feels fair to you.

My son has a 1:1 ta that is amazing, she gets a "better" present than the class teacher, lunch support and other class ta's who also work with my son. I guess it depends on the situation. For my other child at primary all the staff got the same.

@cheeriobye

I've read that some TA's don't get given a gift when the teacher does and I've also read that sometimes TA will get a gift but of a lower value compared to teacher.

Is this fair?

In my case it is the teacher that has made a large difference to my child's education and I know they spend a great deal of time outside the classroom on working too. Therefore that's what I want to acknowledge at Christmas.

The TA in my case would get a token gift.

Is this fair and ok? Also appreciate responses from TA's

I am a teacher now but I have been a TA and a one-to-one LSA. I work FAR longer hours now that I am a teacher but I also get paid more.

I also probably have a smaller relationship with each child (1 - 30) than I did as a TA (working with small groups, so possibly quite important to them and not at all to others in the class) or 1-to-1.

You will know who you want thank and why. Christmas gifts are not essential but, like any human, it is very nice to be acknowledged. It has been genuinely a very, very tough couple of years for school staff and most will feel as though they are staggering over the finish line.

Specific kind words will probably have the most value over any gift. If the teacher has made a large difference then they will love to hear that. I think often of one of my class parents in the first lockdown who sent me an email every 10 days or so saying thank you, acknowledging my efforts and recognising it was not easy. Those words have stayed with me but I genuinely could not tell you now whether she ever gave me a gift or not.

In short, do not be scared to do what you want! There are no rules and there (should be) no expectations.

I can honestly say in 10 years of being a TA I have never not received a gift the same, or very similar to the class teacher. Possibly because I see the parents in the morning, and let the children out at the end of the day, so parents see more of me than the teacher.

I have received cards with kind from parents, when the teacher hasn't, but that's because I'm the one who finds the lost jumpers and changes wet pants and puts plasters on grazed knees.

I think TAs in the school I work on are just as respected as teaching staff, but I'm aware it's not the same in all school. Being a TA is a very different job from being a teacher; lots of people seem to view it as a wannabe teacher roll, but it really isn't. I have no desire whatsoever to be a teacher!

If I'm 100% honest, if you have the class teacher a gift and not me, I'd think I'd offended you somehow.

I always gave DDs TAs a very nice gifts, but that's because they worked one to one with her, and went out of their way to chat if I ever bumped into them in town.

Class collection, give the same if they are full time. Individual gifts, really depends how much they help your child. I do factor in that pay for a TA is barely above min wage.

As a teacher, i quite like it when children bring a tin of biscuits or box of chocolates for myself and TA to share. We stash them in the classroom cupboard and they help us through the dark days of January and February!!

I don't expect a gift but a card is nice every now and then. Also, think of the middays who don't really get anything. I'm a midday currently but also do cover TA work.

I am a TA.
I wish i did leave at 3.30 every day!
I spend a lot of time with the children- any problems, it is usually me mopping up tears, i do first aid, etc
I also plan and deliver intervention activities, buy things to help my children/ make their day better.
Work quite intensely with children, making sure they understand their work and helping them achieve their targets.

I don't care about gifts but i just want to point out that we work bloody hard, care a lot and get paid very little.

I was a TA for many years and never got out the door before 4:30pm at the earliest! TAs are worth their weight in gold

I think it depends, in my situation DS has SEN (in mainstream) so his teachers do a lot for him however his TA really does go above and beyond and because of her he has gone from a school refusing anxious child who had meltdowns at the end of everyday to a child who although not happy to go to school does go and comes out smiling and full of stories of silly things he and TA have got up to so the teachers (class share) got a token box of chocolates and a £5 costa gift card plus a box of classroom supplies (gluesticks, pens, pencils etc as i know they buy stuff themselves) and the TA got a personalised canvas bag, box of chocolates, bottle of wine and £10 costa gift card.

DD is an intelligent, happy easy child who loves school, teacher reports she just gets on with things and they dont really notice shes there so both teacher and TA got a token gift of chocolates and £5 costa gift card.

Preschool asked for paint so i bought them 30 bottles

The TA might not directly work with your child but the work she/he does with others will enable the teacher to make that difference you talk about.

I'm a TA. I don't expect a gift at all but it's very much appreciated when I do. However, I do think that TAs are viewed as lesser and we certainly get paid less. We work with the most needy children- whether it's for behaviour or learning difficulties. We do outside duty in all weather, we comfort upset kids, we deal with wet pants, period pains, arguments and more.

Not sure what I'm getting at here- any gift is so much appreciated but remember TAs work so very hard too. And we love all your kids like they're our own.

@ItsSnowJokes

I get them all the same. TAs may do shorter hours but they are paid such a pittance for what they do that they deserve the same. They have all got a £10 voucher from my child.

This will bells on.

Teachers are paid a lot more money for the extra hours and work they put it.
I wouldn't assume that the TA is working less hard than the fully qualified just because they don't hold the highest title.

I had a TA in primary... they worked with me closely and did a great job. I notice nowadays they work with a lot of problematic children too which isn't easy.

Oh, and the school I work in has asked for no gifts for environmental reasons. Instead parents can donate to a central fund to be shared equally between staff. (Some parents still choose to give small gifts, such as a single cup cake baked by their child.) I'm not keen on this idea, although it's anonymous I find it awkward. The money I received from the collected pot was spent on tissues for the class. I provide a box a week for the class.

And for those wondering - I'm paid from 8:30- 4pm, but usually arrive at 8am and leave anywhere between 4pm and 5pm. Working through lunch is a given. It's only because DH earns much more than I do that I can afford to be a TA.

I certainly am not offended if I get a smaller gift than my teacher. Her work goes home with her, her planning takes hours and hours, whereas mine is more holistic and on the fly(since I only cover lessons in staffing emergencies). I do work my arse off with my children and give it my all. But my work very much ends when I leave the building, whereas my teachers work never seems to end.

The best gift I ever received though was an origami dogs face that a little 4 year old made with his mum. I'd done so much work with that boy and he made strides with his separation anxiety. Knowing mum worked and time was always in short supply, the fact they had sat together and made time to make me something meant the world to me. I still have it 12 years later

It gets complicated though when you have lots of staff who aren't full time. We have 2 ta who split their time around the school and two teachers. Class collection teachers get 52 quid ish hamper. Ta get 20 each from us plus 20 from another class so 40 quid hamper. Plus whatever from the other classes.

I never did gifts differently. DD's TAs, especially in Infant, were absolute amazing ladies and I knew they did stuff at the weekend and after work to take some burden off the teachers like preparing arts & craft stuff, did shopping for supplies and also always were the ones who had the shitty jobs when a child had accidents.

Can I then sense check - I've donated to the class fund for teacher and TA's but my son has a 1-1 all day. If he brings her an additional token gift is that OK?

When my DC were in primary, I found this issue a bit tricky. There was 1 known teacher and then the school had a big bank if TAs and lots of different ones were in the class at different times during the week. I knew some but not all and not even all their names.

In total, there could have been almost 10 different adults in the class over the week.

So with gifts, I tended to send a big box of biscuits or chocs for the staffroom. It felt more straightforward.

I agree with others that there cannot be a blanket rule on this. People have different attitudes to gifting anyway, plus different budgets. Everyone must choose who they wish to gift to, if at all. Choose who you think has had a personal impact on your child. If in doubt, a gift for any adults involved to share such as food is a good idea. Sending it for the New Year after there have been heaps before Christmas can be good and bring a small amount of cheer into a miserable January morning.

I agree that TAs are very underpaid. Yes, they often work very fixed hours, but many aren't full time and don't get paid in holidays and often are taking home less than £10k. Presents though aren't a subbing of salary. In my view someone doesn't 'deserve' a gift more becaue they are poorly paid or because they are well paid.

Where things can feel uncomfortable is where classes have a collection and money is divvied out between adults involved in the class. I can see how this can send a message to all staff about their 'relative worth' to the parents. Those collections are kindly meant and difficult to organise and also difficult to decide how to allocate. As a teacher or TA, personally, I'd not be expecting anything and anything given would just be a bonus. Avoiding comparisons or being too interested in what I personally was given or certainly what others have been given, is probably key to keeping all this in perspective.

It seems some teachers or TAs perhaps do get rather caught up in keeping tabs on what they've been given and what others have been given. Getting your sense of value from this kind of thing doesn't generally end well. Being pleased with what you get and not giving it too much thought is much better.

As is often said on MN, comparison is the thief of joy. It really applies here.